


Just You And Me

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, Humor, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Michael Novotny Bashing, Orgy, Romance, Threesome, Unsafe Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-27
Updated: 2008-03-27
Packaged: 2018-12-27 01:17:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 139,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12070740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: Brian and Justin meet each other in a different way. Brian and Justin are both very stubborn, they are a lot alike. They answer to no one not even one another when things start to get more than serious. Thanks to Rose Thorn for the banner.





	1. Inexplicable

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

  
Author's notes: This story is for Aida. Hope you like it baby. Enjoy everyone. A million thanks to my beta CuJo. She’s the best.  


* * *

_I go crazy, crazy, baby, I go crazy_  
You turn it on, then you're gone  
Yeah you drive me crazy, crazy, crazy for you baby 

Brian grunted as someone bumped into him. He was grateful that the cup of coffee he was holding didn’t spill on his suit or he would have to kill someone. He looked at the guy in front of him and smirked at what he saw. The blond guy was wearing a red shirt, black leather jacket, black jeans and boots. He had the bluest eyes that Brian had ever seen and white skin to die for. There was a certain aura around the man that told Brian that the blond was merely a kid trying to play a bad-ass. “Don't you watch where the fuck you are going?”

Justin arched a brow and smirked. The guy in front of him was so totally checking him out. “No, obviously, or we wouldn’t have bumped into one another. You’re quite blind yourself, unless you wanted to bump into me. But I can’t blame you for wanting to,” he gave the brunet a sexy smile. He looked Brian over from head to toe and liked what he saw. The brunet had the most amazing hazel eyes he had ever seen. He looked like he had jumped off of the cover of a magazine.

Brian arched a brow and smiled. He liked the kid’s attitude.

“As much as I like to stay and chat, I need to go,” Justin moved to the side with every intention of leaving, but Brian's words stop him.

“How about a cup of coffee?” Brian didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. He just didn’t want to let the blond out of his sight.

“I don’t drink coffee,” Justin smiled at Brian and looked around the establishment. There were people getting their orders at the counter then leaving quickly while others opted to sit at the little round tables made for two.

“I’m sure I can find something in here that you do swallow,” Brian was surprised that the blond wasn’t fazed at all by his innuendo. Instead he watched, stunned, as Justin walked away from him.

Justin sat down with his back to Brian, then turned around and looked at Brian with a raised brow. Brian sighed and walked over to him. He put his coffee on the table and sat down. He had never done anything like this and didn't have a clue what was expected next.

“Do you have a name or should I just go by 'hey you'?” Justin looked at Brian who was currently staring at his hands. He was getting very interested in knowing this man in front of him. There was so much mystery to him and he wanted to find out every detail.

“Brian Kinney,” he grabbed his cup of coffee and took a sip. He let the hot liquid travel down his throat and tried to control his nerves. Why the fuck he was nervous was beyond him. He looked to the side when he heard laughter and saw two women laughing as they looked at each other. He glanced back at Justin and saw that the blond was studying him.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked a little bit worried.

“Fine,” Brian took another sip and felt some of his strength come back. He looked at Justin and knew he had to have the blond in front of him. “You haven’t told me your name.”

“You haven’t asked,” Justin smiled when he saw Brian frown. He liked to use sarcasm a lot and if Brian didn’t like it, which was the brunet’s problem.

“What is it?” Brian asked knowing that they were wasting time. He needed to be at work not talking to this guy.

“Justin Taylor,” he smiled at Brian and put his hand out in front of the brunet. His smile doubled when Brian seized it and shook it. “It’s a pleasure.”

“Not yet,” Brian smirked.

Justin laughed as he pulled his hand back. “You're cute.”

“I don’t do cute,” Brian sighed as he stared at the blond.

“And here I was hoping you did me,” Justin smiled when Brian scoffed. He waited for the brunet to say something but Brian didn’t. “Are you shy?”

“No,” Brian smiled at the question. The guys would die laughing if they knew someone had asked him that.

“Do you date a lot?” Justin asked with a raised brow.

“No,” Brian admitted. “Never.”

“I could tell. You seem nervous,” Justin watched as Brian’s face turned angry.

“The fuck I am,” Brian hissed. “Why would I be? I’m not dating you.”

“I didn’t say you were. It's just that you don’t have anything to say and yet here we are. I mean, you either want to fuck me and that’s that...but a cup of coffee? Is that the line you always use and they just fall down on their knees imploring you?” Justin watched Brian’s expression. He was sure no one had talked to the brunet so bluntly before or at least Brian wasn’t expecting it from him.

“Well, I’m not nervous. And I do want to fuck you. I will fuck you,” Brian assured him.

“I’m an artist. I notice things and I say you are nervous,” Justin arched a brow at Brian and waited to see what the brunet had to say.

Brian sighed. He felt like he was suffocating. He had to get out of here. Justin smiled and moved his chair closer. He put his hand on Brian’s thigh and licked his lips.

“Don’t worry. I think it’s cute,” Justin told him as he leaned closer. “I don’t date either but we could have a fun time,” his hand reached for Brian’s dick.

Brian gasped as one of Justin’s hands touched his hard cock.

“You are easy,” Justin whispered.

“Guess I am,” Brian told him in a hoarse voice.

“We have a lot in common,” Justin then kissed Brian. His hand never moved from where it was. It just applied more pressure.

Brian was ready to jump the blond right there. He didn’t care if they got sent to jail for it. He was going to have the blond. Then it was all over when Justin moved his hand away.

“I have to go,” Justin got up as he looked at his watch. He bent down and kissed Brian on the lips once last time. “I’ll see you around, stud.”

“What?” Brian couldn’t believe this guy. “You are such a cock teaser.”

“Don’t act like a baby. I told you I had to go, but I did say I will see you again,” Justin winked at Brian and walked away making sure to give Brian a show, swaying his ass for the brunet as he walked away.

Brian wanted to strangle the blond. The smaller man had another thing coming if he thought that he would get another chance with him. He was going to teach Justin not to mess with him.

***

_You know you drive me up the wall the way  
You make good for all the nasty tricks you pull_

Brian tried to get Justin out of his mind. Three trips to the backroom, endless drinks and a mix of drugs were doing nothing for him. He couldn’t stop thinking about those amazing lips and that fuckable ass. He hated himself for not being able to stop.

“Hey,” Michael smiled at his friend. “What’s wrong? You seem troubled.”

“I’m fine,” Brian asked for another shot.

“You don’t sound fine,” Emmett told him.

“Fuck off,” Brian hissed.

“Okay,” Emmett looked at Michael who only shrugged.

“Brian, what’s going on?” Michael asked putting his arm behind Brian’s back.

“Well, the thing is...” Brian said as he looked at Michael. “My friends don’t get the meaning of fuck off.”

Michael sighed and pulled away from the brunet. Ted shook his head and bought a beer for everyone.

“Forget it, Michael,” Emmett said to his friend. “He's not worth the trouble.”

Michael sighed, knowing that if Brian wanted to get himself drunk and pass out, he would without telling him a thing.

“So what happen with that guy that you were dating?” Ted asked Michael.

Michael sighed and took his beer. “He was an asshole.”

Brian scoffed.

Emmett looked at Brian and rolled his eyes. “There will be others.”

Ted nodded and smiled at Michael. Michael looked at Brian and wished he could get through to the brunet.

“Mmm,” Emmett watched the blond dancing in the middle of the throbbing mass. “Hot, new stuff.”

Michael turned around to see what Emmett was talking about. He was getting nowhere with Brian so he would let him the brunet vent for a while.

“He would be perfect for you, Michael,” Emmett told him.

“I can’t talk to him,” Michael protested. “He would never look at me.”

“Sure he would,” Ted told him.

Emmett gave his drink to Ted and, without wasting any time, went directly over to the blond to talk. After a moment's conversation, he invited him to join his friends for a beer. “Guys, this is Justin. He just moved here a few months ago from California. He’s an artist.”

Ted looked at Emmett and then at his watch. He was sure that Emmett could be a reporter. No one could be as fast as him when gathering information from a person as Emmett.

“Hello,” Justin said looking at Emmett’s friends.

“This is Michael,” Emmett said putting his arm around him. “He’s single.”

Justin smirked and nodded. Michael blushed slightly. He though Justin was very hot.

“Want a beer?” Ted asked him.

“Sure,” Justin answered.

Ted went to get him a beer.

“Something you do swallow,” Brian muttered.

Everyone turned to look at Brian. Justin turned his head sideways and smiled when he realized it was Brian.

“Among other things,” Justin said walking towards Brian. “Hello, stud.”

“You guys know each other?” Emmett asked.

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” Ted handed Justin his beer.

Justin took a sip and turned to look at Brian. He was wearing a big smile. “So, how is it going?”

Brian looked at Justin and then ignored him.

Justin waited a few seconds but when he realized that Brian was really ignoring, him he shrugged. “I’ll guess we’ll see each other.”

“Don’t mind him, honey,” Emmett smiled at the blond. “He’s like that.”

Justin nodded and took a sip of his beer. “I’ll see you guys around.”

“Why don’t you just fuck off?” Brian asked turning to look at the blond. “You have that art pat down.”

“Are we still mad about what happened at the coffee shop?” Justin crossed his arms. “I had an emergency. I was supposed to help my friend, not stop on the way to her house to pick up boys.”

“I’m not a boy,” Brian looked at his drink wondering how he had ended up talking to Justin.

The guys kept silent just watching the exchange.

“I meant the guy I was fucking in the bathroom,” Justin smirked when Brian turned completely around. “Not that I need to explain anything to you. It’s none of your damn business.”

Brian wanted to tell Justin to get lost, but he didn’t want to do that before he fucked the blond. “So?”

“I should go,” Justin said. “You told me to fuck off or something like that.”

Brian shrugged.

Justin smirked. “But you did say you were going to fuck me. So do you want to?”

Brian smiled and came face to face with the blond. He grabbed him by the waist and pulled him closer. “You are in for quite a night.”

“I really hope so,” Justin turned around and pulled Brian’s arm with him.

Brian just followed him smirking.

“That was different,” Emmett told them.

“Brian ended going away with the trick,” Ted looked at Emmett. “How is that different?”

“It just was,” Emmett told him.

Michael watched as Brian and Justin walked out of the club. He was so fucking mad that Brian had left him there. They hadn’t spent any time together.

“Do you have a car?” Brian asked once they were outside.

Justin nodded. “How about I follow you,” he smiled as his eyes traveled up and down Brian’s body.

“Fine,” Brian walked to his car, looking back periodically to make sure Justin was following him. He wasn’t going to let the blond get away from him again.

Justin closed the door to his Jeep and walked over to where Brian was waiting for him at the door. He smiled when Brian kissed him before letting him in. They took the elevator and Brian didn’t hold back. He pinned Justin to the wall and ravished him.

“I think we are here,” Justin said when he moved back to breathe and felt they weren’t moving any longer.

Brian opened the doors and pulled the blond with him. He opened the door to the loft and they went inside. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“A beer would be fine,” Justin told him. He walked away from the kitchen and looked around the loft. “Nice place,” he smiled, liking Brian’s style.

Brian came back with the beers and gave one to Justin. “So, you come all the way from Cali.”

Justin nodded. “Yeah, I’m working at Myers, Inc. And some freelance too,” Justin smiled when he saw the bed. “I like that very much. You should give me a tour.”

Brian smirked as he stood behind Justin. “I am giving you more than that.”

Justin smiled and turned around. They kissed slowly and then pulled back. Justin pushed the beer into Brian’s chest. “Hurry up,” he turned around and walked to the bedroom as he stripped down.

Brian licked his lips and walked to the island where he put the beers. Then he walked back to where Justin was already naked and in the middle of the bed. “You’re fast.”

Justin smiled and rolled onto his back. He touched his nipples, staring at Brian while he did it. Brian watched him and slowly took off his shirt. Justin licked his palm and then grabbed his cock. He started jerking himself off, never taking his eyes off of Brian. Brian undid his pants and took them off along with his boots. He got rid of his socks and got in the bed. He watched as the blond moaned and writhed on his bed. He took hold on Justin’s hips with one hand and with the other he started playing with Justin’s sac.

“Yes,” Justin gasped out.

Brian leaned over Justin and kissed him on the neck. He smelled the blond and smiled. He sucked on the blond’s neck and then slowly let his body collide with Justin’s. They moaned and grunted against each other. Brian grabbed Justin’s head and kissed him hard. He pushed Justin’s lips open and pushed his tongue deep inside the blond. Justin’s mind was running wild with a million thoughts at once and nothing made sense. No one had made him feel the way Brian was. He smiled and pushed Brian off of him.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked as he tried to kiss the blond again.

Justin laughed and pushed him off again.

“Stop it and come here,” Brian grabbed him by the arms and pushed them up. He kissed him hard while he held his arms up with one hand. He opened Justin’s legs with the other. Justin was squirming and Brian stopped.

“Did you change your mind?” Brian asked sighing.

“No,” Justin told him.

Brian frowned and then stared at Justin. “Then what do you want?”

“What you were doing was fine,” Justin told him.

Brian got on his knees and smirked. “So you like to be manhandled,” he grabbed Justin by the hips and pulled him closer. He let his hand travel from Justin’s balls up to his mouth.

Justin shook under his touch. Brian stuck two fingers inside the blond’s mouth and Justin sucked them. He straddled Justin’s body and moved until he was straddling Justin’s head. He pulled his fingers away. He grabbed his cock and fed it to Justin. Justin moaned around Brian’s cock.

“Ah,” Brian smiled as he threw his head back. His fingers wrapped around Justin’s hair. “That’s...fuck!”

Justin pulled away from Brian’s cock as he moved his head to the side. “Good?” He asked smirking.

Brian licked the sweat from his upper lip and pushed his hard dick inside Justin’s mouth once again. He grunted and moved his hips as the blond worked him. After a few minutes, he closed his eyes and then pulled back completely.

Brian aligned his body with Justin’s. He kissed him hard, tasting himself on the blond. He reached for a condom and ripped it open. He got on his knees and put it on. He pushed Justin’s legs up on his shoulder and got ready to enter him.

“Oh, fuck!” Justin screamed when Brian entered him hard.

Brian fucked him with long, slow strokes.

Justin was moaning and screaming for more. “Please.”

Brian pulled all of the way out and turned Justin around. He placed Justin on all fours and grabbed Justin’s shoulders as he pushed inside the blond again. Justin closed his eyes shut and pushed back. He gripped the sheets as they moved as one. They both came at the same time.

“Fuck,” Brian said as he pulled out of the blond.

Justin looked at Brian and returned the brunet smile. “You are amazing.”

Brian was used to hearing that.

“Show me incredible now,” Justin arched a brow and waited.

Brian smirked and pulled Justin on top of him. “I’ll show you.”

They spent all night fucking. Brian showed Justin all the things he wanted every time he asked.

“You really are something else,” Justin said as he lay on his back.

Brian looked at the blond, but didn’t say anything. He hoped that Justin was done for the night. He was exhausted. He looked at Justin who was smiling.

“Tired?” Justin asked and shook his head at Brian. He knew Brian was exhausted. He reached for his pants and pulled out a box of cigarettes.

“No,” Brian told him. “I’m not.”

Justin watched as Brian closed his eyes and didn’t move again. He laughed and finished his cigarette before he got comfortable in the bed and went to sleep next to Brian.

***

_I like it when you chain me to the bed  
But then your secrets never show_

Brian moaned and pushed against Justin’s warm mouth. He took a deep breath and then gasped. He opened his eyes and realized that he wasn’t sleeping. He smiled at the blond and pushed his hips up hard.

“I see you are up,” Justin said after he pulled back. He straddled Brian’s hips.

Brian was about to grab Justin and fuck him but couldn’t move. He looked up and saw his arms tied up. “What the fuck are you doing?” He tried to move away but Justin had tied him well. “Untie me.”

Justin shook his head. He leaned down and kissed Brian’s neck. He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes letting the scent fill him. “I am going to fuck you,” he licked Brian’s neck and the man shuddered underneath him. He let his fingers caress Brian’s shoulder and marveled at the tone muscles. “You are going to like it.”

“The fuck you are,” Brian hissed and glared at him.

Justin laughed and kissed Brian’s neck. He licked down and sucked the brunet’s left nipple with his mouth while his hand worked the other one. He kept moving down licking and nibbling on Brian’s abs. His hands moved to grabbed Brian’s hips as he tongued the brunet’s navel. Then he kept going and kissed Brian’s hips and bit him.

“Ah,” Brian bent his legs when Justin started licking his cock. He was going wild with what Justin was doing to him.

Justin licked his lips and then sucked two fingers inside his mouth. He ran them over Brian’s crack making the brunet grunt. He started sucking Brian’s balls as his fingers started round Brian’s ass. After torturing Brian for a few minutes, he moved down and kissed Brian’s hole.

“Fuck!” Brian’s body trembled.

Justin got on his knees and grabbed the lube. He put some on his fingers as Brian watched him. He arched a brow as he pushed two fingers inside the brunet. He watched as Brian closed his eyes and pushed against him. He grabbed Brian’s hips and stopped him. “You are enjoying yourself too much for someone who doesn’t want this.”

Brian opened his eyes and looked fiercely at the blond. “Fuck you!”

Justin scissor his fingers and Brian moaned and gripped them inside of him. “You do like this.”

Brian grunted but didn’t say anything. He tried to open his eyes but couldn’t. He felt another finger slip inside of him and he was going wild. He wanted Justin to fuck him already but he wasn’t going to let Justin win.

“Should I stop now?” Justin asked and then dived for Brian’s cock.

“Fuck!” Brian wanted to touch Justin. He wanted to kiss him but he wasn’t telling him that. He wanted the blond to keep touching him.

Justin sucked Brian for a while as he kept fucking him with his fingers. Then he stopped all together and smiled when Brian whimpered. He grabbed a condom and looked at Brian. “You know you want it,” he put it on and watched Brian who was far gone. He positioned himself at Brian’s entrance and grabbed Brian by the hair. “Do you want to?”

Brian moved his head from side to side. He wasn’t going to tell Justin to fuck him.

“Say it,” Justin’s told him in a hoarse voice as he rubbed around Brian’s asshole.

Brian moved his hips, pushing against Justin. He closed his eyes and electricity shook him to his core when Justin started licking his chest while he jacked him off.

“I know you want it,” Justin muttered. “You just have to say it,” he smiled and pushed a finger inside Brian.

“Fuck!” Brian hissed and pushed against the blond.

“What was that?” Justin asked.

“Fuck me,” Brian said in a really low voice.

Justin shook his head. “I shouldn’t. I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

“Fuck me!” Brian hissed as he closed his eyes.

Justin moved forward and untied Brian. “Now tell me what you want,” he whispered over Brian’s ear.

“Fuck me,” Brian whispered and wrapped his legs around Justin’s waist.

Justin smiled as he pushed the head of his cock inside the brunet. Then he stopped, waiting for Brian to relax.

“Fuck me,” Brian opened his eyes and stared at Justin. He saw the blond smirking and he couldn’t take it. He had let Justin win.

Justin pushed inside the brunet all the way. “Good.”

Brian closed his eyes as the burn hit him. It had been a while time since anyone took him. He could tell that Justin knew what he was doing when he started moving; torturing him. He fisted the sheets and looked at the blond, thinking how hot he looked.

“Is there something on your mind?” Justin asked smiling as he buried himself deep in the brunet.

Brian arched his body as he was filled. He moved his hips with Justin. It was so fucking good. He just gripped Justin between his legs. Justin grabbed Brian’s legs behind his knee and pushed them up. He started moving faster and faster as he hammered inside the brunet. When he was close, he let go of Brian’s legs and started jerking him off.

“Kiss me,” Justin told him, his face merely inches away from Brian.

Brian lifted his head and kissed him hard. He gasped and pulled back when Justin started rubbing repeatedly over his prostate. “Fuck!” he yelled and splashed his cum between their bodies.

Justin kept moving his hips, still holding Brian’s hips as his orgasm took him. His body was drenched in sweat. He sat back on his knees, pulling out of the brunet, and then got off the bed to get rid of the condom. Walking back, Justin kissed the brunet hard. “Like it?” he asked in a really low voice.

Brian nodded and moved his hand to Justin’s face pulling him in for another kiss.

“I have to go,” Justin whispered and then grabbed his clothes. He got dressed in silence while Brian stayed in the bed. Before he left, he kissed Brian again, hard and painful, then pulled back. “I’ll see you later, stud,” Then he walked away.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed as he sat up. He looked towards the open door and sighed. Justin was gone and he was so fucking pissed. He was going to kill the blond. How dare he fuck him? He closed his eyes and thought about Justin being inside of him and he got hard immediately.

Brian was going to make Justin pay. He was so going to kill Justin...after he fucked him one last time. That got him thinking about what had happened again and he had to take a shower and jerk off. He couldn’t believe the things Justin did to him even when the blond wasn’t there.

***

_That kinda lovin' turns a man to a slave  
That kinda lovin' sends a man right to his grave_

Justin was dancing when he saw that Brian had arrived. He was with his friends so Justin didn’t go toward the brunet right away. He danced a little bit more then went to the bar. Brian was still there and they looked at each other. Justin smirked and walked over to the brunet.

“What do you want?” Brian asked looking at his drink, trying really hard not to look at the blond.

“Did I say I wanted something?” Justin asked as he looked at Michael who was glaring at him. “Do you have a problem with me?”

Brian looked from Michael to Justin and sighed. He turned around to ask for another drink. Michael ignored Justin.

“So, do you want to dance?” Justin asked.

Brian arched a brow as he looked at the blond. “Sorry, I am here to spend time with my friends,” he said. “Guess you will have to leave. Besides, I already had you.”

Justin looked at Brian’s friend then at the brunet. He smiled and nodded. Brian swallowed when he saw him go. He thought that the blond would try to push back. He turned around and reached inside his pocket. He took an ecstasy and smiled at Michael.

“Want one?” Brian asked.

Michael shook his head.

“I can believe you pushed him away,” Ted told him. “He’s hot.”

“For you, everyone is hot,” Brian told him. “I already fucked him.”

“Want to dance?” Michael asked smiling. He was happy that Justin was gone.

Brian put his arms around Michael and they walked to the dance floor. Justin watched them from afar. He had a plan on his mind and he wasn’t going to leave until it was done.

“So, what the fuck is wrong with that kid?” Michael asked.

Brian arched a brow knowing that Michael was talking about Justin. “What kid?”

“Justin,” Michael told him. “Why doesn’t he leave you alone?”

“He didn’t know the rules. Now he does,” Brian told him and put his arms around Michael.

“It’s been a while since we danced,” Michael said.

Brian just nodded.

“Hi,” a red head said looking at Brian.

Michael rolled his eyes. Brian smiled at the guy and turned towards him. He whispered something and the trick nodded.

“I’ll see you later, Mikey,” Brian told him.

“Brian,” Michael whined.

Brian kept walking to the backroom. He walked with the trick and put his back to one of the walls. He undid his pants and smiled when the guy got on his knees.

“Get lost,” Justin said to the trick.

Brian frowned as he saw Justin. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Get lost,” Justin hissed and the trick sighed and moved away.

“What the fuck do you think you are doing?” Brian asked again, getting angry.

Justin got on his knees and smiled up at Brian. “He was in my spot.”

Brian smirked at how innocently Justin sounded. He caressed the blond’s face and waited. His eyes closed as Justin’s mouth covered his hard dick. “Fuck yes,” he had dreamed of Justin’s mouth.

Justin sucked Brian for a few seconds and then let him go. He licked all around Brian’s cock and sucked the brunet’s sac into his mouth. With his hand, he jerked Brian off. Brian opened his eyes and looked down at the blond. He grabbed Justin by the hair and pulled the blond’s head back. He took his cock and with the head of his cock outlined Justin’s lips.

Justin licked his lips. “So good,” he whispered.

Brian smiled and pushed his cock inside the hot mouth. He closed his eyes and let the blond take control. Justin pushed a finger inside of his mouth getting it wet. He pulled it out and traced it around Brian’s balls and then to his asshole. He pushed inside as he started to deep throat the older man. Then he pushed another finger inside and brushed against Brian’s prostrate.

“Fuck,” Brian squeezed Justin’s shoulder and came hard.

Justin moaned around Brian’s cock and swallowed the brunet’s cum. When he was finished he got up and smiled. “As good as always,” he leaned forward and kissed Brian.

Brian wrapped his arms around Justin's waist and couldn’t wait to take him home and fuck the shit out of him. Then Justin pulled away and he looked at the smaller man with questioning eyes.

“I’ll leave so you can spend more time with your friends,” Justin turned around and quickly left.

Brian grunted in frustration as he did his pants. He followed Justin out of the backroom and looked around. He searched for the blond, trying to pretend like he was just on the prowl. He never found him and spent the rest of the night with a bemused smiled on his face. Justin was surely different from the rest and was going to drive him crazy; nonetheless, he made up his mind not to let Justin back into his life.

***

_That kinda lovin' makes me wanna pull down the shade, yeah  
That kinda lovin' yeah, now I'm never gonna be the same_

“Hey, Brian,” Justin said smiling as the bartender gave him his beer.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Michael asked. “Are you planning on showing up every night?”

“It’s a free country,” Justin smiled. “I came to see Brian, not you, so it’s not your fucking business.”

“Ha, he has a sense of humor,” Ted quipped as he rolled his eyes.

Brian smirked and turned to look at the blond.

“Want to get out of here?” Justin asked.

Brian stayed silent, thinking about it.

Michael looked at Brian and smiled when Brian didn’t move away. “Brian is not going to leave just because you want to,” Michael was sure of what he was saying.

Justin laughed in Michael’s face. “Shut the fuck up,” he looked at Brian who pretended like he was ignoring him.

Emmett looked at Ted with a raised brow. “Is it me or are they, like, fighting over Brian.”

“Oh, is not just you,” Ted answered as he watched Justin and Michael.

“You shut the fuck up,” Michael told him. “Who do you think you are?”

Justin ignored Michael. “Brian, are you coming or not?”

“He’s not!” Michael hissed.

“Then I guess I will have to find someone else to fuck,” Justin shrugged. “Maybe it will even be someone that can speak for himself.”

Brian rolled his eyes. Emmett and Ted smiled at the comment.

“Well, you do that. Brian is a top so you are barking up the wrong tree!” Michael almost barked.

“I know,” Justin nodded as he put the beer on the bar. “But you should hear him scream when I fuck him. He makes an excellent bottom boy,” he said it just to get on Michael’s nerves.

“What?!” Michael yelled.

Brian closed his eyes briefly and then glared at Justin.

“Oh, I went deaf. Did I?” Ted looked at Emmett whose mouth was hanging open.

“You are lying!” Michael screeched.

“What the fuck is it to you?” Justin asked. “You guys are just friends. If we fuck each other silly, it's none of your goddamn business.”

“And who the fuck are you?!” Michael was beyond mad.

“I’m the guy he fucks more than once,” he laughed at Michael’s face and then looked at Brian. “Later.”

Brian watched him walked away and then noticed his friends were staring at him. “What?”

“How could you let him fuck you?” Michael asked.

“How is that any of your fucking business, Mikey?” Brian asked for a shot of Beam.

“Every gay man that’s a top likes it to get it up the ass sometimes,” Emmett pointed out then he smirked at Brian and winked.

Brian looked heavenward. Ted shrugged and then nodded.

“I’m your best friend, Brian,” Michael pointed out.

“Yes. And since I don’t make it a habit to stick my dick up your ass, I don’t see how it’s any of your business whose cock is up mine,” Brian hissed and drank his shot before he moved away.

Michael stayed there pouting.

Emmett shook his head and watched as Brian went to the backroom. He looked at Justin who was dancing on the floor and wondered if he would get to see Justin and Brian together again. He had seen them before and he thought they made a cute couple. “Forget about it, Michael.”

“Fuck it,” Justin said as he danced with a trick and thought about what had happened.

Brian was in the backroom trying to forget what had happened as well. But every time he came out for a drink, he would watch Justin.

Justin looked at his watch and sighed. It was late and he had to be up early the next day. He had been dancing for hours trying to blow off steam. Michael just got on his nerves so badly. He left Babylon and walked over to his Jeep. He took his leather jacket and threw it in the back. He was about to walk to the driver’s side when someone grabbed him and turned him around.

“You had no fucking right!” Brian hissed.

Justin smirked and pushed Brian away. “Fuck off!” He took two steps away from Brian when the brunet screamed at him.

“Are you listening to me?” Brian was so fucking angry.

Justin turned around and stared at Brian. “It happened, Brian,” he knew exactly why Brian was so mad. “I am not going to lie for you or anyone.”

Brian frowned knowing it was true; still, he didn’t want his friends to know that he had bottomed for someone, let alone someone who looked like a twink. “You didn’t have to say anything either.”

Justin shook his head not knowing why the fuck he was still there. He walked over to the passenger’s side and opened the door. “Get in.”

Brian just stood where he was.

“I don’t live my life to make anyone happy but myself. I live however I fucking want to and fuck you if you don’t like it,” Justin arched a brow. “So you can get in and we’ll go home and fuck the shit out of each other or you can get lost.”

Brian walked over to Justin and glared. “You don’t tell me what to fucking do.”

“I know that,” Justin said.

Brian grabbed Justin’s neck, letting his thumb caress the blond’s jaw. “You won’t fuck me again unless I ask you.”

Justin smirked and got on his tip toes. “You’ll be begging for it by the end of the night,” he kissed Brian roughly and then pulled back.

Brian smirked and kissed him hard knowing that the blond was probably right. He got in the car, wondering what the fuck he was doing.

Justin smiled and walked to the driver's side. He got in and looked over at Brian, wondering what was it about the brunet that got him so crazed.

Brian didn’t have any idea what the fuck he was getting into but he just couldn’t pull away from Justin and he couldn't explain why.


	2. Just Fucking

_Say you got something  
that makes you feel good_

Cynthia knocked on the door and then walked in. “Brian, your father is here,” she raised a brow and waited to see what he wanted to do.

Brian sighed. “Send him in,” he moved some files around to pretend he was busy so his father would leave as soon as possible.

Jack came inside and looked at Cynthia as she closed he door. He looked at his son and slowly walked over to the chair. “Hey, Sonny Boy.”

“Hey, Dad,” Brian looked at his father. “What’s wrong?”

Jack stared at his son, saying nothing.

“Look, I am very busy here,” Brian told him. “If you need money, just let me know how much you want.”

Jack shook his head. “It’s not that.”

“Is it Joan?” Brian sighed wondering what she had done now. His father always came to him when he was in need of something like money or solving his problems with his mother.

“No,” Jack told him shaking his head. He looked at the floor, not knowing where to start. All he wanted to do was make sure that what they had told him wasn’t true. But he had a really bad feeling in his gut.

“What do you want, Dad?” Brian asked looking worried.

“One...one of my friends saw you,” Jack told him. “Jesus.”

“Good to know he is not blind,” Brian joked. “Saw me what?”

Jack frowned. “He saw you kissing a guy,” he looked at his son, wanting him to deny everything.

“Well, fuck me,” Brian couldn’t believe it. He looked at his father, not knowing what to tell him. He had always believed that it was none of his father’s business if he liked guys. He also thought that he would never have had to tell him.

“Tell me is not true,” Jack demanded.

“I can’t do that, Dad,” Brian looked at his desk. He took a deep breath and let it go.

“Why the fuck not?” Jack asked raising his voice.

Brian sighed and nodded. “It’s true, Jack; I’m gay. What I don’t understand is how your friend saw me. He must go to the same places I do.”

Jack frowned, thinking about that and then realized what his son had just admitted. He stood up angrily. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

Brian got up too. “I’m a fag, Dad. That’s what I am talking about.”

Jack shook his head. “It can’t be. Stop joking around.”

Brian walked around the counter and towards his father. “I’m not joking.”

Jack made two fists.

“I would think better if I were you,” Brian said dryly. “I might be gay, but I won’t take any abuse from you, Dad. Not anymore, I'm not a little boy.”

Jack was furious. “You are a disgrace to the family.”

Brian’s heart was crushed. He walked away from his father and toward the door. “I’m very busy Dad. Just go.”

Jack walked to the door with every intention of leaving then he stopped and looked at his son. “You are shit! You won’t ever have anything! Do you hear me, Sonny Boy! I knew your mother should have gotten that abortion when I told her,” Jack yelled.

“Look at the facts Jack,” Brian spat out. “I am the one that supports you and Joan. I have something to show for myself. What the fuck do you have but a mouth to ask me for things? Get the fuck out of my office!” Brian hissed. He had never been so mad in his life.

Jack shook his head and left the office.

Cynthia came running to see what had happened. “Brian, are you okay?” she asked worried. She stared at Brian who was standing in his office holding the door knob and looking at the floor. “Brian.”

Brian’s head snap up to look at Cynthia. “I’m okay.”

Cynthia nodded and watched him go to his desk and sit down. She went back out and decided to ask what had happened later. Brian stayed in his office, trying to focus on his work, but it wasn’t working. After awhile, he looked at his watch and saw he had lost two hours doing nothing but thinking about his father’s words. He reached for the phone and told Cynthia to come into his office.

“What’s going on, Brian?” Cynthia asked.

“I'm leaving. Cancel everything I have for the day,” Brian told her as he got up.

“But...” Cynthia saw the look that Brian sent her way and she just nodded and walked out of the office.

Brian grabbed his things and was out of there. He needed to get out of the office and relax. He got in the ‘vette and drove away from his agency with no destination in mind, or so he thought. But when he parked the car and looked around, he saw the sign with big red letters that said Myers Inc. He sighed and got out. Then he walked inside the office and towards the girl at reception. “Hi.”

“Hello, may I help you?” Maria asked as she looked at Brian.

“Yeah, I want to see someone that works here. His name is Justin Taylor,” Brian rolled his lips inside his mouth while she checked some papers.

“Mr. Taylor is in a meeting right now,” she told him smiling. “But you can wait for him. It will be just a few more minutes. Do you have an appointment?”

Brian shook his head. “I’m a friend of his. Brian Kinney.”

Maria jotted it down. “I’ll tell him as soon as he gets out.”

Brian nodded and went to sit down. He grabbed a magazine and started reading. Minutes later, just like Maria had said, Justin was done. Maria announced Brian’s presence to the blond and Justin didn’t waste any time when he knew Brian was waiting for him.

“Hey. You don’t look too good,” Justin told him.

Brian closed the magazine and put it on the coffee table. “I'm having a bad day. I look better that you though.”

Justin nodded. “My day is not going as planned. And you only look better because you're wearing Armani.”

Brian smiled and nodded. He looked around not knowing what else to say.

Justin stood in front of Brian, not saying a thing either. He could see that Brian was really stressed out. “You want to get out of here?”

“Yeah,” Brian told him without hesitating.

They left together not saying anything, just giving each other the company and support they needed from one another at the moment. Going to Justin’s apartment was faster so they opted for that.

“I like this place,” Brian said as he did a 360 degrees turn. “It’s you.”

Justin smiled. “That might be because I decorated it.”

Brian put his hands on his hips and stared at the blond. “Show me the bedroom.”

Justin smiled and walked towards his bedroom knowing that Brian was following him. He stopped in front of his bed once he was inside. He smiled when Brian hugged him from behind and started kissing his neck. He turned around and undid Brian’s tie.

“This doesn’t mean anything,” Brian said. “Just...fucking.”

“I know that,” Justin told him and turned them around. He let the tie drop to the floor.

“Good,” Brian hugged Justin tightly and kissed him with fury. He didn’t know why but it felt so freeing to have Justin in his arms. It was better than any drug he had even had.

Justin made his way down to Brian’s neck. He licked Brian’s Adam’s apple making the brunet shudder. He smiled and then pulled back to have enough space to take Brian’s shirt off.

“You smell good,” Brian muttered as he inhaled the scent from Justin’s hair.

Justin caressed the taller man’s face. He liked having Brian around for some reason. “I am going to fuck you so hard.”

Brian clenched his ass and laughed shortly. He couldn’t believe the effect the blond had on him. He wanted Justin to take control. He was glad that he could let go knowing that Justin wouldn’t see him differently if he gave up the power he liked to hold.

“Just relax,” Justin said. “Let me please you.”

Brian closed his eyes as Justin pushed him back in the bed. He smiled and watched as Justin got rid of his own clothes. Brian pushed his pants down and got rid of his shoes and socks.

“What happened to you?” Justin asked as he straddled the brunet. “Tell me.”

Brian was about to tell Justin that it was none of his business but just shrugged and told him. “My father came to visit.”

“Say no more,” Justin whispered as he leaned forth and kissed Brian on the forehead. “I understand.”

Brian searched inside the blond’s eyes and saw that it was true. He let his hand caress Justin’s cheek and then pulled him roughly towards him. “Fuck me and stop wasting so much time.”

Justin smirked and reached for a condom.

Brian watched in silence as the blond prepared him. He closed his eyes and gave in to the sensation. “God.”

Justin was on his knees with Brian’s legs wrapped tightly around his waist. He stared at Brian for a few seconds and his hands roamed Brian’s chest. He was staring at Brian’s face not sure what he was looking for but as soon as Brian opened his eyes, he closed his. His hips started to move on their own volition and he wondered if he had waited just a little more what Brian eyes would have showed him.

“Fuck!” Brian moaned and gripped the sheets. He couldn’t believe that Justin already knew what to do to drive him wild.

Justin smiled and started to nibble on Brian’s chest. He heard Brian moaning and was pleased. Hearing Brian moan like that for him made him even harder. He pinched the brunet’s right nipple and as a reward Brian, squeezed him. “Oh yeah.”

“Go faster,” Brian grunted.

Justin put a hand behind Brian’s neck and placed the other one on the bed for leverage. He looked at Brian and kissed the brunet hard. His tongue burying itself as deep as it could in Brian’s mouth.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed as Justin pounded into him.

“So good,” Justin grunted as he pushed hard against the brunet rubbing his prostate. He knew how close Brian already was.

Brian’s body was dripping with sweat. His heart was pounding fast inside his ribcage. He opened his eyes and stared at the blond for a brief moment before his eyes closed again. He felt the tell-tell sign in his balls and his body arched up from the bed when Justin grabbed his cock.

Justin sucked on Brian’s neck and then the body beneath him shook with intense force. “Oh fuck,” he groaned as Brian triggered his orgasm. He rode the body until he poured out everything he had.

“You are pretty good,” Brian told him trying to catch his breath.

Justin laughed and put his forehead against Brian’s. “You think?”

Brian lowered his legs and Justin pulled out carefully.

“I need to get cleaned up,” Brian told him.

“You can take a shower,” Justin said and threw the used condom in the trash.

“Right,” Brian got up and stretched.

Justin was watching him. He was memorizing every bit to paint later. There was no doubt that Brian was great inspiration for him.

“What?” Brian asked.

Justin shook his head. “Nothing,” he pointed. “The bathroom is through there.”

Brian disappeared through the door. He took a quick shower. When he came out, Justin was there with a towel. Justin took a shower next. Brian walked back to the bedroom to get dressed.

“Just fucking leave,” Brian told himself as he sat on the bed. He was listening to the water fall. He didn’t know what he was still doing there.

“Hey,” Justin said as he dried off. He looked around and noticed that Brian’s clothes were still on the floor. He sat next to the brunet and dried his hair.

“You are all wet,” Brian muttered.

Justin nodded and lifted one of his legs onto the bed so he could sit looking at Brian. He reached out and pulled Brian’s face towards him. “Kiss me.”

Brian just leaned forward and did. They kissed for a long while before Brian realized that he was on his back with Justin on top of him.

“I have to go,” Brian muttered.

Justin smiled and just moved to the side a little bit. Half of his body was still lying on top of Brian.

Brian didn’t move away. Justin waited and rolled his eyes. He moved to grab his cigarettes from the night stand and lit one for Brian.

Brian took the cigarette and stared at the ceiling.

“You know,” Justin took a drag of his cigarette. “You make me feel good.”

Brian scoffed and threw an arm across his eyes. He sighed when he felt Justin’s arm across his chest. Moving his arm away, he saw that Justin was just making patterns on his chest. He just watched and didn’t say a thing because having Justin’s touch him made him feel pretty good too.

***

_But I got what I came for_  
And I'll do it 'til I drop  
You do what you want to do  
I ain't never gonna stop 

Justin reached the bar and smiled at Brian. “What are you doing?”

Brian lifted his drink not saying anything.

“Want to dance?” Justin asked.

Brian shook his head and looked at a guy that stopped next to him. He whispered something to Brian and the brunet smirked. Justin smiled and asked for a drink. He stayed there for a while just looking at a guy that was dancing and flirting with him.

“We can dance now,” Brian said as he wrapped his arms around Justin from behind.

Justin pulled away and shook his head. “Now I’m busy,” he walked towards the dance floor and the trick he had been watching.

Brian glared in Justin’s direction and then turned his back on him. He just thought that Justin could go fuck himself. He wasn’t up for any games.

Michael arrived an hour later and went straight for the bar where Emmett and Ted where. “Hey, guys.”

“Hey,” Ted said but didn’t look at him.

“What are you guys doing?” Michael asked.

“Watching Brian and Justin,” Emmett told him. “It’s been going for quite a while.”

“What has?” Michael asked.

“I don’t know. I think…they are having some kind of competition. So far the two of them had been to the backroom three times,” Emmett shrugged. “I don’t know what’s going on with Brian and Justin.”

“Nothing is going on with them,” Michael said. “Justin just wants to take Brian’s place. That’s all. But he can’t do that. This is Brian’s kingdom.”

“Well, not forever,” Ted pointed out. “And tonight has been an eye opening experience. The kid can act just like Brian. Plus he has youth on his side.”

Michael rolled his eyes. He went to find Brian and saw him dancing with some guy. “Hey.”

Brian looked at Michael and smiled. “Hey, Mikey.”

“Can we talk?” Michael asked.

“Not now, Mikey,” Brian told him.

“Brian, come on,” Michael whined.

The trick move closer to the brunet and whispered something.

“Later,” Brian followed the trick and was going down the stairs when Justin was coming up with a trick.

“Hey, stud,” Justin said smiling. “See ya later.”

Brian stopped walking and turned around. He followed Justin and once they were out of Babylon, he grabbed him by the shoulders.

“What the fuck?” Justin asked and then saw Brian. He just smiled. “What is it?”

“What are you playing at?” Brian asked.

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” Justin told him.

The trick stood behind Justin and looked at Brian and the blond. “Are we leaving or what? Is he going to join us? I have no problems with that,” the trick smiled sexily at Brian.

Justin looked at him and then at Brian. He smirked and shrugged. If Brian wanted to come with them, it wasn’t a problem. “Are you coming because if you aren’t then leave me the fuck alone. I’m busy,” he turned to leave but wasn’t able to.

Brian grabbed him hard by the arm. He turned him around and they came face to face.

Justin glared at Brian. “What the fuck do you want?”

“Just to tell you to stop fucking with me,” Brian spat out. “I want you out of my life. So, don’t come back here.”

“I’m not doing anything to you,” Justin told him dryly. “Oh, I get it. Because I am not at your beck and call, you got mad. Well, I am not your little toy, Brian. What’s your fucking problem anyway?”

Brian smirked. “You never came here this much before. All this time, you have been coming after me,” he looked at the trick who was behind Justin. “So go to wherever the fuck you came from because I don’t want you anymore. I’m done with you.”

“Can handle competition, old man?” Justin asked, smiling crookedly at Brian. “I can be wherever the fuck I want to be. It happens that I tried the other clubs and I liked this one the best. I come here for the tricks and now that I have what I want, I'm leaving for the night.”

“Yeah, I saw you,” Brian told him.

“I saw you too,” Justin said. “You know what I think it is. You can’t keep up anymore and you know I can.”

“Fuck you,” Brian hissed.

“Sorry that you can’t keep up anymore,” Justin smirked. “Old man.”

Brian pushed him away, hard.

Justin hit the trick’s chest. He steadied himself and walked over to Brian. “I feel sorry for you.”

“The feeling is mutual,” Brian told him dryly.

Justin smirked and walked away with the trick.

Brian went back inside to the bar and to find a trick of his own. He didn’t need the blond before and he surely didn’t need him now.

***

_Man I need another fix  
I'll never have to kiss the bride_

Justin opened his door and sighed when he saw his father. His life was nothing but bad luck over and over again.

“Can I come in?” Craig asked.

“You are already here. You might as well,” Justin moved away from the door and went to his studio.

Craig closed the door and followed his son. “When did you come back?”

Justin sat down and picked up his brush. He looked at his father and shrugged. “About three months ago.”

Craig nodded. “Your mom told me just the other day.”

“I see,” Justin looked back at his father. “What do you want?”

“We need to talk,” Craig was serious.

“About what?” Justin put his things down and stood up.

“Your future,” Craig told him.

“Not this again,” Justin protested. “I've already made my life, Dad.”

“This is no life, Justin.” Craig shook his head. “What can you do? Paint pretty pictures.”

Justin’s jaw tightened.

“What about a family, Justin?” Craig asked getting desperate. He wanted Justin to understand. “You'll never have kids this way. You can’t live life like this, Justin,” Craig told his son.

“How is that, father?” Justin asked mockingly. “As an artist or as a gay man?”

“Both!” Craig told him. “You are never going to amount to anything!”

“Well, you are so fucking wrong!” Justin hissed. “I can amount to a lot. I’m a great artist, Dad.”

“Fine!” Craig said sighing. “You are, but...”

“But what?” Justin crossed his arms. “I’m still gay? Too fucking bad for you. It really doesn’t affect me in the least.”

Craig made two fists as he tried to control his anger.

“What, Dad?” Justin squared his shoulders. “Are you going to hit me...again?”

“Don’t you want a normal life, Justin? Someone who loves you?” Craig was running out of things to say.

Justin was so angry. “I can be loved just as well if I'm gay.”

Craig shook his head. “I don’t know, Justin, all this time you have been alone; no one by your side.”

Justin looked away. “That’s because I don’t need anyone.”

“Sure, Justin. You tell yourself that,” Craig turned around to leave. “I just want what is best for you.”

Justin stayed in his studio, trying to control his nerves. When he heard the door close, he kneeled on the floor and his tears made it out. His father wasn’t right. He could be loved if he allowed it. He got up, determined not to let his father get to him. He went to his room and grabbed his wooden box and then moved to the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of Daniel’s and sat down on the sofa. “Fuck it all,” he took a shot directly from the bottle.

The phone rang and Justin grunted but picked it up.

“Honey, are you there? It’s me; your mother,” Jennifer said. “Please.”

“What do you want?” Justin asked.

“I just wanted to see how you were doing,” Jennifer sighed. “I told your father where you are living. Has he been there?”

Justin drank from the bottle. “No,”

Jennifer smiled. “Well, he might come by there to talk to you. You know he loves you.”

“Mom, I have to go,” Justin closed his eyes. “I’m working on a painting.”

“Okay. I love you,” Jennifer hung up.

Justin sighed and threw the phone on the sofa. He grabbed his wooden box and opened it. He took out a blunt and a lighter. He just wanted to forget about everything for a few hours; wanted to forget about his father and his mother, Brian and even himself.

***

_We never change do we?_  
No, no, no, no.  
We never learn do we?  
No, no, no, no. 

“Look who it is,” Justin drawled as he washed his hands.

Brian ignored Justin and went to pee. Justin stared at Brian in the mirror. When the brunet was done, he walked over to the sinks. He stared back at Justin but didn’t say anything. When he was about to leave, Justin finally spoke.

“So, your majesty,” Justin said. “Am I allowed to be in the diner? I don’t want you to have a fit because I am here too.”

Brian turned around and walked over to Justin. He was just inches away from the blond’s mouth. “Don’t you have someone else to bother?”

“Don’t you have something better to say?” Justin wasn’t backing away.

“You are...” But nothing else came out of Brian’s mouth.

“What?” Justin asked.

Brian grabbed Justin by the neck and pushed him hard against the wall. Justin grunted a little bit when his head hit the tile. But his eyes never wavered from Brian’s own. Brian kissed him hard. His tongue and teeth attacked Justin’s mouth.

Justin’s hand quickly went to free Brian’s cock. He got hold on the brunet’s growing erection and moaned when Brian did the same. He pulled away and smirked. “Fuck me.”

Brian dragged him into one of the stalls. Justin pulled away from Brian long enough to lock the door. Then they were kissing each other hard and fast; as if they just a few minutes left on earth.

“What are you waiting for?” Justin asked as he undid his pants.

Brian reached for a condom inside his pocket then he pushed his jeans down farther. Justin did the same and turned around. Brian ripped the condom open and put it on.

“Hurry up,” Justin demanded.

Brian pushed Justin’s upper body forwards and made him open his legs a little more. Then he rammed inside the blond’s hole.

“Shit!” Justin hissed as the pain hit him.

Brian didn't give him time to adjust. “Not so cocky now,” he spat out.

Justin closed his eyes and moved his hips. He gripped Brian hard against him and Brian shouted. “Now I am,” he gasped out.

Brian smiled and held on to Justin’s hips. He moved his hips fast and hard. He was still thinking about what had happened that night at Babylon. He didn’t know why, but it made him angry.

Justin was buckling back to meet Brian’s every thrust. “Fuck me!” Justin gasped out as Brian pounded into him. “Yes!”

Brian grunted as he felt his balls slapping against Justin. Then it was all over in a matter of seconds. Justin was splashing his cum against the stall door and Brian was pouring his seed in the condom. They stood still for a few seconds.

“Ah,” Justin grunted when Brian pulled away.

Brian frowned, not sure what the hell was going on. Justin was becoming a constant fix in his life. He was sure of that. He watched as the blond got dressed and wondered what it was about him. Justin was like no one he had ever met before.

“What?” Justin asked. “Are you still mad at me?”

“I wasn’t mad at you,” Brian commented.

“Right,” Justin drawled but didn’t believe a single word. “Good.”

They walked out of the stall and fixed their clothes while looking in the mirror.

“Well,” Justin said as he came close to Brian. He inhaled deeply and smirked. “Maybe I was wrong. You're not that old.”

Brian looked at the blond but didn’t say a word.

“Later,” Justin told him. “Maybe we’ll see each other tonight at Babylon.”

Brian half-laughed. “Later.”

Justin kissed Brian’s neck and then he was gone. Brian looked himself in the mirror again and sighed. He had watched the blond walk out and knew something had to be done before he lost his mind. He chuckled at the whole situation. If he hadn't known any better, he would say that they were acting like a couple who just had some make up sex, but he didn’t want to know any better.

***

_And you can't stop messin' with it  
All your life you've been so misunderstood_

Brian got out of the backroom after having been sucked off and went straight to the bar. Minutes later Justin was by his side, having come from the same place. Brian looked at him and smiled. He liked Justin because they were so much alike. Justin understood him; not many people did.

“Hello,” Ted said standing next to Justin. “How are you guys doing?”

“Great fucking so far,” Justin licked his lips. “But you wouldn’t know anything about that?”

Brian laughed. Ted frowned and didn’t say anything.

Justin threw his arm around Ted. “You should grow some balls and at least defend yourself.”

“Fuck you,” Ted hissed.

Justin smirked. “That’s much better,” he turned towards Brian and smiled. “Buy me a beer.”

Brian nodded and Justin kissed him hard on the lips. Then he was gone to the dance floor. Brian watched him for a few seconds and then turned towards the bartender.

“I thought you said you already had him,” Ted pointed out.

“Mind your own business, Theodore,” Brian grabbed the two beers and walked to where Justin was.

Emmett and Michael came into the club and saw Ted. They smiled at each other and kissed when they got to the bar.

“What are you doing here all alone?” Emmett asked.

“I was with Brian but then Justin came in and Brian ran off with him,” Ted pointed towards Brian and Justin who where dancing.

Emmett smiled when he saw them while Michael glared.

Michael didn’t think twice as he made his way to Brian. “Hey.”

Brian looked at Michael. “Hey, Mikey.”

“Hiya, Mikey,” Justin smirked.

Michael glared at the blond then turned to Brian. “I want to dance with you.”

Justin rolled his eyes.

“Right now?” Brian asked.

“Let’s go to the backroom,” Justin said as his hand made it to Brian’s sac. “What do you say?”

Michael frowned and glared at the blond.

Brian looked at Michael and smiled. “I’ll dance with you later.”

Michael stayed there fuming. He turned around and went back to the bar.

“You two are acting like kids,” Brian pointed out as he pushed Justin against the wall.

Justin smiled. “Guess that makes you the toy.”

Brian scoffed and kissed Justin’s neck as he undid the smaller man’s pants.

“Suck me,” Justin told him.

Brian looked around and frowned.

“Go ahead,” Justin said. “I dare you.”

Brian got on his knees slowly and then looked up at Justin. They smiled at each other and then Brian kissed Justin’s skin just above his pubes. He was already lost in Justin’s sweet scent. His tongue started to lick Justin all around. Then his mouth kissed the base of Justin’s cock and his tongue peaked out to lick Justin’s sac.

“Brian,” Justin grabbed his cock and started jerking himself.

Brian sucked Justin’s balls into his mouth. He sucked on them gently while one of his hands reached Justin’s hole and a finger went inside. Justin arched his hips and started panting as he got closer to his orgasm. Brian pulled back and stopped Justin from touching himself.

“Suck me,” Justin hissed. “Now.”

Brian gripped Justin’s hips hard. “Don’t tell me what to do.”

Justin smiled and grabbed Brian’s hair. He pulled back hard and they started at each other. Both of them let go at the same time. Brian smirked and licked the head of Justin’s cock.

“Ah,” Justin groaned. “Fuck.”

Brian was so fucking hard, he was going to explode. He took Justin’s cock in his mouth completely. He worked the blond quickly, knowing exactly what would drive Justin over the edge.

“Oh, god!” Justin grabbed Brian’s shoulder and then his body convulsed with pleasure.

Brian pulled back and licked his lips while he swallowed. He watched the blond and smirked. “Another satisfied customer,” he laughed at that.

Justin took in deep breaths as he tried to relax. His hand pushed Brian’s hair back and he smiled at the brunet. Brian got up and kissed Justin in the lips and pulled back. They laughed briefly and then kissed once again. This time Brian pushed his tongue inside of Justin’s mouth, letting the blond taste his cum in his mouth.

Justin pulled back and his hand went to open Brian’s jeans. “I want to taste something else,” he got on his knees quickly and in seconds Brian’s whole cock was in his mouth.

“Yes,” Brian gasped as he pushed his hips back and forth. His hands were resting in the wall and his head was thrown back in pleasure. “Get up.”

Justin stopped what he was doing and looked confused for a second. Then he got up and he was quickly turned around. He put his hands on the wall and braced himself for when Brian pushed inside of him. “Mmm.”

“I like fucking you,” Brian said as he grabbed Justin by the front of the neck.

“Yeah,” Justin grunted as he pushed back. He gasped for air as Brian fucked him fast. His body vibrated each time the brunet penetrated him over and over again.

“God,” Brian grunted as he came hard. He held onto Justin’s lithe body and kissed him when all his senses where back together.

Justin turned his head to the side and didn’t say a word. Brian leaned forward and kissed him on the neck and then searched for the blond’s mouth. He pulled away slowly and took off the condom never breaking the kiss.

“Another satisfied customer,” Justin drawled smirking.

Brian laughed as he did his pants.

Justin pulled his pants up and looked around. Everyone was looking at them. He gave them a blinding smile. “Envy me, boys,” he laughed.

Brian watched the blond walking away from him and shook his head. He couldn’t believe that Justin could be so cocky.

Justin stopped and turned around to look at Brian. “Coming? I'm going to get something to drink,” Justin told him.

Brian nodded and followed the blond. When they got to the bar, the guys were there.

“Hey,” Emmett said to Justin. “So you have plans of sticking around.”

Justin laughed and nodded. “How can you tell?”

Emmett smiled and threw his arm around the blond’s shoulder. “The way I see it is that Brian wants you and you want him back,” he whispered. “Why would you want to go?”

Justin laughed and just nodded as he asked for a beer. Arching a brow at Michael, who was glaring at him, was fun. It was hilarious that the man didn’t like him. Brian ordered a drink and watched the dance floor although what he really was doing was looking at Justin’s ass.

“Want to dance?” Michael asked.

“Not now,” Brian told him.

Justin smiled and walked in front of Brian. He smirked in Michael’s direction and then kissed the brunet passionately. “Mmm, so good.”

Brian smirked and nodded. He took a sip of his drink and then, pulling Justin close, he passed it to the blond’s mouth.

“Hot,” Justin whispered after swallowing and laughed.

Michael was fuming. He wished he could close his eyes and when he opened them Justin wouldn’t be there.

“I think you two are a great couple,” Emmett smiled.

Michael opened his eyes wide. He was furious. “Brian doesn’t do relationships,” he hissed.

“I am seeing otherwise,” Ted commented.

“It’s not a relationship,” Justin looked at Michael. “It’s just fucking...a lot of fucking.”

Brian drank his shot and looked at Justin. “Yeah.”

Justin smirked and took his beer. He took a sip and turned around to look at the dance floor. Then he gave his beer to Ted and walked onto the dance floor. Brian just stayed by the bar, drinking and watching the blond.

“What’s going on?” Michael asked.

“With what?” Brian asked.

“With you,” Michael hissed. “What are you still doing with him?”

Emmett looked at Ted who just shook his head not wanting to say anything. “Michael,” Emmett said. “Want to dance?”

“No,” Michael shouted. “I’m talking to Brian.”

Brian sighed and knew Michael wasn't going to drop the issue.

“Do you love him?” Michael asked.

“What?” Brian laughed and shook his head.

“Why haven’t you sent him away?” Michael asked almost desperate. “You already fucked him and...he fucked you! What else do you want with him?”

“That’s none of your business,” Brian said. “So fucking drop the issue, Mikey.”

“Wow,” Ted mouthed to Emmett.

“Come on,” Emmett said grabbing Michael’s arm. “Let’s go dancing. I want to dance.”

Michael was glaring at Brian as Emmett pulled him away. He couldn’t understand what Brian was playing at. Ted put his drink down and went with them. He knew they had to calm Michael down.

“Hey,” Justin smiled. “Having a good time?” he asked when he finally came back half an hour later. He had noticed that Michael and Brian had been talking heatedly to each other, but he wasn’t going to ask. His brain had done the math and he knew they were talking about him.

Brian nodded.

“You haven’t moved from here,” Justin pointed out.

Brian smirked. “Don’t worry about me. You are having enough fun for the both of us.”

Justin smiled and wrapped his arms around Brian’s waist. He licked Brian’s neck and then grabbed the brunet’s beer. He took a sip before Brian took the bottle away.

“Can’t you buy your own?” Brian asked raising a brow.

“Yours always tastes better,” Justin’s hand went to Brian’s hip. Then it moved slowly and grabbed one of Brian’s ass cheeks.

Brian arched a brow.

Justin smiled and undid the brunet’s black jeans. Then he scurried his hand through the back and tracked Brian’s crack. “I want to fuck you.”

Brian didn’t say anything. He smirked and kissed Justin. He let his tongue slip in and they fought for control. Justin slipped a finger inside the brunet and Brian moaned. Then his other hand grabbed Brian’s hard cock.

“Are you two going to fuck here?” Emmett asked suddenly.

Justin pulled his hand away slowly from Brian’s ass so Emmett wouldn’t see what he just had been doing to the brunet. Brian put his beer on the bar and slapped Justin’s hand away from his cock. Then he zipped his pants. Justin moved away and grabbed the beer. Emmett was smirking while Michael was glaring at Justin. Ted really didn’t care either way.

“What is he still doing here?” Michael asked.

“Having a good time, Mikey,” Justin smiled and took a sip of Brian’s beer.

Brian ordered a shot of beam.

“Well, you should leave,” Michael spat out. “And the name is Michael.”

“Come on, Michael,” Emmett put an arm around Michael. “Relax.”

Brian whispered on his ear. “Want to go to the loft?”

Justin looked at Brian and smiled widely. He just nodded. Brian looked at him with lust in his eyes. He wanted Justin so much.

“It’s was a pleasure seeing you guys again,” Justin said putting the empty bottle down.

Brian paid for their drinks and turned to put his arm around Justin’s shoulder. They walked out of Babylon together, not sure why they couldn’t keep away from one another.

Emmett turned to Ted and Michael with a smile on his face. “Justin gives him that blinding smile that could make anyone fall down to his knees and Brian looks at him with that look that can make anyone melt. But you know...it’s just fucking.”

Ted laughed.

“What are you talking about?” Michael asked.

Emmett rolled his eyes and turned to look at Michael. “Want to dance some more?” he asked knowing that Michael just didn’t want to see it.

Michael nodded and went with his friend. He was a little sad that Brian hadn't stayed and he blamed Justin for it. But he was going to find a way to make Justin leave them alone.


	3. There When You Need Me

_Just a little kiss on the lips  
And I was on my knees_

Justin walked inside Babylon and spotted Michael right away. “Hey.”

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Michael asked.

“You know,” Justin said smirking. “You might as well buy a gun and shoot me. I’m not going anywhere.”

Michael grimaced. “Like I would bother with you, I’m not worried. Brian is going to dump you soon enough. He’ll get tired of you eventually.”

Justin shrugged. “Everything must come to an end. So I guess you don’t have to worry about nothing.”

“You’re just...his fuck buddy,” Michael told him.

“I’m glad you can see how things work, Mikey,” Justin smiled and asked for a beer. “What are you worried about?”

“Nothing,” Michael told him quickly.

“Good,” Justin smiled at him. “All is settled.”

Michael sighed. “If you’re looking for Brian, he is in the backroom.”

Justin took a sip of his beer and smiled. He got closer to Michael and chuckled. “You need to get a life, Mikey. Be like me, mine doesn’t revolve around him.”

Michael frowned. “What do you mean?”

Justin shook his head. “I’m going to dance.”

Michael watched him go and sighed. Then he smiled, happy to know that Justin didn’t want Brian for anything other that fucking. He was sure to tell Brian what Justin had said.

“Why are you smiling like that?” Ted asked.

Michael shrugged. “I’m happy.”

“Okay,” Ted said. “Wasn’t Brian here with you?”

“He’s in the backroom,” Michael sighed. “He’ll be back.”

Ted nodded and then saw that Michael was staring at someone on the dance floor. He saw Justin laughing as Emmett danced with him. “Michael, can I ask you something?”

“What?” Michael asked taking a sip of his drink.

“Do you hate Justin?” Ted asked.

“What?” Michael asked in surprise.

“I know you don’t like him,” Ted said.

Michael frowned and kept quiet.

“Brian likes him a lot,” Ted pointed out.

“Shut up,” Michael grunted.

“Don’t you want Brian to be happy?” Ted asked.

Michael’s body froze. “But...it’s not going to be with Justin.”

“I see,” Ted swallowed hard. He wanted to ask Michael if it was supposed to be with him but didn’t. He turned towards the bartender and lifted his hand. He always asked for the same thing so the bartender knew exactly what he wanted.

“I’m going to talk with Emmett,” Michael said as he put the beer on the bar.

“Sweetie,” Emmett said kissing Michael on the cheek when Michael joined them. “Want to dance with us?”

“Not really,” Michael told him as he stared at Justin.

Justin rolled his eyes.

“Can I talk with you?” Michael asked not wanting to be there with Justin.

“Sure,” Emmett told him knowing that Michael was just trying to make Justin go away.

“I’m going to go,” Justin said knowing that Michael was being an asshole. “I think I’m going to the backroom and see what I find there.”

Michael shot daggers at him.

Justin searched for Brian in the back room. He found the brunet against the wall doing up his pants. “Hey.”

Brian arched a brow.

“Do you have any E?” Justin asked as he ran his fingers through his hair.

Brian nodded and took one out. He smiled and put it in his mouth. Justin eagerly went after the hit. They shared the E and then continued kissing.

“Let’s get a drink,” Brian told him.

Justin shook his head. “I want to fuck someone.”

Brian bit his lower lip. He didn’t think he could bottom for the blond where everyone would see them. He knew where to draw the line.

“Ah,” Justin said looking towards a couch where a guy was jerking off. “We found our prey.”

Brian turned to look at the trick. “We?” But he followed the blond nonetheless.

Justin laughed and sat next to the trick. “Hey.”

The trick looked at Justin and then at Brian. He turned his back to the armrest and closed his eyes as he threw his head back. He kept on jerking off and opened his legs to show Justin.

“I think that’s an invitation,” Justin said looking at Brian.

Brian scoffed as he watched Justin undo his pants. For a moment, he didn’t want the blond fucking the trick. He wanted to be at the loft fucking Justin.

Justin put a condom on and then reached for the tricks jeans. He finished pushing them down and got rid of them. He grabbed the tricks legs and placed them on his shoulder. “Lube,” he extended his hand at Brian.

Brian sighed as he gave his lube to the blond. He watched, fascinated, as Justin started to fuck the guy.

“He’s good,” Justin grunted.

“Yeah,” Brian said, about to turn around and leave.

Justin saw at Brian and knew he was about to go. “Hey,” he said. He moaned as he pushed into the trick. He smiled at Brian and extended his fist towards Brian. He opened the fist revealing a condom.

Brian looked down at the condom that the blond was offering. He took it and moved behind Justin.

“Hurry up,” Justin hissed.

Brian opened his jeans and pushed them down quickly to the middle of his thighs. He stroked himself twice and then put the condom on. He grabbed the lube that Justin had thrown on the couch and put a vast amount on his cock. Then, grabbing Justin’s hips, he positioned himself.

“Oh fuck!” Justin yelled as Brian penetrated him. “Yes,” he threw his head back. He was in heaven as the pleasure of Brian fucking him while he fucked some guy, coursed through him.

Brian grabbed Justin by his left shoulder and his right hip. He could hear the trick moaning while Justin just groaned. Brian started to kiss Justin’s neck as his hand moved down the blond’s back and then inside Justin’s shirt. He moved his hand up scratching the smooth skin.

“Fuck!” Justin hissed. He licked the sweat off his upper lip and opened his eyes briefly. He smiled seeing that they had an audience. He liked that a lot. He put his hands on the armrest and started moving faster.

Brian pulled his hands away and grabbed Justin’s hips with both hands. He felt Justin’s body shake from his orgasm. Then it was the trick and then himself. He pulled away quickly and got rid of the condom.

Justin pulled away and smiled at the trick. “You were really good.”

“Thanks,” the trick told him. “Maybe we can get together.”

Justin was getting rid of the condom when what the trick was saying registered. He looked at the trick who was just a teenager and he shook his head. “I don’t do boyfriends.”

“Why not?” the trick asked as he pulled his pants up.

“It’s just the way it is,” Justin told him as he pulled his pants up too.

The trick frowned. “Well, you’re with him.”

Justin looked at Brian and laughed. Brian didn’t find it so funny.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Justin told him. “It’s just fucking you know. Can you blame me? He’s Brian Kinney after all.”

The trick smiled and nodded. Justin moved closer and kissed the boy.

Brian was zipping his pants when he looked at Justin and saw him kissing the trick. He grabbed Justin by the arm and pulled him to him. “Let’s go.”

Justin laughed and nodded. He zipped his pants and followed the brunet out of the backroom.

“How many E’s did you take before mine?” Brian asked as he stopped to look at Justin’s eyes.

“Just one with Emmett,” Justin said and smirked. “And maybe two more before that.”

Brian shook his head. “Let’s get you some water.”

Justin stopped Brian by grabbing him by the arm. “I’m not some little, kid, Brian. I know my limit. When I need water I’ll get it for myself.”

Brian stared at the blond and just nodded.

“Good,” Justin said. “Now let’s get that drink.”

Brian followed him and didn’t know what he was feeling. A part of him wanted to slap Justin for being so rude but the other part felt more attracted to the blond.

“Hey, Mikey,” Brian said, kissing his friend on the cheek when they reached the bar.

Michael frowned when he received the kiss. Brian always kissed him on the mouth. He sighed thinking it was Justin’s doing. “Want to dance?”

Brian shook his head as he asked for a beer.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” Justin asked Michael.

“What is it to you?” Michael asked. “It’s none of your fucking business.”

Justin sighed. “I was just trying to have a conversation.”

“Well, I don’t want to say anything to you,” Michael told him. “I’m just waiting for Brian to dump you.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Brian said. “We would have to be together for me to dump him.”

Michael smirked at Justin. “Yeah, I forgot he was just a simple trick.”

Justin was tired of Michael’s attitude. He knew exactly how to retaliate. “Well, that was fun, Brian,” he said looking back at Brian.

“What was?” Michael asked; his interest was peeked.

“Fucking a guy while Brian fucked me,” Justin told him. “It’s none of your business really. Although,” he ran a hand across Michael’s face. “I bet you would love for Brian to fuck you.”

“Justin,” Brian said sternly. “Cut it out.”

Justin laughed and looked at Brian. He tried to look innocent.

“Is he high?” Michael asked.

“Not yet,” Justin laughed. “And if I was, I would still be saying the truth.”

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed. “Brian, tell him to shut up.”

“Oh, I hit a nerve,” Justin laughed. “Mikey wants to be fucked by his best friend.”

Brian glared at Justin.

“You know that he has a big cock,” Justin said really close to Michael. “I bet you dream about that.”

“Fuck off!” Michael yelled.

“Justin,” Brian said.

Justin looked at Brian and laughed. He moved towards the brunet and kissed him hard. He pushed his tongue inside the warm mouth and pulled back when Brian moaned. “Later,” he had his little revenge where Michael was concerned.

“You didn’t say anything to him,” Michael protested. “God, what an asshole.”

Brian shrugged. He watched as Justin disappeared. He couldn’t believe how the blond could manipulate him with just one kiss. He looked at Michael and sighed knowing that he should have stopped Justin from saying anything else about Michael wanting him...no matter how true it was.

***

_You’re dirty and you’re sweet  
You know you’re everything to me_

“So, have you talked to Justin lately?” Michael asked.

Brian frowned and shook his head. “Why would I?”

“So, it’s over?” Michael asked hoping Justin was a thing of the past.

“What’s over?” Brian asked.

“You’re not going to see him again?” Michael asked.

Brian laughed. “I don’t know, Mikey. He appears out of nowhere and we fuck and that’s that.”

“But he doesn’t want you,” Michael said. “You’re like his fuck buddy.”

“That’s exactly what I need,” Brian said. “I’m not looking for anything else.”

“Why not?” Michael asked. “I mean...I thought that when you were older you would find someone to settle down with.”

“Yeah, right,” Brian laughed. “No way.”

Michael felt his heart breaking. But he had faith that if he was patient, Brian would want a partner in the long run.

“Don’t worry about Justin so much. He’s just some guy trying to have fun,” Brian told Michael.

“How old is he?” Michael asked.

Brian stopped and looked at his friend. He had no idea how old Justin was. He shrugged and kept on walking.

“You don’t know how old he is?” Michael asked. “How many times have you fucked him?”

“What the fuck do you care?” Brian asked annoyed. “And what does it has to do with me fucking him?”

Michael sighed. “I’m just trying to make you see that this guy is nothing but trouble.”

Brian chuckled. “He’s harmless, Mikey.”

Michael rolled his eyes and kept walking towards the dinner with Brian.

Brian pulled his phone out when he felt it vibrating. He looked at the number, arched a brow then answered. “Yeah.”

“What are you doing?” Justin asked.

“What the fuck do you want?” Brian asked.

Justin smiled and shrugged. “Just wanted to see you, I guess.”

Brian rolled his eyes.

“Can you come to my apartment?” Justin asked.

Brian looked at his watch. “What for?”

“To fuck, Brian,” Justin told him. “What else would I call you for?”

Brian used his tongue in cheek expression and nodded to himself. “Fine.”

“Good,” Justin said. “Later, stud.”

Brian hung up the phone and looked at his watch. “I have to go.”

“What?” Michael asked as he stopped walking. “Why?”

“There is something I have to do,” Brian told him.

“Was that him?” Michael asked.

Brian looked at his phone. “No, Mikey. I have to go. We’ll do this some other time,” he smiled and turned around, leaving Michael at the door of the diner.

Brian went back to his car and got inside. There was traffic and also it started raining then. Brian cursed and reached for his cigarettes. He lit one while he waited for traffic to clear. He laughed; amazed that he just had bailed on Michael to be with Justin. Then he sobered thinking that it was actually a little scary.

Half an hour later, he was standing in front of Justin’s door. He hesitated before he knocked. He waited but no one answered. He grabbed the doorknob and twisted, the door was unlocked. “Justin?”

“I’m here,” Justin told him.

“Your door was unlocked,” Brian told him.

“I knew you were coming,” Justin said.

Brian closed the door and locked it. He walked towards the kitchen but didn’t see the blond. Then he moved to the living room where he found him. Brian cocked his head to the side and looked at Justin questioningly.

Justin smiled at Brian. “Hey.”

“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked. Justin was standing in the middle of a glossy-black, rectangular, long table.

“I bought this yesterday,” Justin told him. “Sit down. I poured you a drink.”

Brian took off his suit jacket and sat down. He looked at the drink and raised a brow at the blond.

“It doesn’t have poison in it,” Justin laughed and then looked at the remote in his hand. He pressed a button and exotic music started playing. He put the remote down and looked at Brian.

Brian cleared his throat. “What are you doing?”

“Are you ready for dinner?” Justin asked smirking.

Brian frowned, not sure what the blond had planned. “Depends.”

“On?” Justin asked.

“What are we having?” Brian asked.

“Raw meat,” Justin licked his lips and closed his eyes as he started dancing. “You can savoir it but won’t be able to swallow it down...just the tasty juices that come out of it.”

Brian let out a chuckle and watched as the blond danced decadently in front of him. He felt himself getting hard so he grabbed his drink and sat back to enjoy the show.

Justin started to run his hands over his chest then they moved along his body. He turned around and shook his ass for Brian. “I hope you like it.”

“I think I might,” Brian whispered.

Justin smiled and got on his knees. His body moved with the music. He took off his shirt and then turned around so that Brian could see him pinching his nipples. “I want you to fuck me so hard.”

Brian’s mouth watered as Justin licked his palm and then slid his hand inside his pants. He was surely going to fuck the blond.

“Do you like this?” Justin asked as he started crawling towards Brian.

Brian stayed silent. Justin smiled and kissed the brunet. Brian reached for Justin’s cock and rubbed a few times before Justin pulled away.

“This is my show,” Justin told him.

“Okay,” Brian said and he finished his drink. “Move it along.”

Justin lay on his back and took off his pants. He wasn’t wearing any underwear. He turned around and crawled away from Brian. “I want you, Brian.”

Brian licked his lips and unzipped his pants. He grabbed hold of his cock and started to jerk off while never taking his eyes off of Justin.

Justin got up and started dancing slowly. He walked close to Brian and then turned around and bent over so that Brian could get a good look at his ass. Brian’s body was burning up with lust.

“Come here,” Brian hissed. “Now, Justin.”

“No,” Justin told him like a petulant child and moved further from the brunet.

Justin turned on the table so he was lying on his back. He bent his legs and opened them so Brian could get a nice view. Then he opened his cheeks briefly and clenched his asshole.

“Justin,” Brian warned. “Come here.”

Justin shook his head and laughed. He moved his hands to the side and planted his palms on the cold surface under him. He started pushing his hips up and down as if he was getting fucked. Then he whispered Brian’s name over and over again.

Brian was rock hard. He wanted to fuck Justin so badly. “Justin,” he called the blond but Justin didn’t come to him. He was losing his patience.

Justin turned on his belly and then got on all fours. He started moaning and moving his hips to the rhythm of the music. Brian had had enough. He got up from his chair and reached for a condom. He put it on the table and then got rid of his clothes. He never took his eyes off of the blond as Justin reached in between his legs and started fingering himself.

Grabbing the condom Brian, got on the table and kneeled behind the blond. “You are so dirty,” he whispered as he put the condom on.

Justin put two fingers in his mouth and wet them before he started opening himself for Brian once again. Brian watched amazed as Justin worked himself. He had never been so horny in his life. He grabbed Justin’s hand and stopped him.

“Fuck me,” Justin moaned.

Brian positioned himself and entered the hot channel. “Oh fuck.”

Justin put his palms flat on the table and gripped Brian hard inside of him. He moaned, feeling the member throbbing in him.

“Oh fuck,” Brian grunted and pushed once again, finally thrusting deep inside the blond.

Justin smiled and closed his eyes. “Oh yes.”

Brian ran his hands over Justin’s back. He moved slowly knowing that Justin wanted him to go faster but it was payback time.

“Brian!” Justin shouted. He wanted to come so badly.

“Is there a problem?” Brian asked.

“Oh fuck,” Justin pushed himself on Brian’s cock. “Is there something wrong...old man?”

Brian bit Justin’s shoulder blade hard. Justin gasped and pushed back against Brian.

Brian grabbed Justin’s hips and started to push and pull Justin’s body all by himself. After a while, he removed his hands and let Justin take control, but it lasted for only a few minutes before Brian was directing things again.

“Fuck...yes!” Justin screamed as Brian pushed in and out of him. He was trying to hold on but the table was slick with their sweat so his hands just kept on sliding.

Brian pushed Justin’s whole body down. “Don’t move.”

Justin did as told and Brian took care of all movement. When he was getting close he managed to slip his hand in between his body and the table. Justin pushed his hips up and touched himself.

Brian turned Justin’s head to the side and kissed him. Kissing the blond felt amazing. He gripped Justin’s waist hard and came with the blond. Justin grunted his pleasure as Brian did the same. When they were done, the heat started to drop back down.

Brian pulled away and sat on his hunches as Justin turned around. Justin smiled and sat up. He stuck two fingers in his own semen and then offered them to Brian. Brian opened his mouth and sucked on them.

“As promised,” Justin told him.

Brian licked his lips and kissed him. His tongue tasted Justin warm mouth.

“I think I like this table,” Brian said when he pulled back. He caressed Justin’s face and kissed him again. He hugged the blond to him as he kissed him.

“You’re a good kisser,” Justin said.

Brian arched a brow. Justin laughed and got down from the table. He sat in a chair and stared at Brian.

“What?” Brian asked as he got off too. He reached for his pants and put them on.

“Where are you going?” Justin asked.

“I have to go,” Brian told him. He didn’t know why but he couldn’t stay there another second. Justin was really affecting him.

“Okay,” Justin said and sighed.

Brian stopped for a second and squatted in front of Justin. “What do you want?” Someone always wanted something from him.

“What do you mean?” Justin asked.

Brian frowned and got up quickly. “Nothing.”

“Brian,” Justin said. “Don’t get weird on me.”

Brian smirked and put on his boots. “Later.”

“Later,” Justin told him.

Brian stared at Justin for a few seconds.

“What is it?” Justin asked not sure what Brian wanted now.

“How old are you?” Brian asked.

Justin smiled. “Why?”

Brian shrugged not sure what had prompted him to ask for the blond’s age. It was just a thought...a question that he now had in his mind.

“Twenty-five,” Justin told him.

Brian wasn’t sure if he believed him. Justin looked much younger than that.

“I know I look younger,” Justin told him. “My license is here somewhere. I’ll show you later and you’ll see I’m not lying.”

Brian nodded and walked to the door.

“Brian,” Justin called to him, not even looking back at the brunet.

“What?” Brian stopped with the door already open.

“How old are you?” Justin asked. He waited for an answer, but when there was none, he threw his head back as far as the chair allowed him so he could look at Brian.

Brian smirked and then left, never telling the blond. Justin smiled and made a mental note to see if he could get it out of the brunet.

***

_Tell me your secrets  
And ask me your questions_

Justin looked around himself and felt sick. He pushed the trick that was sucking him off away and zipped his pants. He walked out of the backroom and outside to get some air. “Jesus fuck!”

“Are you okay?” a guy that was passing by asked.

“Mind your fucking business,” Justin told him.

“Whatever,” the guy said as he walked away.

Justin started to search his pockets for his cell phone. When he found it, he dialed number eight which was the number in speed dial that would get him Brian.

“What do you want?” Brian answered as he sat at his desk at home.

“I’m in jail,” Justin said.

“You’re where?” Brian asked stopping cold.

“I’m in jail,” Justin told him then he chuckled. “Actually, I’m in front of Babylon. I can’t find my car. Could you come pick me up?” he just didn’t want to bother with remembering where he had parked and then driving.

Brian closed his eyes and thought of a million reasons of why he shouldn’t, but just one of why he should. “Stay put.”

When Brian arrived at Babylon, Justin was sitting on the steps. Justin looked up when the sound of the honk got his attention.

“Hurry up,” Brian shouted. “I don’t have all day for you.”

Justin laughed and got up. He got inside the car and smiled at Brian. “My hero,” he mocked.

Brian shook his head. “Where the fuck is your car?”

“Who the fuck knows?” Justin groaned. “My head hurts too much to think.”

“Whatever,” Brian said.

“It’s dark,” Justin said as he looked out of the window.

Brian frowned. “Are you drunk and high? Of course is dark, is night.”

“I was just making an observation,” Justin told him and then, grabbing the handle of the seat, he pushed it back all the way.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked.

“You know,” Justin said. “If you park the car you could fuck me.”

Brian gripped the steering wheel. “You’re definitely drunk.”

Justin laughed. “Yeah, but you can still fuck me.”

Brian didn’t stop the car. “We’ll be at the loft in just a few seconds.”

Justin mumbled something. Brian shook his head not sure why the fuck he was even here. When he got to the loft he looked at Justin and knew that the blond had fallen asleep. He got out of the car and then went to Justin’s side.

“Justin,” Brian muttered. “Fuck,” He just carried Justin to his loft.

Brian took a shower and when he came out, Justin was up and looking disoriented. “What’s that fucking smell?”

“I think I puked,” Justin said getting out of the bed. “What the fuck?”

“What?” Brian asked as he walked to the side and grimaced. “You better clean that.”

“I’m taking a shower,” Justin told him.

Brian shook his head as he went to the kitchen to make some coffee for the blond. When Justin came out, he went directly to clean up his puke but Brian had already taking care of it.

“It was stinking up the room,” Brian said coming behind Justin and giving him a cup of coffee.

“Thanks,” Justin told him.

“You owe me big time,” Brian told him.

“Yeah,” Justin said as he took a gulp of the coffee. “Anything,” he said and grimaced at the taste of the coffee. He hated coffee.

Brian could see that the blond was distant. “What’s going on?”

“Not much,” Justin told him. He walked over to Brian and gave him the cup.

“Tell me,” Brian said.

“I did a job and it wasn’t the best,” Justin sighed. “It was a piece of crap so I destroyed it and when...when my boss asked for it...I told him someone stole it.”

Brian blinked a few times. “Really?”

“I know that’s stupid,” Justin rubbed his eyes. “No one knows that. Then my father...oh well, my life is just so fucked up.”

Brian walked closer to Justin. “I won’t tell anyone.”

“Brian,” Justin whispered.

“What?” Brian asked as he stared inside the blue eyes.

“Have you ever lied to anyone, for whatever reason?” Justin asked.

Brian nodded slowly. “Yeah,” he shrugged. “And no one knows that.”

“Okay,” Justin looked at the black cup and then away. “I’m tired,” he said.

“There is the bed,” Brian told him. “Think you can find it.”

“Ha, ha,” Justin said dryly and dived in. His body bouncing slightly as it hit the bed.

Brian walked to the kitchen and put the coffee on the counter. He started turning off the lights after making sure he had set the alarm. Then he came to the bed and got rid of the towel around his hips. Justin opened his eyes briefly and smiled.

“Do you solve all your problems with booze?” Brian asked.

“Not all of them,” Justin laughed. “Yeah, it’s a bad habit. I’m working on it.”

Brian smirked and turned on his side. “What’s really bothering you?”

“Leave it alone,” Justin told him.

Brian shrugged. “How tired are you?” Brian asked caressing Justin’s back.

Justin moved around until he managed to half crawl on top of Brian. “I couldn’t get it up if I tried, Brian. I don’t even know what I took.”

“Not very smart of you,” Brian told him.

“If you have any Viagra lying around it could help...or it could just kill me,” Justin chuckled as his eyes closed.

Brian kissed him on the forehead. “Night.”

“Why did you come for me?” Justin asked in a whisper.

Brian looked at the blond and smirked. He had wanted to see him and that was that. “No reason at all.”

Justin nodded slightly as he slipped into unconsciousness, but he knew better even though he wouldn’t remember it in the morning.

***

_If you had your way_  
You’d just shut me up  
Make me go away 

Justin walked into the dinner and looked around for Brian. He didn’t know why but somehow they had ended up agreeing to have breakfast before spending the day together. Justin didn’t think anything of it and he was sure Brian thought the same way. It was just...two friends spending the day together. “Hey, guys,” Justin said sitting next to Emmett in the booth.

“Hey, sweetie,” Emmett said and kissed the blond on the cheek. “How are you doing?”

“Great,” Justin told him.

“You can’t sit there,” Michael muttered.

Everyone in the booth turned to look at him.

“Michael,” Emmett said shocked.

“Hey, honey. What will it be?” Debbie asked as she stood next to Michael.

“He’s not sitting with us,” Michael hissed.

Debbie frowned as she looked at her son. “Michael, don’t be so rude.”

“That’s okay, I’m not five. I know how to be an adult,” Justin told them as he got up. “Just a cup of coffee, please. I’ll be sitting over there.”

Debbie frowned as Justin walked to the back of the diner. She looked at Michael and hit him in the back of the head.

“Ma,” Michael complained.

“What’s with you?” Debbie asked. “How could you be so rude?”

“Justin is just some guy that Brian fucked,” Michael told her.

“Oh,” Debbie said. “The poor guy. Another broken heart.”

“He still fucks him,” Ted pointed out. “Nothing broken there.”

Debbie stopped writing and looked at Ted and then at Michael. “You mean...they're dating?”

“No,” Emmett said. “Or so they say, but you know, I think they are.”

“Shut up, Emmett,” Michael told him angrily.

Debbie frowned and just moved away. She knew that it wasn’t going to be pretty if Brian was dating the blond. For as long as she could remember, Michael had always wanted Brian. Then said man came into the dinner and sat in front of her son.

“You’re late,” Michael said.

Brian shrugged and looked up at Debbie. “Just a cup of coffee.”

“That’s all?” Debbie asked him.

“Yeah,” Brian said and looked at his watch. He looked at the door and then grabbed the paper that Ted was reading.

“Hey,” Ted protested.

“What?” Brian asked.

“Nothing,” Ted told him grabbing another section.

“So, what are we doing today?” Michael asked.

“What do you mean?” Brian asked.

“It’s Saturday,” Michael told him. “We usually spent it together.”

“Right,” Brian commented but said nothing else.

Debbie came back with the cup of coffee and left quickly. She came a second time to refill Ted’s cup. All the while, she was looking at Justin who was watching from the back. The third time she came by was to refill Brian’s cup and this time she stayed because Justin was walking their way.

“Hey, stud,” Justin said smiling.

Brian looked at him. “You’re late.”

Justin shrugged. “Are you ready to go?”

“Actually, he was here,” Emmett said. “But Michael told him he couldn’t sit with us. He was over there in the back.”

Brian frowned as he looked at his friend.

“He was in your seat,” Michael muttered.

“Nice, Mikey,” Brian got up. “Real mature,” He started walking out of the diner.

Justin put his hands on the table and leaned towards Michael. “Sorry, but I’m not going away because I am starting to like this thing with Brian. Get used to my face,” he pulled away and followed Brian.

Michael sat there fuming. Emmett and Ted looked at each other and didn’t say a word. Debbie looked at her son and then walked away. She had heard what Justin had said and she wanted to be furious at the blond but couldn’t. It seemed like Brian had found someone and it was not Michael. Things were going to get crazy and she knew that Michael was going to hurt a lot.

***

_I know, how I feel when I'm around you,_  
I don't know, how I feel when I'm around you,  
Around you 

Brian stared at Justin with a raised brow. He was tired and just wanted to go to the loft.

“You can go if you want,” Justin slurred. “I...I’m...”

“Drunk,” Brian pointed out.

“Leave me alone,” Justin snapped as he shoved his beer into Brian’s hands and then walked away.

Brian put the beer on the counter and controlled his impulse to just leave. He knew that Justin was just going to end up calling him after he was totally wasted.

“Hey,” a trick said, smiling at Brian.

“I’m not interested,” Brian hissed.

The tricked frowned and moved away.

“What was that?” Michael asked. “You turning down a trick?”

“Fuck off,” Brian told him as he took a sip of his drink.

Michael shrugged as he looked at Justin. Brian stayed where he was, watching as the blond returned again and again for one drink after another.

“What’s with him?” Michael asked.

Brian shrugged. “None of my business or yours for that matter.”

“Hey,” Ted said. “I’m hungry. Let’s go eat.”

“Sure,” Michael said.

Brian didn’t move. Emmett interlaced his arm with Ted’s and looked at Michael. “Coming?”

Michael nodded. “Come on, Brian,” he pouted. “Please.”

Brian sighed and nodded.

“Is that Justin?” Emmett asked. “Let’s bring him with us.”

“He doesn’t look too good,” Ted pointed out. “He needs coffee...and a bed and coffee, lots of it.”

Brian looked at him and then turned his back to the blond. Michael smiled as his friend ignored the blond.

“Let’s go then,” Michael said.

“Oh shit,” Emmett said. “Who is that with him?”

Ted shrugged. “He looks angry and...okay, he’s dragging Justin away.”

“That’s not good,” Emmett said. “Do something Brian.”

“It’s not our problem,” Michael said.

“What the fuck?” Brian asked as he turned around. He saw Justin being dragged away by another guy.

Emmett was the first one to take off running after Justin. Brian quickly walked towards the blond as well; he was just a few paces behind Emmett.

“Leave him alone now,” Emmett screamed when they were almost at the exit.

“Who are you?” Craig asked.

“Emmett,” Justin said and laughed. “Don’t worry, I’m okay.”

“Let’s go,” Craig said half dragging Justin out of Babylon.

“Are you sure?” Emmett asked as he stopped.

Brian kept going after them. When he was outside he grabbed Justin by the arm and pulled him away from Craig. “Fuck off.”

“What’s going on?” Michael asked Emmett as they reached Brian, Justin and the stranger.

Emmett shrugged and he, as well as Ted and Michael, just watched.

“Let my son go,” Craig said. “He needs to go to a hospital.”

“I’m fucking fine!” Justin shouted as he pulled away from Brian just to land flat on his ass. He looked at the brunet and lifted a hand. “Get me up.”

Brian licked his lips but didn’t help him. He turned to look at Craig. “What are you doing here?”

“That’s none of your business,” Craig said.

Justin managed to get up and steady himself against Brian’s body. “Just go away, Dad,”

Craig looked at Brian. “He needs help.”

“He’s okay,” Brian said and observed Justin. “Did you take any drugs?”

Justin laughed and shook his head. “He doesn’t fucking care about me, Brian. He just wants to tell me how this is the wrong place for me.”

“You're taking drugs and drinking,” Craig told him.

“Oh, so I guess that if I turned straight, I could just drink like you did for so many years,” Justin said. “Going to bed and passing out or hitting Mom because she cared for you.”

“Justin!” Craig hissed. “Don’t say those things in front of other people,” he looked at the guys.

“Could you give us some privacy?” Justin asked looking at them as well.

Brian arched a brow. Emmett turned around and left while pulling Ted with him. Michael sighed and followed his friends even though he wanted to stay with Brian.

“Don’t worry about Brian,” Justin said caressing Brian’s cheek. “Brian isn't a stranger, he knows me pretty well. Right, Bri?” Justin laughed and would have fallen again if it wasn’t for Brian.

Craig shook his head. “You're wasting your time, Justin,” he turned around and left.

Justin and Brian stayed quiet for a long while.

“He doesn’t know anything,” Justin whispered as he buried his head on Brian’s chest.

“Let’s go,” Brian said taking Justin and dragging him to his car.

When they arrived at the loft, Brian busied himself getting the alarm set while Justin busied himself getting a bottle of whisky. He drank straight from the bottle and went to the bedroom.

“Justin,” Brian said as he saw that the blond was getting wasted.

“Uh?” Justin asked not paying attention to Brian.

“Do you want to kill yourself?” Brian asked.

“Why’d you ask?” Justin asked as he looked into the hazel eyes. “If I wanted to kill myself I would need a lot of more booze to numb the pain and a sharp object to open my veins.”

Brian stared at the blond a bit startled as the back hairs on his neck stood up. He had a bad feeling about what the blond said but he just pushed it deep down. “You keep drinking like crazy,” Brian told him.

“Yeah, so?” Justin asked. “It’s none of your business.”

“You keep making it my business,” Brian said. He sat in the bed next to Justin. “Plus, that’s my whisky.”

Justin stayed silent for a moment. “I’m not as drunk as that day,” he put the bottle of whisky on the floor. “Want to fuck?”

“No,” Brian told him.

Justin shrugged and leaned back.

“If you puke anywhere in my loft, I'm going to make you eat it,” Brian hissed.

Justin curled into a fetal position and started shaking.

“Justin,” Brian grabbed the man and then realized that the blond was crying. He just stared for a few seconds, not really sure what he was supposed to do. Then he got back on the bed as well and hugged Justin, not saying a thing.

“My father is an asshole,” Justin spat out. “What an ass.”

Brian pulled back to look at Justin. “He knows you're gay.”

Justin nodded. “My parents found out when I was still in high school,” Justin whispered.

“What did they say?” Brian asked.

Justin pulled away from Brian and reached inside his pocket. He took out a popper and gave it to Brian. Then he reached in once again, finding a joint.

“Is that any good?” Brian asked taking a hit of the popper.

“Sure,” Justin told him, lighting it up.

“So?” Brian asked.

“So what?” Justin asked as he stared at Brian’s left ear.

“What did they say?” Brian asked once again.

“My father beat the shit out of me,” Justin told him as he stared at his hands now. “Later he said he was sorry.”

“Sorry is bullshit,” Brian spat out.

“Yeah, I believe that,” Justin nodded and passed the joint to Brian.

“So what did he want this time,” Brian asked.

“To remind me that by being myself...no one is going to ever love me,” Justin said. “It’s the talk of the month. He has to do it or he would just die.”

Brian sighed and sat up. “My dad and your dad are a lot alike.”

Justin put his hand on Brian’s back and just stared at it, thinking it belong there.

“He used to beat me a lot...for anything,” Brian said.

“Life sucks,” Justin told him.

“Yeah,” Brian said. “He was mad when he found out that I was gay. Just a few months ago, but then he needed money and then, what the hell.”

Justin sat up and put his head on Brian’s shoulder. “That sucks.”

Brian nodded and turned to look at Justin. He offered the weed to the blond but Justin shook his head. Brian got up and crushed it in the ashtray. He got in the bed and on top of Justin. He kissed him and pushed his cock into Justin’s.

“Do you think he still loves me anyway?” Justin asked wondering if his father cared for him still. “Or even really cares about me?”

“I don’t know that,” Brian said putting his face in between Justin’s neck and shoulder.

Justin caressed Brian’s hair. “My mother is the only one that doesn’t care that I'm gay.”

“Joan doesn’t know,” Brian told him. “She would tell me that I'll go to hell.”

“I will probably end up with you,” Justin laughed. “Good company.”

Brian stared at Justin silently, wondering how it came to be that he could tell Justin anything. He knew what he was feeling something for the blond. He cared for Justin and it scared him. Then there was something else he felt that he couldn’t define. Whatever it was made him lose control around Justin and it frightened him so much since he couldn’t just push the blond away.

“When I am around you...” Justin paused and sighed. “I think I just...get confused.”

Brian smirked; he knew the feeling.


	4. Needing To Disappear

_Looking through the looking glass, looking back at me  
I've got X-ray rear view vision but I don't like what I see_

Brian knocked on the door and waited. When Melanie was the one who opened the door, he groaned inwardly.

“What do you want?” Melanie asked.

“I came to see my son,” Brian told her.

Melanie stepped to the side and let him in. She sometimes still wished that he wasn’t the father, but what else could she do. The truth was that if it wasn’t for him they wouldn’t have Gus.

“Hey,” Lindsay said.

“Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!” Gus shouted as he ran to his father.

“Hey,” Brian said as he picked him up. “How're you doing, Sunny boy?”

“Okay,” Gus smiled and hugged Brian.

Brian sat down with Gus on his lap. Lindsay quickly went over the sofa and sat down. Melanie stayed up, watching them and feeling left out as they played with Gus.

“Hold on, Sunny boy,” Brian said, putting Gus down for a few seconds to answer his cell.

Gus sat on the carpet and grabbed a crayon from the floor to color on his book while his daddy talked on the phone.

“Hold on a minute,” Brian said. “Who is this? Oh, yeah, I know Justin Taylor, why?” Brian heard the bartender and then sighed. “What hospital? Okay, thanks.”

“What’s going on?” Lindsay asked.

“A friend of mine is in trouble,” Brian got up sighing.

“Justin Taylor?” Lindsay asked.

“Yeah,” Brian told her. He hated when people eavesdropped on his conversations. He knew that she was there, but at least she could have pretended or moved away.

“The Justin Taylor?” Lindsay asked.

“What do you mean?” Brian asked wanting to get to the hospital.

“He’s an artist right,” Lindsay said.

Brian nodded slowly not sure he liked where the conversation was going.

“You know Justin Taylor?” Lindsay asked looking at Brian like he was lying.

“You could say I do,” Brian told her smirking. “It’s like the old story of Michelangelo and David. They were...”

“In love?” Lindsay asked stunned.

“Fucking,” Brian told her smirking.

“It figures,” Melanie said shaking her head.

"Who asked you to butt in?" Brian asked.

Melanie glared at him. “Fuck off.”

“Don’t talk like that, Mel,” Lindsay said. “Gus can hear you.”

Melanie rolled her eyes.

Brian walked over to the door. “Gus, come here.”

Gus let go of his crayons and ran to his father. “Where you going?”

“Daddy has to go,” Brian said. “A friend of mine had an accident.”

Gus pouted.

“But I am going to come back, okay?” Brian told him.

“Is your friend okay?” Gus asked.

“I have to go see,” Brian told him. “Give me a kiss.”

Gus threw his little arms around Brian’s neck and planted a sloppy kiss on Brian’s cheek. Brian hugged his son and then let him go. “I'll be back, okay?”

Gus nodded and then ran back to where he had left his coloring books.

“I have to meet him,” Lindsay said.

“What?” Brian asked.

“Justin,” Lindsay told him. “I hear he’s a great artist. He has works hanging all over the country.”

Brian didn’t say another word to her. He just turned around and left to see what had happened with Justin. He called the blond to find out what was going on.

“Who the fuck is this?” Justin asked as he answered his phone.

“Me,” Brian told him.

“Oh,” Justin said. He hadn’t bothered to see who was calling. “What do you want?”

“I’m coming to get you,” Brian told him.

“I’m not actually home,” Justin said as he signed the paper that the nurse gave him.

“I know that,” Brian told him. “I will be there in a few seconds. Are you okay?”

Justin frowned. “How do you know where I am?”

“I have my sources,” Brian told him.

“Creepy,” Justin told him. “This could mean so many things, but I am going to opt for the simplest one. You are a good friend.”

“That works,” Brian said realizing that he was starting to look like a concerned boyfriend among other things.

“Hurry up. I’m in pain,” Justin told him and hung up.

When Brian got to the hospital, Justin was outside having a cigarette. “Justin.”

Justin looked at Brian. “What?”

Brian put his hand on Justin’s cheek and saw the gaze covering part of Justin’s forehead. “What the fuck happened?”

“Not much,” Justin said. “Some guy wanted to fight.”

“They said you started the fight,” Brian told him.

“Whatever,” Justin threw the cigarette away. “I’m ready to go home. Can you give me a ride?”

“Sure,” Brian said. “Did they stitch it?”

“Yeah,” Justin stopped and looked at Brian. “That guy was bothering me you know. I just...I might have lost it.”

“I see,” Brian told him. “What happen to the guy?”

“Just a bruise eye,” Justin said. “He might have been bigger than me.”

Brian shook his head. “You are fucking nuts.”

They got in the car and Justin started playing with the radio.

“Where were you?” Justin asked. “I mean, my problems didn’t interrupt anything.”

“I went to see my son,” Brian said. “I didn’t have to come here, you know. I wanted to.”

“Right,” Justin said. Brian had told him before about his kid. “How is he doing?” he felt important knowing that Brian would be there for him if he needed him.

“Getting bigger by the second,” Brian told him.

“Good,” Justin yawned.

“What did they give you?” Brian asked.

“Nothing,” Justin told him. “Can you believe that?”

“Aren’t you, like, allergic to almost everything?” Brian asked.

“Yeah,” Justin frowned as he touched the wound.

“Maybe that’s why,” Brian watched the road ahead.

“They could still have given me something,” Justin pointed out. He looked at his hand and saw that his fingers had blood on them. He frowned and shook his head as his eyes saw so much blood everywhere. He just wanted the blood to stop flowing.

Brian felt Justin’s hand grasp his tightly. He didn’t even look at Justin to know something was wrong. “Justin?”

Justin was just staring ahead not saying a word. His hand clamped down on Brian’s thigh.

“Justin,” Brian stopped the car and looked at the blond. “What the fuck is wrong?”

Justin looked at him. “When I almost died, there was so much blood. I remember that now.”

Brian froze for a few seconds. His voice was gone and everything felt so alien to him. “What...what are you talking about?”

Justin looked at his hand again. “Blood.”

Brian sighed and reached inside the glove box to get out some napkins and the antibacterial solution he kept there. He started to clean Justin’s hands but his mind kept going to what Justin had said.

“Justin,” Brian whispered.

“What?” Justin asked.

“What happened?” Brian asked as he kept looking at Justin’s hands to make sure they were spotless.

Justin shrugged. “One day this guy got bored...maybe...I don’t know. He decided to go to school and shoot a bunch of people. I was one of those people.”

Brian swallowed hard and he just held Justin’s hand in one of his. He looked at the blond and he felt so small just looking into Justin’s eyes. Because there was such much pain and he wanted to help the blond. He just didn’t know how.

“I was so scared,” Justin’s voice sounded so far away.

Brian felt his skin running cold with all that Justin was telling him. He had nothing to say; he could only listen now.

“I had a bullet hit my chest and another one my head and I didn’t die,” Justin shrugged. He knew that Brian had looked at the scar before but never asked about it. “I guess it wasn’t my time yet.”

Brian’s mouth was dry. He looked at the steering wheel and, letting go of Justin’s hand, he grabbed it. “I guess it wasn’t.”

“I never remembered the blood before,” Justin whispered.

Brian closed his eyes and suddenly the noise outside the ‘vette came inside. Time started moving again.

“Just...drive me home, please,” Justin told him as he threw his head back and closed his eyes.

They drove to Justin’s apartment in silence. Brian was tense all the way, he hadn't known Justin before and now everything that affected the blond, in the past or now, affected him too.

Justin suddenly felt so tired. He didn’t know why he had told Brian about what had happened. He never told anyone but then again he hadn’t been lying to his father when he had said that Brian wasn’t a stranger.

“Are you coming up?” Justin asked as he opened the door to the ‘vette once they arrived.

Brian killed the engine and got out. He followed Justin into his apartment, making sure that the ‘vette was locked.

“Are you hungry?” Justin asked.

“No,” Brian said.

“Me neither,” Justin told him.

Brian stood there not saying anything.

“What are you thinking?” Justin asked him.

“I’m not sure,” Brian walked over to the sofa and sat down.

Justin went to him and sat down too. “It’s no big deal.”

“It is a big deal,” Brian told him. “You could have died.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Justin sighed as he put his feet on the sofa as well and his head on Brian’s lap. “I’m so tired...of so many things.”

“Why did you start a fight?” Brian asked.

“The guy was bothering me, Brian,” Justin told him. “He...he thought I would just take the abuse.”

Brian ran his fingers through Justin’s hair. “You should be more careful.”

Justin smiled. “You know, sometimes I like you better than I do myself,” he whispered to Brian. “You’re a good man.”

Brian shook his head. “I feel the same way some days,” he took a deep breath. “Just wishing I could be someone else entirely. And I am anything but good.”

Justin laughed and closed his eyes. “We’re nuts,” he deduced and just enjoyed the soothing feeling that Brian was providing. He wished he could break away from his skin and be a whole new person. Be more powerful, immune to everyone that was trying to harm him. He opened his eyes and looked at Brian. “Can you stay with me here?”

Brian nodded.

Justin smiled. “Thanks," then, sometimes, he liked who he was just fine.

***

_I found out I’m scared to know  
I'm always on your mind_

Cynthia came into the office and smiled at Brian. “There is this guy outside and he won’t leave. He says he wants to speak with you. I think he is drunk…or something.”

Brian sighed and got up to see what was going on when Justin came inside.

“You can leave us now,” Justin said looking at Cynthia.

Cynthia looked at Brian who was smirking. She nodded and left them. Justin walked over to the door and locked it.

“What do you think you are doing?” Brian asked.

Justin walked over to the brunet and smiled. “I was thinking about you.”

“Is that so?” Brian asked. He frowned, a little afraid of what Justin really wanted from him.

“Yeah,” Justin pushed Brian back in his chair and sat in front of him on the desk. “I was thinking you are a good fuck.”

Brian smirked and nodded. “Obviously.”

Justin laughed and looked around the office.

“What did you take?” Brian asked. “Jeez, Justin. It’s only noon.”

“I’m okay,” Justin grabbed a pen from Brian’s desk. “I talked to my father. He’s an asshole, you know.”

Brian sighed and didn’t blame Justin one bit. He had a father of his own. He knew how things could get.

“Are you busy now?” Justin asked as he put the pen down. He stared at Brian as a little smile form in his lips.

“What if I am?” Brian asked.

Justin started to undo his pants. “Maybe you could take a break. I really need to talk to you about something.”

Brian watched to see what the blond would do next.

“It’s really important,” Justin told him as he stroked himself.

“Oh, yeah,” Brian licked his lips. “What’s that?”

“Fuck me,” Justin told him.

“I've already had you,” Brian stayed sitting on his chair but it was taking a lot of self control.

“Lucky you,” Justin started to take off his shirt. “You can have me again and again and again. I really don’t mind.”

“I bet,” Brian’s hand quickly grabbed Justin’s pants and pulled them away.

“You make me forget,” Justin told him.

Brian caressed Justin’s face and when the blond was naked, he let him straddled his lap. Justin got his hand in between them and undid Brian’s pants. He managed to take a condom and put it on Brian. Then without much ado he impaled himself on the hard, leaking member.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked.

Justin nodded and started to rise and fall on Brian’s cock. He closed his eyes and let the world fade away from him, holding tightly to Brian. Brian wrapped his arms around Justin and got up. He placed Justin on top of his desk. Then he started to pound the blond.

“Ah!” Justin moaned as he felt Brian’s cock pushed inside of him. He closed his eyes and then opened them wide when Brian’s hand covered his mouth.

“Quiet,” Brian gasped out.

Justin licked his lips and grabbed hold of his cock. He started jerking off slowly at first. Then with his other hand, he massaged his sac. He was in heaven and was about to free fall all the way from the top.

“Ready?” Brian asked over his ear.

Justin just moaned since Brian wasn’t letting him talk. Then pleasure was cursing through his veins, his skin, and every part of his body.

“Hey,” Brian whispered as he kissed Justin on the lips. “Are you okay?”

Justin nodded and sat up. He noticed that Brian was sitting in his chair again so he got up from the desk. He looked at the floor and reached for his clothes.

“Justin,” Brian whispered.

“What?” Justin asked snapping at Brian.

They looked at each other, the office filled with nothing but silence now.

“Nothing,” Brian finally said not sure what would have come out of his mouth.

“I have to go,” Justin told him as he put his pants on. His hands were shaking and he knew it was stupid but Brian made him that way.

“Okay,” Brian looked at the mess on his desk. “I have to fix some things.”

Justin just nodded as he put on his shirt. “I’ll be seeing you later, old man.”

Brian glared at him. “Fuck you.”

“Again?” Justin asked smirking.

Brian shook his head as he looked at the blond. Justin walked over to him and kissed him. He sat down on Brian’s lap and kissed some more. When he pulled back, the expression on Brian’s face was the same on his. They were both wondering what they were doing still fucking each other.

“I’ll see you later,” Justin told him when he got up.

Brian shook his head. “I don’t think so,” he wondered if Justin would listen and stay away. “I think we had all the fun we could.”

Justin laughed. “Later, stud,” he walked out closing the door behind him.

Brian sighed as he rearranged his clothes. He thought of Justin for a few seconds and felt himself getting hard. He cursed knowing it was always the same. The blond could get him so fucking horny. He was sure Justin had a few connections with witches.

He shook his head and hoped that he would find the blond at Babylon. One last time and he would be done with the blond; then again he really didn’t believe that since that’s what he had been telling himself for a long while now.

***

_There's a candle burning_  
In the world tonight  
For another child  
Who vanished out of sight 

Brian was looking at the screen on his computer trying to come up with something brilliant when there was a knock on the door. He stayed quiet not bothering to get up. Whoever it was would have to come back later. He waited a few minutes but the knocking wouldn’t stop.

Getting up, he went to the kitchen and grabbed a beer. He looked at the gray, metal door and walked over to open it. “Hello?” Brian asked as he opened the door with his beer in hand. He took a sip and stared at the blonde woman standing on the other side.

“Hi. I know you don’t know me. I’m Jennifer Taylor. Justin’s mother,” Jennifer looked at Brian. “I found your address in my son’s address book. It was one of the few that he marked with a red marker. I know he does that with the important ones.”

Brian arched a brow wondering what she wanted. “Right.”

Jennifer sighed. “I’m trying to find him.”

“He’s not here,” Brian told her.

Jennifer seemed to crumble then. Her face was stricken with pain and worry on hearing that Justin wasn’t there either. “I’ve looked everywhere.”

“What do you mean?” Brian asked.

“He’s missing,” Jennifer told him. “It’s been days since I have talked to him.”

“I’m sure he has been busy,” Brian didn’t want to deal with Justin’s mother. He just thought she was overreacting. “He’s a big boy. I’m sure he is okay. He’ll give you a call as soon as he can.”

“I haven’t heard from him,” Jennifer whispered. Her voice was tight. “He always calls.”

Brian tried to remember if he had seen the blond in all that time and realized that he hadn’t. The bad feeling he had been having the whole week hit him full force. “I’m sure he is okay.”

“Is just that...sometimes he...has these episodes,” Jennifer bit her lower lip. She looked at Brian and knew she shouldn’t be telling him anything about Justin’s life. “I’m sorry that I’ve bothered you.”

“Wait,” Brian told her. “What do you mean?”

“After...he had an incident when younger,” Jennifer told him. “He almost died.”

“You mean the bullet to his head,” Brian said.

“You know about that?” Jennifer asked.

Brian nodded.

“Not many people do,” Jennifer whispered.

“Come on in,” Brian told her and closed the door once she was in the living room. “Now, tell me what’s going on.”

Jennifer and Brian sat on the sofa. Brian just waited for Jennifer to put her thoughts in order.

“He...he would have these episodes where reality just got away from him,” Jennifer said. “His father...his father has a lot to do with that when that happens.”

“Yeah,” Brian said. “These past weeks, Craig has been coming to see him.”

Jennifer frowned. “But he told me he hadn’t seen his father.”

“Even I’ve seen his father,” Brian told her.

“He’s just trying to help,” Jennifer explained.

“I don’t think so,” Brian looked at her hands. She was constantly rubbing them and it was making him nervous. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“No, I’m okay,” Jennifer assured him. “He is just a baby,” Jennifer sighed. “I don’t know what to do. He is out of control. Each time he spirals out of control the damage is greater...and I’m scared.”

“Justin is not a baby,” Brian told her. “He’s a man. I am sure he is fine.”

Jennifer shook his head. “I really need to find him.”

Brian sighed. “I can’t do anything.”

Jennifer nodded. “I know that but if he calls, can you let me know?”

Brian nodded and got up when she did, abruptly. Brian stayed there as she walked to the door.

“Thank you,” Jennifer said and opened the door, getting out of the loft quickly.

Brian sighed and took a sip of his beer. He walked to the door and locked it and then put his back to it. He needed to find Justin too and made sure the blond was okay. Grabbing the phone he dialed Justin’s number by memory.

“This is Justin Taylor. Leave your message or fuck off,” Justin said.

“Great,” Brian said having up. He tried the blond’s cell phone but it was more of the same without the profanity. “Fucking great.”

Brian didn’t know why he hadn't thought of Justin before but with all the work he had, he lost track of time. He shook his head and was sure that Justin would appear at any minute now. Throwing the phone of the sofa he sat down and just waited trying to push the awful feeling away.

***

_Well, the times is frightening_  
Can't ignore the facts  
There's so many people  
Just slippin' through the cracks 

Brian sat in the booth and looked around. He grabbed his phone and dialed the memorized number.

“Hello?” Jennifer said.

“Have you heard anything?” Brian asked.

Jennifer made a strangled sound. “Uh, no.”

Brian sighed. “Thanks.”

“Call me...if anything,” Jennifer closed her eyes. “Do you think he is okay?”

Brian froze up.

“I mean...I...I don’t know what to think,” Jennifer told him. “Do you think he is coming back?”

Brian frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Jennifer said. “The first time they fought Justin moved to New York. Then he went to Virginia. Craig would find him each time. The last time he and Craig fought, Justin moved all the way from California to Pittsburgh. I don’t know why he came back home, but I was happy,” Jennifer made a strangled noise. “I don’t want him to leave again.”

Brian’s heart was beating fast. He couldn’t deal with the idea of not seeing Justin at least one more time.

“He has money, Brian,” Jennifer told him. “He could be anywhere.”

“Yeah, he can,” Brian said trying to sound like it didn’t bother him. “That also means that he is okay.”

Jennifer sighed. “Right. I should go. I don’t want the line to be busy in case he calls,” she hung up quickly after that.

Brian closed the cell phone slowly as he looked at it. He couldn’t believe that Justin had just vanished into thin air. It couldn’t be possible that no one knew where the blond was. It had been a couple of weeks and he was losing his mind already. He didn’t know how Justin had managed to get under his skin.

“Hey,” Debbie smiled and sat down while giving Brian his cup of coffee.

“Hey,” Brian stared at the black coffee.

“What’s going on?” Debbie asked.

“Nothing is gong on,” Brian assured her. “Everything is fucking perfect.”

“I’ve known you since you were fourteen years old, you know,” Debbie smiled. “You can’t fool me.”

Brian frowned and ignored her.

“Where is Justin?” Debbie asked.

“I don’t know,” Brian told her. He shrugged. “He’s not my fucking responsibility.”

Debbie watched the brunet and nodded. “Did you two have your first fight?”

“What?” Brian asked as he leaned back. “What are you talking about?”

“I know that even if is not a normal relationship, it’s still a relationship,” Debbie told him. “I’m happy for you.”

“We were never together,” Brian told her. “Not in the way you're thinking.”

“You look like the world is about to end,” Debbie pointed out. “Why is that?”

“I do not,” Brian was getting so angry. He was so blaming Justin for everything now.

“Right,” Debbie told him. “I’m going to leave you.”

Brian once again stared at his coffee.

“I like him,” Debbie said as he got up. “He’s a nice guy. Kind of like you.”

Brian rubbed his face and looked at her. Debbie was smiling at him. She winked and left him there.

“That’s just great,” he whispered to himself. He didn’t know what he was going to do. Part of him wanted Justin to stay away so his life went back to normal but the other part wanted the blond there now. “Fucking great.”

“Hey,” Michael said sitting across from Brian.

Brian lifted his head and looked at Michael before going back to staring at is coffee.

“What’s with you?” Michael asked.

“Nothing,” Brian told him. That’s all he needed now, for Michael to bother him just like Debbie had.

“Hey,” Emmett said coming after Michael.

Brian just stayed silent as Emmett sat down.

“Have you been here long?” Michael asked.

“No,” Brian told him, his jaw was tense just like the rest of his body.

“Have you seen Justin?” Emmett asked.

Brian shook his head as he got up. He reached inside his pockets and dropped some money in the table.

“Where are you going?” Michael shouted after him.

“None of your business,” Brian shot back.

“Wow,” Emmett sat where Brian had been sitting. “What’s with him?”

Michael shrugged. “I have no clue.”

“Hello, boys,” Debbie said smiling. “What can I get you?”

“What’s with Brian?” Emmett asked.

“I don’t believe that’s on the menu,” Debbie smiled. “I have worked long enough here to know.”

“Oh, come on,” Emmett smiled.

Debbie pouted and smiled. “He and Justin are just...not talking, I guess.”

“Uh,” Emmett said. “It had to be something like that.”

“They are not together,” Michael pointed out.

“They looked pretty cozy each time they went out,” Emmett said.

“Just stop it,” Michael said getting up angry. He shook his head as he made his way out of the diner.

“What is with everyone?” Emmett asked and raised a brow. “What are you feeding them?”

Debbie laughed and squeezed the man’s cheek. She didn’t know what was going to happen with Michael if Brian and Justin ever admitted to being together. “You are so funny.”

“I know,” Emmett told her. “Let me have a salad and cranberry juice, please.”

Debbie nodded and went to place in the order. Emmett stayed at the table smiling, thinking about Brian and Justin and Michael. He didn’t know what would happen, but it surely was going to be interesting.

***

_There's such a small thin line  
Between pleasure and pain_

Brian walked to the door and opened. He came face to face with Justin. “Where the fuck have you been?”

Justin just stared at Brian for a long time. He didn’t know why he hadn’t come to the brunet before...in the first place. “Can I come in?”

Brian stepped to the side. He closed his eyes as Justin’s right shoulder brushed against his chest. It made the blond real and really placed him there at that minute. Justin went straight towards the bedroom but never made it there. Brian turned him around roughly and pushed him down.

“What the fuck happened to you?” Brian asked angrily. “You just fucking disappeared and then you think you can just come here whenever you want to?”

Justin looked up for a moment, nothing made sense, then he just nodded and tried to get up, but the pain in his lower back didn’t let him.

“Justin,” Brian said as he kneeled in front of the blond.

“I’ll just leave, Brian,” Justin said trying to get away.

“I want to know where you were!” Brian yelled.

“It’s none of your fucking business,” Justin told him. “What do you care?”

Brian pushed him back hard. Justin hit the steps once again. He groaned as the pain rushed around his body. But he wasn’t pulling back. He pushed back, angry and scared and horny. Brian didn’t stop to ask the blond if he was okay. He just grabbed Justin by the back of the neck and pulled him in for a kiss. Justin’s hand immediately unbuttoned Brian’s jeans. His hands roamed Brian’s naked chest.

“Turn around,” Brian growled.

“No,” Justin told him. “No!”

Brian licked his lips and he pushed Justin on the side and started to take of his clothes. They were being rough. Justin kept scratching Brian and biting him whenever he could. The sharp edge of the steps was digging into his skin but he didn’t care as long as Brian kept kissing him.

“God,” Brian muttered as he reached inside his pockets for a condom.

“Fuck me,” Justin told him.

Brian kissed him hard and took Justin’s shirt away as well. Justin was naked and at Brian’s mercy. He could feel so much pain on his back but he would worry about that later. After Brian put the condom on, the blond wrapped his legs around Brian’s waist. Brian positioned himself and pushed inside.

“Fuck!” Justin tensed and closed his eyes. He relaxed quickly as Brian’s hands touch him everywhere.

Brian’s fingers buried themselves on Justin’s hips. The blond screamed in pain as he felt Brian scratching his skin. There were going to be blood and bruises all over his skin. Brian bit him hard, he was so mad at the blond and yet so fucking relieved that he was there and okay.

“Fuck,” Justin yelled as Brian pounded into him. He needed to feel Brian all around him. His eyes opened to watch Brian and saw that the brunet was in another world.

Brian stared at the blond and grabbed him hard by the shoulders. He just wasn’t going to let him go.

“Hurt me,” Justin moaned, his breath heating Brian’s face.

Brian closed his eyes and let all control he had just slip away. Justin screamed and thrashed as Brian fucked him. He knew that he would be sore, his mind knew that but he just didn’t care at the moment.

“Fuck,” Brian grunted as he climaxed.

Justin arched against him and splashed his cum in between them. They were both breathing hard and aching; Brian wasn’t so badly hurt though. Their bodies were dripping with sweat and they couldn’t stop touching and just looking at each other.

Justin smiled first. “I’ve never thought of doing it on the stairs always seemed kind of uncomfortable.”

“Mmm mph,” Brian just made a sound as he pulled back. He got up and took the condom off. He could feel his back aching. The outside of his thighs where Justin dug his nails was sensitive as well.

Justin sat up and groaned. “Fuck.”

“You okay?” Brian asked.

Justin nodded and looked up at Brian. “I missed you.”

Brian looked away and didn’t move.

“Brian,” Justin sighed as he got up. “I’m sorry, okay. I just needed time. I didn’t mean to just disappear like that. I never...had to give explanations to anyone before.”

“Sorry it’s bullshit,” Brian said.

“Yeah,” Justin said licking his upper lip. “I forgot that it is.”

“It’s your life so you don’t need to give me any explanations,” Brian pointed out as he walked to the kitchen. He threw the used condom on the trash and went to get a bottle of water. “We are not a couple, so don’t worry about it.”

“Yeah,” Justin could feel his body throbbing. It hurt; not as much as not having Brian close all that time. “I’m gong to stay here tonight if that’s okay with you.”

“Do whatever you want,” Brian told him walking to the bedroom. He was just glad that Justin was okay.

Justin followed him. He caught up to Brian and kissed him on the shoulder. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Brian asked as he turned around to look at the blond. He couldn’t help it; he just had to hold Justin in his arms.

Justin grabbed the bottle away from Brian and smiled. “Being such a great fuck,” he knew that if he said something else Brian would just feel trapped. He knew if he had said something else he would have probably regretted it as well.

“Right,” Brian laughed and arched a brow. “What other places you haven’t done it yet?”

“I’m thinking…the roof,” Justin told him.

Brian thought about it while Justin just ran his hands all around him. But then he stopped and looked at the blond, really looked at him. “Where were you?” Brian asked and Justin looked away. “Look at me.”

Justin raised his head and a tear ran down.

Brian sighed and pulled him closer. “What happen?”

“I had a fight with my father,” Justin said. “He said...he wished I had died.”

Brian got tense and held on tighter to Justin. “Why didn’t you come here?”

“I don’t know. I wanted to be alone, I guess,” Justin told him. “I...I’m here now.”

“Yeah,” Brian muttered. “You are.”

***

Now, I should not bitch and moan but there's not much I can do  
When you're hangin' by a thread and I'm hangin' on to you

“Grab the wine!” Justin shouted as he rushed out of the shower.

“You grab it!” Brian shouted as he grabbed the duvet from the bed. “I took it out.”

Justin looked at Brian and laughed. “Are we really doing this?”

Brian walked to the door.

“Brian!” Justin shouted. “You don’t have any clothes on,” he laughed and went to the counter. He grabbed the wine that Brian had put there and he opened it. Then like Brian had done he walked outside the loft naked.

“Hurry up,” Brian told him from the top of the stairs.

“I’m coming,” Justin said.

“Oh, you will,” Brian assured him as he pushed the door open and stepped onto the roof of the building.

“Jeez,” Justin said taking a sip from the wine straight from the bottle.

“Where are the glasses?” Brian asked.

Justin shrugged and moved closer to the brunet. He pushed the bottle into Brian’s chest and ran away.

“Where are you going?” Brian asked.

“Oh my god!” Justin laughed as he ran around naked to the edge. “I can see the people crossing the street.”

“Someone is going to see us,” Brian hissed. “Come here.”

Justin threw his head back and laughed. He ran over to Brian and grabbed the bottle of wine the brunet had in his hand. “This is so good.”

Brian nodded and pulled Justin close. He started to lick Justin’s neck while the blond swallowed the sweet liquid.

“That feels funny,” Justin told him. He chuckled and caressed Brian’s face. “Fuck me.”

Brian laughed and pulled him closer. He kissed Justin’s jaw and then moved the bottle away so he could kiss the blond’s lips.

“Anyone could come at any minute,” Justin chuckled. “That would be something.”

Brian dropped the duvet on the roof. He opened it and smiled at Justin. “This is going to be one to remember.”

Justin quickly lay on it. “Come here, lover boy,” Justin said pouring the wine on himself.

“Justin,” Brian growled. “That’s a two hundred dollar duvet.”

Justin looked at it and shrugged. “Come lick it off me.”

Brian got on his kneels and then straddled the blond. Justin pulled Brian’s hips towards him. They rubbed against each other. Justin knew that Brian had the condom in his hand since he could feel the edge of the condom wrapper rubbing against his skin.

“Just fuck me, please,” Justin told him.

Brian opened the condom with his mouth and put it on. He took a sip of wine and then grabbed Justin’s leg putting them onto his shoulders. He stared at Justin’s face as he pushed inside the wrinkled bud.

“Fuck!” Justin hissed.

Brian started to move his hips slowly. He wanted it to last for quite a while.

“Umm, Brian,” Justin said.

“What?” Brian asked his hips never stopping.

“I think...that’s water,” Justin told him.

“What are you talking about?” Brian asked out of breath.

“It’s raining,” Justin said.

“Shit,” Brian said as he stopped. It hadn’t been such a good idea after all.

Justin laughed. “I so totally have never done this before.”

Brian arched a brow.

“Keep moving,” Justin told him. “You are not made out of paper, you know.”

Brian threw his head back and closed his eyes as rain fell on him. He looked at Justin and smiled. He kissed him on the lips and shook his head. “We are going to get pneumonia.”

“And die,” Justin laughed. “But what a way to go, don’t you think? Just fuck me.”

Brian started to move his hips once again. The water was cold but being inside of Justin was more important. He always did say he was going to die fucking.

“Bri,” Justin muttered as Brian fucked him.

Brian closed his eyes and all he could picture was Justin...the blond laughing so beautiful, the blond sticking his tongue out at him. He could see Justin concentrating really hard as he stared at a blank canvas or just staring blankly while looking at his drawings. When he opened his eyes, Justin was all he could see and that was pretty scary.

Justin grabbed Brian’s neck and smiled as the water just covered them. He never thought he would feel like he did for Brian. He cared for the man. He cared deeply. He always got to do things he never did before, with the brunet and in some aspect it scared him shitless.

“Kiss me,” Justin breathed.

Brian kissed him on the lips, a gentle kiss. Then another and another until the kisses changed and he was ravishing Justin’s mouth.

“That’s it,” Justin muttered and he groaned when his orgasm hit him. Then his senses were back to normal. He could feel the cold rain hitting his face. Then he heard Brian grunting and moaning, still moving.

Justin caressed Brian’s face and just watched the man on top of him. He did all he could to give Brian more pleasure and it was just perfect. Brian gripped Justin’s thighs and his cum filled the condom.

“You looked so beautiful,” Justin told him.

Brian opened his eyes. “What?”

“Never mind,” Justin smiled and opened his mouth sticking his tongue out.

Brian looked at him and laughed. Justin looked like a kid.

“What?” Justin asked as he stared at Brian.

“We have to go,” Brian said and pulled out of Justin.

Justin sat up and grabbed the bottle of wine. “Okay. We can continue this at the loft.”

Brian nodded as he grabbed the duvet. “Jesus, this is ruined.”

Justin laughed. “But, oh my god,” he walked over to Brian and kissed him. “I think it was worth it.”

“Yeah,” Brian agreed and then pulled away from Justin’s enchanting look. “Let’s go.”

Justin walked to the door on the roof. “Oh my god. It’s locked!”

Brian looked panicked. He ran over to the door and opened the door with no trouble. Then he looked at Justin who was chuckling.

“You’re just too easy”! Justin told him.

Brian slapped him on the butt. “Get inside.”

“Okay,” Justin took one last look at the sky and ran inside.

Brian did the same. He looked up at the sky and knew he couldn’t see any kind of stars but he didn’t need that. He had Justin and that was enough brightness.

“Come on,” Justin yelled from inside the loft. “We need to warm up.”

Brian found Justin in the bathroom. He kissed the blond and then they both jumped in the shower.

“I’ve never done that, Brian,” Justin laughed. “It was fucking insane.”

Brian nodded his agreement. He took the soap and then started to bathe Justin. Justin just let him. He stared at the tiled wall as he felt Brian’s hand roaming his body. No one had ever bathed him either. He smiled as he noticed the care in which Brian touched him. It was smooth but firm, it was driving him crazy.

“Have you ever done this before?” Justin asked.

“Take a bath?” Brian asked him.

“With someone,” Justin said.

Brian stopped and stared at Justin’s back. Justin turned around and didn’t say anything. He knew he had asked the wrong question.

“I think we should get out of here before we turn into prunes,” Justin said as he let the water hit his body and quickly got out. He took one of the towers and dried himself. After that, he got on the bed and waited.

When Brian came outside Justin was on his back with his eyes close. “Justin,” he waited but the blond didn’t move. He sighed and sat on the edge of the bed. He didn’t know what the fuck had happened but it wasn’t good. He moved closer to the blond and just lay next to him. “Goodnight.”

Justin rolled towards the brunet. He let his hand fall on top of Brian’s chest and just stayed very still. Pretending like he was already asleep.

“Jus,” Brian whispered. “You changed me,” he kept his voice really low.

Justin was straining to hear what the brunet was saying.

“Now you keep me going, Jus,” Brian muttered to the blond sleeping in his arms. “For some reason, I need you,” he sighed and stared at the ceiling.

Justin couldn’t believe what the brunet had just said. Then he felt Brian move away and then stop. He wondered what the hell Brian was doing.

Brian looked at the cordless phone in his hand and dialed Jennifer’s number. “Justin came here tonight.”

“Thank god,” Jennifer told him. “Can I speak to him?”

“He’s sleeping,” Brian told her.

Jennifer sighed.

“He’s okay,” Brian assured her. “I really don’t want to wake him up.”

“I understand,” Jennifer told him. “Can you please, make him call me,” she was so happy that Justin was okay.

“Fine,” Brian was about to hung up when she spoke.

“Thank you,” Jennifer told him.

“I didn’t do anything,” Brian assured her.

“He came back to you,” Jennifer said.

Brian sighed as he hung up and put the phone back in is cradle. He looked at Justin and then closed his eyes.

Justin opened his eyes and thought about what Brian just had said and done. Then he closed them again holding on to the man he had come to depend on as well.


	5. Looks Like It's Serious

_Sometimes I’m good but  
When I'm bad I'm even better_

Justin came back to the bar with a trick in tow. He bought a couple of beers for him and the trick.

“What are you doing?” Michael asked.

“With what?” Justin asked getting a shot of tequila.

“Him,” Michael said pointing at the trick. “Brian is going to see you.”

Justin threw his arm around Michael’s shoulder. “Brian is not my owner.”

Michael frowned and nodded. “I know that.”

“I thought you would be happy to see me with someone other than Brian,” Justin said.

Michael pulled away. “Whatever.”

Justin smirked and went back to the trick. He was kissing the trick when Brian came to the bar.

“Hey, Brian,” Michael said. “Want to dance?”

“Not right now,” Brian said looking at Justin.

Justin looked at him and arched a brow. He didn’t move away from the trick.

“Are you sure?” Michael asked looking from Brian to Justin.

“Yeah,” Brian said dryly and asked for a drink.

Justin walked over to Brian and kissed him. “Want to join us?”

“No,” Brian told him.

“Come on,” Justin told him. “I can be very naughty.”

Brian pushed him away. “I said no. I’m staying here.”

“Oh,” Justin said. “You are going to be a little good boy then?”

Brian glared at him. Justin laughed and left for the backroom with the trick.

“What’s going on?” Michael asked.

“What do you mean?” Brian asked.

Michael sighed. “You said this guy was nothing.”

Brian looked at Michael with a frown.

“He is like everywhere,” Michael said. “You’re always with him or fighting or making up.”

“Fuck you,” Brian told him. “I don’t want to talk about this.”

Michael watched Brian move away and he frowned. He didn’t know what to do and once again it was Justin’s fault. He looked at the end of the bar and saw Emmett and Ted. He walked over to them, letting Brian have some time to himself.

“What’s going on with Brian and Justin?” Ted asked.

Michael shrugged. “I don’t know,” Michael told them.

“Don’t you think they are so cute?” Emmett asked.

“Oh please,” Michael frowned. He wanted everyone to stop talking about Justin.

“They look hot together,” Ted said and Michael glared at him. “What?”

“There they are,” Emmett said looking at Justin who was walking towards Brian.

“Why so lonely?” Justin asked Brian once he had come back out of the backroom having gotten bored with the trick.

Brian glanced at him and then ignored him.

“What’s wrong?” Justin asked.

“Leave me alone,” Brian muttered as he drank the last of his beer.

“Brian, sometimes you are so complicated,” Justin told him as he lit a cigarette. “I know why you are mad.”

“Is that so?” Brian asked.

“Yeah,” Justin told him. “It’s because so far, I’ve been ignoring you. It’s been a week now since we last fucked. You miss me.”

Brian scoffed and grabbed the napkin in front of him. He started twisting it as he tried to control his emotions. He wanted to scream at Justin and tell him to fuck off. He was mad at the blond because it was the true and he just didn’t want to admit it.

“I thought that maybe I was getting in your way,” Justin told him. “But I’m here now.”

Brian stayed silent trying to think for a second. He wanted to tell the blond so many things that terrified him to no end.

“Forgive me?” Justin asked as he kissed Brian’s cheek.

Brian smiled a little bit.

“You are such a good man,” Justin told him.

That statement seemed to get to Brian and stab him.

“Fuck off,” Brian told him. “I’m not your toy, Justin. I won’t sit around here while you play around.”

“What?” Justin asked.

“I’m not here for your amusement, Justin,” Brian told him.

“I never said you were, Brian,” Justin didn’t know what was going on with the brunet.

“I don’t know what the fuck you want from me,” Brian told him. “But...you're wrong. I’m no good.”

Justin breathed out and crushed his cigarette away. He licked his lips, not wanting to get on Brian’s bad side. “Do you just want to go?” Justin asked. “I have something planned for us.”

“Fuck off,” Brian hissed.

Justin frowned and got closer to the brunet. He threw his arms around Brian’s neck and smiled. “Come on lover boy. It’s going to be great.”

“I told you to fuck off,” Brian said.

“Oh, here we go again,” Justin said. “You’re trying to act all tough.”

Brian pulled away and glared at the blond. “Why don’t you go play some other place and leave me the fuck alone?”

Justin rolled his eyes. He pulled away and threw his arms up in surrender. “I’m gone.”

Brian just turned his back on the blond and asked for another beer.

“What’s going on?” Michael asked as he stopped Justin. “What did you say to him?”

“Not this shit again,” Justin lamented. “Could you leave me alone?”

“What’s going on with Brian?” Michael asked.

“He needs medication,” Justin told him.

Michael shook his head. “I think it’s better if you just leave. He doesn’t need you.”

“Yeah,” Justin said sarcastically. “He doesn’t need anyone.”

“He needs me,” Michael told him. “I’m always going to be there for him.”

“Michael,” Justin shrugged. “Do you know how pathetic you are?”

“You are just jealous,” Michael said. “Looks like Brian just threw you out of his life.”

Justin nodded. “Yeah, it looks like it,” he told him and then walked away.

“What’s going on?” Emmett asked as Michael walked back to them.

“Not much,” Michael said. “Want to dance?”

Brian had been watching Justin and Michael. He didn’t know what the fuck they had talked about but he didn’t care. He was going to show Justin just how good of a guy he could be. Getting up, he went to the backroom.

Justin saw Brian getting suck off by a guy on his way up. Nothing wrong with that, but when Brian kept going to the backroom all night and ignoring him, he started to get pissed. He had thought that Brian would come around but it looked like the brunet wasn’t budging.

“He’s just fucking with your mind,” Emmett said, shrugging as he kissed Justin on the cheek. He could see that Justin couldn’t keep his eyes away from the brunet.

Justin nodded, thinking it was more like payback time. He smiled and looked at Michael. “Want to dance?”

“Me?” Michael asked. “Why?”

Justin smiled and grabbed Michael by the arm. “Let’s dance.”

Michael didn’t know what the hell was going on and then something in his brain told him. “You want to make Brian jealous with me.”

Justin laughed. “No, but I’ll keep that in mind.”

Michael kept on dancing with the blond.

“Why do you look at my butt sometimes?” Justin asked.

“What?” Michael asked alarmed. “What are you talking about?”

“I think you are cute,” Justin said and kissed Michael’s cheek.

“Hey,” Michael said. “Watch it.”

“Are you saving yourself for someone?” Justin asked as he gripped Michael’s ass. He thrust his cock into Michael’s own.

“No,” Michael said weakly. “We can’t.”

“Why?” Justin asked. “I’m a free man.”

“But...” Michael closed his eyes. It felt so good to rub against Justin.

“Come on,” Justin stuck his tongue on Michael’s ear making the man tremble.

“I can’t do this,” Michael whispered.

Justin smiled and took Michael’s hand. He dragged him to the backroom.

“What the hell just happened?” Emmett asked.

“Well,” Ted said blinking. “I think there might be a murder tonight.

“I can’t believe that,” Emmett said. “Justin...he seemed...somewhat.”

“Nice?” Ted asked. “What part of he’s just like Brian did you miss?”

Emmett sighed knowing that it was true. Justin was exactly like the brunet and maybe deep down they were good but they were rough around the edges and liked to make everyone believe they were bad boys. What bothered Emmett was that Michael seemed to be in the middle of it. “This is going to be really bad.”

Ted nodded. “Just be prepared,” he told him as he tapped the glass he was holding with Emmett’s drink.

Meanwhile in the backroom Michael was standing with his back to the wall. Justin was on his knees sucking him off. Michael couldn’t believe what was going on and then he opened his eyes briefly to look at Justin. When he looked up Brian was staring at them.

“Oh fuck!” Michael said and pushed Justin away.

Justin looked up at Michael and then back. He got up and smiled at Brian. “What?”

“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked grabbing Justin hard by the neck and pushing him towards the wall.

Justin pulled back and pushed Brian away. “Fucking.”

Michael pulled his pants up and quickly got away. He couldn’t believe what just had happened.

“You are such a bastard!” Brian hissed.

“You don’t know the half of it, Brian,” Justin said.

Brian stared back at the blond. “Why did you do that?”

Justin shrugged. “I guess is in my nature to fuck everything that moves.”

“Not my friends,” Brian hissed.

“Why? He’s cute and it’s not like you're going to fuck him,” Justin said taking a step closer to Brian.

Brian smirked. “You resentful little shit!”

Justin stopped for a second. He looked startled and the smirked. “Just like you!”

Brian looked at the blond and laughed shortly. “You were fucking jealous that something else got my attention other than you.”

“They are just tricks,” Justin said but it was true. He hated when Brian put him second.

“That was low,” Brian told him even though he only went with the tricks because Justin had been ignoring him.

“I guess you would know,” Justin said. “Maybe you were feeling the same thing. That’s why you were back here with guy after guy.”

Brian glared at him. “Fuck off.”

“I’m going to go,” Justin told him as he moved away.

Brian didn’t stop him. He just looked around and then left the backroom as well. He went to the bar and started drinking. He wanted to kill Justin but mainly he was angry with Michael. How dare his best friend betray him like that? But then again, Justin was free to do what he wanted to do and so was Michael. Still, he wanted to kill someone.

“Hey,” Emmett said. “We are going to go. Do you need a ride?”

Brian pushed Emmett away. He had been there for almost an hour now, drinking shot after shot.

“Michael left,” Emmett told him. “You won’t have anyone to drive you home.”

“Leave me alone,” was the only thing that came out of Brian’s mouth.

Emmett and Ted looked at each other and walked away.

When Brian finally came out of Babylon it was around two in the morning. He was drunk out of his mind and could barely see straight. He reached inside his pocket for his keys.

“You are drunk,” Justin said coming close to Brian.

Brian held his head as he tried to walk to his car. He looked at Justin who was just smiling.

“Need help?” the blond asked.

Brian groaned and then reached the ‘vette.

“I’ll drive,” Justin told him.

Brian looked at the keys in his hand. Justin took them away from the brunet.

“I...” Brian closed his eyes and he tried to make everything stop moving.

“I know,” Justin sighed as he rolled his eyes. “You don’t need help.”

Brian nodded and walked to the other side. When they were inside the car, Brian let out a laugh. Justin gave him a weird look.

“You are an idiot,” Brian told him.

Justin just stared.

“If you touch Michael ever again, I’m going to kill you,” Brian told him.

Justin just nodded and started the car. “Brian.”

“What?” Brian asked as he threw his head back.

“You are idiot too,” Justin told him.

Brian sighed and tuned Justin out.

***

_The day rolls in, the night rolls out  
Desire rules without a doubt_

Brian opened his eyes and groaned. His head felt as if it was about to explode any minute now. He lifted his upper body just a little bit and looked at Justin.

“Hey,” Justin yawned.

“What are you still doing here?” Brian asked.

Justin smiled at him as he smoked his cigarette. “I decided not to work today. Want to fuck all day?”

Brian yawned and looked to the time. He reached for the phone to call Cynthia. “Sure, sounds like fun.”

“It’s going to be,” Justin told him as his hand slipped in between the bed and Brian’s body. He smiled when he reached Brian’s cock and started jerking him off.

“Oh yeah,” Brian groaned.

“Hello?” Cynthia asked. “Is that you, Brian?”

“Hey,” Brian said clearing his throat. “I’m not coming to work.”

“What?” Cynthia asked. “Why not?”

“Uh,” Brian’s hips were moving at his own accord. “I’m...sick.”

“What do you mean you are sick?” Cynthia asked. “You never get sick.”

“Well, today I am,” Brian told her and hung up quickly.

Justin laughed out loud. Brian glared at him and put the phone in its place.

“Shut up,” Brian groaned and then pulled Justin’s hand away. “I need to sleep.”

“You're turning down sex?” Justin sat up on the bed and laughed. “You are sick.”

Brian shook his head. “My head hurts.”

“That’s what you get for drinking so much,” Justin told him.

“You do the same,” Brian pointed out as he pulled the duvet closer to him.

“But I don’t complain the next day,” Justin kissed Brian’s shoulder.

Brian opened his eyes and smiled slightly. Justin caressed Brian’s face and pushed his hair back.

“Just rest, okay?” Justin indicated.

“Okay,” Brian agreed one hundred percent. He buried his head back in the pillow.

“I’m going to go get a shower and then some breakfast,” Justin told him.

“F..nph,” Brian told him but whatever it was, was muffled by the pillow.

“Right,” Justin shrugged and kept walking to the bathroom. When he came out, Brian was out of the bed.

“What?” Brian asked as he rubbed his neck.

“I thought you were going to rest,” Justin told him.

“I have to go to work,” Brian told him.

“You called and said you were sick,” Justin pointed out as he dried himself. Then he walked to the closet to put something on.

“I was wrong,” Brian said.

“Suit yourself,” Justin put on a shirt and moved the clothes around.

“Justin,” Brian said.

“What?” Justin asked but he didn’t look at the brunet.

“You have clothes in my closet?” Brian asked taken aback.

“Yeah,” Justin said. “For days like this. What do you want eat?”

Brian opened his mouth but didn’t say a word. He was too stunned to even be mad at the blond.

“So?” Justin asked as he turned around with a pair of jeans on his hand. “Some bagels maybe, I could go to the store around the corner.”

Brian nodded. He stared at Justin for a few seconds and thought it wasn’t so bad having Justin there.

“You’ll stay then,” Justin told him cheerfully. “I will make it worth it.

Brian arched a brow as the blond walked over to him. They kissed and Justin left quickly after that. He yawned as he walked over to the drawer. He pulled a pair of shorts and then went to the treadmill. His head still hurt but not as much as before.

There was a knock on the door and Brian frowned. He heard Michael yelling for him and the door opened. Michael looked at Brian and walked inside.

“What are you doing here?” Brian asked.

“Cynthia called me,” Michael said a little agitated. “She said that you said you were sick but that you sounded fine. Then she said you were acting funny.”

Brian sighed. “Fucking hell.”

“What?” Michael asked.

“That woman is something serious,” Brian smirked. “I’m fine. You didn’t have to come.”

“I was on my way here, anyway,” Michael told him. “I wanted to talk to you about what happen.”

Brian tightened his jaw. “Leave it alone.”

Michael stayed quiet for a few seconds. “So, why didn’t you go to work?”

Brian shrugged. “I am the boss. I can do whatever the fuck I want to do.”

“Right,” Michael said and then looked around as if he was a stranger.

Brian arched a brow but kept on running.

“I wanted to talk to you about what happened last night,” Michael said. “I really want to explain everything.”

“Nothing happened,” Brian told him.

“Brian,” Michael complained. “Justin came after me.”

Brian looked at Michael and visions of strangling his best friend passed through his mind. He shook his head and kept on running.

“He just fucks everything that moves,” Michael said. “I told you he wasn’t good for you.”

“I believe he’s my younger version,” Brian said smirking. “Plus, you are hot, Mikey.”

Michael smiled at the brunet. He loved to hear that Brian thought he was hot. “Are you mad at me?”

Brian looked at him for and for a second, he thought of saying yes. He smiled and shook his head. “Of course not, Mikey.”

Michael smiled at him. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“That he is hot beyond anyone’s dreams,” Brian said.

Michael frowned and nodded. “I guess,” he turned around when he heard someone at the door.

Justin pulled the loft door open and found Brian exercising and Michael just next to him. He smiled at them. “Hello.”

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Michael asked.

“Hey,” Justin said. “It’s that anyway to talk to me? After all we have shared.”

Michael felt himself flushing. Justin just laughed and walked to the kitchen.

“I brought you some coffee, Brian,” Justin told him. “Are you feeling better?”

Brian nodded as he put the treadmill to go faster. “In a minute,” he looked at Michael who was staring at Justin.

“Do you want something, Mikey?” the blond asked.

Michael shook his head as he looked at Justin. “I have to go.”

“Don’t go, Michael,” Justin told him. “Stay and eat something. Come on.”

“I said no,” Michael told him. “I really need to go.”

Justin looked at him and nodded. “Fine,” he looked at Brian and then just rolled his eyes. He walked to the bathroom to give them some privacy.

“What’s he doing here?” Michael asked. “After what happened?”

“He sucked you, Michael,” Brian said his voice rose up even thought he didn’t want it to. “It’s not like he raped you. You went willingly.”

“He...said...god,” Michael didn’t know what to say. It was true; he had gone by his own will.

“It’s no big deal,” Brian told him as he stopped running. He didn’t know what he was feeling exactly. He walked to the kitchen and looked at Michael. “Bagel?”

Michael frowned as he looked at the piece of food in Brian’s hand. If Brian wasn’t mad, he deduced that it meant that Justin wasn’t so important in Brian’s life.

“I really have to go,” Michael said. “You should call Cynthia.”

Brian nodded and watched him go. Justin came running towards Brian. “You should totally fuck him.”

“Justin!” Brian hissed.

“Sorry,” Justin said chuckling.

Brian shook his head as he took a bite of the bagel.

“Disgusting, Brian,” Justin told him. “Put some cream on it or something.”

“Want to give me that something?” Brian asked as he reached for Justin’s cock.

Justin laughed and pulled away. “Stop it.”

“Okay,” Brian said and grabbed his coffee.

“It tastes better with this,” Justin said as he dipped his finger on the little container with cream cheese that they gave at the store.

Brian arched a brow and was not going to taste it but he couldn’t contain himself. He leaned forth and capture Justin’s finger in his mouth.

“Amazing mouth,” Justin licked his lips slowly and moved closer. He ran his hand atop Brian’s arm and looked at the brunet. “You are covered in sweat.”

“I’ll take a shower,” Brian told him.

“You stink,” Justin told him. “I like that.”

Brian smiled and left everything at the counter to turn to Justin. He embraced him and pulled him tightly. Their bodies pushed closer to one another; growing harder and hungrier with passion. Justin stopped and pulled back as he unzipped his pants.

Brian looked at the blond and knew what he wanted. He pushed Justin against the fridge and then pulled the blond’s shirt away. He kissed the blond’s jaw and then moved down to kiss Justin’s just below the nipple. Justin threw his head back and groaned his pleasure.

Justin wrapped his fingers in Brian’s hair and pushed him down. Brian opened his mouth and kissed Justin’s chest and then just a little bit more to the south. He pulled back and stared at the saliva which made the blond’s skin glisten. He smiled and kissed Justin’s navel, his tongue running inside the concave place.

“Brian,” Justin whispered as he caressed Brian’s face. The touch was soft yet, rough.

Brian kneeled in front of Justin. His hands trembled as he pushed his shorts down and then away. He looked up at Justin as he took the blond in his mouth. Justin opened his mouth and threw his head back in pleasure. He held on to the brunet’s shoulder, his vision blurring for a second.

The brunet pulled Justin’s jeans down. He didn’t stopped what he was doing. It was too good to stop. Justin in the other hand put a stop to it.

“Get on your belly,” Justin told him in a commanding tone.

Brian did glare at him before he followed the instructions. He heard Justin moving around and he was growing frustrated.

“Now,” Justin said as he straddled Brian’s body. “We are going to have fun.”

“Is that so?” Brian asked and then felt Justin putting something on his back.

Justin then proceeded to lick the cream cheese from Brian’s back. Brian writhed with each lick, kiss or nibble, even the bites that Justin was administrating him. Justin stopped and reached at the top of the counter where he had left the condom. Once he got it, he put it on quickly.

Brian moved his lower body up and clawed at the floor as Justin penetrated him. He felt so great with Justin taking him. He felt complete and perfect and so fucking horny. He was breathing hard and fast and clinging hard onto the back of Justin’s thighs.

Justin moved his hips and moaned. The tightening around him drove him crazy, just because it was Brian. It felt different when he fucked Brian. There was so much more involve than just sex, not that he was dwelling on what was that made it different.

“Fuck,” Brian groaned, his body slipping as the sweat made it harder to have any kind of leverage.

“Grip me hard,” Justin moaned over Brian’s ear. Then he started to suck Brian’s earlobe.

Brian let out a guttural moan and did. He moved his hips wildly as Justin stood still. His prostate was on fire. He tried to move his body up but that’s when Justin decided to start moving again and he felt forward, hitting his shoulder.

“Ah,” Brian grunted. His hips rose as Justin thrust down.

Justin closed his eyes and pushed again and again into the willing hole. He gripped Brian’s left shoulder and with his free hand he started pinching Brian’s nipples.

Brian reached down and grabbed his cock. It only took a few strokes and it was over. He bit his lower lip as the ground below him shook with him. Justin screamed Brian’s name and then he came inside Brian.

“Oh god,” Justin said pulling out of Brian.

Brian turned around slowly and smiled at Justin. “Not bad.”

“Not bad?” Justin asked as he crawled over to Brian. “I will say pretty darn good.”

Brian kissed him. His hand wrapped around Justin’s neck.

“Maybe you could take that shower now,” Justin told him. “I’ll even help you.”

Brian decided at that moment that he liked waking up with Justin.

***

_Nobody said it was easy  
No one ever said it would be this hard_

Justin rushed through the hospitals doors. He never imagined that just half an hour ago Brian would have called him to tell him that he had been involved in and accident. He never expected to feel so helpless about it. He stopped once to ask a nurse for information. Then he was running once again.

When he reached the hall where Brian was sitting, he just stopped. He stared at the brunet and couldn’t help but see a broken man. He took a deep breath and saw two women close by. One of them was crying and the other one kept glaring at Brian.

“Brian,” Justin whispered.

Brian looked up and quickly got up. He walked over to the blond and he wanted to hug Justin but didn’t.

“What happen?” Justin asked.

“I don’t know,” Brian told him. “One minute everything was fine and the next we were driving straight into a wall.”

“Jesus,” Justin gasped and hugged Brian to him by the waist.

Brian’s arms came up slowly and wrapped themselves around Justin. He was glad that he had called the blond.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked.

“Just some bruises,” Brian told him.

Justin nodded and then looked at Lindsay and Melanie. “Who are they?”

Brian turned to look at them.

Lindsay got up and walked over to them. “Hi,” she smiled briefly at Justin. “I’m Lindsay.”

“Justin,” the blond told her.

Melanie got up and walked over to them. “I’m Melanie.”

“Hi,” Justin told her.

“Excuse me,” Doctor Lupe said standing a few feet away from them.

Brian froze on the spot. He couldn’t move.

“I’m looking for Gus’s parents,” she told them.

“We are Gus’s parents,” Melanie said grabbing Lindsay’s arm.

Lindsay gave Brian a pleading look to go with her but the brunet didn’t move. Justin frowned and looked at Brian with a questioning face.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked.

Brian shook his head. “I...it was my fault.”

“Don’t say that,” Justin told him. He pushed Brian back little by little so they could sit. “It’s going to be okay, Brian.”

“You don’t know that,” Brian told him.

“True,” Justin said sitting next to the brunet. “I’m here for you no matter what.”

Brian looked at him and just nodded. No other words were necessary; no other words would have come out.

“Being a parent is not easy,” Justin said. “It takes a lot of work and things never quite go as you plan, Brian. You just have to do the best you can.”

Brian looked up at the blond. “I guess.”

“Do you have a bad feeling?” Justin asked. “Not just worry but a bad, a really bad feeling.”

Brian didn’t know what the blond meant. He just stared at Justin, waiting for him to explain himself.

“I once had a kid,” Justin said.

Brian stared at him, not sure what to say.

“I had him with Lisa Johnson. A friend of mine from high school,” Justin sighed. “We were going to get married and have a family, I guess.”

“And...” Brian’s whispered so low that Justin barely heard it.

“She had an accident and...” Justin closed his eyes briefly. “They didn’t make it.”

Brian frowned not wanting to hear that. His heart hurt just seeing the pain it was causing Justin to say that.

“The thing is...is so fucking hard,” Justin swallowed. “I was a fucking mess and I thought that it was going to die; part of me did.”

Brian trembled, not knowing what he would do.

“Anyway, when I got to the hospital I felt it,” Justin looked at Brian. “I knew...I just didn’t want to accept it.”

Brian thought about what Justin was saying. Then he though about Gus and he knew that Gus was okay. Something in his gut told him so but he didn’t know if it was just wishful thinking. “What was his name?”

“Alfred,” Justin said. “We used to call him Alfie,”

Brian swallowed hard and grabbed Justin’s hand. He looked at the smaller man’s hand and sighed.

“It’s going to be okay,” Justin told him.

“Guys,” Lindsay said walking very fast to them.

Brian got up and once again he was rooted to the spot.

“He’s okay,” Lindsay said crying. “He’s going to be just fine.”

“No thanks to you,” Melanie spat out.

Justin got up quickly and in front of Brian. “Easy there.”

“You were probably drinking,” Melanie said.

“How dare you!” Brian yelled.

“Okay,” Justin said turning around to look at Brian. “Let it go.”

Brian was so fucking mad. Lindsay grabbed Melanie’s arm and pulled her away from Brian. She couldn’t believe that Melanie was being so unreasonable about the whole situation. It could have happened to any of them.

Justin walked over to Lindsay and smiled at her. “Could I talk to you?”

Lindsay nodded and walked away with the blond.

“I wasn’t drinking,” Brian said.

Melanie looked at him from across the hall but didn’t say anything.

“I would never harm him,” Brian raised his voice.

“You almost killed him,” Melanie hissed.

Brian looked at the floor. It was true; because of him Gus had almost died. But it had been a total accident. “I should have been more careful,” he still couldn’t remember what had happened that well. One minute he was on the road and everything was okay and the next he was crashing against a wall.

Justin and Lindsay came back fairly quickly.

“Want to go home?” Justin asked as he stood in front of the brunet.

Brian shook his head.

“There is nothing else you can do, Brian,” Justin told him. “You need to rest and be back looking good so Gus can see that everything is okay. I talked to Lindsay. He was medicated and won’t be up until tomorrow.”

“I can’t,” Brian told him.

“You have to rest, Brian,” Justin told him. “You look awful.”

Brian didn’t cared one bit about him.

“He’s okay,” Justin said. “Plus, I could hear you guys from over here.”

Brian sighed. “Fine,” he got up from the chair and looked at Lindsay and Melanie.

“You are leaving?” Lindsay asked. “Don’t leave, Brian.”

“He needs to rest,” Justin told him.

Lindsay sighed and nodded. “Yeah.”

“We all do,” Melanie snapped at the blond.

Justin glared at her. “Well, he’s going home to get some rest to make sure that he doesn’t bitch at anyone later on.”

Melanie opened her mouth to say something but stopped. She looked away. “My son almost died.”

“I know that,” Justin said. “It wasn’t Brian’s fault. And Gus is his son too.”

“He was the one driving,” Melanie hissed.

“Fuck you,” Justin told her. “We are leaving.”

Brian just followed Justin. “Wait.”

Justin turned around and arched a brow.

“I feel like...” Brian started but didn’t know how to finish his sentence.

“Like you are doing something wrong,” Justin smiled and walked over to the brunet. He caressed him and smiled. “It’s okay. You do need to rest, Brian. You want to see Gus when he wakes up tomorrow.”

“What is he wakes up before?” Brian asked.

“He won’t,” Justin told him. “Come on. I want him to see that you are okay as well.”

“I guess,” Brian said.

Just when they were about to leave two officers came into the hall.

“Mr. Kinney,” Officer Olivetti said.

Brian turned around and nodded. He walked over to the officers wondering what was going on. Justin was by his side in seconds.

“We want to let you know that we caught the guy,” the other officer told him. “He came to the station just a few minutes ago to tell us what had happened.”

Brian couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What do you mean?”

“You were hit from the back,” Officer Richardson said. “He was talking on the phone and then looked away from the road. He bumped into someone that bumped into you and that’s why you spiraled out of control.”

Lindsay closed her eyes and cried. She looked at Melanie and shook her head.

“It wasn’t your fault, Mr. Kinney,” Olivetti told him.

Brian breathed out easier. It felt as it a ton had been lifted off of his shoulders. It didn’t change the results but somehow it was better that way.

“Thanks,” Justin told them. “Come on.”

Brian sighed and walked behind the blond. He felt so awful just leaving, but he was going to be back. For a brief moment, he thought about Justin’s child and still couldn’t imagine going through that. Thankfully Gus was going to be okay and so would he.

Melanie stood in the middle of the hall not knowing what to do. She wrapped her arms around herself and sat down not sure what she was going to say to Brian later on.

***

_The prince of lust has met his match  
The witch has brewed her baddest batch_

Daphne unlocked the door and went inside while she looked around noticing that Justin had changed a few things. She found Justin sitting on a chair with a cigarette in hand and a beer in the other. He was staring at the man sleeping on his bed. “Who is he?” Daphne asked thinking it was just one of Justin’s many tricks.

“Brian,” Justin told her as he looked at her.

“Why are you smiling like that?” Daphne asked.

Justin shrugged and got up. She gave Brian one last look and followed Justin to the kitchen.

“Explain this to me,” Daphne asked him. “Why is he still here?”

“He’s always here,” Justin put out the cigarette. “I don’t know. I just...can’t pull away from him.”

“I see,” Daphne smiled widely. “You like him a lot?”

“Don’t start,” Justin told her.

“Don’t start?” Daphne asked. “I have never started. This is like the first time that I have seen a guy with you for more than two seconds.”

Justin frowned. “That’s not true. I have dated.”

“Right,” Daphne arched a brow.

“There was, uh, well...why are we even talking about this?” Justin asked. “Brian is...he’s just...really good in bed.”

“That doesn’t tell me anything, does it?” Daphne said. “It doesn’t tell me if you like him or not.”

“Too bad,” Justin told her. “That’s all I’m saying.”

Daphne couldn’t believe that Justin had someone in his life. She was actually happy for the blond.

“Hey,” Justin said. “When the hell did you got back?”

“Yesterday,” Daphne shrugged. “I was so tired. I just wanted to sleep for a week.”

“You should have called me anyway,” Justin told her as he started to make some coffee.

“You drink coffee?” Daphne asked. “Since when?”

“No,” Justin told her. “Brian bought it. He said that if he was here, no matter how short a time, and felt like coffee there had better be a machine to make it.”

“Right,” Daphne said very slowly. “Wow, this is more than I thought.”

“Don’t,” Justin told her. “Don’t start reading into things, Daphne.”

“What?” Daphne turned to look towards the bedroom. “Does he have clothes here?”

Justin stared at the back of his friend. “No.”

Daphne looked back and smirked.

“Daphne!” Justin hissed when she raced to the bedroom. He went after and found her going through the closet.

She smiled when she pulled out something from Justin’s closet that she was sure didn’t belong to him. “And this?”

“Put it back,” Justin told her.

“It’s not yours,” Daphne said and then grabbed another shirt. “Oh, man just wait until I call Kate and tell her all this.”

Justin was amazed at it all. He was about to kill his best friend.

“Who are you?” Brian asked.

“Ahhh!” Daphne shrieked as she threw the clothes up. She took two steps back away from the bed almost getting herself into the small closet.

Brian sat up and looked at Justin. “What’s going on?”

“I was just going to wake you up to drive you to the hospital,” Justin told him. “Daphne was picking out something for you to wear.”

“I can do that myself,” Brian said. He got up naked and walked towards the bathroom. Then he stopped and came back. “I don’t know you.”

“Daphne, Brian. Brian, Daphne,” Justin said.

Brian shook his head and went to take a shower.

“Wow,” Daphne smiled. “Oh my god, Justin. He’s well hung,” she whispered.

“Shut up,” Justin said as he turned around to go back to the kitchen.

Daphne laughed and then followed Justin once again. “You are so totally in love with this guy.”

“What?” Justin asked. “Have you gone insane?”

“Come on,” Daphne said and smiled from ear to ear. She put her hand on Justin’s arm. “I saw the way you were looking at him.”

“And what way would that be? With my two eyes, staring right at him?” Justin was getting pissed.

Daphne knew it was time to back away. “Okay fine,” she sighed. “Maybe I am seeing things.”

“Yeah,” Justin told her. “I’ll be right back. Just watch the coffee.”

“Where are you going?” Daphne asked.

“I haven’t showered either,” Justin told her.

“Oh, ha, ha,” Daphne laughed out loud like a mad woman. “Jesus!”

Once Justin was gone, Daphne sat down on one of the chairs in the kitchen. She wanted so much to call Kate but she knew that Justin would be hugely pissed.

When Brian and Justin got out of the bathroom, they dried off and got dressed. Daphne had prepared some toast that Justin had to bargain with Brian for the brunet to eat. Then they headed to the hospital. When they got there, Lindsay told him that Gus had just woken up.

“Hey,” Brian said as he put his hand on Gus’s back.

Gus opened his eyes and they fluttered shut once again. He smiled and reached for his father. “Tired, Daddy.”

Brian smiled. “You should rest.”

“He’s adorable,” Daphne told him.

“And you are?” Melanie asked.

“I’m Daphne,” she said.

“She’s Justin's best friend,” Brian told them. “These are Melanie and Lindsay.”

Gus sat up and looked at the new girl and boy in his room that he had never seen before. “Who that?”

Brian smiled. “This is my friend, Justin, and that’s his friend, Daphne.”

“Hi,” Gus said and giggled.

“He looks like he is going to be okay,” Justin smiled and gripped Brian’s arm.

Brian nodded, so happy that everything was okay.

“I’m going to go get something to drink,” Daphne said. “Does anyone want anything?”

“I’ll go with you,” Lindsay said getting up.

“I’ll go, Daphne,” Justin said to his friend. “Don’t worry about it.”

Daphne nodded and then looked at Gus. “So, little man, how is it going?”

“Good,” Gus told her.

“Could I talk to you, Brian?” Melanie asked.

Brian looked at her and nodded. “Could you watch him for just a few seconds?”

Daphne nodded and stayed with Gus. When Brian and Melanie came back inside they looked a little bit stressed.

“Be right back,” Melanie said after a few seconds and left the room.

“So,” Daphne said looking at Brian.

Brian arched a brow. “What?”

“I’ve been watching you,” she smiled. “I noticed something.”

“Oh,” Brian muttered not paying attention to her. He was watching Gus falling asleep.

“I think you love him,” Daphne whispered.

“What?” Brian asked as he turned away from his son to look at her.

Justin,” Daphne smiled widely. “I think you are good for him.”

Brian frowned. “What are you talking about? It’s just...fucking.”

“Oh my god,” she laughed and shook her head not believing it. “You two are like...totally the same person,” she sighed. “Never mind me. I like rambling a lot.”

Brian just nodded and looked at Gus. His boy was smiling at him, happy to see him; fighting sleep so he could hear and watch everyone. When Brian looked up, Justin was coming inside the room with Lindsay and Melanie. He smiled widely at the blond and knew that Daphne was right, but no one had to know that. He would jump out of a building before admitting that.


	6. Battling These Feelings

_I’m on fire when you’re near me_  
I’m on fire when you speak  
I’m on fire burning at these mysteries. 

“Your friend is kind of crazy,” Brian said after they dropped Daphne at her apartment.

“Yeah, I know,” Justin smiled. “But she’s always there when I need her.”

“That’s good to hear,” Brian commented.

Justin nodded absently.

“What do you want to do?” Brian asked.

“Let’s go back to the apartment,” Justin suggested. “I want to have my way with you.”

Brian couldn’t wait to have Justin in his arms. For some reason, at the same time, their hands found each other and they interlaced their fingers. None of them said anything about it. They just didn’t want to accept that they were getting really involved with one another.

“Are you hungry?” Brian asked when they got out of the car once they had arrived.

“Not really,” Justin told him.

“We could have stopped at the diner,” Brian said.

“Come on,” Justin said to Brian. He wanted to be inside the loft fucking Brian.

They rode the elevator in silence. Brian kept rubbing his thumb over Justin’s skin at the back of his neck. When they got out he reached for the key inside his pockets with his free hand.

“Home, sweet home,” Justin said and pulled away from Brian. He yawned and stretched as he walked inside the loft. He started to take off his clothes knowing that Brian would follow.

Brian closed the door and locked it. When he turned around, it was to find Justin taking off his clothes. “Eager are we?”

“Don’t waste time, Bri,” Justin said as he headed towards the bedroom.

Brian did follow the blond. When he got to the bedroom Justin helped him out of his clothes.

“Are you okay now?” Justin asked caressing Brian’s arm. “Everything is okay.”

Brian nodded.

“Good,” Justin said and got on his toes to kiss Brian’s chin. “Now you can concentrate on what I am going to do to you.”

Brian smirked. “What is that?”

“Lay on the bed,” Justin told him. “Face down.”

Brian sighed and did. Justin went to the bathroom and came with a tube of cream. He straddled Brian’s body and put some on his hands. Then he started to give Brian a massage.

“Jesus fuck,” Brian muttered. “That feels fucking great.”

“I know,” Justin told him. “And there is more.”

“You want to kill me?” Brian joked.

“It’s going to be a hell of a way to go,” Justin teased.

Brian smiled and closed his eyes to enjoy Justin’s ministrations to his body. He was in cloud nine and then Justin told him to turn around. “Over already?”

“It’s been forty five minutes,” Justin told him.

Brian looked at the clock and sighed. “Wow, now what?” he got on his back and waited.

Justin started to drop kisses all over Brian’s body. When he reached Brian’s cock he bypassed it.

“I think you missed something,” Brian told him.

Justin chucked and pushed one of Brian’s legs up and over his shoulder.

Brian’s breath hitched as soon as Justin’s breath hit his crack. He could stop it all with one single word but the truth was that he didn’t want to. He wanted to feel Justin deep inside of him.

“Now this is where you start to die of pleasure,” Justin said and licked Brian’s crack.

Brian felt electricity coursing through his body. He moved his other leg to give Justin more space.

“Whose is eager now?” Justin asked with amusement in his voice.

“Shut up,” Brian said. “Get to work.”

Justin grabbed Brian’s ass cheek and separated them. He licked Brian’s hole and then let his hot breath hit it.

Brian was already squirming. He looked at Justin’s blond hair and watched as the hair moved back and forth. He felt himself turning hot all over. His ears, his cheeks, his nose, his arms, everything in his body as Justin pushed his tongue inside of him.

Justin stopped and looked at Brian. “Good?”

“Don’t stop,” Brian told him quickly.

Justin bit his lower lip and went back to rimming Brian. Brian took a deep breath and tried to control himself. Justin plunged his tongue even farther inside of Brian and started to massage the brunet’s balls.

“Ah,” Brian toes curled and he gripped the sheets.

Justin moved his hand and started jerking Brian off in time with how he fucked Brian’s hole. Brian’s body arched from the bed and he exploded. His cum hit his chest and chin.

Justin pulled back and looked at Brian. His cock was still hard and even more so watching Brian’s body, looking wantonly on the bed. He ran his hands over Brian’s sweaty skin until he was holding Brian by the neck. “More?”

Brian opened his eyes and stared at Justin. “More,” he gasped.

Justin licked his lips and reached for a condom. He kissed Brian as he pulled back and then ripped the condom open.

“Let me,” Brian said and put it on Justin.

Justin got comfortable in between Brian’s legs. Brian wrapped them around Justin’s waist. Then Justin started pushing inside.

Brian threw his head back and closed his eyes. He pushed his hips up to give Justin more access.

Justin’s eyes closed and he enjoyed as Brian enveloped him. He threw his head back as well and pushed his hips forward.

“God,” Brian hissed.

Justin opened his eyes and looked at Brian. He didn’t know what Brian had done to him but he knew he couldn’t turn away from him. He just knew. He started moving his hips faster and faster.

Brian bit his lower lip to keep from screaming.

“Yeah,” Justin groaned, he stopped and took a deep breath.

Brian groaned and gripped Justin’s cock hard. He moved his hips up and down trying to make Justin move again.

“You love it,” Justin whispered.

“Fuck me,” Brian hissed.

Justin started to move again but really slowly. He was enjoying every sensation that Brian produced in him. He felt like the room was burning up and he really didn’t care. He bent down and kissed the brunet.

Brian grabbed Justin’s neck and held him close so he could kiss the blond over and over again. His body was on fire and he didn’t want it to stop. Their bodies were dripping with sweat as they moved slowly.

Brian was so close and he wanted the blond to cum with him. “Come with me.”

Justin kissed him. “I will.”

Brian arched against Justin as he shot his cum between them. His chest was heaving trying to get air inside. Justin buried his nails on Brian’s skin as his orgasm took him over. It was always Brian’s tight space that pushed him over the edge. When the brunet gripped him like he wanted to swallow him whole he just lost all control.

“Wow,” Brian whispered.

Justin smiled and pulled out of Brian. He tied the condom and threw it on the floor. He straddled Brian’s body. He wanted to keep in contact with the brunet.

“That’s one of our best fucks,” Brian told him.

Justin chuckled. “I know that you love it when I fuck you.”

“Shut up,” Brian told him. “You know the only reason I say this is good, is to not make you feel bad.”

“Fuck you,” Justin laughed. He bent down and kissed him. “You do,” he muttered. “And I love fucking you.”

Brian wrapped his arms around the blond and they just kissed for a long time.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked when he felt Justin shaking.

Justin laughed and nodded. He was feeling like he was walking on air. “Yeah.”

Brian pulled Justin’s head back and stared inside the blue eyes. He was starting to tremble as well but he controlled it down. His skin was still burning as well as the tip of his fingers every time they brushed against Justin’s skin.

Justin leaned forth once again and kissed Brian. He couldn’t stop. “You have an amazing mouth,” he smirked. “Fucking great.”

Brian nodded in agreement. “The things it can do,” Brian teased and then started sucking on Justin’s neck.

Justin swatted Brian on the chest. “Stop that or I will have my way with you once again.”

“I don’t mind,” Brian said.

Justin pushed Brian’s hair back with both of his hands. He stared at the man in wonder as to why he felt so much for the brunet. He didn’t have a clue that Brian was having similar thoughts.

“I like your eyes,” Brian said. He couldn’t believe that had come out of his mouth but it was too late to take it back.

Justin put their foreheads together. “I like yours,” he couldn’t stop thinking that they were acting like a couple of schoolboys.

Brian caressed Justin’s skin just above his butt. He liked having Justin on top of him just holding him close.

Justin rested his head on Brian’s shoulder a little bit anxious as to what had been happening lately. He felt himself growing closer to the brunet. He felt weaker around Brian; the brunet could do anything with him.

“I should go,” Justin said.

Brian frowned and nodded. He let go of Justin even thought he didn’t wanted.

“I have work to do,” Justin explained as he reached for his clothes.

“Of course,” Brian said.

Justin got dressed quickly and said he would call Brian later.

When Brian was alone in the bedroom it felt cold so it was definitely because of Justin that he was on fire.

***

_Oh, you could come home and you would know that  
All you want, is right here in this room_

Brian opened the door to the loft and found Justin walking around like he owned the place. He got inside and looked up. Then he started at the blond with a raised brow.

“Hey,” Justin said putting some papers on the desk.

“What are you doing here?” Brian asked.

“Just waiting for you,” Justin told him as he walked to the kitchen. “I got out of work early. Are you going out?”

Brian wanted to ask ‘what for’ but he kept quiet. He undid his tie and looked around. “How long have you been here?”

“Just a few minutes,” Justin told him.

“You do know you don’t live here,” Brian pointed out.

“I know that, Brian,” Justin said. “Do you know that?”

Brian rolled his eyes. “Don’t try to be funny.”

“Did you have a hard day?” Justin asked walking towards Brian.

Brian shook his head and scratched the back of his head. “How the fuck did you get in here?”

“I have Michael’s key,” Justin said smirking.

“How did you manage that one?” Brian asked angry. “Another blow job.”

“I stole it,” Justin said standing really close to Brian. “I am so horny. I got on my new bike and rushed here so you could fuck me hard, daddy. I’ve been such a bad boy today,” Justin told him like a little kid.

“You are so fucking dirty,” Brian’s voice was husky. He snaked an arm behind Justin and pulled the blond closer.

“You like it,” Justin smiled.

“So, you stole the key?” Brian asked.

Justin nodded and licked his lips as his eyes concentrated on Brian’s neck. Brian’s cock got hard immediately.

“It wants to come out and play,” Justin said pushing his own hard cock against Brian’s.

Brian smirked and pushed Justin back until they hit the metal column. “I’m going to fuck you.”

Justin grabbed Brian by the back of the head and pulled him closer. “Hard and fast.”

Brian lifted Justin up and the blond wrapped his legs around him. Then he walked with Justin to the bedroom. He put the blond on the bed and then they both started taking their clothes off really fast.

“Fuck me,” Justin demanded. “Hard.”

Brian grabbed a condom and quickly put it on. He pushed Justin face down on the bed and grabbed the lube.

“God!” Justin shut his eyes and bit his lower lip.

Brian started at Justin’s hole as he slipped another finger and then another. He watched fascinated.

“Fuck me!” Justin hissed. “Just fuck me.”

Brian pulled his fingers away and pushed hard in one swift move.

Justin’s body shook with the force. “God yes!”

Brian grabbed Justin by the neck and started to fuck him hard and fast. He bent down and turned Justin’s face to look at him. Then he kissed him hard. Justin moaned on Brian’s mouth.

Their sweat already mixed with each others.

“Grip me,” Brian instructed.

Justin did, as hard as he could. He opened his eyes and tried to control himself. Brian was rubbing against his prostate, again and again.

“Yeah,” Brian whispered in a husky voice as he moved back and let Justin take control.

“Fuck!” Justin moaned as he rocked hard back towards Brian.

Brian gripped Justin’s hips and plunged into the willing hole. He leaned forth and started to suck and lick on Justin’s back.

“God!” Justin yelled and gripped the sheets under him as he shot his cum.

“Ah,” Brian threw his head back in pleasure as Justin’s hole tightened around him. He growled as he filled the condom to capacity.

Brian and Justin both flopped on the bed gasping for air.

“Jesus,” Justin said cleaning the sweat away from his face.

Brian groaned as he pulled out of Justin.

“I think I like sneaking around to find a way to see you,” Justin laughed. “It’s so worth it.”

Brian smirked and nodded. “Did you really steal the key?” Brian asked turning on his back.

“Yeah,” Justin said as he kissed Brian’s chest.

Brian chuckled. “Good one,” he took off the condom and tied it up. He threw it to the side of the bed.

“Thank you very much. I know,” Justin said getting all his weight on his right side elbow. “Are we going out?”

Brian shook his head. All he wanted was within reach.

“Okay,” Justin was happy with that answer. He just wanted to stay with Brian and spend time with the brunet. “I guess we can come up with a few things to entertain ourselves.”

“I bet,” Brian told him, ready for the second round.

***

_And I got my defenses  
When it comes to your intentions for me._

“Hello?” Brian said into his phone.

“Hey you,” Justin’s voice was heard far away.

“Where are you?” Brian asked.

“Boston,” Justin told him. “I’m coming back this evening. So no worries, you will be able to stare at my bubble but all you want.”

“Okay,” Brian didn’t even know that the blond had left but he was happy that he would see him soon.

“I wanted to ask you something,” Justin told him.

“Oh, yeah, what’s that?” Brian asked.

“I have this thing at the office and I was wondering if you wanted to be my date,” Justin told him. “It’s on Friday night.”

“You are shitting me, right?” Brian asked.

“It’s not going to be a real date, Brian. Just in front of my boss and co-workers,” Justin explained. “I would do the same for you.”

Brian sighed. “Okay, fine.”

“That wasn’t so hard,” Justin told him. “I’ll even buy you dinner and then you can pay up by sucking me off.”

Brian laughed. “You wish.”

“I don’t have to,” Justin told him. “I’ll have you begging for my cock, you sexy thing.”

Brian licked his lips. “Where are you exactly?”

“Walking to the meeting room,” Justin said. “I’m here. Later stud.”

Brian closed his phone and stared at Michael. “What?”

“You should see yourself when you are talking with Justin,” Michael said.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Brian asked putting his cell phone away.

“I think it’s cute,” Emmett said.

“I don’t think you should be using that word to describe Brian and Justin,” Ted pointed out.

“What the fuck are you all talking about?” Brian asked.

“Justin and you,” Michael said. “So much for not being a couple.”

“We are not,” Brian told him.

“That smile was telling us otherwise,” Emmett sing sang. “You guys are so in love.”

Brian glared at the man. “Accidents happen all the time. Be careful.”

Emmett rolled his eyes. He knew Brian wouldn’t really harm him.

“He’s just saying the truth,” Ted said. “We all can see it.”

Brian shook his head. “You are just seeing things.”

“It must be contagious then,” Debbie said coming with Emmett and Brian’s order. “I see it too.”

“Do you get pleasure out of getting involved in other people’s conversation?” Brian asked getting angry.

“Sure,” Debbie told him smiling. She pinched his cheek. “Our little Peter Pan is growing up.”

“He’s in a relationship,” Emmett said very slowly and then smiled widely at Brian.

“It’s not like that,” Brian told them. “It’s just…”

“Fucking.” Everyone said before Brian could.

Brian glared at them.

“They are going out,” Ted said. “I heard it.”

“Fuck you,” Brian sighed. “Just stay the fuck out of it. You don’t know shit.”

“Well, at least it looks like it’s serious for Justin,” Emmett announced.

Brian frowned and thought about it. “What are you talking about?”

“He looks as happy as you do,” Emmett told him.

Brian frowned at the thought. He didn’t want to be attached to the blond. He got up quickly.

“Where the hell are you going?” Debbie asked looking surprised.

“I have something to do,” Brian said.

Michael got up as well and ran after them. “Brian, wait a minute.”

“What do you want, Mikey?” Brian asked stopping to look at his friend.

“Are you and Justin serious?” Michael asked.

Brian shook his head. “It’s really just fucking.”

“Well, maybe he does want more,” Michael told him. “That’s why everyone thinks you two are a couple, because he looks like he is in a relationship.”

“Justin is not like that,” Brian said. “He’s just having a good time like me.”

“Then I guess it wouldn’t be a problem if you two just stopped seeing each other,” Michael said. “Maybe he’s lying to you and he thinks that slowly he would get you to be in a relationship.”

Brian frowned. “I have to go.”

“I’ll see you tonight at Babylon,” Michael shouted after him before going back to the diner.

Brian was going crazy with all the thought he was having. He liked being with Justin but he wasn’t about to give anything more to the blond. They just fucked in occasion and that’s all it would ever be.

First he went home and tried to do some work. But he couldn’t concentrate in anything that wasn’t Justin. That in turn remind him of the many times he had fucked Justin there. So he decided to take a shower and head out.

First he went to Woody’s and stayed there a couple of hours. When he got bored he decided to go to Babylon. Everything was fine; he was having a good time with the guys when suddenly Justin appeared.

“Hey,” Justin said when he came to the bar.

“How was your flight?” Brian asked.

“Great,” Justin told him. “Everything went according to plan. The meeting was great. We got the account.”

Brian nodded. “I’m so happy, Sunshine. Let’s celebrate, go ahead order something. It’s on me.”

“You are drunk,” Justin pointed out.

Brian shrugged and asked for a beer.

“What’s with you?” Justin asked. “Did something happen?”

“Why are you inviting me to go with you?” Brian asked, his words slurring.

“What?” Justin asked confused.

“The thing at work,” Brian said.

“Oh, because I’m sure you will look great in a tux,” Justin told him. “Is just a favor but you don’t have to go if it’s going to do this to you.”

Brian sighed and tried to see if Justin wanted more from him than a favor. “It’s not doing anything to me.”

“Hey,” Justin said but not to Brian. He smiled at the guy that was passing by. “Want to dance?”

The guy smiled and nodded.

“I’ll see you later, Bri,” Justin told him and moved towards the guy.

Brian still couldn’t figure Justin out. He wished he knew what the fuck was going on. His life didn’t use to be so complicated. “Have fun,” Brian called after Justin.

“Oh, I will,” Justin shouted. “Later.”

“Later,” Brian said and watched Justin walked away. He stared at his beer and tried to think what to make of Justin’s invitation. He was cautious in case Michael was right and Justin did wanted more.

***

_It’s hard to break away from loving  
When it feels so good._

“Oh shit,” Justin said when he realized that he was on empty.

“What?” Brian asked.

“We ran out of gas,” Justin said.

“What?” Brian asked taken aback. “What?”

Justin looked at Brian and then the car just came to a stop. “Shit.”

“Fuck,” Brian said. “What the fuck!”

“Ah, great,” Justin said taking out his cell phone. “I have no signal.”

Brian reached for his cell phone and checked it. “Fuck.”

“Oh,” Justin muttered.

“Where are we?” Brian asked.

“We are just a few of miles away from my boss’s house. We are never going to make it if we walk,” Justin said.

Brian ran his hand through his hair. “What now?”

Justin got out of the car. “I just need to find a signal.”

Brian got out of the car and followed the blond.

“Oh there we go,” Justin said moving to the left side of the road and on.

“Where the fuck are you going?” Brian asked.

“Here it is,” Justin said and dialed the number. “Hello, it’s me, Justin.”

“Hey,” Lucas said. “Where are you? Everyone is here.”

“Can you pick me up?” Justin asked. “I’m in the middle of the road to Jackson’s house.”

“No shit,” Lucas told him. “What the fuck happened?”

“I ran out of gas,” Justin told him.

“I’ll be…so don’t…okay?” Lucas told him.

“What?” Justin asked. “You are breaking up.”

“Be there,” Lucas told him again.

Justin sighed and then he lost the signal. He looked back at Brian that had his arms crossed. “They are coming.”

“This is so fucked up, Justin,” Brian told him.

Justin rolled his eyes and walked back to the Jeep. Then he leaned against it.

“How long?” Brian asked.

“I don’t know,” Justin told him looking at his watch. “About twenty minutes.”

Brian moved next to Justin and leaned against the car as well.

“I’m having so much fun,” Justin told him as he stared at Brian who looked like a kid pouting.

“Are you serious?” Brian asked. “We have no gas and we are in the middle of nowhere.”

Justin laughed. “They are coming for us,” he assured him. “You look so cute pouting.”

“I’m not pouting,” Brian was getting angry. “And they are probably going to let us starve here.”

Justin laughed really hard. “You are such a fucking drama queen, Brian.”

“I am being realistic,” Brian told him.

“You are worst than Emmett,” Justin said.

“Fuck you,” Brian hissed.

Justin chuckled.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Brian asked. “You had to put gas on the fucking Jeep to come this far.”

“I wasn’t paying attention,” Justin shrugged. “They will be here in no time.”

Brian shook his head.

“Are you mad?” Justin asked.

“What do you think?” Brian asked.

“Don’t worry about it,” Justin said. “They’ll get us in a second and then you can drink all you want and it all will be in the past.”

Brian looked at Justin and his look said everything.

“I can suck you and make up for his inconvenience,” Justin said looking ahead.

“Okay,” Brian told him.

Justin looked at Brian and laughed. “Get in the car. I’m not getting on my knees here and ruin my pants.”

“And I’m the queen,” Brian smirked as he moved to get in the passenger side.

Justin got inside the Jeep as well and watched as Brian took out a condom and some lube. He arched a brow and waited to see what Brian was going to do next.

“Take off your pants and come here,” Brian said as he unzipped his pants and then pushed the seat back so he was lying back.

Justin smirked and took of his pants and his underwear. He straddled Brian’s body and then kissed him.

“Wait,” Brian said as he ripped the condom. He put it on and then put lube on his dick.

“Aren’t you going to prepare me?” Justin asked.

“No,” Brian told him. “This is what you get.”

Justin chuckled and prepared himself to take Brian. He closed his eyes as the head of Brian’s cock pushed in.

After Justin adjusted to Brian they started moving. It was slow at first and then they started moving faster. Brian kept watching as Justin moved with his eyes closed with nothing but reckless intent.

“You are so horny all the time,” Brian told him.

Justin opened his eyes and started to fall down on Brian hard.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed.

Soon enough Brian and Justin were both reaching their orgasm.

“You are forgiven,” Brian teased with a goofy smile.

Justin lifted up and Brian slipped out of him. He then got rid of the condom and grabbed some napkins from the glove compartment to clean himself and Brian. Brian just observed the whole thing.

“What?” Justin asked as he went back to resting his body atop of Brian’s.

“Nothing,” Brian said caressing Justin’s face.

“That was really good,” Justin said. “Are you still having such a bad time?”

Brian laughed. “Things are improving.”

“Good to hear,” Justin whispered and kissed him on the forehead. “We smell like sex.”

Brian nodded. Justin moved and grabbed a bag he kept on the backseat. He reached inside and pulled out some cologne. He gave some to Brian who shook his head because he didn’t want any.

“You are always improvising aren’t you?” Brian asked.

Justin laughed and nodded. “I guess I do.”

“I like you so much,” Brian said at that moment not caring about anything else.

“I do too,” Justin told him. Justin moved closer and they started kissing each other.

Brian didn’t know what he was feeling but somehow he was choking with all of the emotions cursing through his body at that moment.

Justin pulled back and they stared at each other, each of them showing the same fear and doubt. Justin felt his heart exploding and butterflies on his stomach.

“Move away,” Brian told him scared out of his mind. He had never felt like that before.

Justin straightened up and then heard the car approaching. “He is here.”

Brian quickly zipped his pants while Justin put on his. Then they got out of the Jeep. Looking at each other they decided with just one look that they weren’t going to talk about whatever they have felt.

***

_And everything will be back to the way it was  
I wish that it was just that easy_

Justin was painting on his apartment when there was a knock on the door. He got up and went to answer it. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Brian said and stepped inside.

“What’s up?” Justin asked.

“I’ve been thinking,” Brian said.

“Uh,” Justin said. “Scary.”

Brian didn’t say anything. He looked at the painting Justin was doing and then back at the blond. “We need to talk.”

“What is it?” Justin asked.

“About last night,” Brian told him.

“What is it?” Justin asked. “Didn’t you have fun?”

Brian frowned. After what had happened at the Jeep, they kept having way too much fun and every time he felt like his chest was going to explode. He and Justin were getting too close to each other and he wasn’t going to let it happen.

Justin bit his lower lip. “I see,” Justin said knowing what Brian was talking about.

“What?” Brian asked.

“You are having way too much fun,” Justin said. He had felt his control slipping away but he hadn’t cared. “Maybe even falling for me.”

“This is not me,” Brian told him. “I cannot give you want you want.”

Justin smirked. “And what the fuck is that?”

“I’m not boyfriend material,” Brian said.

“Me neither,” Justin said. “Did I ask you to be?”

Brian shook his head. “Things have changed,” Brian said.

“They have not,” Justin protested.

“I see you more than anyone in my life,” Brian pointed out.

Justin sighed and walked over to the kitchen. “Do you want something to drink?”

Brian shook his head.

“What the hell do you want me to do about it, Brian?” Justin asked as he got a beer.

“Things are getting complicated,” Brian said. “I don’t want to deal with this.”

“Okay then,” Justin said. “No more fun for us.”

“I think...I don’t know,” Brian frowned. “I think we shouldn’t see each other for a while.”

“That sounds okay to me,” Justin told him. “But don’t bother to come back.”

Brian looked at Justin surprised.

“What?” Justin asked. “You think you can use me whenever you feel like it? Put me in a corner and I will wait for you to figure out what you want?”

“It’s not that,” Brian said. “You said you don’t want a relationship.”

“I don’t, Brian,” Justin told him. “But I am not your toy.”

“This is not what I wanted,” Brian told him. “I was having a good time.”

“Then what?” Justin asked moving closer to the brunet.

“I don’t know what happen,” Brian explained. “One day you are just a fuck and the next I am knee deep in all your shit. I even know about all of your problems as if they were my own. I know so much about your fucking life and you know about mine.”

Justin frowned. “Does that bother you that much? What the hell is wrong with it?”

“We are supposed to be fuck buddies only,” Brian said.

“I guess it got away from us,” Justin said sarcastically as he moved towards his painting.

“I guess,” Brian told him. He was feeling his life getting out of control. “My life is complicated, Justin. I don’t want things to change. I like how everything was.”

"Then just take your shitty life out of my fucked up one and never look back,” Justin told him calmly. “And it will all get back to the way it was.”

Brian looked at the floor and nodded. He turned around and walked to the door.

“It was fun, Bri,” Justin called out.

Brian opened his mouth to say something but stopped himself. He walked out of Justin’s apartment and felt like turning back and going towards Justin instead. It didn’t matter what Justin said he knew his life wasn’t going to go back to what it was.

Justin sat inside his apartment staring at his painting. He got up and pushed it all away against the floor. He took another sip of his beer and then walked to his bedroom to find a blunt so he could relax. Things weren’t going to be the same no matter what he told himself.

***

_She got a bottle of tequila_  
A bottle of gin  
And if I bring a little music I could fit right in. 

Daphne opened the door and smiled at Justin. “Hey, what are you doing here at this hour?”

“Can I come in?” Justin asked.

“Sure,” Daphne stepped to the side.

Justin walked to the living room and put on a CD.

“Holy shit,” Daphne said. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Justin told her.

“You only listen to that depressing kind of music when something is wrong,” Daphne pointed out.

“Do you have anything to drink?” Justin asked as he sat down.

Daphne sighed and went to get something for Justin. She came back with a bottle of Jack Daniels and two glasses.

“Good stuff,” Justin told her after he had two drinks one after the other.

“What happened to you?” Daphne asked. “You look like shit and you stink of alcohol.”

“I guess I have been drinking,” Justin told her.

“What’s new?” Daphne asked. “You know I don’t like it when you do all this shit.”

“I know,” Justin told her and smiled at her. He reached for her and pulled her closer. “I love you, you know.”

“I love you too, Justin,” Daphne told him and kissed him on the cheek. “Can you tell me what’s going on? Does it have to do with Brian?”

“Him again,” Justin said and pulled away. “Fuck him.”

“Oh, so it’s about him,” Daphne served herself a drink. “Tell me what happened?”

“Nothing happened,” Justin sighed. “We went our separate ways.”

“Really?” Daphne frowned. She really though that Brian and Justin were meant for each other.

“Yeah,” Justin threw his head back against the sofa and stared at the ceiling.

“What happened?” Daphne asked serving Justin another drink.

“Brian said we were moving too fast,” Justin told her. “Or something along those lines.”

“Oh,” Daphne whispered.

“And he’s right, you know,” Justin shook his head. “I don’t know what the fuck happened. He just…snuck in.”

“Where?” Daphne asked with a little smile.

Justin looked at her and rolled his eyes. “Don’t even think about it.”

“You said it,” Daphne pointed out.

“I’m drunk,” Justin told her and smirked. He got up and reached inside his back pocket for his box of cigarette. “Ah,” he groaned as he sat back down.

“How long ago did this happen?” Daphne asked.

“Like a week ago,” Justin told her. “I should have seen it coming. We were always together and yet…there was some kind of space there, threatening to eat us.”

“Did you guys talk?” Daphne asked.

“As in ‘hi, let’s fuck?’” Justin asked.

“Did you guys discuss what you wanted?” Daphne asked.

“We weren’t in a relationship, Daphne,” Justin told her as he took a long drag of his cigarette. He looked at it and then at her.

“Yes, you were,” Daphne told him. “Even if you didn’t want to accept it and that space you are talking about was your fears and they won.”

“Thank you, oh psychologist of mine,” Justin mocked.

“I’m just saying the truth,” Daphne told him.

Justin grabbed the bottle of whisky away from her. “I don’t want to hear it.”

Daphne sighed and got up. “I’m going to sleep. Don’t stay up too late.”

Justin watched her go and then stared at the television that was shut down. He thought about getting up but he was too tired. He took a swig of the amber liquid and closed his eyes. “We were not in a relationship,” he muttered.

He opened his eyes and looked around the empty space. He got up and walked over to the guest room. His head was pounding like crazy so he took another sip of the bottle. “I’m going to forget you. I have to,” he said to himself and sat down in the bed.

In the darkness it was okay if he let go and cry. No one would see him; no one would know that he was missing Brian like crazy. He would just drink and hang out with Daphne like before and everything would be fine. “I can fit here, as I always did. I don’t need you,” he murmured as his eyes started to close.

In the dark no one would know he was lying to himself either.

***

_I could be cold, I could be ruthless  
You know I could be just like you._

Justin was having one hell of a headache when he entered the diner. He knew he shouldn’t have drunk so much. He took off his shades and put them on the collar of his shirt.

“Sunshine,” Debbie said when she saw him. “How are you doing?”

“Good,” Justin assured her. “Can I have a cup of coffee to go?”

“Sure thing, honey,” Debbie said wondering why Justin look so bad.

“Hey, Justin,” Emmett said waving from the booth.

Justin walked over to them and smirked. “How is it going boys?”

“I haven’t seen you in a long time,” Emmett said. He noticed Justin’s appearance but didn’t say a thing. He was sure that the blond was like that because of Brian.

“He and Brian are not fucking anymore,” Michael hissed.

Ted looked at Michael with a raised brow.

“Yeah, I guess we are not,” Justin said.

“I can still say hi to him, Michael,” Emmett said.

“I told you he was going to leave you,” Michael smirked at Justin as he ignored Emmett.

“Is it in you the need to always be mean?” Justin asked not caring one way or another if Michael answered him.

“I’m just saying the truth,” Michael told him.

“Sure you are,” Justin said. “Plus Brian and I weren’t together.”

“Whatever,” Michael said.

Justin looked at Michael. “And the funny thing is that you still would give anything to be me.”

Emmett sent Ted a look that said ‘this is not going to end well’ and then went back to staring at Justin and Michael.

“Yeah right,” Michael shook his head. “Why would I want to be you?”

“Here is your coffee,” Debbie said.

“Thanks, Deb,” Justin said taking the bag.

Debbie looked around. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Michael told her.

“We are just catching up,” Justin told her.

Debbie nodded and walked away. She was sure something had happened but she would find later from Emmett.

“I have to go,” Justin told them. “It was nice to see you Emmett.”

“Sure thing honey,” Emmett said.

“You too Ted,” Justin muttered.

“Bye,” Ted said to the blond.

Justin looked at Michael. “And as I was saying, you would like to be me because no matter what happened with me and Brian I still got a part of him that you only dream off…getting fuck senseless or vice versa.”

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed.

“No, no,” Justin said as he put on his shades. “We already try that, Mikey and it didn’t work. Maybe you have some kind of defect, no one wants you.”

Michael turned red. Justin laughed and walked away from the dinner.

“He’s such a fucking asshole,” Michael spat out.

“He’s just like Brian,” Ted pointed out.

“No, he’s not,” Michael quickly defended.

Emmett rolled his eyes.

“I have to go,” Michael said getting up and leaving quickly.

“This is just...wow,” Ted said.

“It’s like every love story,” Emmett said. “They find each other, they fight and they get back together.”

“You think Brian and Justin are getting back together?” Ted asked.

Emmett stabbed a piece of his doughnut with his fork and chew on it. He looked at Ted and nodded. “Sit and watch, honey.”


	7. Wanting Each Other

_I’m killing myself from the inside out  
And all my fears have pushed you out_

Brian and Michael arrived at Babylon together. Michael was in cloud nine because his friend had recovered his senses and stopped seeing Justin.

“There are the guys,” Brian said walking towards them when Michael stopped him.

“What are you doing?” Michael asked.

Brian stared at Michael like he was a complete idiot.

“Justin is with them,” Michael told him.

“So?” Brian asked.

“You can’t go there,” Michael said.

“And why is that Mikey?”

“Are you going to talk to him?” Michael asked. “You’re not seeing...you’re not fuck buddies anymore.”

“Are we enemies now?” Brian asked.

Michael shook his head. “I thought you wouldn’t want to see him.”

“Michael,” Brian said as he threw his arm around Michael’s shoulder and they resumed walking. “We’re just not fucking anymore. We didn’t decide to start a war against one another.”

“I know that,” Michael took a deep breath and kept on walking with Brian.

“Boys,” Brian said.

“Brian,” Emmett looked at Justin. “How are you doing?”

“Fantastic,” Brian told him.

Justin drank the last of his beer and put the empty bottle at the bar. “I’ll see you guys around.”

Michael watched him go and turned to Brian. “I guess he doesn’t want to see you.”

Brian shrugged and asked for a drink.

“Why did you and Justin break up?” Emmett asked. “He was perfect for you.”

“We got bored,” Brian said.

“I bet,” Emmett shook his head.

“Do you want to dance Brian?” Michael asked him.

“Not right now,” Brian told him.

“I’ll dance with you,” Emmett said.

When they were gone Brian arched a brow at Ted who had been standing there not saying much.

“I’ll just disappear then,” Ted said and left.

Brian’s eyes landed on the blond. He was dancing with some guy and he wished he could go there and tell the guy to fuck off and then again why not do it. Brian walked over to them and gave the guy one of his intimidating looks. The trick moved away quickly.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Justin asked and started dancing with Brian instead.

“Are you mad at me, Justin?” Brian asked.

“Why do you care if I am?” Justin asked and turned around walking to the bar.

Brian was following him. “I don’t want us to be enemies.”

“Don’t worry,” Justin said. “A shot of beam,” he said to the bartender.

“You’re a nice guy. We can be friends,” Brian told him.

Justin drank the liquid and looked at Brian. “No problem. Now if you excuse me I have a trick to find.”

Brian watched him and wanted to slap the blond around. He frowned and turned to ask for a drink as well. He didn’t know why Justin was acting so cold towards him.

“Brian,” Michael said. “What was that all about?”

“Excuse me,” Brian said and left Michael alone at the bar. He walked to the backroom. He needed to find someone to fuck soon.

“Fuck,” Justin said as he went back to the bar. The guy that had been dancing with him disappeared.

“Justin,” Michael said.

“Mikey,” Justin grinned at him. “What do you want?”

“I want you to stay the fuck away from Brian,” Michael told him.

“I’m not after him,” Justin said. “He’s the one that came to talk to me. Do you have eyes?”

Michael pouted. “He doesn’t want you.”

“You truly are like a little kid, aren’t you Mikey?” Justin chuckled.

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed.

Justin watched as Michael stormed away and he smirked. He looked at Ted who was staring at him. “What?”

“I was minding my own business,” Ted told him.

“You don’t have a business of your own to mind, Ted,” Justin told him. “You’re pretty boring.”

Ted frowned. “I’ll just go,” he said moving away once again.

Justin asked for another drink and stared at it.

“Piece of shit,” Brian hissed as he stood next to Justin.

Justin arched a brow.

“The tricks tonight are for shit,” Brian hissed.

“Yeah,” Justin agreed.

Brian looked at him and then asked for a double beam. He drank it quickly and noticed that Justin wasn’t drinking. The blond was only starting at his drink.

“What’s wrong with you?” Brian asked.

“Not a thing,” Justin assured him as he started drinking. “I’m fucking perfect.”

Brian grinned and knew there was no discussing that issue. Brian knew him inside and out and Justin did definitely fell into the steps of perfection. He could see thought, that something was bothering the blond.

“What?” Justin asked looking up. “What?”

Brian shrugged.

“Why are you looking at me that way?” Justin asked.

“In what way?” Brian asked.

Justin frowned and stayed quiet.

Brian leaned in closer. He could feel Justin’s breath hitting his face and it made him quiver all over. He wanted to take the blond and fuck him senseless. “What way, Sunshine?”

Justin swallowed hard as he felt himself getting hard. He wanted to fuck the man right then. He didn’t think it would be so hard getting over Brian.

“You haven’t answered me,” Brian told him.

“Fuck off, Brian,” Justin spat out.

“Why are you still here?” Brian asked, “if you’re having no luck with the tricks?”

“Why are you?” Justin asked.

Brian smirked and leaned closer. He licked his lips debating if he should kiss the blond right then.

Justin closed his eyes imagining that he was kissing Brian. “No,” he pulled back. “I can’t do this.”

“Do what?” Brian asked a little bit startled.

“I...you were right,” Justin nodded as he remembered Brian’s words. “Let’s not make it complicated.”

Brian just nodded.

Justin put some money at the bar. “I’ll see you around.”

Brian watched him go and turned his back on the blond. He had been an idiot for pushing the blond away but he wasn’t going to say that. Things were better just left alone.

***

_All of the things we want each other to be_  
We never will be, we never will be  
And that’s wonderful, and that’s life 

Brian entered Babylon around eleven. He wasn’t even going to go since he knew there was going to be a celebration for a couple that had gone to Vermont and gotten married. But Michael had bitched enough to him about going out and he gave in. Then there was the truth, he wouldn’t have accepted the invitation for anyone, but he thought he might get to see Justin.

“Brian!” Michael shouted. “We’re here.”

Brian walked over to them and kissed Michael on the lips, briefly.

“We were waiting for you,” Michael smiled from ear to ear. “Isn’t this great?”

Brian looked around and shook his head slightly. He turned to the bartender and asked for a glass of J.B.

“Hi, I’m Dorian,” the guy said looking at Michael. “Do you want to dance?”

“I’m not interested,” Michael said.

“He was hot,” Ted said when the man walked away.

“He wanted you Mikey,” Brian smiled.

“I didn’t like him,” Michael shrugged and moved closer to Brian. “Do you want to dance, Brian?”

“No,” Brian said and left them there in search of a trick.

“Brian never changes,” Ted said.

“I don’t see anything wrong with the way he is,” Michael told them.

“Please,” Emmett rolled his eyes.

“Ladies,” Justin said and kissed Emmett on the cheek. “How are you girls doing?”

Emmett smiled at Justin and blushed a bit.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to prey on Emmett next,” Michael hissed.

“Of course not,” Justin said. “I just like kissing hot men all the time.”

“Hi,” a teenager boy said as he came up to them. “I’m with my friends here.”

“Hello sweetie,” Emmett said.

“I was wondering if you wanted to dance with me,” the boy looked back at his friends and then back at Justin.

Justin smirked and walked over to him. “What’s your name?”

“I’m Ian,” he told him a bit scared.

“Then let’s go dance,” Justin said.

“Justin, he’s just a baby,” Emmett warned.

“I’ll be careful,” Justin threw them a cheeky smile before he walked away with Ian.

“He can get into so much trouble,” Ted told them.

“Let’s hope not,” Emmett said.

“He’s such an asshole,” Michael protested.

“He’s just like Brian,” Ted reminded him.

“Which means,” Emmett said taking his cosmopolitan, “that there isn’t anything wrong with him.”

“Those were your words,” Ted said.

Emmett walked away to the dance floor.

“Since when did Emmett start defending Justin?” Michael asked.

Ted shrugged not really caring one way or another. “Do you want to dance?”

“No,” Michael said and walked away to find Brian.

Meanwhile Justin was dancing with Ian. He was having a good time groping the boy and hearing him moan. He saw Brian coming out of the backroom and he pulled Ian with him.

“Where are we going?” Ian asked.

“Come one,” Justin said. “We’re going to have some fun.”

“Who is that with Justin?” Brian asked Emmett.

“Ian,” Emmett said. “Some guy he just met.”

Brian nodded and went to the bar.

“Brian,” Michael came out of nowhere. “I want to dance with you.”

“Fine,” Brian told him and took Michael to the dance floor.

They danced for a while before they went back to the bar. Ted and Emmett where there too talking about Emmett’s decorating business.

“Want one?” Brian asked as he offered an E to Michael.

“No,” Michael told him.

Brian put it in his mouth.

“I’ll take it,” Justin said.

Brian looked at him and bent down opening his mouth slightly. Justin grinned and kissed Brian. He pulled back when Brian pushed the pill in his mouth.

“What the fuck are you two doing?” Michael asked getting angry.

“Sharing, Mikey,” Brian told him.

“That’s what friends do,” Justin assured him. “Don’t you?”

Michael took a deep breath.

“I sometimes wonder if Michael is going to turn really red and his head is going to explode like a balloon,” Emmett whispered to Ted. “Cartoon style.”

Ted started choking on his beer. He coughed a bit and then laughed.

“Michael!” Some guy said grabbing the man’s arm. “Come here there is someone that I want you to meet.”

Michael walked away from his friends to see what the guy that was pulling him wanted.

“So,” Justin said looking at Brian. “What are you doing here? This is not your kind of night.”

“No,” Brian said. “Michael invited me. And I thought I could find someone praiseworthy of my time.”

Justin just nodded.

“What about you?” Brian asked.

“Same as you,” Justin told him. “Trying to find someone to fuck.”

The music stopped and everyone started applauding. Justin looked at the stage and shook his head as he said, “pathetic.”

“Come on, Teddy,” Emmett said pulling his friend. “I want to see this.”

“Yes it is,” Brian agreed.

The people on the stage gave a speech and then everyone started applauding. The music started again and confetti started falling down.

“How long do you think they will last?” Brian asked.

“Until one of them gets caught fucking someone else,” Justin said. He looked down at his drink and frowned seeing that a piece of confetti had gotten inside.

“I’ll buy you another one,” Brian told him smirking.

“Sure,” Justin said and put his old drink on the bar.

“There you go,” Brian gave the blond a new drink after the bartender brought it.

“Thanks,” Justin said.

“No problem,” Brian watched him.  
  
Justin was looking back at the stage as the newlyweds kissed.

“What every gay man wants,” Brian blurted out.

“Do you?” Justin asked raising a brow as he looked at the taller man.

“No way,” Brian laughed and got closer to the blond. “But I’m special.”

“You don’t say,” Justin smirked. “That’s the exact word they use for people with incapacitations.”

“Fuck you, Justin,” Brian pulled back and grabbed his bear. He took a long mouthful of the liquid and stayed quiet after that.

“Well,” Justin said after a few seconds. “I don’t want that either.”

“Yeah right,” Brian muttered.

Justin looked at him and sighed. “I don’t care what you think. Or what anyone might have made you think. I never asked you to be something else for me, Brian,” Justin told him. “I wasn’t about to change for you so I didn’t expect anything from you.”

Brian frowned and looked away for a moment. “It wasn’t that.”

Justin stayed quiet not sure he wanted to hear what the real explanation was.

“Never mind,” Brian took a sip of his drink. “I’m going to go mingle.”

“You do that, Brian,” Justin said. “I’m out of here.”

Brian held him back. “It was the right thing to do.”

“We had a good thing going,” Justin told him.

“I was never what you thought I was,” Brian said. He was sure that Justin had seen him as a partner some time along the way.

“No,” Justin pulled his arm away. “I thought you had balls and did whatever the fuck you wanted. Now I can see you’re nothing but a fucking coward,” he then left.

Brian stood there sure that Justin was right; after all it was him that had backed away.

***

_What am I gonna do while I'm looking at you  
You're standing ignoring me _

Justin was at Woody’s with Daphne. He had just introduced her to Emmett and Debbie who was out for the night with the boys.

“Ma,” Michael said when he got there. “What are you doing here?”

“This is Mikey, Daphne,” Justin said as he threw his arm around Michael’s shoulder. “He’s a little bit whiny but he grows on you.”

“Fuck you!” Michael hissed pushing Justin’s arm away.

“Michael,” Debbie chastised him.

“He started it,” Michael pointed out.

“This place is empty,” Brian said as he stood next to them.

“You can always leave,” Emmett told him.

“I’ll be right back,” Justin told them and went to the bar.

“Hey, Brian,” Daphne said smiling at him.

Brian smiled at her. He kissed her on the cheek and she blushed. “How are you doing?”

“Good,” Daphne told him.

Brian nodded.

“Here you go,” Justin said coming back with a few beers his hands. He handed one to Debbie, one to Emmett and one to Daphne. He even got one for Michael. Then he took a sip of his own beer and walked away.

“I guess you’re a painting on the wall to him,” Michael said. “You can have mine.”

“That’s okay,” Brian said. “He knows I can afford my own drinks,” he told them and left to get something. He didn’t care if the blond was playing childish games and choose to ignore him.

Daphne sighed and went after Justin.

“What do you want?” Justin asked when he looked back at Daphne. “I’m talking here, with...what’s your name?”

“Richard,” the guy told him.

“With Richard,” Justin said.

“What are you playing at?” Daphne asked. “You totally ignored Brian.”

“He’s a fucking asshole,” Justin said. “I really can’t believe I became friends with him.”

“You’re so in love with him,” Daphne muttered. “That’s why you’re acting like this.”

“Sure thing, Daphne,” Justin said sarcastically. “Now that you discovered the big secret could you leave me alone? I said I would bring you to Woody’s I never said I would spend the whole night with you.”

Daphne looked at Richard. She rolled her eyes and moved closer to the blond. “He’s just a baby.”

“Mmm,” Justin looked at her and licked his lips. “Just how I like them.”

“Who was that?” Richard asked.

“My best friend,” Justin told him. “How old are you?”

“Eighteen,” Richard said.

Justin got closer. “I’m going to kiss you.”

Richard’s heartbeat accelerated and he closed his eyes as soon as Justin’s lips were on him.

“Come on,” Justin said pulling the teenager with him.

They got in the bathroom and Justin walked with Richard to a stall. He locked it and then attacked the guy’s mouth.

“Oh god,” Richard moaned when Justin grabbed his ass and pulled him close. Their hard cocks rubbed against each other.

“I want to fuck you so hard,” Justin told him in a husky voice.

Richard threw his head back. Justin attacked the teen’s neck. He unzipped Richard’s pants and pushed them down along with his underwear.

“I’ve never done this,” Richard muttered.

Justin kissed him. “I’ll be gentle.”

Richard found himself being turned around. He gasped when he felt Justin’s fingers at his hole.

“Relax,” Justin told him. “You’ll like it. The lube will warm up.”

Richard’s eyes closed and he pushed back against the blond. He was feeling like he just flew into heaven. Then it was all gone. Justin undid his pants and quickly put the condom on his hard cock. He placed it at Richard’s entrance and started to push in.

“Oh god!” Richard yelled.

“Take deep breaths,” Justin told him as he held him by the hips.

Richard was paralyzed and he was trying to get away from Justin. Justin held him steady and pushed in all the way.

“Stop,” Richard muttered.

“It’s going to go away, promise,” Justin told him and waited.

After a few seconds Richard tried to straighten out. Justin pulled back a bit and pushed back inside.

“Fuck!” Richard hissed in between pain and pleasure.

Justin pulled out almost all the way out and pushed inside. He rotated his hips to make sure to rub the guy’s prostate.

“Of fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,” Richard chanted.

“Told you,” Justin grinned a bit and got in to a comfortable rhythm. He didn’t want to get out of control with Richard. He wanted the boy enjoy his first time.

“Oh please,” Richard had his palms resting against the wall. He used it to push back into Justin.

Justin grabbed the teen’s cock and started jerking him off. Richard started moaning and yelling while he splashed his cum on the wall. Justin closed his eyes as Richard’s hole spasm around him. He pulled back and then inside the quivering hole. Then he entered oblivion.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked when he pulled back.

“Yeah,” Richard told him.

Justin threw the used condom on the toilet and flushed it. They got cleaned up and got out of there.

“You were so fucking great,” Richard told him smiling. “Thank you.”

Justin just nodded and walked with the boy to the bar. “Want a beer?”

“Yeah,” Richard told him.

Justin was standing across Brian. Brian smirked and mouthed ‘had fun?’ to the blond. Justin turned his back on the man and pretended like he wasn’t there.

“Want to play pool?” Daphne asked. “Emmett’s teaching me.”

“We’re going to Babylon,” Justin said giving the beer to Richard.

“Thanks,” Richard told him.

Justin looked at his friend. “Are you coming with us?”

“Fine,” Daphne told him and waited for them to finish their beer.

“Okay, let’s go,” Justin said grabbing Richard with him.

Daphne walked over to Emmett. “We’re going to Babylon.”

“We’ll go there in a bit,” Emmett said. “Let me finish this game with Teddy.”

Justin waited for Daphne outside of Woody’s and when she got there they walked to Babylon. Once at Babylon the music surrounded them and the three of them danced for a while. Then Justin took Richard to the backroom and Daphne waited for them at the bar.

“We’re back,” Justin told her.

Daphne shook her head. She had been watching the blond all that time. She knew him like the palm of her hand.

“I have to go,” Richard said suddenly.

Justin arched a brow.

“I have school tomorrow,” Richard told him. “My...professor is giving the class a test.”

Justin nodded slowly.

“Can I see you again?” Richard asked.

“If you see me around I won’t mind if you come to say hi,” Justin told him and kissed him.

Richard gave him his biggest smile when they pulled away from each other. Then he turned around and left.

“I bet he’s still in high school,” Daphne told him.

“Probably,” Justin laughed. “I remember those times.”

Daphne smiled briefly.

“It’s late,” Justin told her.

“Do you have to work tomorrow?” Daphne asked him.

“I quit,” Justin told her.

“What?” Daphne asked. “Why?”

“I’m making more money just painting and drawing,” Justin told her. “And I can’t stand someone telling me what to fucking do.”

Daphne knew it was true. She was surprised that Justin had lasted so long.

“Do you want to go home thought?” Justin asked as he looked around the dance floor.

“Sure,” Daphne said. “I didn’t see him either.”

“I’m going to pretend like you didn’t say that,” Justin told her. He waved at Emmett, who had gotten there a while ago, as he passed him by.

“Pretend all you want,” Daphne laughed.

Justin threw his arms around her shoulders. “I hate you sometimes Daph.”

Daphne laughed and they made their way out of Babylon. That’s when Brian bumped into them.

“Watch out, asshole!” Justin hissed well aware of whom he was talking to.

Brian looked at Daphne. “I’m sorry. Forgive me?”

“Of course,” Daphne told him.

Then Brian kept on walking. Justin opened his mouth to say something but held back. He couldn’t believe that Brian was now ignoring him.

“You two are like kids,” Daphne said.

“We’re not,” Justin disagreed.

“Let’s just go,” Daphne said getting out of the place.

Justin looked back at Brian who had his back to him. He narrowed his eyes at the brunet and then followed his friend.

***

_And I know that way under, you feel it too_  
And I know that you are just like me with  
Someone disappointed in you 

“I said I was fucking coming!” Justin yelled as he walked to the door. “It’s you.”

“Yeah,” Craig said.

Justin left the door open and walked to the kitchen. He looked in the fridge for some juice. “Do you want anything?”

“No,” Craig told him.

“What do you want?” Justin asked.

“To invite you to the house,” Craig told him. He looked around the place.

Justin eyed him as he served himself a glass of juice. “What for?”

“Your mother misses you,” Craig frowned a bit when he came across to a nude painting; one of a man.

“I bet,” Justin said drinking his juice. He looked at his watch and frowned. He was supposed to meet up with Daphne about an hour ago. He shrugged and put the glass on the sink.

“We do, Justin,” Craig told him. “We want to have dinner with you. That’s all.”

Justin shook his head. “It’s not going to work out.”

“Why not?” Craig asked.

“You or I or fucking life is going to find a way to screw it up,” Justin told him.

“Don’t be so pessimistic,” Craig wanted to win his son back little by little. He knew that his little boy was still there somewhere inside the man that was now standing in front of him.

“Okay, I’ll be realistic,” Justin said. “You’re going to fuck it up.”

Craig grimaced. “You have no respect for me?”

“I guess you threw it all away and I used to give it so freely,” Justin muttered. “What a shame.”

“I admit that I made some mistakes,” Craig said.

“Dad,” Justin just wanted to be left alone. “Could you go? I’m not going.”

“This is what I hate about your life,” Craig told him. “You have turned yourself completely against us.”

Justin stared at him. “That’s not true.”

“It is,” Craig’s voice rose up a notch.

“You’re the one that can’t accept me how I am!” Justin told him his voice echoing in his home.

“I don’t think that drinking and fucking so many men is what anyone would want for their kids,” Craig told him. “God knows if you’re doing drugs.”

“I have to cope somehow,” Justin retorted.

Craig shook his head. “I’m so disappointed in you.”

Justin’s lips formed into a thin line, mostly because all he could think of saying was ‘fuck you’ again and again. He didn’t think he would sound all that wise acting like a teenager. He felt disappointed in his father too. He thought that they were supposed to love you no matter what.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Craig asked when Justin walked away from him.

“Leave me alone, Dad,” Justin said, he needed to get out of there. “I have to go.”

“We haven’t finish talking,” Craig pointed out.

Justin was scratching under his left eye as he grinned. His father didn’t give up that easily after all. “You want me to go to the house and I’m not going. You have to open your eyes and see that I’m not you.”

“What?” Craig shook his head. “I don’t want you to be me.”

“Why not?” Justin asked. “You want the perfect son so Daddy is proud and zero disappointments,” the words tasted bitter in his mouth. “Just like your relationship with your own father.”

“It’s not like that,” Craig said. “My father wanted a different life for me and it didn’t go that way.”

Justin looked at his father. “Did he make you miserable?”

“Oh yeah,” Craig laughed remembering when he was younger and fought with his father all the time.

“Great,” Justin said as he reached the door. “It’s family tradition.”

Craig frowned and opened his mouth to say to Justin that this was his house but stopped. He let his son go and then closed his eyes. A tear escaping him knowing that he would never get to change the blond just like his own father never could change him. Now it was his turn to deal with that and accept Justin like he was.

***

_When you drink it makes you angry  
When I drink I want you more and more and more_

“You drink like a fish,” Brian said as he sat next to Justin.

“Fuck off,” Justin told him.

“So what happened now?” Brain asked.

“What makes you think that something happened?” Justin waved at the bartender for another drink.

“You’re getting drunk,” Brian pointed out.

Justin just stayed silent. He didn’t want to deal with Brian at that particular moment.

“Who is driving you home?” Brian asked.

“Since when the fuck did you decided that talking to me sounded like a good idea?” Justin asked. “I thought that I didn’t exist for you.”

“I can see you clearly now,” Brian told him.

Justin drank the last of his whisky and got up. “I can’t drive myself home perfectly okay.” He paid what he owed and started walking away.

Brian went after him. He sighed when Justin and him where in front of the blond’s Jeep. Justin let the keys drop to the floor and Brian picked them up.

“Give them back,” Justin slurred.

“I’ll drive,” Brian told him.

“You’ve been drinking too,” Justin spat out. He knew that neither one of them should be driving. But at that moment all Justin cared about was that he didn’t want to be sitting in the Jeep next to Brian.

“I drank less that you,” Brian opened the door. “Get in.”

Justin climbed in the Jeep.

“Keep going,” Brian said nodding towards the passenger’s seat.

“This is my car!” Justin shouted. “I’m not playing, Brian.”

“Move your butt!” Brian hissed back and pushed Justin. When he finally god inside he drove out of there.

“What about your car?” Justin asked after a while.

“No one is going to touch it,” Brian told him.

Justin kept quiet. He hated when Brian thought he could tell him what to do in his life.

“Here we are,” Brian told him parking the Jeep.

“This is the loft,” Justin muttered.

“I know,” Brian told him getting out. He walked to Justin’s side and helped the blond get out of the Jeep.

“I don’t want to be here,” Justin didn’t think he would be able to say no to the brunet.

“Just until you can drive,” Brian said. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Justin told him and walked towards the end of the elevator.

“I’m your friend, you know,” Brian bit his lower lip and shrugged. “Maybe I could help.”

Justin stared at the brunet. “I...I was talking to my father.”

“Oh,” Brian hated the way that Justin got when Craig was involved. He should have known. It was the same when he had contact with Jack. “What did he tell you?”

Justin shook his head. “It’s the fact that I’ve realized that I’m a total disappointment to him.”

Brian walked over to Justin. “Fuck that. You’re fucking wonderful.”

Justin got away from Brian and lifted the doors once they arrived at their floor. Justin walked to the metal gray door. Brian took out his keys and opened it.

“I’ll just go sit here,” Justin said as he sat on the sofa. He felt desperate and trapped being there. He got up and walked to the mini bar.

“Justin,” Brian said sternly. “Don’t.”

“Fuck off,” Justin hissed.

Brian walked over to him and grabbed the bottle away from the blond brusquely.

Justin tried to reach for it. “Don’t be a fucking asshole!”

Brian pushed him away with one arm. Justin growled and pushed Brian against the wall.

“Are you going to hit me, Sunshine?” Brian asked.

“Don’t call me that!” Justin yelled.

“Why?” Brian asked coming really close to Justin’s face.

Justin took a deep breath. Brian’s breath on his face was lethal for him. He felt his cock hardening and he tried the best he could to control himself.

Brian didn’t try for any sort of control. He just kissed the blond. His free arm wrapped around Justin’s waist and he started to push them back. Along the way he managed to put the bottle in some kind of surface before he kept pushing them into the bedroom.

Justin moaned and his fingers wrapped around Brian’s hair. He knew he should be pulling back but it felt so good. He didn’t give a fuck as to what they were doing; he just went along with it.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed as he fought with his pants. He felt Justin’s fingers helping him.

Then they moved to Justin’s pants. They each took off their shirts and then stopped and looked at each other

“You’re nothing but an asshole!” Justin hissed.

“Fuck you Justin,” Brian told him.

Then they were back to kissing each other and moaning. Justin turned them around and started kissing Brian’s neck. He sucked Brian’s nipple into his mouth making Brian tremble under him. He pulled back and crawled towards the bowl of condoms.

Brian took the opportunity to turn them around. Justin bit Brian’s chest and the brunet moaned and pulled back. Justin got on top of him again. Brian watched him open the condom and he couldn’t stop him. He wanted Justin however he could get him.

Justin pulled Brian’s legs up to his shoulders and positioned himself at the man’s entrance. He pushed inside of him not stopping.

“Fuck,” Brian’s body tensed.

Justin stopped and stared at him. His head slowly moved towards Brian’s. He kissed the brunet slowly, his tongue slipping inside Brian’s mouth. They moaned into the kiss as Justin’s hips moved slowly. He closed his eyes losing himself in Brian.

Brian didn’t want the feeling to be over. He felt his cock trapped in between them and he fought to keep control. He opened his eyes and stared at Justin. He knew the blond was everywhere inside of him. Justin was part of him, his mind, his heart and he couldn’t stop it.

“Ahh,” Justin’s face was now on Brian’s neck. He wanted to stay inside of Brian forever, just disappear inside the brunet. One of his hands came behind Brian’s neck and he started to fuck Brian harder.

“Fuck me,” Brian hissed as his arms wrapped around the blond.

The two of them exploded at the same time. Justin feeling the condom to capacity while Brian’s cum hit both of their skins.

“Jesus,” Justin dropped on top of Brian. “Fuck!”

Brian stayed quiet.

“I have to go,” Justin said as he rolled away from Brian. He got rid of the condom and got up from the bed.

Brian sat up and watched the blond grabbing his clothes. “Stay.”

“What the hell for?” Justin asked mad as hell.

“You’re still drunk,” Brian told him.

“I’m fine!” Justin shouted.

“I’m sorry,” Brian told him. “We shouldn’t have done this.”

“I know,” Justin told him. He walked to the living room with his things. His hands were shaking as he put his clothes on. He felt like he was going to explode at any minute.

Brian walked over to where Justin was pretending like he didn’t care one way or another if Justin left. The truth was that he was dying to hold Justin in his arms and didn’t want him to leave. “Are you sure you can drive?”

“I fucked you,” Justin told him putting his shirt. “Did that just fine!”

Brian glared at the blond. “Then get the fuck out.”

“Fuck off,” Justin told him and walked to the door. He looked back at Brian and wanted to punch him. He shook his head and left.

Brian stayed there feeling very cold. He took a deep breath and turned to take a shower. He wasn’t going to care about what had happened between them.

***

_And everyone here knows, everyone here  
Is thinking about somebody else_

Brian entered Woody’s and saw Michael right away with some guy. He walked over to them with a smirk in place.

“Brian,” Michael said when he saw his friend.

“Who is this, Mikey?” Brian asked as he put his arm around Michael’s shoulder.

“Who are you?” David asked.

“None of your business,” Brian told him.

“Brian,” Michael whined. “This is David. He’s my date.”

“You’re into old men now?” Brian asked looking at Michael.

“Don’t listen to him,” Michael said, the words hissing out of his mouth. “He’s drunk.”

“And high,” Brian added.

“You just got here,” Michael pointed out.

“I was at other places,” Brian told him.

“Hello boys,” Emmett said as he came towards them with Ted.

“David these are my friends,” Michael said. “Emmett and Ted.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Emmett told him.

Brian rolled his eyes and turned his back on them and faced towards the bar. He asked for a beer and that’s when he heard Justin’s voice. He turned around and saw Justin kissing Emmett on the lips.

“How are you doing?” Justin asked.

“I’m great,” Emmett told him. “And you?”

“Fantastic,” Justin’s eyes landed on Brian.

They stared at each other for a few seconds before Michael got in their line of view. “David this is Justin. He’s one of Brian’s tricks but he never went away.”

“Yes,” Justin said grabbing David’s hand to shake it. “I’m the one that got fucked by him and got to fuck him. Something that Mikey always wanted and still dreams of.”

“Fuck you,” Michael told him.

Brian grinned and turned his back on them again. He loved Justin’s sense of humor and how he would never let anyone step all over him.

“Brian, tell him to get the fuck away,” Michael hissed.

“It’s a free country, Mikey,” Brain told him turning around with a beer in hand. He walked over to Justin and gave it to him.

Justin took it. “Thanks.”

“Don’t we get drinks too?” Michael asked mad.

“Well,” Brian said. “Emmett and Ted have drinks and you have a date to buy you one.”

Justin grinned and drank from his beer.

“Justin!” Richard said as he walked over to the blond. “Hey.”

Justin turned his head to look at the teen. He smirked at him. “Well, well, well.”

“And who the fuck is this?” Brian asked as he looked at Richard.

“My stalker,” Justin said as he looked at the teen.

Richard swallowed and stayed close. “How have you been?”

“Good,” Justin told him. “You said hi, now you can run away.”

Brian was staring daggers at Richard. He wanted the man to be gone.

“Look,” Justin looked at the teen. “I’m not going to be your boyfriend or anything like that. So what could you want from me?”

“To fuck,” Richard smiled.

Justin’s cock twitched and smirked. “You’re kind of cute.”

Richard smiled from ear to ear.

“Aren’t you a little young?” Brian asked.

“You know how it is,” Justin said grabbing Richard by the belt. “Out with the old, in with the new.”

Brian was beyond pissed. He walked away pissed as hell and stopped when a guy made a bee-line for him. They exchanged a few lines and disappeared.

Justin had watched it and was angry but he didn’t let it show. “Well boys. Have a good night. I’m sure going to.”

“I can’t stand him,” Michael said.

“He’s alright,” David told him. He thought about what Justin had said and wondered if it was true that Michael wanted Brian.

“Let’s go to Babylon,” Michael said.

“I don’t know,” David told him. “I don’t go to those kinds of places anymore.”

“Come on,” Michael smiled, “it’s going to be so much fun.”

David nodded and gave in to Michael.

“Bye guys,” Ted told them.

“Have fun,” Emmett waved.

“I don’t think that’s the guy for Michael,” Ted said to Emmett.

“Oh,” Emmett finished his drink. “Why is that?”

“Uh, he’s too old,” Ted said quickly.

“I’m sure that’s it,” Emmett smirked.

“What are we going to do?” Ted asked.

“We’ll go to Babylon in a while,” Emmett looked at Ted. “Don’t you think all of this was funny?”

“What?” Ted asked.

“Well,” Emmett said. “David is pinning away for Michael who in turn wants Brian who wants Justin. Richard is pinning away for Justin who wants Brian and none of them are together.”

“That’s so fuck up,” Ted said shaking his head. “I’m going to the bathroom.”

Emmett nodded and watched him go. He smirked because he kept to himself that Ted was craving Michael and that he particularly wouldn’t mind getting a piece of David.


	8. Admitting It Is The First Step

_This is your life, is it everything that you dreamed  
That it would be when the world was younger_

Craig opened the door and came face to face with his son. “Justin.”

“Can I still come in?” Justin asked.

“Yes,” Craig stepped aside with happiness in his heart. He wanted to fix things between his son and him. “Your mother and I were just starting dinner.”

Justin walked to the dinning room where his mother got up quickly and went to hug him and kiss him.

“Sit down,” Jennifer told him. “I’ll get you a plate.”

Justin and Craig sat in the table.

“How are you doing?” Craig asked him.

“Good,” Justin told him. He didn’t know why the fuck he had come in the first place.

Jennifer put the plate on the table along with the utensils and smiled at him. Justin reached for the salad bowl and started serving himself.

“I’m so happy that you decided to come,” Jennifer told him. “Your father said that you weren’t sure if you were free.”

Justin looked at his father who was chewing on his food very slowly. He understood that his father hadn’t wanted to disappoint his wife. He was glad that he had come over after all.

“So how’s work?” Jennifer asked.

“I quit,” Justin told her.

“You what?” Craig was shocked. He just saw Justin digging himself a hole deeper into the ground. He wanted his son to triumph not the other way around.

“I didn’t like it,” Justin shrugged. “I have enough money in the bank Dad. Plus I decided to paint full time. Painting offers me a lot of more money and I enjoy it.”

Jennifer nodded at her son. She was behind him one hundred percent. “As long as you’re happy, Justin.”

Justin looked at his plate. He just had finished serving himself all that his mother had cooked. He really wasn’t that hungry.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” Jennifer asked her son and took a sip of her wine.

Justin sighed and looked at her with annoyance. “No, I don’t Mom.”

Craig felt uncomfortable talking about Justin’s lifestyle. He really didn’t care if his son was with someone else. He just couldn’t stand to know that Justin was gay. He was trying his best but it was so hard.

“What about Brian?” Jennifer asked. “He seemed like a nice man.”

Justin wanted to just die. He looked at his father who looked kind of pale. “Can we talk about something else? Please?”

“I just want to know,” Jennifer told him. “We barely talk,” she couldn’t help but think that she had lost her son and she was partly to blame for the loss. Maybe she hadn’t tried hard enough to stay in contact with her baby.

“Well, there is nothing to talk about,” Justin told her. “Brian and I are just...friends.”

“He’s not good enough for you,” Craig muttered.

Justin looked at his father. He sighed and he just knew that his father had checked Brian out. He hated that his father did that all the time. He wasn’t a baby; he knew what he was doing.

“Why not?” Jennifer asked. “I met him. I think he was nice and very handsome too.”

Justin smirked at his mother.

“Don’t talk about him, Jen,” Craig told her his voice was dry and tight.

“Why not?” Justin asked.

“This is not what we’re here for,” Craig said.

“I thought we were getting up to date in my life,” Justin said. “Because this is my life, Dad. I’m not going to change. I’m not going to wake up suddenly and be straight and come to the family dinners and talk about women. It’s not going to happen so just accept me how I am!”

Craig dropped his fork and got up from the table. He shook his head and left.

“Ugh!” Justin got up as well.

“Justin,” Jennifer walked after him. “You haven’t eaten.”

“I lost my appetite,” Justin told her as he opened the door. He was so angry with his father and with himself. He didn’t know why he put himself in situations where his father could drive him out off his mind.

“Justin, stop!” Jennifer yelled.

Justin turned around and stared at his mother. He could see how distraught she looked. He sighed and knew it wasn’t her fault.

“I love you,” Jennifer said. “And I’m sorry that you’re having so many problems with your father but I’m not him. I accept you, Justin. You’re my son.”

Justin’s eyes watered a bit but he looked away. He really had pushed his whole family away. “I’m going to call you, Mom.”

“No,” Jennifer told him. “It’s not the same. It’s not enough.”

Justin sighed and stayed silent.

“How about if we meet tomorrow?” Jennifer asked. “I want to spend time with you.”

Justin nodded slowly and walked up to her. He kissed her on the cheek and grinned. “But you’re paying because I’m a starving artist now.”

“Little rascal,” Jennifer swatted him in the arm. “I’ll let you know where we’re going.”

Justin nodded and walked to his car. He decided to go see Daphne. He had abandoned her and he was sure that she was more than pissed.

“Oh, so you’re not dead,” Daphne said as Justin appeared in her living room.

“What can I say?” Justin smirked. “Hell won’t have me.”

Daphne rolled her eyes. “You’re an asshole. You left me waiting for you.”

“I had some problems,” Justin told her.

Daphne sat down next to him. “With who?”

“My father,” Justin muttered.

“Oh,” Daphne shook her head. She looked at the blond and wondered why Justin became so vulnerable when it came to his father. He was so tough in everything else but maybe underneath it all it was one big show.

“I had dinner today with my parents,” Justin told her.

“And you didn’t tell me?” Daphne asked.

“I thought you would tell me to fuck off,” Justin sighed as he threw his head back. “Remind me not to do that again.”

“I will,” Daphne rested her head on his shoulder. “What happened?”

“My father can’t accept me, what else is new?” Justin asked.

“Why did you go?” Daphne asked him.

“Because I’m an idiot,” Justin told her. “Jesus, Mom started asking about Brian and it all went to hell from there.”

“Oh,” Daphne muttered. “So talking about Brian...”

“Don’t change the subject Daphne,” Justin told her.

“I just think you should see him,” Daphne knew her friend well enough to know that the blond wanted to be with Brian. “That’s all.”

“We’re just friends,” Justin repeated for the second time in one day.

“You’re going to die all alone if you keep this up,” Daphne pulled away. “Is that what you want?”

“Let’s not start this,” Justin got up. He would go home where no one would bother him.

“Oh, how the truth hurts,” Daphne grinned.

“Fuck you, Daph!” Justin hissed. “I didn’t want this. I...I was fine with him and how things were going. He was the one that pulled back. So fuck him.”

“This is not how it was supposed to go,” Daphne said.

Justin frowned as he looked at her.

“I remember you used to tell me how you were going to live in a big house and have many kids and a husband that loved you,” Daphne hoped that one day Justin would find those things. She wanted him to be happy.

“Well,” Justin ran his fingers through his hair. “I grew up, Daphne. I saw the world how it really is and the truth is that I don’t want that anymore.”

Daphne felt her heart breaking for him. She didn’t know if it was true or if Justin was lying.

“I’m going to go,” Justin turned around and left. He didn’t leave her time to say anything more. When he was outside the apartment door he went down the stairs in record time. Then he reached his car and got inside. He was going home but he stayed there thinking about what Daphne had said. He thought about how the world went in circles and how things changed no matter what.

***

_This will all fall down_  
Like everything else that was  
This too shall pass and all the  
Words she said we can’t take back 

Brian was sitting in one of the booths staring at his coffee. He didn’t know what the fuck he was doing there.

“Brian,” Michael said.

Brian smiled a bit to himself, unconsciously he had been waiting for Michael. “Hey, Mikey.”

“Are you okay?” Michael asked. “You look kind of down.”

“Hard day at the office,” Brian told him.

“That sucks,” Michael looked around for his mother. “So, what are we doing tonight?”

Brian shrugged.

“We can go to Babylon,” Michael said excited. He loved it when Brian and him danced. He couldn’t wait to be close to the man yet again.

“Sure,” Brian took out his wallet and put a few bills on the table. “I’ll go change.”

“I can’t go to the loft for awhile,” Michael told him. “If you wait for me I can go with you.”

“That’s okay,” Brian told him as he got up. “Just meet me there.”

“Okay,” Michael smiled and waved.

Brian arrived at the loft and the last thing he wanted to do was go to Babylon but he had told Michael they would so he had to. When he closed the door and turned Justin was sitting on the sofa with beer in hand and smoking his weed.

“Hello, Brian,” Justin said.

“What are you doing here?” Brian asked.

Justin shrugged and stayed sitting. He could tell that Brian was in a bad mood. Cynthia was right when she had called him. He smiled a bit thinking that there must be a reason that Cynthia thought he was the one person indicated to handle Brian.

“This is my fucking loft,” Brian hissed. “And that’s my beer and my stash.”

“I know,” Justin told him smiling. “Want some?”

Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’re fucking insane. What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I was feeling a bit out of it,” Justin told him and looked at Brian. “Being here calms me down.”

Brian just sat down and took the blunt away from Justin’s hands. He took a long drag from it and then leaned back slowly.

“There, there,” Justin got up and went to get a beer for the brunet.”

“What are you doing here?” Brian asked him once again.

“I already told you,” Justin answered. He opened the beer and came back with it. “There you go.”

Brian grabbed it and stayed silent. Justin watched him for a few seconds trying to figure out what was happening with Brian. He put his beer on the coffee table and Brian started bitching about using a coaster. Justin got on his knees and put his hands on Brian’s thighs.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked but didn’t make a move to get away. He just stared at the man and really hoped that Justin’s intention was to start sucking him and not praying. He took a long drag from the blunt before he put it away.

Quietly Justin reached for Brian’s crotch, taking his eyes away from Brian while he took the man’s growing erection out of its confines. He licked his lips and he looked up at Brian. He asked silently for permission although he had gained that the minute he had gotten on his knees.

Justin licked the tip of Brian’s cock and he felt himself getting harder. His tongue ran across Brian’s head and then down the hard shaft. Brian threw his head back and gripped the beer in his hand. He dreamt of Justin’s mouth every night and he didn’t want to wake up if it was one of those dreams. His eyes opened when he heard Justin undoing his own pants. Brian’s mouth watered and he imagined Justin’s taste in every recess in his mouth.

The smaller man’s nimble fingers and palm massaged Brian’s sac. He stopped jerking off as he grabbed Brian’s hips to keep him in place. He started to take Brian all the way in and humming around Brian’s cock.

“Fuck,” Brian bit his lower lip and thought of something else to keep from exploding. He didn’t want it to be too soon. His fingers twisted in Justin’s hair. No one could work him as well as the blond.

Justin’s hand moved to Brian’s balls again but then it reached for more. He managed to rub his fingers around Brian’s hole at the same time his tongue fucked Brian’s piss hole.

“Fuck!” Brian hissed as he shot his cum inside Justin’s mouth.

Justin swallowed every drop as if his life depended on it. He pulled back and stared at Brian watching the man’s skin glow. He wanted Brian at that precise moment. He wanted to possess the taller man and never let him go. He quickly got up not sure why he was having those thoughts. It was Daphne’s fault he deduced and wondered how he could think of that woman or any woman for that matter at a time like that.

Brian opened his eyes and closed his mouth. He felt a bit shaky so he stayed put and watched Justin’s erection. Justin grabbed the beer away from Brian and took a sip from it. He got really close to the sofa and pull Brian by the back of the head.

“Suck me,” Justin told him and Brian did.

Brian held the blond by his hips as he sucked on the blond’s cock head. He knew Justin wasn’t going to last long so he went straight to deep throat the man. Justin hips started to move on their own accord and he couldn’t help but to fuck Brian’s mouth. His free hand held on to Brian’s shoulder so he just wouldn’t fall down.

Brian didn’t have to wait long to taste the blond’s cum. He swallowed every bit and licked Justin clean. When he pulled back Justin was staring at him like he was about to eat him.

“That was great,” Brian commented.

“I know,” Justin told him putting the beer on the coffee table next to his.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked.

Justin zipped his pants quickly. “I have to go.”

Brian stayed silent. He didn’t know what to think. One minute Justin was giving him so much and the next he was taking everything away. They shouldn’t have been sucking each other in the first place.

Justin leaned closer to Brian and kissed him. “If you need anything call me.”

Brian stared at the blond like he was from another planet. He didn’t want to feel Justin so close to him. He didn’t want to need the blond for anything. He hated that Justin could kiss him like that and he hated that Justin could walk away from him without feeling like his world was about to crumble.

“Remember that parents are always trying to do what’s best for you even when they’re oh so fucking wrong,” Justin told him.

Brian looked up. “How did you know?”

“I know you,” Justin shrugged. “They’re the only people that can get through to you and hurt you.”

Brian was thinking that Justin could get to him and hurt him but no one had to know that. He just kept quiet.

“Later,” Justin told him and walked to the door. When he opened Michael was standing there with Emmett.

“What are you doing here?” Michael asked.

Justin smirked. It was just too easy to play with Michael and he couldn’t help it. It was like the man’s look alone made him do it. “You know how it goes. I was helping Brian feel a lot better.”

“What’s wrong with him?” Emmett asked.

“Nothing now,” Justin said as he left.

Michael and Emmett looked at Brian who was sitting on the sofa with his eyes closed and his head thrown back. By the looks of him they could tell what he and Justin had been doing. The taller man was oblivious to them as he thought of Justin even though “he was trying very hard not to”. Emmett was smirking as he walked inside the loft.

Michael on the other hand stood there watching Brian for a few more seconds. His knuckles were turning white as he fisted his hands. He knew he had to come up with something to keep Brian and Justin away from each other.

***

_The way I hurt myself again  
Just to get back at you_

“What do you want to eat?” Daphne asked as she walked with Justin.

“I already ate,” Justin looked around the streets. “With Mom.”

“Really,” Daphne muttered. “You have to tell me all about it as we eat.”

“I...” Justin sighed. “I want Chinese.”

Daphne nodded and they kept walking down the street. Close to the end of the block was a little restaurant. She knew that he probably had played with his food while his mother and him talked. And even if it wasn’t like that Justin was a bottomless pit.

“I want to know everything about it,” Daphne told him.

“Well,” Justin started to tell her but grabbed his phone as he felt it vibrating. He looked at the number and stopped walking.

“Who is it?” Daphne asked.

“Brian,” Justin said. “Fuck.”

“Answer it,” Daphne told him.

Justin wasn’t sure what to do. He wanted nothing more than to talk with Brian, to be with him and spend time with him. But he didn’t want things to get weird between them again. He was fine with letting Brian do whatever he wanted, except treating him like a fucking rag doll.

“Justin,” Daphne’s voice made it to the blond’s ear.

Justin blinked and hit the answer button. “Hello?”

“Justin,” Brian’s husky voice was heard.

“Brian,” Justin never thought it would feel like that. But his heart actually fell to the floor and back. Now his heartbeat was a mile per minute. “Are you okay?”

Brian cleared his throat. “I’m at the hospital.”

Justin closed his eyes and waited. He wasn’t going to freak out. “What’s going on?”

“It’s Michael,” Brian told him. “I’m okay.”

“What happened to him?” Justin asked relieved that Brian was okay.

“He had an accident,” Brian informed him. “I wanted to let you know in case you wanted to see him.”

“I’m on my way,” Justin assured him.

“You don’t have to,” Brian reminded him.

“I’ll be there,” Justin looked at Daphne and pointed at the yellow cab.

Daphne nodded and went to get them one. Justin walked behind her at a slower pace.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked.

“Of course,” Brian closed his eyes. “I’m going to go. I need to be here for him, later.”

“Later,” Justin closed the phone and got in the cab where Daphne was waiting.

“Where to?” the driver asked.

“The general hospital,” Justin told him.

“What’s going on, Justin?” Daphne asked.

“Michael got hurt,” Justin sighed. “He had some kind of accident. Brian didn’t tell me.”

“My god,” Daphne commented. “Is he okay?”

“Well, he didn’t say that Michael was dead,” Justin said.

“And he called you?” Daphne asked.

“He sounded upset,” Justin told her. “And he called me.”

Daphne smiled at that. She knew that Justin wasn’t friends with Michael. Justin was always complaining about Michael or making fun of the man. She was sure that Brian was well aware of that, so she was sure when she said that Brian needed Justin as much as the blond needed the other man.

“We’re here,” the driver told them.

Justin gave him the money and didn’t wait for his change. He walked with Daphne inside the emergency room and they spotted David right away. David saw them and walked towards them.

“Hi,” Justin pushed his sleeves back. “What happened?”

“Michael fell down the stairs at home,” David told him. “He broke his right leg and injured his back. Plus he has a contusion on his head and his hip.”

“Fuck,” Justin said. “Did you get to see him?”

David nodded and looked back. “Debbie is sitting in there with Brian and Vic.”

“Okay,” Justin didn’t wait any longer and went to see Brian.

“I need some fresh air,” David said as he looked at Daphne.

Daphne put her hand on his arm and gave him an encouraging grip before she followed Justin. She saw the blond hugging Debbie and talking to her. Daphne walked over to Brian and kissed him on the cheek.

“Hey,” Daphne smiled. “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine,” Brian told her.

“How long have you guys been here?” Justin asked as he sat in between Vic and Brian.

“Hours,” Debbie took a deep breath. “My baby is going to be okay.”

“Thank god,” Vic said. He couldn’t believe that Michael almost killed himself. “It was a nasty fall.”

“But how did it happen?” Justin asked.

“David said that one minute Michael was okay and the next thing he knew he saw Michael falling,” Brian cleared his throat.

“I think you should go home,” Debbie said looking at Brian. “He’s okay now. You guys don’t have to be here.”

“Its okay Deb,” Justin told her as he got up. “Is he in that room?” he nodded towards it.

“Yeah,” Debbie said.

Justin put his hand on the back of Brian’s head and scratched him gently. Brian looked up and smiled briefly at him. Justin winked at the brunet before he went to see Michael.

“What are you doing here?” Michael asked in a snarl when he saw the blond.

“Brian called me,” Justin looked at Michael and shook his head. “Damn.”

“What?” Michael asked.

“You’re pretty banged up,” Justin said. “How are you feeling?”

“What do you care?” Michael asked. “Leave me the fuck alone.”

Justin wished that the man would stop being so hostile around him. He knew that they would never be the best of friends and that most of the time they were arguing but at that precise moment he was trying to be nice.

“Get the fuck out of my room,” Michael told him.

“What?” Justin asked. “I’m here to see that you’re okay. Brian is really worried.”

Michael smiled at the thought of Brian. He knew it had been worth it. “I know. Now he’s going to take care of me.”

“You have David to do that,” Justin didn’t like the way Michael’s face twisted. He felt the hairs on the back of his neck standing up.

“Brian is my best friend,” Michael said. “He loves me and he’s going to be with me so I can get better.”

Justin moved closer to Michael. He watched the man for a few minutes and had to ask or he would explode. “Did you throw yourself down the stairs to get Brian’s attention?”

Michael froze for an instant but it was more than enough to let Justin know that it was true. He couldn’t believe it. He knew that Michael had a crush on Brian but he didn’t think the obsession was of that magnitude.

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed. “Leave me alone and tell Brian that I need him here.”

Justin shook his head. “Fuck you! How can you do that to a person? To everyone? They’re worried sick for you and you did this on purpose. You’re sick.”

“Fuck you,” Michael told him and then shrugged. “I got what I wanted and they will not believe you if you decide to say anything.”

Justin had no intention of telling anyone. He knew that it was hard to believe and he didn’t want them to know about it. It would crush their hearts, he was pretty sure. The only thing he didn’t want was Michael manipulating Brian.

“Now go,” Michael told him calmly.

Justin nodded as he took a few steps back. He knew two could play the same game. “I’ll go. I mean someone needs to help Brian out. I’m here to give him my support,” Justin shrugged and shook his head. “He will need me now that his friend is in such a bad shape. He must be feeling so awful that he couldn’t do more.”

Michael shook his head. “Just leave me alone. Brian!”

Justin took a step back and shook his head. Brian definitely needed to find himself new friends.

“What’s going on?” Debbie asked as she came in after hearing Michael.

“I don’t want him here,” Michael hissed.

“I’ll just go,” Justin said. He left the room quickly.

“Michael,” Debbie said practically running up to her son. “He’s came to see that you were okay. He’s such a nice guy.”

“I don’t want him here,” Michael said again. “Can you please bring Brian here?”

“Does something hurt?” Debbie asked.

“Ma,” Michael whined. “Tell Brian to come here.”

Debbie went out to see Brian getting up and stretching.

“We’re going to the diner,” Daphne said. “We convinced Brian to go. He looks like he could use some food.”

“That’s good,” Debbie told them. They had been there since the afternoon and now it was almost nightfall.

Brian had not moved from that spot.

“I don’t know,” Brian said. “Mikey needs me.”

“He’s fine,” Debbie said. “You can come back later. He’ll understand that you need to take care of yourself too.”

At that moment David came back.

“He has David,” Debbie said.

Brian nodded and looked at Justin. “Okay.”

Justin looked at Vic. “You can come with us?”

“Can you drop me home?” Vic asked. “I’m kind of tired.”

“I didn’t bring my car,” Justin told him.

“We can take a cab,” Daphne said.

“Here,” David said. “You can use my car. You’re coming back, right?”

Justin took the keys and nodded.

Debbie was happy that Justin was helping them. The blond had certain magnetism that you couldn’t say no to him. “Be careful.”

“I’m going to bring us some coffee, Deb,” David told her walking away.

Debbie walked back to the room to check on Michael.

“Ma, where is Brian?” Michael asked.

“He left,” Debbie said. “He has to eat something.”

“What?” Michael asked. “He left me?”

“David is here and so am I. Justin convinced Brian that he needed to eat something. He’s such a good boy,” Debbie smiled. “They will be back later.”

“Ahhh!” Michael screamed and hit the bed.

“Are you hurt baby?” Debbie asked as soon as he saw the tears. “Where does it hurt?”

At the time the only place that Michael was hurting was his heart.

***

_I bet you’re hard to get over  
I bet the room just won’t shine_

Brian opened his eyes when he heard someone opening the lock. He heard the door being thrown shut and that’s pretty much when he realized it wasn’t the door to the loft. He sat up and looked around and wondered when he had gotten there.

Justin came into the bedroom and looked at Brian. “Hey,” he walked over to the closet and pulled out a shirt. “I came from the hospital. They’re letting Michael go in the morning.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Brian asked.

Justin shrugged. “I had to take Daphne home. You were exhausted and I let you sleep. Then I went to drop David’s car off and took a cab back home,” he informed him as he took a pair of underwear from the drawer.

Brian remembered they had come to the blond’s apartment after having dropped Vic. They had eaten something and then had a few drinks. He remembered walking to the bed and after that he didn’t remember much. He rubbed his face and sighed.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked when Justin started to strip down.

“I’m going to take a shower,” Justin told him. “Are you hungry? There still food in the fridge. You barely ate.”

Brian shook his head. Justin shrugged and walked to take a shower. When he came back he had a towel around his waist. He grabbed the shirt he had taken from the closet and put it on.

“I should go,” Brian told him.

“Fine,” Justin said and sat in the bed to dry his feet and thighs to put on his briefs.

Brian stared at Justin’s back and smiled. “That’s mine.”

Justin looked back and then at his shirt. “Yeah so?”

“Well, it’s mine,” Brian told him.

“Do you want me to take it off?” Justin arched a brow.

Brian frowned. “You’re so fucking weird. You’re wearing my clothes.”

“I have clothes that have gone missing too,” Justin pointed out.

“Shut up,” Brian told him trying to sound indignantly. But he had stolen a sweater or two from the blond. He was fucking nuts as well. He would smell them and wouldn’t wash them wanting them to smell of the blond.

“Weren’t you leaving?” Justin asked.

Brian stayed silent. Justin looked back and arched a brow. “Brian? What are you going to do?”

“Yes,” Brian said.

“What?” Justin asked.

“I want my shirt back,” Brian told him.

Justin thought Brian was acting like a complete five year old. He was about to get up to find something else when Brian pulled him back.

“I want it now,” Brian told him in a husky voice.

Justin swallowed and slowly kneeled in front of Brian. “You want it?”

“Yes, please,” Brian said both of them pretending to be talking about the shirt.

Justin started to unbutton the shirt. He kept staring at Brian who wasn’t taking his eyes way from him. Brian was an impatient man so he just kneeled in the bed and pushed Justin back. He ripped the shirt open and stared at Justin’s cock. He grabbed it and started jerking him slowly.

Justin closed his eyes. “We’re not supposed to be doing this.”

“No,” Brian turned his head to look at Justin. He bent down and kissed him. His tongue vibrated with pleasure as Justin’s unique taste washed over the appendage.

Justin’s hand grabbed the back of Brian’s neck and kept him in place as he sucked Brian’s tongue with such fury that Brian pulled back scared.

“What are you doing?” Justin asked and stopped Brian’s hand from jerking him.

“Nothing,” Brian muttered as his other hand rested on Justin’s neck. His thumb moved slightly under the porcelain skin.

“I thought we agreed not to do this again,” Justin whispered closing his eyes. His heart was beating fast and he was feeling Brian. He was feeling the man in every inch of his body, in every organ, consuming his soul.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Brian told him. “We’re just friends.”

“You do this with all of your friends?” Justin asked smiling.

Brian got really close. His lips brushed against the blond’s. “Only the very special ones,” he muttered.

Justin could barely hear him. He smiled widely and opened his eyes. “Oh yeah?”

“Yes,” Brian said and kissed him. His mouth then moved to Justin’s neck and behind Justin’s ear.

“Fuck,” Justin growled. He knew that Brian knew his weak points.

Brian pulled back. “Give me a condom.”

“Umm,” Justin looked around. “There.”

Brian moved back and went to the dresser. He started opening the drawers. “Why do you keep moving them?”

“I don’t,” Justin hissed. “I buy them and wherever they end up that’s where they lay. Don’t you have one on you?”

Brian stared searching his pocket. “Oh fuck, I have one in my jacket.”

Justin groaned in frustration. When Brian came back he did so with a condom and sans his clothes. He got in the bed and put the condom on.

“Turn around,” Brian told him.

Justin did his eyes closing as he felt Brian’s hand on him.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard,” Brian growled.

“Then do it,” Justin told him. He moved onto his hands and knees.

Brian ripped the condom open and put it on. He placed his cock at Justin’s entrance and started to push inside. He closed his eyes and felt everything spinning around him. He felt like an inexperience kid at that moment.

Justin started moving of his own accord. “Fuck, Brian. Fuck me!”

“You seem to be doing fine by yourself,” Brian’s hands caressed Justin’s back. “Fuck yeah.”

Justin gripped the sheets and started to slam back into the brunet.

“Easy there,” Brian grabbed Justin’s hips. He took control of their pace and watched as Justin’s muscles rippled as they moved. He moved his hands to Justin’s globes and stretched them apart. He watched as his cock made in and out of Justin’s hole.

“Umm,” Justin was in heaven as Brian did whatever he wanted with him. He felt his shoulders being pushed down.

“Gripped it really hard,” Brian growled. “I want to feel you around me.”

“Oh,” Justin did and felt the man’s cock rubbing his prostate. “Ah, more!”

Brian gripped the back of Justin’s arms and fucked him hard. His forehead dropped on the back of Justin’s head. Their breathing was erratic as they bodies moved trying to reach the same goal. Their sweat mixed together and it smelled of nothing but pure sex in the room.

Justin reached for his cock and started jerking himself. Brian moved back and gripped Justin’s hips. He started to jab at Justin’s hole.

“Brian!” Justin moaned as his cum soaked the sheets. He squeezed Brian inside of him and felt the man shaking.

“Ah!” Brian growled hammering fast as he experienced his orgasm.

Brian stayed on top of Justin catching his breath. Justin did the same but once they were breathing normally none of them moved away. Brian started kissing Justin’s neck and the blond purred happily.

“We have to take a shower,” Brian muttered.

“I was clean,” Justin protested. “It’s your fault.”

Brian laughed and pulled away from Justin. The two of them went to the shower but didn’t stay long. Justin came out first and changed the bed covers. When Brian came out the blond was already in the bed naked. He got in the bed and they looked at each other.

They were both smiling and trying to hide it. Justin was the first to start touching the brunet. His hand caressed Brian’s skin. Brian started doing the same. Their heads came closer until they were kissing one another.

“How are you feeling?” Justin asked as he pulled back.

“Okay,” Brian thought about Michael briefly. “I’m okay.

“You know,” Justin said chuckled. “Your special friends are very lucky,” he informed the brunet as he wrapped himself on the sheets and then moved his head on top of Brian’s chest.

Brian looked at Justin and laughed a bit nervous. He threw an arm around Justin’s shoulder and shook his head. “So far,” he took a deep breath knowing fully well what he was saying. “Just one.”

Justin looked up at the brunet. He smiled from ear to ear and Brian saw his world shinning again.

***

_Feel the sun in your face_  
And tell me what you’re thinking  
Catch the snow on your tongue  
And show me how it tastes 

“Jesus fuck,” Brian watched as Justin finished his second plate. “What are you a vacuum?”

Justin stuck his tongue out at him and chuckled. “It was really good.”

“We can see that,” Melanie said.

“Leave space for dessert,” Lindsay told him. “I made apple pie from scratch.”

“It’s delicious,” Emmett said to Justin.

Justin looked at Debbie. “You’re great Deb. If I was straight I would marry you.”

Debbie laughed. “He’s amazing,” she grabbed the blond’s cheek. “Thank you, Sunshine.”

“Just for her food,” Ted laughed.

“It’s the way to a man’s heart,” Vic told them. “Remember that.”

“Brian doesn’t eat much,” Emmett commented. “How do you do it, Justin?”

“Well,” Justin said in the same sarcastic tone that Emmett used. “There are other things.”

“Like what?” Melanie rolled her eyes. She didn’t like Brian much and was starting to like Justin even less.

“My big cock up his ass,” Justin said.

“Jesus,” Lindsay said.

Debbie laughed and shook her head. “Sunshine.”

“Mine is bigger than yours,” Brian told him smirking. Justin smiled and he thought that sunshine was right; the blond’s smile could light up the room like the sun. Brian had missed that smile.

“You wish,” Justin told him.

“I can always help you guys measure,” Vic offered.

“Vic!” Debbie shrieked.

The whole table laughed about that.

“Here is the pie,” Debbie said putting it on the table before she went to get some plates.

“I’ll take Michael a piece,” Brian offered when they started cutting it.

“How much can you eat Justin?” Lindsay asked but before he could answer she cut a big piece for him. “Is that enough?”

“Yes,” Justin told her and took the plate to put it in front of him. He got up and excused himself to go to the bathroom really quick. He went up the stairs slowly.

“What the hell is going on, Brian?” Michael asked.

Justin was about to go into the bathroom but stopped. He moved closer to Michael’s room. The door was ajar so he kept where he was, scared that they might see him. He didn’t know why he was snooping around since he never did it but he wasn’t moving away.

“Michael,” Brian said pinching the bridge of his nose. “I came here to give you your fucking dessert.”

“I don’t want it,” Michael hissed. “I want to know what Justin is doing here. I heard Ma saying that you two were back together.”

“We’re not a fucking couple,” Brian hissed.

Justin nodded in agreement with what Brian was saying.

“Are you fucking him again?” Michael asked.

Brian nodded slowly.

“Then you guys are back together,” Michael said. “It doesn’t matter what you say or he says. You have this fucked up relationship and I...I...” he let out tears and then looked away from the brunet.

“You what?” Brian asked.

“Nothing,” Michael said. “I’m your friend, Brian. I just thought you would tell me that’s all.”

Justin wasn’t eating the lie and he was sure that Brian wasn’t either.

“Right,” Brian said knowing well enough that Michael was about to say something else.

Justin backed away slowly and as silent as possible. He went to the bathroom and while he was there he heard Brian go down the stairs. When he went back to the living room the brunet was nowhere to be found.

“He’s outside,” Emmett whispered to Justin as he passed him by.

Justin took a deep breath and sat down to eat his pie. When he was done Brian was still outside so he just went out to see if Brian was okay. “Hey,” he said as he stood next to the man.

“Hi,” Brian looked at him and then passed him the joint. Justin took it and they didn’t say anything else for a long time.

“We’re going to freeze to death here,” Brian commented.

“I know you wouldn’t let that happen,” Justin told him and smiled.

Brian put his forehead against Justin’s. He stared at the blond’s smile and ran his thumb over his man’s lips.

Justin arched a brow. “What?” he knew that Brian was cooking something up in his brain.

“Nothing,” Brian told him.

“What are you thinking?” Justin wrapped one of his arms around Brian’s waist. In the other one he held the blunt.

“I know you were there,” Brian said.

“Do you have eyes on your back or something?” Justin asked not denying it.

Brian shook his head. “I saw you through the mirror.”

“Oh,” Justin laughed about it.

“I don’t think Michael saw you,” Brian said as he took the blunt back from the blond.

Justin shrugged. “I don’t really care.”

“He’s right you know,” Brian said. “In a way...about us.”

“What are you talking about?” Justin asked. “All I heard was the tirade of a mad man heavily medicated.”

Brian frowned and looked away from Justin briefly. They had ended up in the place they had been trying to avoid. No matter how much he pulled away from the blond, it was hopeless.

Justin rolled his eyes. “Right, no bad talk about your best friend.”

Brian sighed not really caring what Justin was saying about Michael. He had more important things to think about at the moment. “It’s a fucking relationship.”

Justin stayed quiet after hearing those words. He wondered how it had happened. How it was that Brian became so important in his life when he hadn’t even been looking for the man in the first place.

“I never wanted this,” Brian said.

“Me neither,” Justin looked at Brian. “I...I still don’t think of this as a relationship.”

Brian felt the same way.

“We’re just having fun,” Justin assured Brian but he wasn’t so sure himself.

Brian threw the last of the weed on the floor and stepped over it. “We should go back. It’s starting to snow,” he said as he pulled away from Justin.

“Okay,” Justin told him but didn’t move towards the house.

When Brian turned to look at the blond he caught Justin sticking his tongue out to catch a snowflake. “You’re fucking nuts.”

“What?” Justin asked pretending to be shocked. “I used to do it when I was little. It tastes great.”

Brian smiled and got closer to the blond. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,” Justin muttered.

“I’ll have to try it,” Brian murmured as he leaned closer to Justin’s mouth. He caressed Justin’s lips with his thumb, a habit he had developed, and then kissed the blond.

When they pulled back they were both heavily panting. They were hard as a rock and when they looked around the floor was already covered with white snow.

“I care for you,” Justin whispered holding on to Brian.

“Me too,” Brian told him.

They wrapped their arms around each other tightly.

“So now what?” Justin asked meaning to what they were going to do with their fucked up relationship. Would they stay together and see what happened or just separate and go their own ways.

Brian rubbed his nose against Justin’s. “I have no fucking idea.”

Justin nodded sharing the feeling.


	9. An Unconventional Relationship

_You speak to me in riddles_  
And you speak to me in rhymes  
My body aches to breathe your breath  
Your words keep me alive 

Justin woke up to find Brian’s arm on top of him holding him in place. He smiled before he got up to go to the bathroom. He walked to the kitchen and started to prepare some hot chocolate. He walked over to his studio and looked around. He only had one painting left to take to the gallery where the exhibition was going to take place.

“Justin,” Brian called from the living room.

Justin came out of his study and walked over to the brunet. “What is it?”

“Come back to the bed,” Brian told him putting his arm around the blond’s waist.

“I have to do some stuff,” Justin told him. “Are you going to come to the show?”

“No,” Brian said. “I have things to do.”

“Like what?” Justin asked arching a brow.

Brian pulled away. “I’m going to let you do whatever you have to do.”

Justin smirked. “You just don’t want to be seen with me so people won’t think we are together.”

“I’m not your boyfriend,” Brian shouted back.

Justin rolled his eyes. He went back to his study and took the painting that he was supposed to take to the gallery to put it inside the box for protection. When that was done he went to drink a cup of hot chocolate. Then he went to the bathroom where he watched Brian in the shower.

“What are you doing out there?” Brian asked after a while of waiting for the blond. “Are you coming inside or what?”

“I’m fine here,” Justin told him watching him.

Brian finished his shower and came out. He kissed Justin and then left. Justin took a shower by himself and when he came out the brunet was gone. He got dressed and then grabbed the painting to take it with him. Before he got to the gallery he stopped at a Starbucks and got some bagels and coffees.

“Justin,” Pat said as she stood next to the blond.

“I brought some food,” Justin said putting it down. “Where do you want this?”

“Finally,” Pat laughed. “Come on. We’ll give it to Jess and she’ll know what to do with it.”

Justin did and then he and Pat went to walk around the gallery.

“So, how is your life going?” Pat asked.

“Okay,” Justin told her.

“Have you met anyone?” Pat asked the question almost laughing because she always did and she knew the answer by heart now.

“Well,” Justin shrugged. “You know me.”

“Whoa,” Pat said. “What kind of answer is that? What happen to ‘I don’t do boyfriends’? Justin, what’s going on?”

Justin and her spend the rest of the day talking about what he had going on with Brian. After that he went to spend some time with Daphne. They ended up at his apartment so he could get ready.

“You take so much time getting ready,” Daphne said as she entertained herself looking at a magazine.

“I do not,” Justin told her. “We are so late. We have to go to your house and then I have to wait for you.”

“I can’t,” Daphne told him. “I have a date.”

“Then take him to the gallery when you are done,” Justin told her.

“Fine,” Daphne said. “Is Brian going?”

“He said that he wasn’t,” Justin told her. “He thinks it’s too hetero for him to be there showing his support to me.”

“He’s stupid,” Daphne protested.

Justin smiled and looked at himself in the mirror. “I look fucking hot.”

Daphne rolled her eyes and put the magazine down. “I’m going to go now. You be good and don’t get into trouble.”

Justin smiled at her and watched her go. He looked at his watch and then walked to the dresser where he picked up his cologne and put some on. He took his wallet and his keys. Then he was on his way. When he got there the place was full.

“Here is the artist,” Charleston said. “There are so many people that want to see you. Your paintings sold almost completely. You only have two left.”

Justin was happy to hear that.

“Make that one,” Brian said behind them.

Justin turned around and arched a brow as he looked at the brunet. He looked at the man from top to bottom and felt his cock twitching. “Which one did you buy?”

“Eternal,” Brian whispered as he stood very close to the blond.

Charleston looked at the man and knew he had to have money. It was the most expensive painting that Justin had in the show. But he didn’t understand it as much. It was only shadows of what looked like two people barely touching each other.

Brian in the other hand knew it was him and Justin feeling each other without having to touch. He had watched the blond painting it and he had asked about it. At first he had been freaked out but later on Justin had told him that he had given him inspiration to paint and that meant a lot to him.

“You should have asked me for it,” Justin said. “I would have given it to you.”

“I am going to get Nancy,” Charleston said to Justin. “She’s dying to meet you.”

“What are you doing here?” Justin asked.

Brian shrugged. “It’s a free country.”

Justin narrowed his eyes at the man. He could see how tricky it could be to deal with Brian day in and day out. “So, how’s Michael?” Justin asked.

Brian nodded. “He’s okay. Getting better by the second.”

“Good,” Justin looked around. “Follow me.”

Brian grinned as he followed the shorter man. They went into one of the offices and locked it.

“Whose office is this?” Brian asked.

“Who fucking cares?” Justin asked pulling the brunet towards him.

Brian kissed Justin and moaned as their hard cocks brushed against each other. He moaned as their tongues danced around one another. His hand grabbed Justin’s crotch and massaged it. He couldn’t believe they were hiding away just to kiss.

Justin pulled back to take some air into his lungs. “Fuck me.”

Brian searched for a condom quickly while Justin dropped his pants. The brunet pushed Justin back on the desk and then inside of him.

“Oh god,” Justin gripped Brian’s waist with his legs.

Brian started kissing the blond. He could spend hours just giving all his attention to Justin’s mouth. It drove him crazy; everything about the blond drove him nuts with desire.

Justin bit his lower lip to keep from screaming. “Mmm.”

Brian’s head moved so now his breath was hitting Justin’s neck. Justin was squirming in his arms as they fuck. Brian was hammering hard and fast inside the blond. Their fuck was quick and quiet but very pleasurable. They exploded at the same time.

Justin laughed as Brian pulled back. “We are like a couple of horny teenagers.”

Brian grinned as he zipped his pants. Justin moved away and started searching around the drawers in the desk until he found some tissue to clean up. When they were presentable again they went outside.

“Come on,” Brian said grabbing Justin’s hands and going to the bar. “Let me have two Jim Beams.”

Justin looked at his hand interlaced with Brian’s and felt somewhat weird doing it. He was starting to understand the man in front of him little by little.

“Here,” Brian told him.

“Where were you, Justin?” Charleston asked as he came to stand next to him.

Justin drank his shot in one move. “I’ll see you.”

Brian didn’t have anywhere to be at the moment. He would wait for Justin and tell himself that it was because they were going to finish what they had started at the office and not any other reason; like being there for the man he loved.

The same way that when it was all over and Justin wanted to go back to his apartment he smiled from ear to ear because Brian had waited for him. He would tell himself it was because he was horny and now they could fuck and not because it make his stomach do flip flops and his heartbeat go wild.

***

_But my head is wicked jealous  
I don’t want to talk about it right now_

When Justin arrived at Babylon he couldn’t find anybody. He asked for a drink and scanned the place. When he was done he was about to go dance when he spotted Brian dancing with someone. He smirked and went after the brunet.

“Having fun?” Justin asked smirking.

“Tons,” Brian assured him.

The trick that was dancing with Brian got closer to the man. He didn’t want the blond to interrupt them. Justin watched as Brian laughed about it and he didn’t like that one bit.

“Do you mind if I dance with you guys?” Justin asked looking at the trick. “You are really hot.”

The trick felt wanted while Brian frowned not sure what Justin was cooking in his head but he didn’t like the look in Justin’s eyes.

“No problem,” the trick said.

Justin started dancing with them. He started by giving all his attention to Brian’s trick. He touched, groped and kissed the man. When he managed to get in between the trick and Brian he knew he was getting his way.

Brian was focused on the pleasure he was receiving by Justin every time the blond rubbed his butt against his hard dick. He closed his eyes and held on to Justin’s hips to keep the blond in place.

The trick watched Brian and Justin got involved in each other. He knew he was invisible to them at that moment so he left feeling somewhat disappointed but not being able to do anything else.

Justin started licking Brian’s neck. His hands roamed the brunet’s body. “You are so fucking hot,” he told the brunet seductively with his head throw back against Brain.

Brian opened his eyes to find himself dancing with only Justin. He kissed Justin’s neck and he wasn’t sure which of them was doing the purring. Justin turned around grinning. Brian pulled the blond closer to him and kissed him hard. Justin moaned and then pulled back and away.

“Where are you going?” Brian asked in a husky voice.

“To find a trick for the night,” Justin told him and left. “I mean I don’t want to ruin your fun.”

“Twat,” Brian muttered and looked around to see if he could see the guy he had been dancing with. He could strangle the blond. When he saw the guy a few feet away from him he went after him.

“Your back,” the trick said.

“Come on,” Brian grabbed the man by the wrist and pulled him to the backroom.

They found a corner and the man started sucking Brian. A few seconds later Justin was there with some guy that looked familiar. Justin was somewhat annoyed seeing that Brian had found the guy once again. And not losing anytime he knew how to get Brian to leave the trick for him, yet once again.

“I want you to suck me,” Justin whispered.

Rich nodded and got on his knees. Justin watched the brunet as he got sucked. He threw his head back and imagined it was Brian.

“Get up,” Justin said as he dropped his pants lower.

Brian was watching every movement that Justin was making. He knew the show was for him and he smiled a bit and let his own trick suck him off enjoying it even more. Then it changed the minute that Justin turned his back on the man and leaned against the wall. He wasn’t having any of that. He pushed his trick away and walked towards Justin and the man.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Justin asked when Brian pulled him towards him.

“Get the fuck away from us,” Brian growled to Justin’s trick.

“Fuck off,” the teen told him.

“It’s okay Rich,” Justin smirked. “I’ll talk to you later.”

Brian was even more pissed. He knew he had seen the man somewhere. Justin looked up at Brian when the brunet pushed him hard against the wall.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked him.

“With what?” Justin asked.

Brian turned him around facing the wall. “You are having a particular itch, Justin?”

Justin smirked as he heard Brian. He knew the man must have been livid. He got the same way just thinking that Brian might let anyone else fuck him. It’s not like he could tell Brian what to do but that was his special place.

Brian opened the condom and put it on. He grabbed the lube and put some on. He grabbed Justin’s hips and he started to push inside the blond.

“Fuck!” Justin hissed feeling the pinch in asshole as Brian pushed all the way in.

“So tight,” Brian growled. “Your little ass is mine.”

“There is nothing little about it,” Justin hissed as he pushed back into Brian.

They fuck hard and fast against the wall. Brian was devouring Justin’s earlobe. Justin kept growling and asking for more. When they exploded there were a few cat calls and applause.

Justin smirked. “We are good together.”

Brian nodded as he did his pants. They got out of the backroom and went to the bar.

“Justin,” Richard said. “Hey.”

Justin smiled at the boy. “Want a beer?”

Brian frowned but stayed quiet as he drank his drink.

“Sure,” Richard told him smiling.

Justin bought it and gave it to the teen.

“How old are you kid?” Brian asked.

“Leave him alone, Bri,” Justin said and then chuckled.

“I’m eighteen,” Richard answered.

“Right and I am a eunuch,” Brian told him sarcastically.

“What is that?” Richard asked.

Justin bit his lower lip. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I say he’s sixteen,” Brian told Justin and then took a sip of his beer.

“Still legal,” Justin commented.

Richard kept quiet. The truth was that he was seventeen but he didn’t want Justin thinking he was only a baby. “So, Justin, why do you hang out with old people?”

Brian smirked. “At least he’s trying.”

Justin put a hand on Richard’s shoulder. “Brian is the stud of this throbbing mass you see. You could only hope to be half as good as he is one day.”

Richard frowned.

Brian came behind Justin and kissed him on the neck. “Let’s go. I have plans for you.”

Justin leaned close to Richard and kissed him on the mouth. “I’ll see ya.”

Richard looked at his beer and couldn’t do anything else while Justin and Brian left.

“I don’t like you hanging out with that kid,” Brian told him as they walked out of Babylon. “He’s a prick.”

“Do you want or need to have him be gone?” Justin asked.

“Don’t push me,” Brian warned.

Justin smirked slightly. He didn’t want Brian to see him. He had been so fucking jealous of Brian dancing with that guy that he decided that a little payback was in order. He never thought they were going to get jealous and it scared him shitless of what Brian could do to him.

“I have always said it. You are a resentful little shit,” Brian told him once they were inside his car.

“It wasn’t like that,” Justin told him.

“You were jealous,” Brian muttered starting the ‘vette.

“So were you!” Justin yelled.

There was total silence in the car.

“Let’s not talk about this,” Brian told him.

“Okay,” Justin agreed.

Soon they were home and in bed holding to each other. Both of them knew they had been jealous and that not talking about it didn’t change the fact that it was true.

***

_Still in love with all your sins  
Where you stop and I begin?_

“You guys couldn’t wait for us?” Justin asked taking off his coat and went to sit in the table.

“You are so late,” Debbie told them.

“We were doing something,” Brian told them.

“I bet,” Emmett winked at Justin.

“What?” Michael asked. “You now spend all your time together?”

“What’s wrong with that?” Lindsay asked. “They are together after all.”

“We are not,” Brian protested.

“Don’t you want a stable boyfriend?” Melanie asked looking at Justin. “Someone that loves you? You can’t be as heartless as Brian.”

“Brian doesn’t do boyfriends,” Michael informed all of them.

“Of course he does,” Justin said. “He did Kyle’s boyfriend last week and James and...” he turned to look at Brian. “What was that guy’s name, the one with the red hair and blue stripes?”

Brain shrugged.

“Jesus Christ,” Melanie protested as she heard Justin.

Debbie shook her head and stood up. “If he wasn’t blond and him brunet we wouldn’t be able to tell them apart.”

“No shit,” Ted said.

“Plus,” Justin said. “Brian is not my boyfriend. We are just friends.”

“Brian doesn’t fuck his friends,” Michael said.

“Oh really,” Justin said and looked at Emmett. “I didn’t know that.”

Emmett looked away.

“You and Brian fucked?” David asked getting the reason why Justin had looked at Emmett. He wanted to make Michael see that Brian wasn’t for him.

“What?” Michael asked in a high pitch voice.

“It’s not true,” Melanie said looking from Brian to Emmett. “No way!”

Brian looked and Justin and rolled his eyes. He had never told Justin but the blond had deduced it on his own. Now by the look of Michael’s face he knew things weren’t going to be okay.

“I...” Emmett didn’t know what to say.

“It was a long time ago,” Brian said.

Michael got up from the table and left to his old room. Justin rolled his eyes and leaned closer to Brian.

“You should fuck him, Brian,” Justin muttered.

“Fuck you,” Brian hissed and got up too to go after his friend.

“Wow,” Ted looked at Emmett. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

Brian was in front of the door to Michael’s room. He knocked and then went inside to find Michael crying. He rubbed the back of his neck not sure what he could say to the man.

“Why?” Michael asked. “Why would you fuck Emmett?”

“It’s no big deal,” Brian told him. “It was a long time ago. We barely knew each other. It wasn’t like he was my friend at the time.”

Michael gripped the pillow in his lap. He wanted to be the one to be with Brian, not Emmett and definitely not Justin.

“Mikey talk to me,” Brian told him.

“What do you want me to say?” Michael asked.

Brian moved closer to Michael. He sat down and swallowed hard. “It’s different with you and me,” Brian said. “I don’t want to screw that up.”

Michael bit his lower lip.

“Plus now you have Dave in your life,” Brian pointed out.

“And you have Justin,” Michael said bitterly.

“He’s not mine,” Brian told him quickly. “He’s just…around.”

“That’s bullshit, Brian,” Michael told him. “You want to be with him or you wouldn’t even bother.”

Brian frowned. He knew he had nothing to say to his friend. “I’m going to go.”

Michael stayed there.

“Hey,” David said when Brian came out of the room. “Can I go in?”

Brian shrugged and went down the stairs. He looked at Justin who was eating and laughing with Vic. He wanted to slap the blond for starting all that but he knew it wouldn’t be fair. It wasn’t Justin’s fault that Michael was obsessed with him.

“Where are you going?” Debbie asked the brunet.

“Outside,” Brian told her.

Everyone looked back at Justin. Justin arched his brows and shook his head.

“Okay,” Justin got up. “I’ll see if he is okay.”

“You started it,” Melanie said.

“Mel,” Lindsay muttered. “Leave it alone.”

Justin glared at her and went out to find Brian sitting on the steps of the house.

“What do you want?” Brian asked.

Justin knew the man was mad. He moved in front of Brian and kneeled in front of him his hands rested on Brian’s thighs. “Are you mad at me?”

Brian stayed quiet.

Justin leaned forth and kissed him on the chin. “I’ve been such a bad boy.”

Brian sighed as Justin grabbed his crotch.

“Maybe I need to be punished,” Justin said sexily close to Brian’s ear.

Brian pushed him back slightly and stared at the blond. He wanted to stay mad but he was getting horny. “Maybe your punishment is that you are not getting any.”

Justin pretended to be pouting and moved to sit next to Brian. “That’s okay. I’m going to the baths tonight. Do you want to come with me?”

“No,” Brian told him.

“You are still pissed,” Justin pointed out as he took his cigarette’s box out.

Brian sighed and didn’t say anything.

“I didn’t know he was going to react that way,” Justin told him as he lit his cigarette.

“Whatever,” Brian muttered.

“Stop brooding, Brian,” Justin told him. “It’s done and over with.”

“Jesus Christ,” Brian said. “I thought he was over me. He’s with David.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it,” Justin sighed. “He’s been trying to get your attention. That’s all.”

Brian looked at Justin with an arched brow. “What are you? The expert.”

Justin leaned closer and smiled. He kissed Brian on the lips. “You should know how good I am at things.”

“You are such an asshole,” Brian said turning his head.

Justin took a long drag and then puffed it at Brian’s face. “I think that you should either fuck him or make it really clear that it’s never going to happen. He can’t keep living in denial Brian.”

“You don’t get to decide that,” Brian told him.

Justin shrugged and passed his cigarette to Brian. “I’m going to go.”

Brian stayed quiet.

“Are you still angry?” Justin asked and decided to leave it at that when the brunet didn’t answer.

“Justin,” Brian grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him closer. “Be careful.”

Justin kissed him and left. Brian stayed sitting in the porch for a little while before he left. Michael’s words were in his head. He wondered if Justin considered them a couple. He pushed any thoughts of Justin away and decided to go home.

***

_You are angry when you are beautiful_  
Your love is such a tease  
I’m drowning in your dizzy noise  
I want to feel you scream 

Justin opened the door to his apartment and looked at Brian with a coffee in hand. “Did you bring me a hot chocolate?”

“No,” Brian told him. “I didn’t bring you anything.”

“What the fuck are you doing here so fucking early?” Justin asked as he rubbed his temples. “Close the fucking door.”

Brian grinned. “Someone is having a bad morning.”

“Fuck off, Brian,” Justin spat out as he walked back to his bedroom.

Brian took another sip of his coffee before he put it on top of the dresser. He took off his coat and threw it on top of the bed. He then got on the bed and crawled towards the blond. He kissed Justin’s neck and shook him slightly.

“Brian,” Justin complained. “Stop it. I want to sleep.”

“You can’t,” Brian told him. “You promised Lindsay you would help her set the room.”

“When the fuck did that happen?” Justin asked. “Was I high?”

“A few weeks ago,” Brian told him. “Come on, get up.”

Justin growled at Brian as he got up. “I hate you.”

Brian chuckled and stayed in bed until he heard the shower. He got up and started stripping as he walked to the bathroom.

“Don’t you have water at the loft?” Justin asked sarcastically as Brian stepped inside.

Brian pushed him against the wall hard.

Justin gasped at the sudden change. First, Brian had been cuddling him and now he was manhandling him. Brian licked Justin’s neck before he bit it hard.

“God,” Justin moaned. “Do you have a condom in your hands right now?”

“Right here,” Brian said showing it to the blond.

“Good,” Justin said.

“Who’s been a naughty boy?” Brian asked in a gruff voice.

“What are you Santa?” Justin asked grinning.

“Kinky,” Brian bit Justin’s shoulder this time.

“Fuck,” Justin hissed. “What’s with you?”

Brian pulled back and sat down on the shower with his back to the tiled wall. “Come here.”

Justin straddled the brunet.

“No,” Brian said. “Turn around.”

Justin gave his back to Brian. He heard the condom wrapper being opened and he got on his knees. Brian put the condom on and took hold of Justin’s hips. He made the blond sit on his cock in one swift move.

“Fuck,” Justin thrashed against Brian. He was trying to pull away but the brunet wasn’t letting him.

“What is it, Sunshine?” Brian asked. “Can’t take it?”

Justin took a few deep breaths. He gripped Brian’s cock hard inside of him and didn’t stop until he heard Brian moaning. Then he started to move up and down on Brian’s cock.

“Yes,” Brian closed his eyes and threw his head back. His hand gripped Justin’s waist hard.

“Harder,” Justin yelled after a few minutes. “Come on, can’t you do it?”

Brian smirked and pushed Justin off of him. He saw as Justin’s body slid to the floor face down and the blond groaned. Brian quickly got on his knees and in seconds was inside the blond. The water was hitting Justin’s head and back.

“Fuck!” Justin yelled and tried to hold still as Brian hammered inside of him. It was a complete failure since the only leverage he had was the floor and it was wet and slippery.

Brian bit Justin’s shoulder once again then pushed the blond’s whole body down. He wanted to have control of everything. Justin was going wild with the friction his cock was receiving.

“Fuck!” Justin hissed as his movement became restricted. He really didn’t care as long as Brian kept fucking him hard and fast.

Brian buried his nails on the blond’s skin and shot his cum. He felt Justin’s body trembling under him. He pulled back and got on his haunches. Justin turned around slowly. He felt his hole was on fire. He looked at Brian and who was taking off the condom.

“That was some way to wake someone up,” Justin said as he got up and grabbed the soap.

“Yeah,” Brian said taking the shampoo to wash Justin’s hair.

“Full service,” Justin commented as Brian’s long fingers dug into his scalp.

“Don’t get used to it,” Brian whispered and then licked Justin’s ear.

Justin laughed and nodded slightly. When they finished washing each other they moved to drying each other. Justin walked around his room naked for a few seconds.

“Are you looking for what to wear?” Brian asked as he was almost dressed completely.

Justin scoffed. “I don’t need to look for anything. I look hot in anything I throw on.”

Brian licked his lips.

“Was this some kind of payback?” Justin asked and laughed when he got on the bed.

“What are you talking about?” Brian asked him as his hand automatically went to caress Justin’s body.

“You were mad about me bringing up that thing with Em,” Justin pointed out.

Brian snorted and got on his side. He looked at Justin and shook his head. “Why do you ask?”

“You broke me,” Justin complained. “You are such a fucking animal.”

“When the fuck did you became so sensitive?” Brian asked reaching for a smoke, the box being behind Justin.

“How about now?” Justin asked and turned on his stomach. He smirked and signaled Brian to hand him a cigarette.

“Poor baby,” Brian told him giving the cigarette to Justin. Instead of lighting another one he got behind Justin.

“What are you doing?” Justin asked.

Brian parted his cheeks and could see that Justin’s hole was a bit puffy. He moved in ready to make it better. He licked around the edges and got hard as he heard Justin moaning.

“Oh fuck,” Justin grabbed the sheets with his free hand. “Here!”

Brian took the cigarette and crushed it in the ashtray. The he went back to soothing Justin’s hole. “Is that better?” Brian asked.

“Don’t stop,” Justin growled at him.

Brian went back to eating Justin out. His tongue was lapping around the blond’s hole enthusiastically. He would suck on it and then blow hot air making Justin squirm. Then after a while his tongue pushed inside the swollen bud. He could feel Justin trying to pull him inside.

“Fuck me!” Justin yelled.

Brian could feel Justin’s shaky body all around his tongue. He pulled back and smirked. “I thought you would never ask,” he muttered as he reached for the lube.

Justin smiled as he felt Brian’s cock once again inside of him. He was starting to love it when his beautiful man got angry, it was profitable for him. He was so going to be late to go and help Lindsay but he really didn’t care about that.

***

_I can’t control you_  
You can’t control me  
I need to feel you 

“It looks great,” Lindsay said looking at the decoration she had bought a few days ago. She was happy that Justin had helped her putting them up.

Justin nodded and shrugged. He didn’t care one way or another.

“Everyone should be here in a few minutes,” Melanie said as she looked at her watch.

Justin looked at Brian who was pacing back and forth with Gus. The boy was trying really hard to stay awake. He smiled at the man and his kid.

Lindsay looked at Melanie with a brilliant smile. She nodded towards the boys and the brunette rolled her eyes. Melanie still thought Lindsay was crazy thinking that Brian and Justin were in love; to her they were nothing but two total insensitive assholes.

“I’m going to put him in his bed,” Brian said as he went up the stairs.

“Linds is there anything else you want?” Justin asked her. They had been rearranging the dinning room and living room all day. He was happy when Lindsay finally did say she was satisfied with it and for what, nothing but a dinner with the family.

“Dinner is almost ready,” Lindsay informed him.

“Great,” Justin told her.

“You are not hungry, are you?” Lindsay asked looking at him like he was from another planet.

“I’m starving,” Justin informed her.

“You just ate,” Melanie pointed out.

“He has no limit,” Brian said smirking as he came down the stairs. Then he hurried to the door when there was a knock.

“Brian,” Michael said surprised. “What are you doing here so early?”

“I was with Gus,” Brian told them as he let his best friend and David in the house.

“We brought some wine,” David said when Melanie stood in front of them helping them with their coats.

“You didn’t have to,” Melanie kissed him on the cheek. “But it’s great nonetheless.”

Debbie was right behind them. “Vic couldn’t come because he has a date,” she informed them.

The guys walked to the living room while Debbie went to see what Lindsay had cooked.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Melanie asked trying to be a great hostess.

“A beer would be fine for now,” David said.

“Me too,” Brian agreed.

“I don’t want anything,” Michael assured her.

Justin got up when he heard the bell. He went to the door and smiled at Emmett. “Hey sweet thing,” he pulled Emmett by the arm and kissed him on the cheek.

“Don’t I even get a hello?” Ted asked.

“Close the door,” Justin told him and pulled Emmett to the living room.

“You guys are already here,” Emmett said as he sat down next to Brian. “Hey.”

Brian smiled and threw his arm around Emmett, then kissed him on the cheek. “How is it going?”

“Good,” Emmett answered a bit nervous.

Michael huffed and looked away from them.

“Here you go,” Melanie said coming with a beer for David. “Do you want one Ted?”

Ted nodded slowly.

“How about you Emmett?” she asked.

“A bottle of water would be nice, if you have one,” Emmett told her.

“You are not going to drink?” Justin asked getting up. “How are you going to deal with this ordeal?”

Emmett grinned. “I’ll drink at Babylon and cope then.”

“Dinner with the girls is not so bad,” Ted told them.

Justin shrugged and walked to the kitchen. Brian had told him that the girls were total freaks when it came to hosting a family dinner. Everything had to be perfect and run smoothly from the time the day of the dinner started until it ended.

“What are you doing here?” Lindsay asked taking the pot from the counter and moving it back onto the stove to heat up the soup.

“Uh,” Justin grabbed the beer away from Melanie. “Thanks Mel, how swell of you.”

Melanie glared at him and went back to the fridge to get a beer for Ted.

Justin went back to the living room and twisted the cap off throwing on the floor and smirking about it. He took a sip and then handed it to Brian.

“Thanks,” Brian told him.

“What are you his wife?” Michael asked angry.

Justin sat down where he was very slowly. “You must be his guard dog then.”

Everyone knew what was coming. Melanie came back and handed everyone what they asked for. She glared at Brian when he grinned at her. She saw that they were really quiet but decide to go back to the kitchen. She would know what was going on later when she asked Ted.

“So, where’s Gus?” Emmett asked.

“He’s sleeping,” Justin said. “He had a tiresome day.”

“How would you know?” Michael asked.

“Drop it, Mikey,” Brian told him.

“What?” Michael asked trying to look innocent.

“I was here with him,” Justin said smirking. “Brian and Gus and I had a great time.”

“What?” Michael asked.

David frowned and stared at his bottle.

“Easy, Mikey,” Justin told him. “I don’t want you having a heart attack?”

“Well, I see how it is,” Michael told them. “Ever since you got back together you are afraid to leave him alone for a second?”

“We are not together,” Brian spat out.

Justin glared at Michael. He couldn’t stand the man sometimes and at that precise moment he could kill him. He was sure that Michael was the one always putting ideas in Brian’s head.

“You are still jealous about me, Mikey?” Justin asked raising a brow.

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed.

“Michael,” Emmett said trying to intervene.

“Careful Emmett,” Justin said. “You are one of the few that got what he dreams about. He might bite your head off.”

“Shut the fuck up!” Michael hissed.

“What is going on?” Debbie asked as she rushed to the living room.

“Nothing,” Ted told her.

Debbie frowned as she looked around. She sighed and went back to the kitchen. She sometimes felt like she was dealing with teenagers.

Justin opened his mouth to say something but Brian intervened.

“Don’t,” Brian told him.

“What?” Justin asked. “You don’t know what I was going to say.”

“Stop bothering Mikey,” Brian said pinching the bridge of his nose.

Michael smirked at Justin.

Justin sighed. “I know. I know how sensitive little Mikey can be.”

“Stop it,” David intervened. “I won’t allow you to...”

“Shut the fuck up,” Justin said getting up. “I really could care less what you have to say.”

They were quiet as Justin exited the living room.

“Why the fuck did you bring him here?” Michael asked.

“He’s a rude little shit, isn’t he?” David asked mad.

“It’s not like he started it,” Emmett pointed out.

“Are you defending him?” Michael asked.

Emmett took a sip of his water and stayed silent.

“Jeez, Brian this is your fault,” Michael informed as he crossed his arms. “I didn’t want that little fucker here.”

“Lindsay invited him,” Brian said getting up. “Justin can be wherever the fuck he wants,” after he said that he went in the same direction that Justin had left.

“What do you want?” Justin asked when he heard the backdoor open.

“We need to talk,” Brian told him.

“About what?” Justin asked staring up at the dark sky.

“You were acting like a total asshole in there,” Brian told him. “When we get back inside I don’t want you saying anything to Michael.”

Justin threw his cigarette away and moved closer to Brian. “Michael was an asshole too and do not fucking tell me what to do!” he spat out each word before he moved back inside the house.

“Justin,” Lindsay said smiling. “Dinner is about ready.”

“Okay,” Justin told her.

“Well, Lindsay,” Debbie told her. “The place looks very beautiful.”

“Justin helped me,” Lindsay said happily.

“He’s such a sweetie,” Debbie said caressing Justin’s face.

Justin gave her a small smile before he moved away. He looked towards the living room and sighed. He went to the stairs and sat down. Emmett was coming his way and smiled.

“Are you okay?” Emmett asked.

Justin nodded slowly.

Once Brian came back to the house he stood in front of Emmett and Justin. He arched a brow at the blond but they didn’t talk.

“Is there something going on?” Emmett asked looking from Justin to Brian.

They heard a faint cry and Justin quickly got up. “I am going to go see what Gus is doing,” Justin said and turned around.

“He’s my son,” Brian protested as he followed Justin. “I can check on him.”

When they got to the bedroom Gus was stirring. Justin quickly put his hand on the boy’s back and shook him gently. Gus made a happy sound and fell back asleep.

“You’re good at that,” Brian pointed out.

Justin stayed quiet. When he was sure that Gus was asleep he left and Brian followed him.

“Wait,” Brian said grabbing him by the arm and going into Lindsay and Melanie’s room. “I really didn’t want to make you mad.”

“You want to make me happy?” Justin asked grinning.

Brian arched a brow. Justin pulled him close and started kissing the brunet. He slowly undid the buttons in Brian’s shirt and then threw it to the floor. Then he got rid of the brunet’s wife beater and then he opened the man’s jeans and pushed them down.

“We have to be quiet,” Brian muttered.

Justin opened his pants and took his hard penis out. He reached for a condom and put it on.

“Uh hu,” Brian said shaking his head. “I don’t think so, Sunshine.”

Justin pushed Brian back in the bed and turned him face down. His fingers found Brian’s hole and pushed inside. Brian closed his eyes and grunted. He tried to move but Justin had him pinned.

“I’m going to fuck your tight hole hard,” Justin informed him in a husky voice.

Brian grunted as Justin pushed inside of him. He arched his body and grinded his teeth when the pain hit him. He felt Justin’s hips moving slowly in circles trying to take his pain away. After a few seconds they were moving slowly.

“You like it when I take you like this,” Justin told him.

Brian bit his lower lip. He wasn’t going to say a thing.

“I know you do,” Justin told him as he licked Brian’s neck. His hips started to move faster.

Brian groaned and pushed back into Justin.

“Oh god!” Justin groaned and held on to Brian’s hips as he fucked the taller man. “Yes.”

“Ah,” Brian gasped out when Justin rubbed his prostate.

Justin hammered inside Brian without mercy. He was letting go of all his anger as he fucked the brunet. His fingers interlaced in the man’s hair and he pulled back hard. Brian groaned and gasped when Justin bit him, not too hard though. Brian grabbed his cock and started jerking off.

Justin let out Brian’s name escape his lips as the brunet clamped down on him and they both came. They stopped moving but still were panting. Justin pulled out of his lover slowly and took off the condom.

“Where the fuck should I throw this?” Justin asked as he tied the condom.

Brian snorted as he got up. He reached for his wife beater to clean his stomach and chest. He looked at the blond who was walking away from him. He grabbed his shirt and put it on. Then he lifted his pants and followed Justin out of the bedroom.

Justin was in the bathroom flushing the condom. Brian threw his wife beater in the trash. They look at each other and didn’t say anything.

“You do know that he’s an asshole,” Justin told him.

“Let’s not start,” Brian said. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“Of course not,” Justin said dryly making sure he looked presentable before going back downstairs. He looked at Brian and shook his head. He was tired of fighting over Michael.

Brian sighed and rubbed his face. Then he followed the blond.

“Where were you guys?” Lindsay asked as she put a bottle of wine on the table.

Everyone else was already sitting down. There was only a chair left next to Michael and another across that chair. Brian and Justin went and sat down.

“Gus was crying,” Justin told her. “We were checking up on him.”

“How sweet,” Emmett said smiling.

Brian stayed quiet as he sat down trying to hide his smile. He knew Melanie would fucking die is she knew they had fucked in her bed.

“Brian babe,” Justin said sardonically. “Pass me the salad.”

“Grab it yourself,” Brian hissed, because even though Justin had fucked him into oblivion he was still pissed at the blond.

Justin got up grabbed the salad and served himself. He looked at Brian and then at Melanie briefly. Justin looked back and Brian and winked at him. The two of them laughed and resumed eating dinner.

The rest of the family was totally lost. They couldn’t keep up with the guys’ behavior but didn’t want to get in the middle of it. Justin and Brian understood each other in their own very strange and twisted world.

Justin looked at Brian once again and smiled. Justin knew he could never tell Brian what to do and he expected the same from the brunet. Brian knew Justin was old enough and didn’t need someone telling him what to do. The brunet knew he would have gotten as pissed at the blond had if someone tried to tell how to behave.

By the time dinner was over Brian grinned at the blond. Justin arched a brow and smiled slowly. All was forgotten.


	10. In The Depths Of Despair

_Oh, but every time I’m close to you_  
There is too much I can’t say  
And you just walked away 

Brian yawned as he poured himself some coffee. He added a bit of sugar and then started walking towards the room. He had a slight headache and hoped it would go away pretty soon.

“Hey,” Justin said as he looked at Brian. His arms wrapped around a pillow.

“Morning,” Brian said as he came into the bedroom with his cup in hand.

“Morning,” Justin repeated. He was sitting at the edge of the bed just staring at the floor.

Brian licked his lips as he stared at the blond. He smiled briefly just seeing how beautiful the blond was. “What’s with you?” Brian asked.

“What?” Justin asked truly lost. He rubbed his face and shook his head.

Brian continued staring at him. He wanted to tell him that he loved him but he shook his head. It couldn’t be true, he didn’t do love. He took a few sips of coffee before he got back in bed. “You’re not still mad about Mikey?”

“Of course not,” Justin assured him.

“What is it then?” Brian asked brushing Justin’s hair back.

Justin shook his head. “Not a thing.”

“Mmm,” Brian grunted with a frown. He let a finger trace Justin’s neck.

“Is there something on your mind, Mr. Kinney?” Justin asked closing his eyes.

“As a matter fact there is,” Brian told him with a wicked smile. He pulled Justin back into the bed and started by kissing Justin on the neck.

Justin smiled as Brian kissed him on the chest and then continued his downward progress. He played with the brunet’s hair as Brian played with him.

“Silky,” Brian muttered and then circled Justin’s navel with his tongue.

“Mmm, that feels so good,” Justin encouraged him.

Brian let his tongue keep going down the smooth skin. He buried his face on Justin’s pubic hair. He felt Justin’s cock harden against his cheek and he pulled back a bit to watch the smaller man’s hardening cock. He moved so that now he was straddling Justin’s legs. He bent down and licked the head of Justin’s cock.

“Fuck yeah,” Justin hissed as he got on his elbows to watch the brunet.

Brian messaged Justin’s balls as he started licking the stirring cock. He first took Justin’s cock head into his mouth and moaned. Justin closed his eyes briefly as the moans traveled his body. He swallowed and licked his lips wanting Brian to take him completely in his mouth.

The smell of sex hit Brian’s nostrils and invaded his soul. He loved it. He let Justin’s cock slip further into his mouth and felt his own cock throbbing. His head started bobbing up and down and it was times like that were he could run to the rooftop and yell how much he loved cock; Justin’s cock.

Justin bent his legs and started to push his hips up trying to fuck Brian’s mouth. He closed his eyes but this time they didn’t open again. He could feel the tip of his cock rubbing at the back of Brian’s mouth and then it all stopped. His cock was still inside Brian’s mouth and when he opened his eyes Brian was staring at him.

“Bri,” Justin chocked out.

Brian started swallowing making Justin hiss and arch from the bed.

“Ah,” Justin yelled. “Brian.”

Brian stuck a finger inside of Justin’s ass and twisted it around. Justin could see stars behind his eyes and then it all went black as he spilled his cum inside Brian’s mouth. Justin was trying to get his breathing back to normal but Brian had other plans.

“Brain,” Justin gasped in surprise as Brian turned him around. Then he felt something wet hit his wrinkled bud.

Brian was spitting Justin’s cum on the blond’s hole. Then with his fingers he used it as lube to open Justin up.

“Oh god,” Justin moaned.

Brian reached for a condom and ripped it open. He was hard as a rock and needed to fuck the blond right away. He positioned himself at Justin’s entrance and started to push in.

“It hurts,” Justin told him in a kid’s voice.

Brian licked Justin’s lips. Then watched them glisten and he liked it. “Does it now?”

“Yes,” Justin sniffed. “You’re hurting me sir.”

“Oh yes,” Brian pulled back and pushed hard inside.

Justin gripped Brian’s shoulder and gasped. “Do you want to hurt me, sir?”

“Yes,” Brian hissed in his ear. He smiled when he felt Justin getting hard again. “You have such a tight hole.”

Justin bit his lower lip and Brian grabbed his arms and pushed them up; holding Justin in place. “Tell me how much you like it.”

“I like it,” Justin said his voice was one of an innocent kid. He knew it turned Brian on when they played games.

“Tell me,” Brian growled his eyes were filled with lust.

“Sir,” Justin moaned.

“Tell me baby boy,” Brian ordered.

“It’s so big and it’s splitting me,” Justin chocked out. “But I like it.”

Brian smirked and sucked on Justin’s earlobe. “You’re such a dirty boy,” Brian whispered above Justin’s ear.

“I am,” Justin told him as he arched from the bed receiving Brian.

Brian closed his eyes and came deep inside the body under him. He could feel Justin’s wet and sticky cum in between them. And for some reason he was in no hurry in moving away.

“Fuck,” Justin said. “Don’t move. My cock is super sensitive right now.”

Brian laughed.

“Brian!” Justin protested.

Brian pulled back and slowly out of Justin. He took off the condom as he stared at the blond. “You enjoy it?”

“Too much,” Justin told him laughing.

“So, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Brian asked throwing the condom away.

Justin sighed. He didn’t want to be reminded of his problems. “Nothing, fuck.”

“Justin,” Brian drawled.

“I need a shower,” Justin said getting up from the bed.

“You know you can tell me,” Brian told him.

Justin shrugged and got up to go to the bathroom. “I have to get a shower and go home.”

“Right,” Brian said letting out a deep breath.

Justin stopped and looked at Brian. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Brian asked.

“Yeah,” Justin assured him. “Look it’s really nothing at all. Don’t worry about it.”

Brian nodded slowly. He didn’t want to force Justin into telling him anything; after all it wasn’t his business. He thought about the things he wanted to say himself and shook his head. Justin would think he was a total idiot and he would probably be right. He just couldn’t love Justin because Brian Kinney didn’t do love.

***

_Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby?  
Right now I feel invisible to you, like I’m not real_

Justin put his glass down and asked for another shot of tequila. He wanted to forget the world existed and the best way to achieve that goal was by getting drunk.

Michael frowned as he looked at Justin. “Hey,” he put his empty bottle next to Justin’s glasses. “Are you okay?”

Justin looked at Michael. “Is the world ending? Why the fuck do you care?”

“I don’t,” Michael told him.

“Then get the fuck away from me,” Justin spat out. “Jeez.”

“What’s going on boys?” Brian asked as he put his arm around Michael. “Mikey do you remember Damon?”

Michael looked at the man and nodded slightly. “Yeah.”

“Hey, Michael,” Damon said. “It’s nice to see you again.”

“Justin, this is the friend that I talked to you about,” Brian said.

“Whatever,” Justin said not bothering to turn back.

Brian frowned and didn’t bother with the blond.

“What’s with him?” Damon asked.

“How the fuck should I know?” Brian asked.

“Hello baby,” Emmett said kissing Justin on the cheek.

“Who is this?” Ted asked.

“He’s a buddy from college,” Brian said to Ted. “Damon, these are Ted and Emmett.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Damon said extending his hand to Emmett.

Emmett shook it and then Ted.

Justin turned around in his seat. “Who has fucking E?”

“It’s early,” Michael said. “I’m not going to be driving anyone home this time.”

“He’s a big boy, Mikey,” Brian said taking out some E. He took out a pill intending to hand it to Justin.

Justin opened his mouth and stuck his tongue out. Brian smirked and put it inside. His long index finger was sucked in by the blond’s mouth.

“Hot,” Damon muttered to himself.

“Let’s go to Babylon,” Michael said suddenly.

“Why the fuck are you here bothering me already?” Justin asked as he pushed Brian to the side. “Your voice gives me a headache Mikey.”

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed. “I’m talking to Brian.”

“Ladies,” Brian said. “Today I’m hanging out with Damon.”

“Can I talk to you?” Justin asked giving Brian a pout even though he didn’t know he was doing it.

“Brian,” Damon said. “Why do you always get the clingy friends?”

“He’s not clingy,” Brian said and then looked at Justin. “What the fuck is your problem?”

“For fuck sakes,” Justin hissed. “Fuck this shit, never mind. Call me when we can talk without you making such a big fucking deal about it.”

“What’s with him?” Emmett asked. “Jesus, I have never seen him like that.”

“Jealousy is a bad thing,” Ted pointed out.

“Why would he be jealous?” Damon asked.

Everyone was quiet.

“He’s Brian’s boyfriend,” Michael said after a few seconds.

“What?” Damon asked surprised.

“He’s not,” Brian assured him. “We just...”

“Fuck,” Ted, and Emmett said at the same time.

“Okay,” Damon laughed and looked at Brian. “Wow. What happened to you, Brian? I thought you said you would never be caught alive with a partner much less a boyfriend?”

Brian got up and shook his head. “It’s not like that. Let’s have a few drinks before we go to Babylon.”

Michael smiled as he saw Justin leaving Woody’s. An hour later when they had drunk and talked enough they decided to leave the bar. They walked to Babylon in no hurry at all.

When they got there they asked for a round of drinks on Brian. Then they dance a bit. Brian pretended like he wasn’t looking for Justin. When he finally saw him he breathed easier knowing Justin was okay. He looked at the blond but the blond stared daggers at him.

“Do you mind if I leave you for a while?” Damon asked smirking.

Brian chuckled and shook his head. He took the opportunity to go after Justin.

“What the fuck do you want?” Justin asked as he looked at his empty glass.

“What was it?” Brain asked. “What did you want to tell me?”

“Oh, so it’s now convenient for you to listen to me?” Justin asked angry.

“Look,” Brian said.

“Don’t bother Brian,” Justin told him getting up. “Go play with your friend.”

Brian stayed where he was as he watched the blond walk away.

“So, what’s wrong with him?” Emmett asked coming towards Brian in a hurry. “He looks so…stressed.”

“Yeah,” Brian muttered and turned to the bartender. “A beer.”

“Please, Brian, tell me,” Emmett really wanted to know what was going on with Justin.

“Mind your own fucking business,” Brian hissed at him.

Emmett sighed. “Brian, he’s my friend. I really want to help him.”

“There is nothing wrong with him,” Brian pointed out.

“That’s bullshit and you know it,” Emmett argued. “You can see that something is going on. So don’t fucking lie to me.”

Brian sighed and grabbed his beer. He left Emmett at the bar while he went after Justin. The blond was talking to a trick and the man was nodding.

“Justin,” Brian said.

“Not now,” Justin told him.

“I really want to talk to you,” Brian told him. Now that he was standing so close to the blond he could see Justin was about to explode at any second. His eyes, his tone of voice, his body language were all screaming it loud and clear for help.

“Well,” Justin told him as he shrugged. “It’s not convenient for me right now. Why don’t you go sit down and hold on tight for me to return.”

The trick laughed.

Brian nodded slowly. “Forget you, Justin,” he turned around and left.

“What happened?” Damon asked when Brian returned to the bar. He had gotten sucked in the backroom and when he came back Brian was talking with Justin.

“Nothing,” Brian told him.

“Brian,” Emmett whined. “I have a really bad feeling.”

“Fucking leave it alone, Em,” Brian screamed. “Get fucking lost. I don’t want to fucking hear it.”

Emmett glared at Brian. “Fuck you, Brian Kinney. You’re a total asshole!” he turned around and left.

“I thought he was your boyfriend,” Damon said as he nodded towards Justin.

“What?” Brian asked.

Damon pointed at Justin who was leaving with a trick. Brian looked at the blond and ignored everything he was feeling.

“So,” Damon drawled as he looked at Justin with a guy. “What does that mean?” he asked as he looked at Brian.

“Nothing,” Brian said and for a moment he felt like he didn’t exist for the blond. “I told you. It’s just fucking.”

***

_And you know I need you now  
This isn’t easy to admit_

Justin knocked on the door and waited. When Brian didn’t come fast enough he used the key he had for the apartment.

“Whoa,” Damon said midway to the door, surprised to see it open.

“What?” Justin asked as he closed the door once he was inside the loft.

“He gave you a key to the loft?” Damon asked in disbelief.

“No,” Brian said coming out of his bedroom already dressed for work.

“I stole it,” Justin said not caring what Damon would think. He was tired of explaining himself to everyone.

Damon frowned not believing it. “That’s not right. Did you know that?” he asked turning to look at Brian.

“Yes,” Brian said not caring what Damon would think.

“Okay,” Damon didn’t have a fucking clue as to what was going on.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Brian asked.

“I came to talk to you, Brian,” Justin told him.

Brian walked back to the bedroom and Justin followed him.

“What’s the big deal?” Brian asked as he put his watch on. “Now you’re ready to talk to me? Well, it might not be…what was it…oh yeah, convenient for me right now.”

“I really needed to talk to you last night and you acted like a fucking asshole,” Justin hissed. “So I got mad. I shouldn’t have treated you like that.”

Damon looked at Brian from the kitchen with furrowed brows.

Brian turned to look at the blond. “I was busy you have to understand. You could have waited.”

“Fuck that, Brian,” Justin hissed.

Brian sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Look, don’t start.”

“Don’t start?” Justin repeated in a mocking voice.

“Don’t do this,” Brian warned. “Don’t screw it up.”

“I’m not screwing anything up!” Justin yelled. “I just...shit! I jus needed to be next to you, Brian. I...needed you.”

Brian moved away. He looked at Damon who was smirking now. He sighed and shook his head. “I need to go to work.”

Justin sighed. “I just...”

“I have work,” Brian said more forcefully. The truth was that he was scared shitless of what Damon would say. He had said to him so many things last night including that he didn’t care, he didn’t do love and all that shit. He didn’t want to go back on his word and start acting like Justin’s caring boyfriend now.

“I have something to tell you,” Justin said. “I know I’m acting out of character. I know that.”

“Later,” Brian walked over to him and kissed him on the forehead.

“Okay,” Justin whispered.

Brian walked out of the bedroom and grabbed his coat and his briefcase. He said goodbye to Damon and left the loft.

Justin stayed in the bedroom and Damon went to talk to him.

“What do you want?” Justin asked rubbing his temples.

“I only want to know,” Damon told him. “Are you two a couple?”

Justin walked over to him. “Let me answer you that question,” he said as he pulled Damon into him and kissed him hard.

Damon kissed him back and grabbed Justin’s butt.

“I don’t think so,” Justin said pushing Damon out of the bedroom.

“The bed is that way,” Damon told him.

“That’s Brian’s bed,” Justin said. “And I’m not fucking you in it.”

Damon shrugged not caring where Justin fucked him. Justin pushed Damon on the sofa and then started to undress. Damon smirked and did the same.

“Turn around,” Justin said.

Damon kneeled on the sofa. His chest rested against the sofa. Justin was behind Damon in a flash. He put a condom on and prepared the man in front of him.

“Oh god,” Damon was moaning as Justin’s opened him up.

Justin gripped the man’s hips and pushed in.

“Fuck,” Damon gasped as Justin entered him fast.

Justin grunted, closed his eyes and stared to move his hips.

Damon was moaning as Justin fucked him. He was gripping the sofa for dear life. He was so close to coming. He grabbed his cock and started jerking off. Justin felt when the man shot his load. He kept on moving a bit longer until he reached his climax.

“Jesus,” Damon said when Justin pulled out. His body was shaking as he turned around and sat on the sofa. “That was incredible.”

Justin didn’t say anything. He grabbed his jeans and started to get dressed.

“You’re a top,” Damon stated and started laughing. “I can see why Brian has it so bad for you.”

“What?” Justin asked.

“He was telling me last night how you mean nothing to him and all that bullshit,” Damon said. “But I know him. He was lying through his teeth.”

Justin grinned and zipped up his pants.

“Do you love him too?” Damon asked.

Justin kept quiet.

“Fuck,” Damon chuckled. “You two are a lot alike.”

“Clean that up,” Justin said referring to the sofa.

“I will,” Damon assured him. “So do you think we could have a repeat of this?”

“I don’t think so,” Justin said. “I have to go.”

Damon nodded slowly. He wished that Brian wasn’t so in love with the guy or he would be going after him. He sighed and went to get something to clean the sofa.

Justin left out of the loft and walked to his car. He had forgotten about his problem for a few minutes but then it all hit him again. He was feeling very lonely. He felt like he was drowning and he needed Brian. With Brian things seemed less terrifying. He just wanted the man to tell him that everything would be okay and he would believe it.

***

_It’s getting cold  
It’s time to die_

Brian and Damon entered Babylon with Michael. Brian made a bee-line for the bar.

“What’s with him?” Michael asked.

“I don’t know,” Damon said and they followed Brian.

“What’s going on with Justin?” Emmett asked.

Brian put his beer down and frowned. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“He’s been here drinking and going to the backroom,” Emmett said. “That’s all he does plus I think that he’s doing drugs as well. A lot of them Brain!”

“Here he comes,” Ted said quickly.

“Tequila,” Justin muttered to the bartender.

Brian looked at him and walked closer to his blond. He threw his arm around Justin shoulders and stared at the blond’s face. Justin felt the walls closing in on him.

“What’s wrong, Sunshine?” Brian asked him.

“I’m great,” Justin told him barely holding his façade together. “Can’t you see?”

“Don’t start,” Brian warned him.

“I’m not some weak little faggot, Brian,” Justin told him. “I’m perfectly okay.”

Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. He knew that the blond was okay now that he was drinking and obviously high. He would have to wait until Justin was sober again to tell him what was wrong with him. Justin reached for the E’s he had in his jeans’ pockets.

“Justin,” Damon said. “Do you want to dance?”

“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked.

“I think he liked my cock,” Justin said and grinned. He offered the drug to Damon but the man shook his head. He shrugged and took it himself. “Come on. I’ll let you rub your ass around it.”

“Jesus fuck,” Emmett said.

“I never thought I would see the day when there would be a bigger asshole than you,” Ted said to Brian.

Brian was pissed as hell. Justin had fucked his friend. He was going to start strangling a few people. He walked away from them and towards the backroom.

“Brian,” Michael whined and went after Brian.

“Jesus Christ,” Ted said shaking his head.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with Justin,” Emmett said. “He’s fucking everything up.”

“What are you talking about?” Ted asked him.

“Oh come on,” Emmett said. “You can see that Brian loves him. And that itself is a miracle.”

“Brain Kinney doesn’t love anyone,” Ted pointed out.

“He loves Justin,” Emmett sighed. He could see how awful it could get when Brian was falling in love with a man that was more fucked up than him. “Justin needs help. We should do an intervention. He’s doing too many drugs.”

“This is not our problem,” Ted told him.

“He’s our friend,” Emmett argued.

“No.” Ted shook his head and said, “He’s your friend. Not mine.”

“That’s really nice, Ted,” Emmett told him disappointed before he moved away.

“This is all his fucking fault,” Michael said as he came back and stood next to Ted.

“What is it?” Ted asked.

“Brian is acting like a total asshole because of Justin,” Michael hissed.

Ted rolled his eyes. Michael’s ravings were all about Justin, yet again.

“I hate that asshole,” Michael muttered.

Ted stayed at the bar with Michael listening his friend complain about the blond over and over again. He was glad when Damon and Justin stopped dancing and walked their way.

“Let me buy you something,” Damon said when he and Justin were back at the bar.

“Thank you,” Justin said when Damon gave him a beer.

“I’ll go see what I can find for the night boys,” Damon told them and left.

“Don’t stand to close to me, Ted,” Justin said smirking. “You’ll drive away the tricks.”

“Fuck you,” Ted told him.

“He’s an idiot,” Michael said. “Come on. Let’s go dance.”

Justin took a deep breath. He wanted everything to disappear around him. He wanted to be left alone but he knew that if he was alone it would all come back to haunt him.

“What are you doing here all alone?” Brian asked standing behind Justin before he moved next to the blond.

Justin looked at him and shrugged. “Want to get out of here?”

“I thought you had more important things to do,” Brian said. “Like fucking Damon.”

“You know it meant nothing to me,” Justin whispered.

“Hey,” a guy standing next to Brian said.

Brian pulled him close. “Excuse me, I have a trick to fuck, Justin,” he told the blond. He leaned closer to Justin and whispered, “don’t worry you know it means nothing to me.”

Justin felt his heart explode. He was angry and sad and he couldn’t take it anymore. His head was about to explode. He knew his life was a mess. He didn’t want to think about anything. He wanted to kick Brian’s ass for being such an asshole sometimes. He wanted to stop thinking about his son. It was the anniversary of his son’s death. And when he thought about it, he was the one that wanted to disappear. He had nothing else to hold on to.

“Two beers,” Michael said.

Justin opened his eyes and stared at the man. He realized that he had been standing there for a while now.

“Who’s that?” Michael asked.

“What?” Justin asked but too late realized that he was holding a picture of Alfred. “Fuck,” he said and quickly put it away.

“Hey,” Michael complained. “Who was that?”

“No one,” Justin hissed. “Mind your own fucking business, Michael. Please,” he muttered.

“What?” Michael asked. He wasn’t sure he had heard the blond right. Justin never said please to him.

“Nothing,” Justin said. “Shit!”

“Who was that?” Michael asked yet again.

“It’s none of your business,” Justin told him.

Michael narrowed his eyes. “You have another man in your life and you’re cheating on Brian!”

“Jesus Christ,” Justin said closing his eyes. “You’re the most irritating person I know, Mikey.”

“Stop calling me Mikey,” Michael told him stomping his foot on the floor.

Justin chuckled and took a sip of his beer.

“You stay away from Brian,” Michael told him. “He’s never going to choose you over me.”

“I knew you did crack behind all of our backs,” Justin said and started laughing.

“Fuck you,” Michael told him.

“You know,” Justin said. “I want to know what Brian fucking me has to do with him choosing you. Really? Explain it to me.”

Michael stayed quiet.

Justin shook his head. “You’re pathetic, Mikey.”

“Don’t fucking start,” Michael hissed.

Justin laughed as he took his beer. “Whatever,” he said as he walked away from the man. He reached inside his jeans and took out a bag of E’s. He dropped one in his mouth and sighed.

“Was that guy bothering you?” a guy asked as he stood in front of Justin.

“What is it to you?” Justin asked.

The man shrugged. “I’m Payton.”

Justin arched a brow as he drank from his beer. He lowered the bottle and went back to sticking his thumb at the opening of the bottle. He studied the man for a few seconds and then took a step closer. “And what did you have in mind?”

“Is your friend joining us?” Payton asked. “He’s looking at us.”

“He could drop dead right now for all I care,” Justin told him as he grabbed Payton’s crotch. “I think we have more important things to worry about.”

“We can go to my place,” Payton told him as his eyes closed.

“Good idea,” Justin said and walked away with the man.

“Where is Justin going?” Emmett asked Michael.

“That’s not my problem,” Michael hissed. He took Ted’s beer to him. Then they danced for a little bit while longer. He was growing inpatient. He needed to talk to Brian.

After a while they went back to the bar. Emmett and Damon were talking about Justin and he was sick of it. He decided to go find Brian in the backroom.

“Oh god yes,” the trick moaned.

Brian closed his eyes and pounded into the man bent in front of him. He heard the man moaning and screaming for more, so he gave him more. He pounded into him until they were both cumming. He pulled back and took off the condom.

“Wow,” the trick straightened up with the help of the wall. “Thank you.”

Brian didn’t say anything as he tucked his flaccid cock back on his pants. He turned around and found Michael staring at him. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you, Brian,” Michael told him.

Brian started walking out of the backroom.

“It’s about Justin,” Michael said trying to catch up with Brian. “He’s seeing another man.”

Brian turned to look at his friend. “What the fuck do I care?”

“He was holding his picture,” Michael said. “I saw him. And he looked broken hearted. I think he’s using you.”

Brian bit his lower lip and shook his head. “Why would you think I care?”

“I was just letting you know,” Michael said.

Brian shook his head and left Michael standing there. He didn’t even bother to look for Justin or say goodbye to the guys. He went straight home. When he was in his bed he thought about what Michael had said. Justin had never talked to him about having anyone else. But still he couldn’t push the thought out of his head. A little of him died as he closed his eyes. He had feelings for the blond and they were being crushed as he thought of Michael’s words.

Across town Payton sat in one of the plastic chairs in the hospital. Earlier when he and Justin had been at the apartment everything seemed fine. But then after they started kissing Justin had suddenly dropped to the floor with some kind of seizure. Payton called an ambulance and then searched Justin for the drugs. He threw them away and waited for the paramedics. He rode in the ambulance with the blond then he waited and prayed that Justin didn’t die.

***

_If I had the chance love, I would not hesitate  
To tell you all things I never said before_

Daphne knocked on the door for a long time. She was calling Brian as well but the man was nowhere to be found. She was about to turn to go back to the hospital when the door opened.

“What the fuck is going on?” Brian asked. His hair was pointing in every direction.

“Brian,” Daphne said sounding very serious. “Uh, I came to talk to you.”

“At this fucking hour?” Brian asked.

“What’s going on?” Damon asked as he walked over to them. He was rubbing his eyes and yawning.

“Justin is in the hospital,” Daphne informed them.

“What?” Damon asked.

Brian was frozen in place. He was already thinking the worst. “What happened to him?”

“He almost O.D.,” Daphne muttered with a sad and painful expression on her face. “I thought you would like to go see him.”

Brian nodded absently.

“I’m coming,” Damon announced as he walked to get some clothes.

Once they were ready they went downstairs.

“I came in a cab,” Daphne told them. “Should we take another one?”

“I have a car,” Brian said taking out the keys.

Daphne looked at the vehicle. “I thought Justin said you had a corvette.”

“It was totaled,” Brian informed her as he opened the door to the explorer. “This is safer anyway.”

Damon got in the back seat. Daphne was doing her seatbelt when her phone rang. Brian who had started to reverse the car stopped and stared at her with worry in his face.

“Yeah,” Daphne took a deep breath. “That’s great Mrs. Taylor. Okay. I’m on my way.”

“What happen?” Brian asked as soon as she closed her cell phone.

“Justin woke up,” Daphne told him. “He talked a bit and then went back to sleep.”

Brian nodded and put the car in drive. They were silent as they drove to the hospital.

“So you love this guy,” Damon commented suddenly.

“Shut the fuck up,” Brian told him.

Daphne bit her lower lip.

“I’m just saying,” Damon told him as he yawned. “You’re going to see him.”

“I’m his friend,” Brian told him. “I’m making sure he’s okay.”

“So you won’t mind if I try to date him?” Damon asked.

Brian stayed silent. Daphne frowned not sure they should be talking about Justin with her present.

“He wants me,” Damon said closing his eyes briefly. “I can feel it.”

“Shut the fuck up, Damon,” Brian hissed.

Damon opened his eyes and smirked. He leaned closer and licked his lips. “No, really, I think he does. I’m happy that I’m going to see him; make sure he’s okay. Also, I’m going to be there for him if he needs me.”

Brian stopped the car suddenly, the tires screeching from the abrupt halt. Daphne gasped and her hand automatically went to her chest. Damon arched a brow and wondered if he had hit a nerve.

“What’s going on?” Damon asked trying to hide his smile.

“Let me make something very clear to you,” Brian hissed. “Justin fucked you once and that’s all you’re ever going to get.”

“Brian,” Daphne muttered.

“What’s your problem?” Damon asked. “You said you two weren’t together.”

Brian glared at him.

“Why can’t I get an opportunity to be happy?” Damon asked and shrugged.

“We should be like...going to the hospital,” Daphne said but no one was listening to her. She sighed and shook her head, men; she would never completely understand them.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Brian asked. “Have you gone insane?”

“What?” Damon asked. “You two are not even an item.”

“We...kind...of are,” Brian said very slowly.

Daphne shook her head. “Look people.”

“You weren’t even listening to him,” Damon protested. “Everyone told you there was something wrong with him and you didn’t fucking listen!”

“I’m going to kill you!” Brian hissed as he undid his seatbelt. He turned around and grabbed Damon by the shirt. “He’s mine you fucking idiot!”

“Brain!” Daphne yelled and pushed Brian back. “Stop it!”

“You’re such a kid!” Damon said huffing.

Brian took a deep breath. He looked at Daphne and then at the dark road.

“But I’m glad that you could admit that you love him even if you didn’t say the actual words,” Damon said smirking.

Daphne looked back at the man and saw that he had been baiting his friend. She smiled a bit and looked at Brian.

“I’m going to kill you!” Brian yelled again as he tried to get at Damon who was laughing.

“Guys!” Daphne yelled again. “We’re supposed to be going to the hospital, remember?”

Brian controlled the urge to kill his friend and calmed himself down. He put his seatbelt on and then got back on the road.

“I was able to make him admit things this way all the time,” Damon said as he talked to Daphne. “Always did have to trick him to get what he was hiding.”

Daphne was trying really hard to hide her smile.

“And you and I both know how much he loves him,” Damon said. “Don’t worry Brian your secret is safe with us.”

Brian gripped the steering wheel and focused on getting to the hospital because if he didn’t he was going to stop again and bitch slap Damon. He couldn’t believe he had fallen for that old trick. He should have known better. “We’re here,” he said when the hospital came into view. “I’ll drop you two in the front while I go park.”

Damon and Daphne didn’t protest. They could hear how tense Brian was. The two of them waited for Brian at the entrance and then the three of them went inside.

“It’s this way,” Daphne, who had been there before, told them.

Brian followed in silence. He really hoped that Justin was okay.

“Do you know what happened?” Damon asked as they entered the elevator. “Why would he fucking take so many drugs?”

Daphne swallowed. “I guessed he…wanted to forget.”

“Forget what?” Brian asked frowning.

“That Alfred died on a day like this,” Daphne told them. “He was...”

“I know who he was,” Brian said cutting her shortly. He felt like such a shit. Justin had been calling out to him and he pushed him away. It was his fault.

Damon stayed quiet not sure what was going on. They walked out of the elevator when they got to the floor and went to Justin’s room.

“Jennifer,” Daphne said.

“Honey,” Jennifer smiled at her and then looked at Brian. “Brian,” Jennifer said walking over to him. She hugged him and Brian returned the hug.

“Is he okay?” Damon asked.

“He’s sleeping now,” Jennifer assured them. Then she turned to look at Damon. “Who is he?” Jennifer asked.

“Hi,” Damon said. “I’m a friend.”

Jennifer smiled at him and shook his hand.

Brian walked closer to Justin’s bed. “Is he okay? Is he really okay?”

“Yes,” Jennifer told him. “The doctor came to see him and said that Justin was going to wake up in a few hours. They had to...pump his stomach.”

Daphne put her arm around her waist. “He’s gong to be okay now.”

“Craig is home but he had to stay with Molly. He doesn’t know what happened exactly,” Jennifer told them not sure what else to say.

Brian didn’t say anything as he stared at the blond. He didn’t know why he was feeling trapped and scared.

“He will come here eventually,” Jennifer muttered more to herself than to them. She didn’t know how Craig was going to react when he learned the truth.

“Fuck you,” Brian hissed as he looked at Justin’s body. “Fuck you!!”

Jennifer looked up startled. Damon frowned never having seen Brian who was usually so in control, falling apart. His friend wasn’t pissed at all but he was very vulnerable and he could see it. For the first time in a long time Brian was afraid. He was fucking terrified that Justin could be there one second and gone the next.

“I think we should go outside for a few minutes,” Daphne said putting her arm around Jennifer’s shoulder. “Come on Damon, you could get us some coffees.”

“Okay,” Damon looked at Brian and sighed. “I’m out there if you need me, Bri.”

“I...” Jennifer frowned and looked away from Brian to her son. “Okay.”

Once they walked away Brian took Justin’s hand in his. A single tear ran down his face and he cleaned it quickly. “Why?” Brian asked as he dropped his forehead against Justin. “Don’t you know Justin?”

Justin was deep in sleep and it didn’t look like he was coming around anytime soon.

“Oh, Jus,” Brian sighed. “I need you. You little shit.”


	11. Coping With The Truth

_There’s nothing but pills and  
Ashes under my skin_

Justin sat on the hospital bed waiting for someone to come and tell him he could go. If he stayed there a minute longer he would try to kill himself for real. His mother was driving him crazy enough demanding answers. He didn’t have any.

“Hello,” Payton said knocking on the open door. “Can I come in?”

Justin arched a brow.

“It’s me Payton,” the man told him.

“I know who you are,” Justin replied.

“I came to see how you were doing?” Payton said.

“I’m peachy,” Justin informed him in a sarcastic voice.

“You really scared me,” Payton told him as he came closer to the bed.

“That was my intention all along,” Justin said.

“I threw the drugs away,” Payton muttered weary of Justin’s attitude. “I told the policemen and doctors that someone must have slipped something to you.”

“Great, now they’ll be looking for a culprit,” Justin told him.

“I was trying to help you out,” Payton stated.

Justin sighed. “Thanks.”

Payton smiled. “Are they releasing you soon?”

Justin shrugged not having a clue. He was already planning his escape.

“I thought that we could do something,” Payton said. “I really like you.”

Justin looked at Payton and wanted to die. He hadn’t even fucked the man and Payton was already following him around.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Justin said.

“Why not?” Payton asked.

Justin shrugged. “It’s not a good idea.”

Payton sighed.

“Justin,” Jennifer said coming into the room with Brian and Daphne behind her.

“How are you doing?” Daphne asked.

“I’m fucking peachy,” Justin told her.

“Honey,” Jennifer chastised in a light tone. “Who is this?”

“I’m Payton,” he informed them. “I’m the guy that called the ambulance.”

“Oh thank god,” Jennifer said and went to hug him.

Justin rolled his eyes and instead concentrated on Brian who was giving him an unreadable expression. After a few minutes he decided that Brian was pissed.

“Did the doctor talk to you?” Daphne asked.

Justin shook his head. “What are you doing here?”

“We came to see how you were doing,” Jennifer said.

“So you are Justin’s mother I assume,” Payton said as he looked at Jennifer.

“Yes,” Jennifer confirmed. “This is Daphne, Justin’s best friend and Brian, Justin’s boyfriend.”

“Mother,” Justin growled.

Daphne bit her lower lip so she wouldn’t laugh. Justin was acting like a kid.

Justin frowned when Brian moved closer to him. “You are not going to hold my hand, are you?”

“No,” Brian said. “But I could kick you ass.”

“We talked about this, Brian,” Jennifer said.

“What is this?” Justin asked. “Did you and my mother bond while I was unconscious?”

“You mean dying,” Brian said.

Justin started pouting. He really needed to leave the hospital.

“I think we should let Justin rest,” Daphne told Jennifer who nodded consent.

Jennifer wanted to give Brian and Justin privacy and added, “Come on Payton. Let me buy you lunch.”

Payton nodded and looked at Justin. He could tell that Brian and Justin had something between them. “I’ll see you Justin.”

Justin didn’t answer.

“So?” Brian asked as he sat on the edge of the bed when everyone else had left.

“So,” Justin repeated.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Brian asked.

“I don’t owe you any explanations,” Justin told him.

“Fucker,” Brian said.

Justin glared at him. “Get out of here. I don’t need you.”

“Morning,” the doctor said as he came in.

Brian got off the bed and stood next to Justin.

“We ran some tests Mr. Taylor,” Doctor Collin told him. “There is a high amount of drugs in your bloodstream.”

Justin stared at the doctor not flinching for a second. “So?”

“Did you try to end your life, Mr. Taylor?” the doctor asked.

“I did not,” Justin told him. “It was an accident.”

“We are going to release you under the care of Dr. Mitchell Phillip,” Collin informed him. “He’s a psychologist and very good at his job.”

“I don’t need to see a shrink, I am not crazy,” Justin told him.

“It’s either that or you will be committed to the mental ward Mr. Taylor,” the doctor said as he wrote something in his chart. “You know the loony bin.”

Brian arched a brow. He liked the doctor’s attitude.

“You decide,” Doctor Collin told him.

“Fine,” Justin hissed. “Whatever. When can I leave?”

“Today,” Collin replied. “Here are some papers you need to sign. I’ll come back in a while and explain everything to you.”

Justin sighed as he leaned back on the hospital bed. “My life is just great.”

“You could have died,” Brian pointed out as he pulled a chair closer and sat down.

“At least if I were dead I wouldn’t have to deal with all of you; I wouldn’t have to go through all this crap,” Justin retorted.

“They care about you,” Brian pointed out.

“They shouldn’t even bother,” Justin said. “Apparently I’m nothing but a suicidal junkie.”

Brian stared at him. “Well, you might be worth it. I’m here even though I have a million things to do.”

“Then go and do them,” Justin said.

“They can wait,” Brian whispered.

“You are so annoying,” Justin informed him.

“Don’t compare me with Mikey,” Brian joked. “And just for that you’ll get punished.”

Justin turned on his side with a little smile in place. He really wanted to be out of the hospital and to receive his punishment by Brian.

***

_No, you don’t know what_  
It’s like when nothing feels  
Alright, you don’t know what  
It’s like to be like me 

Justin closed the door to his apartment and smelled the food. “Who the fuck is here?”

“Me,” Daphne called out.

Justin sighed.

“And Brian too,” she informed him.

“That’s just great,” Justin muttered as he walked to the kitchen. “What are you guys doing here?”

“We wanted to do something nice for you,” Daphne said. “I made dinner.”

“I entertained myself watching your porn collection,” Brian told him.

Justin looked at Brian. “Did you like it?”

“Very interesting variety you have,” Brian replied.

Justin smiled wickedly. “Maybe we could try a few things later.”

Daphne rolled her eyes at their banter. She went back to finishing dinner. When it was ready they all sat at the table to eat.

“So, how was it?” Daphne asked.

Justin frowned knowing exactly what she wanted to know. “The food is great, Daph.”

Daphne sighed. “That’s not what I meant. I know my cooking is good, Brian is eating.”

Brian narrowed his eyes at her before he swallowed. “Whatever.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Justin told her and got up from table.

“Justin,” Daphne protested. “Come back and eat your food.”

“You are not my mother,” Justin spat out.

“Now, now children, no bickering at the table,” Brian teased. “And you better start talking Justin. The faster she knows what happen the faster she will leave us alone and we can fuck.”

“Is that all you think about?” Daphne asked Brian.

Justin sat back at the table with an amused smile. “I went to see Mitchell.”

“Is that the nutcase doctor?” Brian asked.

“Brian!” Daphne shrieked. “Shut the fuck up.”

Justin laughed.

“What?” Brian asked like an innocent kid.

Daphne rolled her eyes and looked at Justin. “What did he tell you?”

“That it was okay to be me,” Justin told her. “He said I could do whatever I wanted to do and talk about whatever I feel like.”

“What did you guys talked about?” Daphne asked.

“I think that would be too personal to repeat,” Brian muttered.

“Shut up,” Daphne said.

“We didn’t talk about anything,” Justin replied. “I sat down and waited for the hour to be done.”

“Are you shitting me?” Daphne asked. “You are supposed to be talking about your problems with him.”

“Like fuck I will,” Justin said. “What the hell for? I don’t have any problems.”

“You are living in denial,” Daphne accused him.

“No, Daph,” Brian told her. “This is not Egypt it’s good old Pittsburgh.”

Justin chuckled.

“You are not helping,” Daphne hissed.

“I didn’t say I would,” Brian pointed out.

“Ugh,” Daphne grunted. “You two are so fucking frustrating.”

“You have no patience,” Brian told her.

There was a knock on the door.

“Are you waiting for someone?” Daphne asked getting up.

“God, let that be anyone else but my mother,” Justin muttered.

“Close,” Brian whispered.

Justin sighed when his father walked inside the dinning room. “What are you doing here?”

“Your mother told me what happened! What the fuck were you thinking?” Craig asked.

Justin got up from the table. “I am not going to do this with you.”

“Justin!” Craig hissed. “Do not walk away from me.”

“I want you out of my house!” Justin yelled. “I have nothing to say to you!”

“You have some explaining to do young man,” Craig shouted back.

“I have nothing to explain to you,” Justin told him in a deadly tone.

Brian got up. He knew that tone. “Justin, relax.”

“He has no fucking right to ask for answers,” Justin told Brian. “He doesn’t know shit about my life or the things I have gone through.”

“You’re my son,” Craig told him. “I have every right.”

“You’re son? I haven’t been your son since I told you I was gay. Or did you forget how your throw me out and disowned me? You don’t know shit about me!” Justin hissed. “Nothing!”

Craig shook his head. “You are my son. And I know you. I said sorry about what happened when you were younger.”

“That’s not good enough,” Justin spat out. “Not good enough at all!”

“Justin,” Brian said as he held on to the agitated blond. “Just relax. Let it go.”

Justin closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Dad, what do you think I would do if my friend Pete was in trouble?”

“Help him,” Craig said not knowing what Justin’s friend had to do with their conversation.

“What would I really do Brian?” Justin asked.

“Nothing,” Brian told him seeing clearly what the blond had done.

“What?” Craig asked.

Daphne sighed. “He doesn’t have a friend named Pete.”

Craig felt like he had been slapped in the face. He could see now that his son was right. He didn’t know shit about him. He hadn’t even realized that his son had set him up. “Justin…I…this has nothing to do with that.

“It has everything to do with it,” Justin told him trying to keep calm. “How dare you demand answers from me when you don’t know me? You don’t even know who my friends are, you don’t know me. You stopped being my father a long time ago.”

“I think it’s best if you leave,” Brian told him.

Craig wanted to be pissed at the man. He sighed and started walking to the door. “I’m sorry, Justin.”

Justin shook his head, turned his back on his father and started walking towards his room. His father had no right to tell him anything; no right at all.

***

_Talk to me I can feel you falling  
And I wanted to be all you need_

“How are you doing?” Daphne asked.

“Daphne,” Justin said sternly. “I need to be alone.”

“I’m just worried about you,” Daphne told him.

“I know that,” Justin said reaching for his cigarette box.

“You have been here for hours,” Daphne told him. “Brian left and came back and left and now he is here again. I ran out of things to say to him.”

Justin sighed. “Then I guess he will leave again and come back. Maybe he’s waiting for you to go so he can come in here and fuck me.”

“Justin,” Daphne sighed. “Could you stop being so damn sarcastic for once?”

“I was being serious,” Justin told her as he lit the cigarette.

Daphne sighed. “Do you want something to eat?”

“Don’t you have things to do?” Justin asked.

“You come first right now,” Daphne told him.

“Thanks Daph,” Justin told her. “Get me a drink then.”

“No,” Daphne told him. “Jesus you are so incorrigible.”

Justin laughed. “So does that mean you will get me a drink?”

Daphne growled. “No!”

“What’s going on?” Brian asked.

“He’s being a prick,” Daphne accused.

“She’s being a pain in the ass,” Justin informed Brian.

Brian rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Why did I even bother asking?”

“He won’t eat,” Daphne told him. “He has to eat.”

“What are you going to do? Force feed him,” Brian said as he sat on the bed.

“You could help me,” Daphne teased.

“Don’t even,” Justin hissed.

“You have to talk to us,” Daphne said getting serious.

Justin frowned. “I don’t want to talk about anything. I want to be left alone.”

Brian looked at the blond. “We are not going to talk about it anymore.”

“Don’t help,” Daphne hissed at Brian.

“Okay fine,” Justin told her. “Get me something to eat. Not too much though.”

Brian watched her go and turned to Justin.

“She won’t leave me alone,” Justin said. “This way I’ll have ten minutes of peace.”

Brian chuckled and moved closer to the blond. He grabbed the cigarette away from Justin and smashed it against the ashtray. He smiled at the blond and then leaned forward to kiss him. Justin threw his arms around the brunet.

“You feel so good,” Justin muttered.

Brian smirked. “I always do.”

Justin laughed and leaned his forehead against Brian’s.

“How are you doing?” Brian asked.

“I’m okay,” Justin muttered. “Really.”

“You don’t have to say anything,” Brian told him. “I understand.”

Justin hugged him to him. Brian just held him like that. He didn’t want to rush Justin to talk.

“Here,” Daphne said entering into the room with a tray.

“That was fast,” Justin told her.

“I know,” Daphne said.

“Thanks,” Justin told her and took the food.

Brian and Daphne talked about trivial stuff while Justin ate some food. When he put the tray away Daphne started complaining that he barely ate.

“It’s time for you to go, Daph,” Justin told her.

Daphne sighed. “Fine. I know when I’m not wanted.”

“It’s not that, Daph,” Justin told her.

Daphne arched a brow.

“I’m horny and I want to fuck Brian,” Justin told her.

“Jesus Christ, Justin,” Daphne said and laughed.

Brian smirked.

“If you need anything just let me know,” Daphne said.

Justin nodded.

Daphne went to the kitchen to drop off the dirty dishes in the sink. She grabbed her coat and gloves and went back to the room to say goodbye. She stopped at the doorway and stared at Justin. The blond was trying to burrow himself closer to Brian as if that were even possible.

She felt happy that Justin had someone who could be there for him. But she felt sad that it wasn’t her. For as long as she remembered Justin always ran to her. She would be the one to hold him and tell him that it would be okay. She moved away from them to let them have their privacy. Then she started to see that she would always be Justin’s best friend but now Brian would be number one in Justin’s life and she had to accept it no matter how hard it was.

***

_I can see the pain in you_  
I can see the love in you  
But fighting all the demons  
Will take time, it will take time 

Brian was glad that the door to Justin’s apartment was unlocked. The blond had called him about twenty minutes ago and had demanded his presence at the apartment immediately. Any other time Brian would have told Justin to fuck off because he wasn’t going to let the blond tell him what to do. But there was something in Justin’s voice that put him on the edge. “Justin!”

“What the fuck do you want?” Justin asked from the studio.

Brian went over to him. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” Justin informed him.

“You were the one that called,” Brian hissed.

Justin turned around and looked at Brian. He got up from his chair and walked over to the brunet. “You took an eternity to get here.”

Brian sighed. “What do you want?”

“I want to fuck you,” Justin said as he kissed Brian’s neck.

“Is that so?” Brian asked.

“Yeah,” Justin growled. “Don’t deny me. I’m in a weak state of mind.”

“That’s useful,” Brian said as he let the blond push him back against the wall.

Justin smiled from ear to ear. “Do you want me to fuck you, Brian?”

Brian licked his lips.

“Your silence could be interpreted in many ways,” Justin whispered as he started to open Brian’s pants.

Justin kneeled in front of Brian happy to find that the brunet wasn’t wearing any underwear. He pulled out Brian’s erection his hands slowly jerking him off. He licked his lips and then took the head of Brian’s cock in his mouth. His tongue swirled around the head and then dipped into the man’s piss hole.

“God,” Brian groaned as his hands grabbed Justin’s head. His fingers wrapped around the blond’s locks.

Justin grabbed the edges of Brian’s jeans and pushed them down. He pulled back from Brian and got up. “Take off your clothes,” he told him as he left the studio.

Brian got rid of his clothes. When Justin came back he was wearing only a pair of jeans. He had a few condoms in one hand and the lube in the other. He put them on the floor and smiled sinfully at the brunet. Brian arched a brow and pulled the blond into his arms.

Justin grabbed Brian’s wrist when the brunet tried to grab his butt. “Let’s get on the floor first.”

Brian and Justin kneeled in front of each other. Justin pushed Brian back.

“I want to rim you,” Justin told him. “Turn around.”

Brian sighed. “You are not fucking me. I’m not up for it today.”

“I just want to rim you,” Justin told him.

Brian turned around and closed his eyes as soon as Justin’s hands grabbed his ass cheeks. He felt Justin grabbing one of his wrists but didn’t think anything of it. Justin smirked and pulled a pair of cuffs from his back pockets. He fastened them around Brian’s wrist and quickly pulled the other wrist close so he could handcuff Brian.

“What the fuck do you think you are doing?” Brian asked angry. He tried to move but Justin was straddling his thighs and his hands were bound on his back. “This is not funny.”

“You look so hot,” Justin told him. He moved away and pulled Brian’s hips up. “Come on, on your knees.”

“Fuck off!” Brian hissed.

“I want to rim you,” Justin told him. “I’ll let you go then.”

Brian sighed. He took a deep breath. He knew Justin well enough to know that the blond wouldn’t let him go even if he threatened to kill him. He got on his knees and felt Justin’s crotch pressing to his ass. Justin leaned down so he could whisper in Brian’s ear.

“Don’t you love it, Brian?” Justin asked. “You are so hopeless now. Doesn’t it turn you on?”

Brian tried to suppress a groan but couldn’t. He could feel Justin’s hard cock pressing against him.

“It makes me horny,” Justin said in a husky voice. “The mere thought of being inside of you while you can’t do anything about it.”

“Stop it,” Brian gasped.

“You don’t want me to stop,” Justin informed him. “You want me to fuck you senseless.”

Brian squirmed as he felt Justin’s lubed finger enter him. “You said you were going to rim me.”

“I lied,” Justin replied. “You are so hard right now.”

“That was there before this started,” Brian defended.

“Bullshit,” Justin hissed. “You love this; you don’t want me to stop. In fact you are so close to begging me for more.”

Brian closed his eyes and tried to breath. He tried to keep still as the blond finger fucked him but his hips seemed to have a brain of their own.

“See,” Justin whispered.

“I’m going to kill you for this,” Brian informed him.

Justin laughed. Brian always said that when he did something that he wasn’t expecting. But Justin knew that Brian loved every second of it. The younger man unbuttoned his pants and then unzipped them. He grabbed a condom as he pushed his jeans down to the middle of his thighs. He licked his lips as he opened the square foil and took the condom out.

“Justin,” Brian groaned.

“Don’t worry,” Justin told him. “My cock is going to be in your tight ass in no time.”

Brian lifted his shoulders up and Justin pushed him back down. Justin gripped Brian’s arms and licked his neck. Brian’s body trembled; he felt the tip of Justin’s cock at his entrance. Then Justin was pushing inside of him.

“Oh god,” Brian moaned.

Justin pulled his upper body when he was half way inside of Brian. He grabbed the brunet’s hips and pulled them back into his cock.

“Justin!” Brian yelled.

“I never said I would be gentle,” Justin moaned. “Fuck, you are so tight.”

Brian growled as Justin started hammering inside of him. He was still for a few seconds and then started rocking back into the blond. He could feel the hard, cement floor digging into his shoulders but he didn’t care. His walls gripped around Justin’s cock and he moaned.

“Yes,” Justin hissed. “Fuck, Brian. So good.”

Brian’s body arched when Justin angled his hips to hit his prostate over and over again. He felt his cock about to fall off if Justin’s didn’t touch him. “Justin.”

Justin just gripped Brian’s hips tighter and hammered faster. He knew what the brunet wanted but he wasn’t going to touch Brian.

“Justin!” Brian growled.

Justin leaned closer to Brian once again. His hands gripped the brunet’s hair and pulled his head back to expose the man’s neck. Justin licked it from the base until he reached Brian’s chin. “So tasty,” he muttered.

“Touch me,” Brian told him.

“Let me hear you,” Justin instructed.

Brian shut his eyes. Justin laughed and bit Brian’s neck at the base. His fingers brushed against Brian’s piss hole and Brian came. Brian yelled as his orgasm shook him. He couldn’t believe it. It felt so good as Justin kept ramming into him.

“You are my dirty old man,” Justin told him.

Brian was feeling so exposed as Justin took control of everything. The blond was clawing at his skin. He could smell the sweat and cum in the air. It drove him crazy. Justin groaned as he reached his climax. His fingers buried on Brian’s skin.

“That was so good,” Justin muttered when he found his voice.

“Let me go,” Brian demanded.

“Of course,” Justin said as he slowly pulled out of Brian. He got rid of the condom and stood up. He zipped his pants and reached for the key inside his pockets. He took the handcuffs off Brian and then walked to the living room.

Brian kneeled on the floor rubbing his shoulders. Part of his neck was sore from the weight it had sustained and the other side was aching from where Justin had bit him. He stood up on shaky legs and felt his hole on fire. He was so going to kill Justin.

“You are an asshole,” Brian hissed as he walked to the kitchen to grab some napkins. He cleaned his abdomen and chest. When that was done he walked back to where Justin was.

“You loved it,” Justin replied as he sat on the sofa smoking a cigarette.

Brian wanted to argue about it. He wanted to deny it but he couldn’t. Justin had never taken him like that before, he had enjoyed every second of it. He sat next to the blond and Justin caressed his face. Brian frowned seeing how sad Justin looked.

“Jus,” Brian muttered.

“What?” Justin asked.

“I’m here for you,” Brian said and swallowed. He felt so raw talking about his feeling with the blond. “I know things will get better.”

Justin looked away. “I’m okay, now, Brian.”

Brian caressed Justin’s hair. “Now, who is lying?”

Justin got up from the sofa. “I don’t want to talk about this,” he walked away and got rid of his cigarette. When he came back he was holding a black scarf.

Brian sighed. Justin got on Brian’s lap with a leg on either side.

“Want to use this on me?” Justin asked as he showed Brian the scarf.

Brian took them with a smile on his face. He could also see love in Justin’s eyes. Love for him but Brian didn’t ever think he would find someone who would love him like the blond did. So he would be there for Justin trying to make it better, no matter how much time it took the blond to let go of all the pain.

***

_You figured me out  
I’m lost and I’m hopeless_

Justin looked at his watch and sighed. He still had another thirty minutes left.

“Are you going to keep giving me the silent treatment?” Mitchell asked.

“You said I could do whatever I wanted as long as I felt comfortable,” Justin pointed out.

“Do you feel comfortable?” Mitchell asked him.

“Yes,” Justin answered.

“You are not cooperating,” Mitchell said.

“Am I supposed to?” Justin asked.

“Don’t you want to get better?” Mitchell asked.

Justin sighed. “There is nothing wrong with me.”

Mitchell sighed. “Tell me how you’re doing Justin.”

“Same old, same old,” Justin drawled. “How are you doc?”

“We are not here for me,” Mitchell informed him. He was having a hard time with Justin. They weren’t making progress at all. “Tell me something about yourself, Justin.”

“I’m annoyed and I want to go home,” Justin said. “How is that for sharing my feelings, doc?”

“What do you want Justin?” Mitchell asked. He wasn’t going to give up.

“I want to be home painting,” Justin told him.

“So you are an artist?” Mitchell asked.

“Yes,” Justin answered. “Are you done with the questions?”

“We are trying to get to the root of the problem,” Mitchell explained. “We want to find out why you tried to kill yourself.”

“I think me being an artist has nothing to do with it,” Justin told him. “Oh, and I didn’t try shit,” Justin hissed. “I didn’t know what I had taken. I lost count for fucks sakes.”

“You think its okay to take drugs?” Mitchell asked him.

“Do you think it’s wrong to take drugs?” Justin asked. “It’s my fucking body I can do whatever I want with it.”

“They kill you slowly,” Mitchell told him.

“As opposed to a car hitting you and you dying instantly?” Justin asked and looked at the psychologist.

Mitchell was going in circles with the blond. “What do you want right now?” Mitchell asked.

“A strong drink,” Justin said.

“What else?” Mitchell asked and observed Justin’s body posture.

“To be home,” Justin said as he got up. He walked closer to the window.

“That’s all you want,” the man said.

“For now,” Justin answered. “Are you going to keep asking me stupid questions?”

“Go home, Justin,” Mitchell said as he stood up. “I’ll see you next week.”

“Great,” Justin told him sarcastically. “I can’t wait.”

“You do know I am not going to release you until you fix your problem,” Mitchell warned him. “It’s for your own good.”

“You do know I could care less,” Justin stated. “See you next week, doc.”

Mitchell shook his head. He didn’t know how else he was going to deal with the blond.

Justin closed the door behind him and let out a deep breath. “Fuck,” he hissed and walked away from the office.

Justin was going to go home but ended up going to the loft. He didn’t bother to knock like he would do any other time. He went inside and Brian was sitting at the desk.

“What’s going on?” Brian asked seeing Justin’s face.

“Mitchell is driving me insane,” Justin told him.

“What are you doing here?” Brian asked and kissed him when Justin stood next to him.

Justin smiled. “I wanted to see you.”

“You mean?” Brian asked as he grinned.

“I wanted to fuck you,” Justin informed him.

“I’m going out,” Brian told him. “To Babylon.”

“Oh well,” Justin said. “I’ll go with you. I’ll find some hot guy who is willing to drop his pants for me.”

“I thought you would stay out of those places,” Brian muttered.

Justin pulled away and exclaimed, “Fucking hell not you too!”

Brian sighed as he saw the blond walking to the bedroom. He stayed sitting at his desk but he wasn’t doing much. He got up after a while and found Justin naked under the duvet.

“Aren’t you going to Babylon?” Justin asked when Brian started to undress.

“What are you going to do?” Brian asked.

“I’ll stay here and be the good boy everyone wants me to be,” Justin retorted.

Brian sat on the bed. His hand caressed Justin’s chest. “It’s funny,” Brian said. “I thought you would have been more careful.”

Justin looked at Brian briefly. He felt like he was trapped. Brian stared at Justin and he didn’t have to ask. He just knew. He looked away his face twisting with pain. He felt tears coming to him and he pushed them away.

“Brian,” Justin muttered.

“You’re such an asshole,” Brian said and sniffed. He got up quickly and stayed with his back to the blond.

Justin took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Brian.”

“No,” Brian said as he got up and walked away from the blond.

Justin got out of the bed quickly and went to follow the brunet. “Brian!”

“No!” Brian hissed. “I don’t want to hear it!”

Justin took a step back. He could see that Brian was about to bolt from the place. He looked like a wild animal that had been caged. Justin wanted to take all the pain he had caused away from the brunet. “Okay,” Justin said.

Brian stopped pacing and looked at Justin.

“Okay,” Justin repeated as tears started to drop.

“Justin,” Brian muttered.

“Okay!” Justin yelled. “I did it!”

“Shut the fuck up!” Brian shouted.

“I wanted to die!” Justin confessed. “And I didn’t even plan it. I never spent hours of the day wishing I were dead. It wasn’t like that. It was only for a second that I really didn’t care anymore. There was nothing to care about,” he said before he turned around and went back to the bedroom.

Brian stood still. He had known the truth but was afraid to admit it even to himself. He closed his eyes and felt tears threatening to come out. And he hated Justin for doing that to him. He had never wanted to care about Justin in the first place and now that he did the blond wanted to end his life so easily. Slowly, he went back to the bedroom.

Justin had his head on the pillow and he was crying. Brian got on the bed and pulled him to his warm embrace. Justin’s head rested on the crook of Brian’s neck. The blond threw his arms around Brian’s shoulders and held him tight.

Brian ran his fingers through Justin’s hair over and over again. It felt like an eternity before he heard himself say, “I want you to stay.”

And Justin understood Brian Kinney speak 101. He could hear it clearly even though Brian didn’t say those exact words; he meant that he wanted Justin to stay alive.

***

_But I fear I have_  
Nothing to give and I  
Have so much to lose 

Justin was watching Daphne and felt like strangling her. He looked at her cooking and he wanted kick her ass. He wasn’t a baby and he didn’t need anyone taking care of him.

“When are you going to leave me alone?” Justin asked.

“Never,” Daphne answered without looking up.

“You are worse than my mother,” Justin informed her.

“Yeah right,” Daphne drawled.

“You are pestering me,” Justin said. “Did you know that?”

“I had an idea,” Daphne retorted.

Justin rolled his eyes and went to grab something to drink. He needed something if he was going to deal with Daphne.

“What are you doing?” Daphne asked when she turned around and saw Justin with a drink in his hand.

“What does it look like?” Justin asked.

“You are not allowed to be drinking or taking any other drugs,” Daphne hissed.

“Don’t worry,” Justin said. “You are watching me. I won’t roll over and die while you are here.”

Daphne glared at him. She felt like slapping him over and over again.

“I’m not hungry by the way,” Justin said. “And I have a lot of work to do.”

“Well, you are going to eat,” Daphne told him.

“I’m stronger than you,” Justin pointed out. “You can’t force feed me.”

Daphne was so going to kill him. “I’ll call Brian.”

“I’ll threaten to mutilate his clothes,” Justin spat out. “He won’t dare try it.”

“I’ll call your mother,” Daphne said.

“Do you want me to kick you out of my apartment?” Justin asked.

“I have a key,” Daphne pointed out.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” Justin hissed. “And you wonder why I drink. You are so fucking annoying. I want to be alone. Don’t worry Daph you won’t find me tomorrow with my wrists slashed.”

“Don’t fucking joke like that,” Daphne yelled.

“I’m being serious,” Justin told her.

“Justin,” Daphne started.

“I don’t want to fucking hear it,” Justin yelled. He grabbed the bottle of whisky as he walked to his bedroom. “Everyone has something to say. I’m fucking tired of it.”

Daphne sighed and finished cooking. She knew it would be hopeless to make Justin eat. He was in one of his darks moods.

“Hey,” Brian said entering into the apartment. “Does Justin ever lock this door?”

“Do you knock anymore?” Daphne asked.

Brian smirked and shrugged. “Where is he?”

“His room,” Daphne informed him. “Do you want to eat something?”

“Not really,” Brian answered.

Daphne nodded and started taking out the bowls to put everything away. She was so tired of fighting with Justin.

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked her.

“Justin’s been drinking,” Daphne told him.

Brian nodded slowly. He wished he could slap some sense into the blond.

“I tried to talk to him but he won’t listen,” Daphne informed him. “Maybe you could say something, he might listen to you.”

“He’s a big boy,” Brian drawled.

“Drop the bullshit,” Daphne said dryly. “I already have to deal with him. I can’t handle the both of you.”

Brian shrugged. “There is nothing I can do.”

“You haven’t even tried,” Daphne snapped.

“I’ve been trying!” Brian hissed.

Daphne stayed quiet.

“I’m trying to help him as best as I can,” Brian informed her. “And I haven’t been successful. Nothing I say or do helps. He will still do whatever the fuck he wants.”

Daphne looked at the brunet and saw how it all was affecting Brian.

“And I am tired of this,” Brian hissed. “I’m tired.”

“Scared,” Daphne told him. “You are fucking scared.”

Brian stared at her and shook his head slowly. “You don’t know shit about me.”

Daphne started laughing. “You are just like him.”

Brian frowned and walked towards Daphne. “What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know,” Daphne said. “But I’m scared too.”

Brian wanted to run away from her. She was scaring him. He didn’t think anyone knew how scared he was of losing Justin. He wanted the blond to get better, because it didn’t matter how many times Justin told him that it was all okay, he couldn’t believe him.

“I guess all we can do is be here for him,” Daphne told him.

“I won’t let him do this to me,” Brian hissed.

“You love him,” Daphne said. “I love him too, he’s my best friend. I’m scared too. Do you think its easy knowing what he tried to do? I feel helpless.”

Brian closed his eyes. He didn’t want to hear her.

“Could you two stop arguing about me,” Justin said as he came to the living room. “I was trying to sleep.”

Daphne sighed. “I should go.”

Brian and Justin didn’t say a word to each other as Daphne gathered her things. “The food is there if you feel like eating.”

“I think I should go too,” Brian said and went to kiss Justin.

Justin pulled back. “You know if you don’t want to be here, don’t be here.”

Brian sighed. “It’s not like that, Justin.”

“Then how the fuck is it, Brian?” Justin asked. “I never asked for your help.”

Brian was getting angry.

“I can take care of myself,” Justin informed him. “What I do with my life is my fucking problem.”

Brian glared at him. “Oh, so it doesn’t affect anyone else?”

Justin licked his lips. “And why does it affect you?”

Brian shook his head. “You are right. It doesn’t mean shit to me,” he hissed and turned around to leave. He was tired of Justin pretending that nothing had happened. He wanted to help him but it was pointless and he wasn’t going to stay and let the blond walk all over him. He hated the way it made him feel.

“Bitch,” Justin muttered when Brian had left.

“Twat,” Brian hissed as he walked to his car.

Justin went to his bedroom and tried not to think about Brian while Brian went home and tried not to think about the blond. Both of their attempts were hopeless.

***

_Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me_

Justin heard the knocking and he hoped it would go away. He stayed there for about fifteen more minutes before he couldn’t take it anymore. He got up and went to answer the door.

“What the fuck do you want?” Justin asked.

“Good fucking morning to you too,” Brian said as he pushed his way inside.

“What are you doing here?” Justin asked.

“I brought you breakfast,” Brian told him as he walked to the kitchen. “I brought hot chocolate too.”

Justin closed the door and followed Brian. He wanted to tell the man to just leave everything and go but a part of him was happy that the brunet was there.

“So,” Brian said. “Are you hungry?”

“Sure,” Justin answered.

“Look,” Brian stopped what he was doing. “You acted like a total asshole to me yesterday.”

Justin narrowed his eyes at Brian. “Fuck you.”

“Not now, Justin, I’m trying to say something,” Brian said.

“Brian,” Justin started rubbing his temples. “Do you know how complicated and frustrating you are?”

“Justin,” Brian replied. “You are just the same way.”

“Then what the fuck are you still doing here?” Justin asked him. “What do you want from me?”

“I don’t know,” Brian told him. “I...I care about you Justin.”

Justin’s hand lowered to his sides. He looked at the brunet and started to bite his lower lip.

“So, I care if you weren’t here,” Brian told him. “It affects me when you...try to hurt yourself.”

Justin wrapped his arms around himself. “I’m sorry about...what I said.”

Brian rolled his lips inside him mouth. They stared at each other for a few seconds.

“Uh, so are you going to eat this?” Brian asked.

Justin walked over to him. “Okay. You’ll eat some too, right?”

“Okay,” Brian agreed.

Justin was about to take his plate but stopped himself. Instead, his arms wrapped around Brian’s waist and pulled him close. Brian hugged the blond as well.

“You are pretty amazing,” Justin told him.

“Don’t say that too loud,” Brian said and chuckled.

They pulled away and kissed.

“Let’s stop this,” Brian told him. “Eat first.”

“Shit,” Justin said and grinned. “You really care, don’t you?”

“I do,” Brian told him and looked away.

“I care about you too,” Justin said. “That wasn’t a lie before.”

Brian smiled and nodded.

“Jeez, if I was you I wouldn’t be here after having found out how fucked up I am,” Justin muttered.

“You are not me,” Brian told him.

Justin bit his lower lip and nodded.

“I’m not a prize either,” Brian arched a brow as Justin looked at him with a wicked smile. “Well in all aspects I am usually perfect, but I do have my drama queen moments,” he smirked.

Justin laughed and grabbed his food. “Come on.”

Brian followed Justin to the table.

“Hey,” Justin said. “As a thank you. I might dance for you on this table again.”

Brian’s cock hardened. “Eat. Fast.”

Justin smiled and took his time eating. He was partly doing it to tease the brunet but another part of him enjoyed spending time with the taller man. He wasn’t sure why Brian kept coming around but he was happy that the brunet did.

Brian watched as Justin ate, happy to see the blond smiling. He didn’t know why he kept coming back to the blond but he was happy that Justin let him.


	12. Not Able To Let Go Of Each Other

_I’m tugging at my hair,_  
I’m pulling at my clothes,  
I’m trying to keep my cool  
I know it shows 

Justin came out of the shower and grabbed his blue towel. He dried up as quickly as he could and went to his closet to get something to wear. He grabbed a pair of gray slacks and shook his head letting them fall to the floor. He looked around and smiled when he spotted his black dress pants. He pulled them out and took them to the bed.

“Justin,” Daphne said coming into the room. “I was knocking like crazy.”

“Sorry, I’m kind of busy,” Justin told her.

“What are you dong?” she asked like a little girl.

“I’m getting dressed,” Justin told her as he went back to the closet. He stared really hard as he looked for something seductive to wear.

“So where are you going?” Daphne asked as she sat on the bed.

“Watch the pants,” Justin warned her without turning around.

“What’s with you?” Daphne asked.

“I want to look nice,” Justin told her.

Daphne frowned. “You always look banging.”

“Thanks,” Justin told her pulling out a blue sweater. “Fuck no,” he said and dropped it on the floor.

Daphne knew something was going on. The only time that Justin took his time dressing up was when he was having an important meeting. At this time of the day she knew that couldn’t be it. “So, what’s going on?”

“I have a date,” Justin informed her.

“With whom?” Daphne asked frowning. “And I thought you swore you would never go out on a date ever in your life.”

Justin sighed as he pulled a dark gray v-neck sweater. He turned around and smiled. “Guess.”

“Well,” Daphne started. “I would say Brian but that would be a cold day in hell.”

Justin laughed as he went to get a pair of briefs. He put them on quickly and threw the towel that was around his waist on the floor. “Well, it’s a cold day in hell,” Justin pointed out as he grabbed his deodorant.

“Well, fuck me,” Daphne said.

“I told you that would never happen,” Justin joked.

Daphne rolled her eyes as Justin next grabbed a pair of socks. “Wow, I’m impressed.”

“Yeah,” Justin muttered.

“So,” Daphne said as she passed the pants to Justin. “Where are you guys going?”

“I don’t know,” Justin told her.

“Well you’re dressing to kill,” Daphne pointed out. “Let’s hope he does too.”

Justin nodded. Knowing Brian they would go to an expensive place, the brunet lived to impress.

“You look good,” Daphne told him.

“Just good?” Justin teased. “Maybe I should change.”

“Don’t be an ass,” Daphne replied. “I’m happy that you guys are finally doing this.”

Justin nodded as he went to his closet to get a pair of shoes.

“So, how did it happen?” Daphne asked smiling. “I want to know. Did he lose a bet?”

Justin laughed. “Nothing like that,” he told her as he walked to the bathroom.

Daphne got up and followed. “Then what happened?” she asked.

“Well,” Justin said as he fixed his hair. “He was here and we were watching a movie.”

“Right,” Daphne acknowledged.

“Well,” Justin said and grinned. “More like playing with our tonsils.”

“Justin,” Daphne complained. “Get to the point.”

“Right, so I got up and went to get us a beer,” Justin related. “So when I come back he smirks at me and asks me if I want to go on a date. I thought he was joking but I laughed and said yes anyway.”

“And then?” Daphne asked.

“That was it,” Justin told her.  
  
“So, that’s how you’re going out on a date?” Daphne asked.

“What did you expect?” Justin asked.

“I don’t know,” Daphne told him. “Something more romantic.”

Justin rolled his eyes as he came back to the bedroom to put some cologne on. “He wants to dine me and fuck me. He doesn’t want me puking all over the place. I can’t stand too much romantic shit and you know it.”

Daphne smirked. “I think he loves you.”

“I think you should go,” Justin told her knowing what was coming next.

“Do you love him?” Daphne asked.

Justin groaned. “Let’s not start, Daphne.”

“What?” Daphne asked smiling. “It’s just a question.”

Justin grabbed his cologne and splashed some on.

“Easy on that,” Daphne told him.

“How do I look?” Justin asked again.

Daphne frowned. “You already asked that,” she pointed out and then her eyes opened wide. “Oh my god. You’re so worried about this date!”

“I’m not,” Justin told her trying to sound indignantly about what she said.

Daphne laughed. “Like I don’t know you.”

“I think is time for you to go,” he told her firmly.

Daphne sighed. “I just came to…”

“Check on me?” Justin finished for her.

“That’s not it,” Daphne assured him. “I like spending time with you, ass. Although with your attitude I don’t know why. Maybe I’m a masochist and enjoy the pain.”

Justin knew better, his friend was checking on him. “Fine, I’ll torture you some other time. But I need to leave before I am late for this so called date.”

Daphne left quickly after that. Justin took his wallet, his coat and his keys and left the apartment. He got in his Jeep to drive to Brian’s loft. He called the man and Brian informed him that he was already at the restaurant. He told him where it was and Justin went there.

When Justin arrived Brian was at the bar with a drink in hand. The brunet was wearing all black. He looked exquisite and Justin wanted nothing but to fuck him right there. He put his hand on Brian’s hip and smiled. Then it happened, when Brian looked at him he felt like a naïve kid again. He was nervous and his hands started to sweat. He didn’t know what the fuck was happening to him.

“Hello, Sunshine,” Brian greeted him.

“Waited long?” Justin asked in a rough voice. He cleared his throat and tried to control his emotions.

Brian shook his head. “Let’s go sit down,” Brian said not sure what was happening to him. He knew that they were there on a date but it wasn’t really a date. It was all a big joke, he knew that. But he couldn’t help but feel uneasy about the whole thing.

Brian and Justin were seated and a waiter was there immediately. Brian asked for the same thing he was drinking and Justin asked for a Jack Daniels. The drinks were brought fairly quickly while they looked at the menu.

“I’ll have the steak, medium rare with the Greek salad,” Justin told him.

The waiter nodded as he jotted it down. Then he looked at Brian.

“I’ll have the sesame chicken,” Brian informed him. “And I’ll have a small side salad with that.”

The waiter took their orders and grabbed the menus. He left them quickly.

Justin grabbed his drink and took a sip. He sighed and tried to relax.

“Should you be drinking?” Brian asked.

“Are you going to fucking rat on me?” Justin asked.

Brian rolled his eyes.

“When was the last time you were on a date?” Justin asked him a bit curious.

“Wow, years,” Brian told him. “I ended up fucking the waiter.”

Justin looked at their waiter. “Well, I hope it looked nothing like ours.”

Brian chuckled. “How about you?”

“I think I was in college,” Justin told him. “It was a disaster. He wouldn’t stop talking and it was such a turn off.”

Brian smirked. “Too bad.”

“Don’t worry,” Justin told him smiling. “I found the way to shut him up.”

Brian smiled as well. “I don’t doubt it.”

“So, how are things?” Justin asked. “At work and shit.”

Brian shrugged. “I’m still the best.”

“I like a self aware man,” Justin replied.

They both laughed.

“How is your work?” Brian asked taking a sip of his drink.

Justin shrugged. “It’s okay. They’re demanding more paintings and I’m happy. They’re paying me very well for them.”

“That’s because you’re fucking great, Justin,” Brian informed him.

Justin looked at Brian and his smile shined with satisfaction and gratitude at his words. His leg moved forward and he started touching Brian’s leg.

“I’m not going to play footsie with you, Justin,” Brian warned him.

“No, I’m hoping you get horny and take me to the restroom to fuck me,” Justin said.

Brian licked his lips. “Go.”

Justin got up first and went to the men’s restroom. He waited for Brian who appeared a few seconds later. They were all over each other as they moved to one of the stalls. They were laughing from time to time when someone would come in and suddenly leave the place when they heard them. They came out when they were done and sat at their table, minutes later the food arrived.

“Is that any good?” Justin asked.

“You want to taste it?” Brian asked him.

Justin shrugged and Brian lifted his fork to give the blond a taste of his food. Justin opened his mouth and received the offering. He licked his lips seductively at Brian.

“Good?” Brian asked trying to control himself in the seat.

“Delicious,” Justin told him.

They kept flirting through dinner feeding each other and giving one another seductive stares. When it was all over Justin asked for dessert but Brian declined.

“Want a taste, Brian?” Justin asked.

Brian shook his head. “I’ll get fat.”

“I’ll help you burn those extra calories,” Justin assured him and waved a piece in front of Brian’s mouth. “Take it.”

Brian opened his mouth and did. “That’s very good.”

Justin nodded. “If you want to taste it again it will be from my own mouth.”

Brian squirmed again. He didn’t know how Justin did it but he was hard as a rock.

When Justin was done he looked at Brian with a big smile. “I liked dinner.”

“That’s good,” Brian told him.

“It was really good,” Justin said as he grabbed his drink. “And I have concluded that this is something we don’t have to do again.”

“Thank fucking god,” Brian said.

They looked at each other and laughed.

“Want to go to Babylon?” Justin asked.

“Sure,” Brian told him. “You can thank me for dinner there.”

Justin laughed. Brian called the waiter and paid for the food. When they left the restaurant they were holding hands. It was something they would do sometimes without noticing and if they did they wouldn’t think too much of it. But to anyone who passed at that moment they would appear to be two men deliriously in love.

***

_Feel me up inside you  
How you quiver and shake_

“So, is he better?” Michael asked.

Brian sighed. “I don’t know,” he answered sincerely. “He’s pretending like nothing ever happened. But at least he’s not getting drunk or using drugs.”

“How do you know that?” Michael asked.

Brian was tired of talking about Justin with Michael. He hadn’t even told his friend what had happened but rumors had started floating around. He didn’t have any idea on how the gossip had started. He wanted Michael to shut up about Justin. Justin was his problem to deal with and no one else’s. “Can we change the subject?”

“Sure,” Michael said very slowly.

“Great,” Brian said in a happy fake tone.

“When we’re done with the movies we could go to Woody’s and meet the guys,” Michael suggested.

“Whatever,” Brian told him as he grabbed a black, silk, sleeveless shirt from the closet. He didn’t know why the fuck he had agreed to go out with Michael in the first place. He felt like he was trapped in the past when he hung out with Michael.

There was a knock at the door.

“I’ll get it,” Michael announced.

Brian looked through the partly closed panels to see who it was. He smiled when he saw the blond. He was going to drag Justin along with them kicking and screaming if he had to as long as he didn’t have to spend all day with Michael alone.

“What the fuck do you want?” Michael asked.

“What the fuck is it to you?” Justin asked as he pushed Michael to the side and came inside the loft.

“Hey!” Michael yelled. “Brian and I are going out!”

Brian came out of the bedroom buttoning his shirt. Justin handed him a large, brown paper bag. Brian arched a brow and took it. He opened it and looked inside.

“What is it?” Michael asked.

“Get out, Mikey,” Brian said.

“What?!” Michael asked outraged.

“Get out!” Brian hissed.

“No way!” Michael protested. “You said we were going out.”

“Leave him,” Justin said as he took off his shirt and dropped it on the floor. “Let him watch. He might learn a few things.”

“You’re kicking me out to fuck him?” Michael asked heated.

Justin toed his shoes off, his eyes never leaving Brian.

Brian took a step forward and grabbed Michael by the arm. “I’ll call you tomorrow and we’ll go out then.”

“Brian!” Michael whined.

“Michael!” Brian said sternly. “There is something I need to do.”

Michael crossed his arms.

“Come on, Mikey, be a good boy and go home,” Justin said as he stood naked in front of Brian and Michael.

Michael’s mouth dropped open.

“I promise I will give him back to you in one piece,” Justin smirked before he walked to the bedroom.

“Close the door,” Brian said as he followed Justin.

Michael glared at the back of Brian’s head before he slid the door close making sure to throw it.

Brian didn’t care one bit. He dropped the bag on the bed and got naked in a flash.

“Someone is eager,” Justin teased.

Brian went to his toy chest and he pulled out a cock ring. He didn’t lose anytime in putting it on Justin. Then he kissed the blond roughly. His hands gripped Justin’s back to push their bodies closer.

“Are we going to get this started?” Justin asked pulling back.

Brian took out the whip from inside the bag and saw that there was a collar too. He smirked as he looked at the blond. He leaned forward and put it on Justin. His cock was rock hard and he hadn’t even done anything to the smaller man.

“I want you,” Justin told him.

Brian turned Justin face down and spanked him hard on his left butt cheek.

Justin grunted.

“I didn’t tell you to say a word,” Brian told him.

Justin bit his lower lip and stood still. He smiled happy that Brian knew what he was doing. He felt Brian’s hands roaming his body then it all stopped. Brian leaned down and bit Justin’s shoulder very hard.

“Fuck,” Justin moaned.

Brian went back to spanking Justin. This time it was more than once. Justin smirked as he got harder with each blow. Then it stopped and Brian’s tongue was soothing his red skin.

“So hot,” Brian murmured.

Justin stayed quiet enjoying everything silently. Brian started by caressing Justin’s body. Then he progressed to kissing Justin on his neck and then his back. He massaged Justin’s ass cheeks and licked Justin’s crack. Justin was in heaven.

Brian turned him around and did the same all over Justin’s body, kissing, nibbling and sucking the blond’s body. He reached for the condoms and the lube. He put some on his fingers and started to open the blond. He saw how much Justin was enjoying it.

“Fuck!!” Justin said not even aware that he had uttered a word; he was completely lost. He didn’t want the feeling to stop but it did.

“I said no talking,” Brian growled in his ear. He turned the blond around and started spanking him. When he stopped Justin’s ass felt warm to his touch.

Justin was so horny when Brian started opening him again. When he was loose enough Brian grabbed one of the condoms and opened it. He rolled it down on the handle of the whip.

Justin froze for a few seconds when he felt the hard object. Then he smirked and let Brian push it inside of him. “Like it?” Brian asked.

Justin gripped the sheets.

“I think so,” Brian muttered as he pushed the handle of the whip inside of Justin.

Justin shut his eyes and prayed to god that nothing escaped his lips. He didn’t want Brian to stop. Brian pushed the handle all the way in. Then he grabbed the rest of the whip and first wrapped it around Justin’s waist. Then he kept going on and went around Justin’s neck. The rest he grabbed in one of his hand and pulled at the chord tugging at the handle as well as leaving a burning sensation over Justin’s waist and neck.

Justin’s body shook and his eyes opened in shock. He tried to control his breathing but Brian did it again. He was going to be screaming pretty soon if the delicious torture continued. His face was buried in the bed while he bit the sheets as Brian kept pulling on the whip.

“This really gives a whole new meaning to being whipped,” Brian murmured. “You’re my little whore, aren’t you?”

Justin nodded but kept quiet.

“Good,” Brian drawled as he unwrap the whip from Justin’s body. He took hold of the handle and started fucking Justin’s hole with the handle.

Justin pushed his hips back loving the feeling. Then it stopped all together. “No,” he protested.

“What was that?” Brian asked.

Justin waited for the blows that his ass was going to receive but they never came. Instead Brian turned him around and bit him hard on one of his nipples. Justin would have screamed if he had not known any better. Any noise would have resulted in Brian biting him again. So while the pain went through him he pulled on Brian’s hair and kept his mouth shut.

“No talking whore,” Brian told him.

Justin breathed again when there was nothing but a tingling sensation on his nipple. He looked at Brian who was putting a condom on and he would have screamed with glee. Brian placed Justin’s legs up on his shoulders.

“Do you want daddy to fuck you?” Brian asked.

Justin nodded.

Brian slid inside the blond. He didn’t need to prepare the smaller man again. He started fucking very slowly knowing it would drive the blond crazy. And it did, he could see Justin fighting with himself not to say anything about it.

When Brian picked up the pace Justin wanted to die. He wanted to come so badly. He bit his lower lip and started pulling on his own hair. His walls gripped around Brain tightly wanting the man to cum. Maybe then Brian would let him cum.

Justin closed his eyes when he felt tears of desperation threatening to spill. His body tensed as he felt like he was drowning in a pool of hot water. Then the cock ring was gone and Brian’s hand was jerking him off. He came like never before.

Brian groaned and gripped one of Justin’s arms while his other hand gripped the duvet. He felt the blond squeezing him. He felt the lithe body trembling around him and it was delicious. He threw his head back and spilled his cum deep inside his blond.

When Justin opened his eyes Brian was kneeling on the bed tying up the condom. He touched his throat and the collar was gone. His body felt raw in a good way.

“This,” Brian said as he showed the collar to Justin. “Stays here from now on.”

Justin smiled happy to know that. Then he stayed where he was. His hair was soaked in sweat as well as his body. He didn’t think he would ever be able to get up and he could have cared less. He was thoroughly fucked.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked as he lay next to him.

“Fucking amazing,” Justin told him. “I feel you inside of me still. I’m fucking great.”

Brian smirked and then got serious. “I didn’t know your safe word.”

Justin shrugged. “It was okay. I didn’t need it.”

“What if you would have liked me to stop?” Brian asked.

“I would have said Mary Popping,” Justin told him.

Brian frowned. “Your safe word is Mary Popping?”

“No,” Justin told him smiling. “But that would have made you stop.”

Brian started laughing. “Yes, yes it would have.”

They laughed for a bit and then it stopped when Brian put his hands on Justin’s chest and started rubbing his nipples.

“I’m getting horny,” Justin informed him with his eyes closed.

“Good,” Brian told him.

Justin smirked and sat up. “I have something else for you.”

“Oh,” Brian commented. He watched as Justin got out of the bed and walked to get his jeans. The blond came back with them to the room and out of one of the pockets he got out a collar.

“I bought this one for you,” Justin told him.

Brian arched a brow and smirked.

Justin got on the bed and kissed him hard as he put it on Brian. “And unlike you I want to hear you scream Brian, every single dirty thing you want me to do to you.”

Brian knew it was going to a long and fun night.

***

_You had this look, that of an angel,  
It was such a bad disguise_

Justin knocked on the door and it was Ted who opened the door.

“Hey,” Ted told him. “You got here just in time.”

Justin nodded and went inside Debbie’s house. When he was inside everyone was sitting down at the table and he took off his coat slowly. He saw Brian walking towards him and he smiled. He hadn’t seen the brunet in almost two weeks. He had been in New York preparing for an art exhibition.

“What have you been up to, Sunshine?” Brian asked as he wrapped one arm around the blond. “Living with your wicked ways.”

“Shhh,” Justin said as he put a finger over his mouth. “I’ve been a very good boy.”

“We can change that,” Brian told him.

Justin smiled and they kissed.

“Brian stop trying to fuck Sunshine in my living room and let the boy eat,” Debbie called.

Justin chuckled and pulled Brian with him.

“And I thought I would never have to see you again,” Michael drawled.

“Why do you keep on bothering Justin, Michael?” Emmett asked.

“Because he is jealous of my hot body, this amazing face and the men I attract. That’s without mentioning my great butt and the fact that one of the men attracted to me is Brian,” Justin told Emmett. “Why else?”

“You’re nothing but an asshole,” Michael hissed.

“Guys,” Vic said sternly. “Let’s not start this.”

Justin smirked and ate silently listening to everyone else.

“So, Justin,” Lindsay said after a while. “How was your show?”

“A fucking success,” Justin told her.

Michael rolled his eyes. “So, Brian, are you going to Babylon?”

David sighed; he was tired of Michael clinging to Brian. He wanted his boyfriend to give that kind of attention to him.

“I want to hear more about Justin’s time in New York,” Brian told his friend.

Everyone was surprised.

“So, did you fuck any hot guys?” Brian asked.

“Oh yes,” Justin told him.

“We don’t want to hear about that,” Melanie quickly said.

Justin and Brian laughed.

“Maybe you could show something here,” Lindsay told him.

“You mean at the gallery where you work?” Justin asked. “Sure, why not?”

“You mean it?” Lindsay asked happily.

“Yeah,” Justin assured her.

Melanie smiled at Justin. She was happy that her wife was happy.

“And we all can go?” Emmett asked.

“Of course,” Justin said. “You’re my friends.”

“That’s great,” Ted told him.

“And you better be going too, Brian,” Debbie warned him.

Brian rolled his eyes. “I’ll see if I have time.”

“Yeah,” Michael retorted. “Brian has more important things to do.”

Brian ignored Michael’s comment.

Justin was eating dessert when he felt Brian’s hand on his thigh. He smiled and kept eating. Brian watched Justin’s face as he grabbed his crotch. The blond was as hard as he was and he wanted him.

“Come with me,” Brian whispered in Justin’s ear.

Justin waited a few seconds after Brian was gone and then followed him to the second room.

“Well,” Emmett muttered when they heard the noise.

At first through the thin walls everyone heard Brian and Justin laughing; then they heard the bed squeaking and after that a few moans. They all could not help but overhear the big finish. Once they were temporarily satisfied Brian and Justin returned to the family diner. They were laughing and acting like teenagers. By that time the gang was sitting in the living room.

“Had fun?” Ted asked.

“Yes,” Justin answered and chuckled.

“You’re an asshole!” Michael said.

Brian sighed.

“You can fuck him wherever the fuck you want but not in my fucking bed!” Michael hissed.

“That’s not your bed anymore,” Brian pointed out.

“It sounded like they had a lot of fun,” Vic said smiling.

Justin smirked at the man and winked.

“I think you guys need self restrains,” Melanie informed them.

“You’re just jealous because you don’t have a dick,” Justin told her.

“Justin,” Debbie chastised.

“You’re an idiot!” Michael yelled as he turned to scream at Justin.

“Is that so Mikey?” Justin asked. “Is it because I’m fucking in your bed or because I’m fucking in your bed with Brian?”

“You’re nothing,” Michael spat out.

Justin stepped in front of Michael. “I’m the guy that fucks Brian more than once and who gets fucked by him on a regularly basis. You Mikey are just his fucking best friend and he’s never going to fuck you so stop daydreaming about it.”

“Here we go,” Emmett said.

“Fuck you,” Michael said pushing Justin.

Justin pushed back and Michael almost fell back.

David got in the middle. “Stop it.”

Brian watched in silence. He didn’t want to get in the middle of it but he would if he had to.

“Stop fighting,” Debbie told them. “You’re not little kids.”  
  
“You’re so fucking pathetic, Michael,” Justin told him.

“Look,” David hissed as he grabbed Justin by the shirt. “You have no right to be saying those things to Michael. You’re so fucked up. You fucking shit!”

“I’m honest,” Justin spat out.

“The fuck you are,” David hissed. “You’re nothing but a rude little shit.”

“Well, this rude little shit!” Justin yelled as he pulled away from David’s grasp and continued, “Doesn’t go hiding in the baths to fuck everything that moves before going back to his boyfriend, like some people.”

David took a step back shocked. “Fuck you!”

“What?” Michael asked. “What is he talking about?”

David took a step to hit Justin and Brian got in the middle and pushed him back. Emmett smiled as he watched Brian defending the blond.

“You told him,” David accused as he looked at Brian.

“Oh my god,” Melanie muttered not wanting to believe what she was hearing. She always thought that David was a great guy.

“I didn’t say shit to him,” Brian spat out.

Michael couldn’t believe it. He quickly ran out of the house. David was hot on his heels.

“What a fucking night,” Brian drawled as he took out his cigarettes and offered one to Justin.

The blond shook his head and left too.

“Brian,” Debbie said when Brian was leaving for the door.

Brian turned around and arched a brow.

“Is it the truth? What he said about David?” Debbie asked.

Everyone who was in the living room kept quiet wanting to hear what Brian was going to say. They were surprised at everything that had happened and had been said.

Brian sighed. “I saw him once. And no, I didn’t tell Justin about it. Justin must have seen him too at one time or another.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Ted asked.

“Because it was none of my business,” Brian told them.

“Since when?” Debbie asked. “Michael is like a brother to you.”

“And you think he would have believed me?” Brian asked. “It would have made things worse.”

“He’s right,” Vic said.

“Then why did Justin say it?” Lindsay asked.

“Justin doesn’t act well under pressure,” Brian told them. “David pushed and he got what he deserved. Now I’m done with the questions.”

When Brian came outside Justin was pacing close to his Jeep. Brian walked up to him and his index finger traced Justin’s cheek. The younger man pushed the brunet’s hand away.

“He gets me so fucking pissed, Brian,” Justin said. “One of these days I’m going to fucking kill him.”

“Hope there are hot guys in prison,” Brian teased and grabbed Justin’s crotch.

“I’m not in the mood, Brian,” Justin told him.

“You don’t want to fuck?” Brian asked.

“If we fuck you’re not going to be able to sit for a week,” Justin warned him.

“Come on,” Brian said opening the door to the Jeep. He got in the passenger seat and smirked at Justin. “Use me and abuse me while you can.”

Justin went to the driver’s side and got in. He was going to show Brian that he wasn’t kidding.

Brian watched Justin’s face, just like an innocent boy and he knew that he was going to find nothing but a scheming man when they got home. Yet Brian couldn’t wait to see what Justin had in mind.

***

_I want to live life, always be true  
I want to live life and be good to you_

Brian had arrived to work early. He had gone to his office and told Cynthia that he wanted his morning coffee. Things were going great until he decided to go to the art department and on his way there he listened to a conversation that pissed him off. One of the women was talking shit about him. So he went back to his office and told Cynthia to call for said person.

“You wanted to see me, Mr. Kinney,” Pamela said.

“You’re fired,” Brian told her.

“Excuse me?” Pamela asked.

“You heard me,” Brian told her. “Pack your shit and leave.”

“You can’t fire me,” Pamela told him.

Brian got up from his chair. “I fucking hired you and I can fucking fire you.”

Pamela didn’t know what was going on. “But why?”

“I’m your boss,” Brian told her. “Was your boss. And I won’t stand for any disrespectful behavior from my employees.”

Pamela bit her lower lip wondering if the comments she had made about him had gotten around. “I...”

“Don’t bother,” Brian told her.

“Please, don’t do this,” Pamela told him.

“Too late,” Brian told her.

Cynthia has stayed out of the office but she could hear Brian’s voice rising. She knocked and went inside.

“But Mr. Kinney,” Pamela said. “I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t fucking care!” Brian told her.

“I have a kid to take care off,” Pamela told him giving him her best sympathetic look.

“Then you better get your ass out of here and in search of a new job!” Brian hissed.

“Brian,” Cynthia said, “here.” She gave him his coffee and then looked at Pamela. “Come on. I’ll give you your last check.”

Brian pinched the bridge of his nose and sat back down. Cynthia was back in a few minutes.

“What happened?” Cynthia asked.

“She was telling people that I won’t give men a job if they don’t fuck with me first,” Brian told her.

Cynthia opened her eyes wide. “Jesus.”

“I won’t have it Cynthia,” Brian told her.

“I understand Brian,” Cynthia assured him. “What a bitch. If I had known...”

“No, we don’t need blood spilled at the office,” Brian told her.

Cynthia smirked and went back to her work. For the rest of the day Brian was in a pissing mood. So around two she called Justin. She had learned about the blond by accident a while back when the blond had come drunk to Brian’s office, she was so grateful for that ever since. Justin assured her that he was going to be there in a few minutes to calm Mr. Kinney.

“What do you want?” Brian asked when someone knocked on the door. He was sure that it was Cynthia checking on him once again.

The door opened and Justin went inside. “Hello, stud.”

Brian smiled from ear to ear. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to steal you away,” Justin said. “Do you think it’s doable?”

Brian got up and went to kiss him. “You smell so fucking good.”

“Come on,” Justin said. “Grab whatever you need and let’s get the fuck out of here.”

Brian sighed. “I don’t know.”

Justin caressed Brian’s face. He could see how stressed the man was. He wanted Brian to relax a bit. So he would need to do some more coaxing. Justin started kissing Brian on the neck. He would purr and rubbed against the brunet.

“Okay,” Brian muttered. He pulled away from Justin and went to his desk. He called Cynthia and the woman came quickly. “I’m leaving for the day, Cynthia.”

“No problem,” Cynthia told him already having canceled the last two meetings that Brian had. They weren’t important and the people were okay with pushing them for a later day.

“I’m stealing him away,” Justin said smiling.

“Good,” Cynthia said. “He needs to go and relax and try to find the little manners he does have.”

Justin looked at Brian with an amused smile. “He’s not so bad.”

“You hear that,” Brian said as he smiled like a little kid. “I’m not that bad.”

Cynthia shook her head and walked out of the office. She was pretty sure that Brian was never going to change. He would be the same arrogant man she knew except when it came to Justin.

“How about we go to the loft and relax a bit and then go dancing,” Justin suggested.

Brian nodded and in record time they were at the loft. Brian went to take a shower and Justin ordered some food. When Brian came out of his long shower they ate and then Justin helped Brian relax some more for a few hours before they had to go out.

Brian and Justin took a shower. The brunet got dressed to go to Babylon and then they dropped by Justin’s apartment so the blond could change. When they arrived at Babylon the place was as always throbbing with the sound of music and the masses moving from side to side.

“Want a beer?” Justin asked.

Brian nodded and they went to the bar. “Ladies.”

Ted rolled his eyes. “Brian.”

“Hey, Justin,” Emmett said kissing the blond.

“Hello yourself,” Justin said smiling. He bought a beer for Brian and took a sip before he handed it over to the brunet.

“Brian,” Michael said smiling. He ignored Justin completely.

“So,” Justin said as he looked at Brian. “Want to dance?”

“Why not?” Brian asked as he threw his arm around Justin’s shoulder.

Emmett smiled as he watched them go. Michael was fuming.

“Brian has changed so much,” Ted said as they watch Brian and Justin dance.

“What do you mean?” Emmett asked.

“He acts more civil,” Ted told him.

“Does he act more civil with you?” Emmett asked.

Ted shook his head.

“Brian is never going to change,” Michael spat out before he moved towards Brian. He wanted to dance with the man and he would find a way.

“He’s right you know,” Emmett said. “Brian hasn’t changed a bit.”

“What are you talking about?” Ted asked. “He’s with Justin. They’re laughing all the time and Brian is always buying him a drink. Plus he’s always touching him somewhere or they’re kissing and groping each other. He’s Mr. Wonderful when he’s with Justin.”

“Exactly,” Emmett said. “Brian is still the same arrogant, self-absorbed, narcissistic asshole we have always known. He hasn’t changed one bit, Ted. The only difference is that now he has Justin. He never had that and the only person that gets Mr. Wonderful is Justin. We get stuck with Mr. Brian fucking Kinney. And that’s so totally fine with me because I know Brian loves us in his own way. And he’s always there for us when we need him.”

Ted thought about it. It was true. The only person that Brian was civil to was Justin, when they weren’t fighting of course. He smirked because even the mighty like Brian fucking Kinney had a weak side.

***

_All my talk of taking action  
These words were never truth_

Justin finished his painting and got up. He went to the living room where Brian was watching a movie and eating. He rolled his eyes as he heard Brian laughing.

“Come here, Jus,” Brian told him. “You have to see this part.”

“I have seen that part,” Justin told him. He had watched the movie with Brian twice but the brunet never got tired of watching it.

“Come on,” Brian told him. “It’s the part about the bear.”

Justin walked over to Brian and sat down. “This is a pretty good part,” Justin commented as he watched the screen and the big bear growl at the three friends.

“You can’t outrun a bear,” Brian repeated the lines.

Justin smirked as his attention was drawn to Brian.

“I don’t have to outrun him. I just have to outrun you,” Brian said before he started laughing.

Justin laughed too it was pretty hilarious. Then he got up again.

“Where are you going?” Brian asked.

“I have two more pieces to do before I can rest, Brian,” Justin told him. “The show is in one week.”

“I know,” Brian told him.

“You’re coming, right,” Justin said as he walked away.

“No,” Brian answered.

“I’m serious,” Justin told him. “Are you coming?”

“No,” Brian replied. “I’m not going.”

“Why the fuck not?” Justin asked. “You did once before. Oh, I see.”

Brian arched a brow and asked, “And what’s that?”

“You’re a fucking pussy, Brian,” Justin told him shaking his head. “Because they’re going to be there you won’t show up. Great plan, your status as an asshole would be intact. I’ll add that you’re someplace fucking and it will be perfect.”

“What the fuck is your problem?” Brian asked as he put his plate on the coffee table and got up. “I’m not your fucking boyfriend, Justin.”

“I’m asking you to go to the fucking show,” Justin told him. “I’m not getting on one knee and asking you to marry me.”

“Well, I’m not going,” Brian told him.

“I wanted you to be there,” Justin said. “You’re important to me.”

Brian sighed. “Sorry, some other time.”

“Don’t do me any favors,” Justin hissed.

Brian frowned and followed the blond. “What did I say? I can go some other time.”

“Don’t worry, Brian,” Justin said. “I sometimes forget how much of a coward you can be.”

“Fuck you!” Brian spat out.

“No, fuck you!” Justin hissed. “I’m tired of this shit. You either are going to be there for me or you won’t. It’s all about you, isn’t?”

“Oh, so now there are rules,” Brian said.

“Oh fuck it!” Justin shouted. “I’m not doing this anymore. I don’t even know what the fuck I’m doing with you!”

“Then don’t be with me!” Brian screamed.

“Fine!” Justin hissed as he walked to his bedroom. He came back holding a bunch of things that belong to Brian.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked.

“Here is your shit!” Justin hissed as he threw them on the floor. “Take them with you while you get the fuck out!”

Brian glared at him and left. He didn’t bother to take his thing. He wasn’t going to put up with Justin’s crazy attitude. He went home and started to do some work. When he was tired of that he took a shower and headed to Babylon.

“Hey Brian,” Michael said slowly.

“Hey,” Brian told him. “Are you here alone?”

“No,” Michael told him. “Emmett is dancing and Ted went to the bathroom.”

Brian nodded slowly as he asked for a beer.

“Are you okay?” Michael asked. “Where is he?”

Brian stayed quiet.

“Brian,” Michael said.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Brian replied. He drank his beer and then asked for another. When he was done with the second he went and disappeared into the backroom. He found two guys at some dark corner and he leaned back and called to them without muttering a word.

Brian caressed the face of the taller guy. “Suck me off.”

The guy got on his knees and followed instructions. Brian busied himself on kissing the second guy. He enjoyed them until he got tired of them. He went back to the bar where he found Michael and Ted talking. He ignored them for completely. He had more important things on his mind like Justin.

Brian asked for a stronger drink. He wanted to kill the blond for being so dramatic. So, he wasn’t going to the show, big fucking deal. It’s not like he had not been there for the blond. What else did Justin want from him, Brian asked himself.

“You look like you could use some company,” Emmett said to Brian.

“Fuck off,” Brian told him.

“Come on, Brian,” Emmett told him. “What happened with you and Justin?”

“Nothing happened,” Brian hissed.

“Last time I saw Justin he was getting wasted at Woody’s,” Emmett told him. “He hasn’t done that in a long time.”

“Good for him,” Brian whispered.

“Right,” Emmett said. “If you want to talk about it I’ll be around.”

Brian shook his head and downed his drink in seconds before he asked for another. He told the bartender to keep them coming and the man did.

“Brian,” Michael said a few hours later. “You’re totally wasted.”

“Fuck off,” Brian hissed. He rolled his eyes at the man. Michael would find any excuse to take him home and be next to him and he was tired of it.

“I’ll drive you home,” Michael told him.

“I said fuck off,” Brian told him. “I can drive myself home and I’m not going yet.”

Michael sighed and once again watched as Brian disappeared to the backroom. That’s all he had seen the brunet do since he got there; drink and fuck.

“Let’s go, Michael,” Ted told him.

“But Brian,” Michael protested.

“Brian is a big boy,” Ted said. “Come on.”

Michael gave up and went with Ted. He knew that Brian was in one of his moods and he wasn’t going to change his mind anytime soon.

When Brian was once again at the bar he decided he had some things to say to the blond. So he called him but Justin never picked up. From time to time he would call and still no one would answer. Around three in the morning Brian decided it was time to go home.

When he arrived at the loft he still felt like kicking Justin. He called Justin this time and left a message. “Hey,” Brian said. “It’s me. I just wanted to let you know that you’re a fucking asshole. You can fucking disappear. I don’t fucking give a fuck about it,” Brian informed him. “Oh and you can burn my shit because I’m going to burn yours! You insane, stupid, idiotic prick!”

Brian felt satisfied with himself. He sat on the sofa and threw his head back. He wanted to go to sleep but couldn’t. He went to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water. He was pacing around trying to come up with a solution. He was about to call Justin again when the door to the loft opened and Justin came in.

“I received your message,” Justin told him. “And you’re the insane stupid idiotic prick!”

“Fuck you!” Brian hissed.

“No, fuck you!” Justin shouted. “You’re drunk!”

“I’m not!” Brian disagreed.

“Then you’re a total shit!” Justin told him. “And yes, I’m burning your shit up.”

“Fine!” Brian screamed.

Justin glared at him but instead of leaving he walked to the bedroom. Brian went after him.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Brain asked him.

“I’m going to puke,” Justin informed him as he went to the bathroom.

“Get the fuck out, Justin!” Brian yelled angry.

Justin did the only thing he could. He took off one of his shoes and threw it at Brian. Brian managed to close the door in time before the offending object hit him. He started muttering to himself that Justin had lost his mind as he went to the living room to close the door.

Brian turned off the lights and set the alarm. He took off his clothes and crawled into bed when he felt his head about to explode and the alcohol in his blood really setting in. Things started to go around in circles. He heard the shower running and for a moment wondered what was going on. Then he remembered that Justin was there. He groaned but didn’t try to get up to stop Justin.

Justin came out a while later and got in the bed. “I’m so tired. I think lettuce was coming out of my nose.”

“That’s disgusting,” Brian muttered without opening his eyes.

“I know,” Justin said. “And odd, I didn’t eat lettuce.”

Brian opened his eyes. “What do you want? Stop talking, you’re giving me a headache.”

“Go puke like I did,” Justin told him. “You’ll feel better.”

“Shut the fuck up, Justin,” Brian hissed. “Just go to sleep.”

The loft was silent for a few minutes.

Justin sighed. “I’m not really going to burn your things.”

Brian opened his eyes slowly. “Okay, me neither.”

“And I’m not really going to stop fucking you,” Justin said as his eyes closed slowly. He yawned. “I didn’t really mean that.”

“I didn’t mean what I said on the phone,” Brian whispered. “I was just really pissed at you.”

Justin nodded. “If you don’t want to go to the show you don’t have to.”

“Thanks,” Brian told him.

“Okay,” Justin muttered as he moved closer to Brian. “Night, stupid prick.”

“Night, insane idiot,” Brian told him.

There was another long silence and suddenly Brian was talking.

“What?” Justin asked in a groggy voice unable to understand the brunet.

“I said...that you weren’t supposed to be drinking,” Brian repeated.

Justin cringed. “Shut up and go to sleep.”

Brian sighed before he fell asleep. By the time morning came they were wrapped around each other.


	13. The Rest Of The World Fades Away

_Inside you it’s  
Only what I crave_

Brian stirred as he felt a hot mouth engulf his cock. It was the best dream ever. His eyes opened the instant he shot his cum. He was breathing hard and trying to calm down.

“That’s what I call a healthy breakfast,” Justin growled in his ear.

Brian smirked and then frowned slowly when he felt his wet ass. “Justin?”

“Did I fuck you?” Justin asked and laughed. “No, I prepared you.”

Before Brian could say anything else the blond was pushing his legs open and entering him. He was really surprised and he knew that there would be a day when he was going to wake up and Justin was already going to be fucking him.

“So, good,” Justin told him.

Brian’s hips moved up trying to feel Justin’s cock deeper inside himself. His legs wrapped tightly around Justin’s narrow hips. Justin’s hand caressed Brian’s sweaty chest before he leaned down and started sucking on Brian’s nipples.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed as he fisted Justin’s hair. He loved when Justin played with his nipples; Justin’s tongue was a lethal weapon.

Justin’s hips started to move faster and faster. Brian always made him lose control. He buried his head in the crook of Brian’s neck. He inhaled deeply letting Brian’s smell fill his nostrils. It got him every time, they would be talking to each other or simply walking along side but if Justin’s got hit with Brian’s unique scent he got horny as hell.

“Mmm,” Brian growled as Justin pounded into him. He pulled on Justin’s hair and when the blond lifted his head the brunet kissed him. He loved sticking his tongue inside Justin. The taste made him shake with pleasure. Every time he wanted more and more.

“So close,” Justin grunted.

Brian nodded as he started fisting his cock. Justin pushed Brian’s hand away and took care of it himself. He loved to feel Brian’s cock pulsing in his hand when the brunet was cumming. Brian sucked on Justin’s lower lip and then nibbled at it.

Justin’s free hand grabbed Brian’s chestnut, sweaty hair. His hips stabbed Brian over and over again. Brian felt his balls contracting and he felt the shock waves undulate throughout his body. His hips arched impossibly and he shot his cum in between them.

“Yes,” Justin hissed as Brian’s walls gripped him. He kissed Brian hard as his body shook with his orgasm. When all their movements stopped Justin stayed there, happily feeling his and Brian’s aftershocks.

“Get off of me,” Brian told him.

Justin pulled out. He got rid of the condom.

“We need a shower,” Brian muttered as he got up.

Justin nodded and slapped Brian’s butt. “That’s mine.”

Brian narrowed his eyes. “Stop doing that.”

Justin chuckled. “I can do whatever the fuck I want.”

“But don’t hit my butt,” Brian growled.

Justin seemed to laugh harder. He loved touching Brian’s butt. So he did again and Brian pushed him away.

“Justin!” Brian’s voice echoed through the loft.

“What?” Justin asked innocently. “I like it.”

Brian rolled his eyes as he got in the shower. Justin followed him in. They started by washing each other but it turned into something else. It started innocently enough with a kiss. By the time Brian opened his eyes again he was pulling away from Justin to get some oxygen into his lungs.

“I want you,” Justin hissed and pushed the brunet against the wall. He rubbed his hard cock against Brian’s thigh as his mouth sucked on Brian’s nipple.

“Ah,” Brian’s head fell back.

Justin attacked the brunet’s neck and reached for Brian’s cock at the same time. He was on fire and he wanted to be inside of the taller man yet again. He turned Brian to face the wall. He grabbed a condom and in seconds he was back inside the warm tunnel. This time they took their time.

The blond moved back holding on to Brian’s hips. Brian opened his legs more his hands holding on to the wet tiles. His eyes closed as Justin started to fuck him languidly. His hands caressed Brian’s back. He pulled on Brian’s hairs one hand played with the taller man’s nipples.

“I want to hear you moan,” Justin told him.

Brian sighed and closed his eyes. He didn’t like to moan but he knew that Justin could make him. He didn’t even know how the blond did it.

Justin stopped his movements. “Brian.”

“Fuck me,” Brian growled.

Justin smirked and gripped Brian’s hips as he pushed inside. His hands stretched Brian’s ass cheeks apart.

“Justin!” Brian yelled his body rutted back against the man.

Justin left his hard cock deep in Brian as he rotated his hips.

“Of fuck!” Brian groaned when his prostate started receiving shock after shock.

“That’s what I like,” Justin told him in a husky voice.

Brian clawed at the tiles while he bit his lower lip. His hole contracted over Justin’s cock continuously. “Fuck me!”

“As you wish,” Justin told him as he pulled his cock almost all the way out and slammed back inside.

“Fuck!” Brian hissed. He felt his legs trembling.

Justin would pull out slowly and then slam into Brian. The brunet was shouting his pleasure and it was music to Justin’s ear. He put a hand on Brian’s hip and the other on the man’s shoulder. He bit Brian’s back and then licked the spot.

“Take your cock,” Justin said. “Now.”

Brian gasped and reached for his cock. He started to jerk off and in no time he was splashing his cum all over his hand and the wall.

“Yes,” Justin hissed as he found nirvana. He was resting against Brian’s back and moved back only when Brian started straightening.

“Are you taking Viagra?” Brian asked half joking.

“Hey,” Justin said as his eye looked at Brian’s hand. “I want to taste your cum.”

Brian smirked.

“In your mouth,” Justin told him.

Brian pushed Justin into the glass wall. He kissed the blond and then pushed one of his cum, coated fingers in the blond’s mouth. Justin sucked on the finger for a few seconds and then went back to kissing the brunet.

“Shower, we need to shower,” Brian said pulling back when he felt Justin getting hard.

Justin laughed and they showered. When they came out Justin dried off and walked to the kitchen. Brian followed him. Neither one of them were wearing clothes.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked yawning.

“I’m hungry,” Justin pointed out opening the fridge.

Brian rolled his eyes. Justin took out the milk and put it on the counter. Brian watched him as Justin prepared two bowls of cheerios. He was temped to ask when Justin had brought it to his loft but he gave up. He would find new things each day and he wasn’t surprised at all, not anymore.

“Here,” Justin said pushing Brian’s bowl to him.

“Thanks,” Brian said. He found that he had been hungry as well.

“What are you doing today?” Justin asked.

“I’m going back to bed,” Brian answered.

“How productive of you,” Justin teased.

Brian rolled his eyes.

“I met your ex-boss,” Justin said. “What an asshole.”

“You did?” Brian asked. “When?”

“At the art show,” he said. “Everyone asked about you. You should have gone, only if to see Vance’s face and gloat at him,” Justin told him. “He was telling me that he was there to buy some art for his company.”

Brian nodded while he chewed.

“I told him that I knew you,” Justin said. “He was like ‘oh, I didn’t know that’. He looked kind of pissed that you had met such a brilliant artist before he had.”

Brian chuckled; knowing Vance it was nothing but the truth. “Glad you know your worth.”

Justin smirked. “I can see why you started your own company,” the blond drawled.

“What did he buy?” Brian asked curious.

“He was trying to convince me to sell Chaos to him,” Justin laughed.

Brian rolled his eyes. “That’s my painting.”

“I know that,” Justin told him. After Justin had painted that particular piece he had shown it to Brian. The man fell in love with it instantly. Justin had given it to him even though Brian had fought against it saying that he could pay for it. “That’s why I didn’t sell it to him.”

Brian looked at Justin and smiled. He enjoyed when they had time for the two of them and they would talk with each other regarding the things that happened to them.

“What?” Justin asked.

“Nothing,” Brian muttered. “So, what are you going to do for the day?”

“Lay next to you,” Justin said. “Fuck you and kiss you. You see how productive I am.”

Brian laughed. “You’re insane.”

Justin stuck his tongue out at the man. They finished eating and then Justin did the dishes while Brian talked to him about a new campaign he was working on. When the kitchen was clean they went back to bed.

They were moving lazily in the bed. Justin was on his back having a cigarette and Brian was wrapping the duvet around himself each time more.

“We should be in Florida,” Brian said.

Justin arched a brow. “What?”

“Some place warm,” Brian told him.

Justin laughed. “We can still leave.”

“I’m too comfortable to start packing now,” Brian grunted.

Justin finished his cigarette in silence. Then he said, “Do you want me to warm you up?”

Brian arched a brow and smiled. “What do you have in mind?”

Justin pulled the duvet away from Brian.

“Hey, that wasn’t a good idea,” Brian protested.

Justin grabbed Brian’s cock. He leaned down and kissed Brian’s neck. “God, I can’t get enough of you.”

Brian sighed as his head rested on the pillow. Justin caressed Brian’s back with his other hand. He moved to grab a condom and put it close to them. He made sure he grabbed the lube too. Then instead of going back to where he was Justin laid behind Brian. His erection rubbed against Brian’s butt.

“Jus,” Brian warned.

“I want you so much,” Justin muttered.

“I don’t,” Brian grunted but his cock was responding to Justin’s caresses. His plans consisted of fucking Justin and not the other way around.

“Lying is bad,” Justin teased.

Brian smirked and his mouth suddenly snapped open. No sound came out as Justin’s fingers pushed inside of him.

“Does it hurt?” Justin asked.

“A bit,” Brian panted.

“I’ll be gentle,” Justin assured him as he stopped what he was doing to get a condom.

“No,” Brian grunted.

“Oh yes,” Justin told him as he assumed his position once he had donned the condom on.

“You’re insatiable,” Brian told him.

“Never enough,” Justin whispered to the brunet as he started pushing inside.

Brian wished he had something persuasive to argue and say to Justin. But he really didn’t have the energy or the will.

Justin stopped for a moment when he was imbedded in Brian. His hand caressed Brian’s shoulders and then kissed the skin there. His mouth moved up to kiss Brian’s neck and his hips started to move.

“God, Justin!” Brian hissed.

“Don’t you love it?” Justin asked.

Brian felt his cock hardening even more and he didn’t think it was possible. He knew he was going to die if Justin fucked him once again. Ever since he woke up that’s all Justin had done to him and the day was only starting. The blond was gentle until they reached the end. Both of them screamed for the other as they experienced their orgasm.

“Jus,” Brian said after a while.

“What?” Justin asked.

“Tomorrow is payback,” Brian told him.

Justin laughed. “I think I’m going to let you rest,” Justin whispered still deep inside the brunet.

Brian nodded absently as his eyes closed. His fingers interlaced with Justin and he didn’t regret losing all control to the blond. Tomorrow was another day he would show Justin then.

***

_Underneath your clothes_  
There’s an endless story  
There’s the man I chose  
There’s my territory 

“I think it’s time to go,” Justin said as he stood behind Brian.

Brian turned around. “And why is that?”

“I want you to tie me to the bed and fuck me senseless,” Justin said and laughed. Before Brian he never had such thoughts, but he had to admit that no one fucked like Brian did.

“I like what I’m hearing,” Brian told him.

“I want you to rim me,” Justin told him in a husky voice. “Then drive your hard cock inside of me.”

Brian grabbed his cock and rearranged himself in his pants. The blond could get him hard in mere seconds. “Okay,” he accepted. “Let’s get the fuck out of here.”

“Justin,” Richard said.

Brian turned around and glared. “What the fuck do you want?”

Richard ignored Brian’s question and looked at the blond. “I was looking for you.”

“You don’t say,” Justin told him. He was getting tired of the teen.

“Yes,” Richard told him. “This is my friend Anthony.”

Justin looked at the boy and smiled. Anthony was as tall as Brian with green eyes and dark skin. Justin wondered what they would look like naked and pressed together. The boy smiled at him and Justin’s cock jumped.

“Do you want to come with us?” Richard asked. “We’re going to my house.”

Brian wanted to kill the obnoxious little shit.

“I have plans already,” Justin told him.

“Come on,” Richard said smiling. “Anthony wants to learn a lot.”

Justin’s lips turned into a grin.

“Is he coming with us?” Anthony asked looking at Brian.

“He’s kind of old for us don’t you think?” Richard asked.

Justin laughed and put his hand on Richards face. “Why don’t you two go play around in the sand box. I’m staying with the old guy,” he winked at them and turned around.

“Justin?” Richard asked not knowing why the blond was turning him down.

Brian wrapped his arms around Justin’s waist and looked at Richard. “You boys got so much to learn.”

“I wouldn’t mind learning,” Anthony said taking a step forward. “I think you’re hot.”

“I think we could take him home,” Brian whispered in Justin’s ear.

The blond nodded and then Brian left to get the car. Justin walked over to Anthony and kissed him on the lips. “Are you sure you want to come home with us?”

Anthony nodded eagerly.

“What?” Richard asked in shock. “I thought we were going to my house A.”

“You can go to your house,” Justin told him. “Anthony is coming with us.”

Anthony was psyched by the whole thing. He had never had sex and now he was with Brian Kinney and his boyfriend Justin Taylor. After tonight Anthony could die a happy man.

“Get in,” Justin said when Brian drove the car towards them.

Anthony got in and then Justin. The teen kept quiet and listened to Brian and Justin talk. He wished he could keep up to the conversation but he was too scared. He was also happy and excited about what he was going to do.

“We’re here,” Brian said when they arrived.

Anthony took a deep breath and tried to pretend like he was okay. They got out of the car and went into the building. Anthony looked around the loft once they were inside.

“Do you want anything to drink?” Justin asked.

Anthony shook his head. “This place looks great,” Anthony said.

Justin smirked and walked over to him. “Why don’t you leave the small talk for later and take off your clothes now?”

Anthony took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay.”

Brian was already in the bedroom taking off his clothes. He was trying to decide what they were going to do first. At the top of his list was seeing the blond fucking Anthony. His cock twitched just thinking about it.

“Impressive,” Justin said as he ran his hands up and down the teen’s body. “You work out.”

“Yeah,” Anthony gasped out as Justin wrapped his fingers on his cock.

Justin smiled and wrapped an arm around the kid’s waist and pulled him close for a kiss. Anthony moaned and wrapped his arms around the blond. Brian watched the contrast on the ivory and ebony skin. He walked over to them and separated them.

“Now boys,” Brian said grinning. “Let’s get things started.”

“We already had,” Justin pointed out. “Come on.”

Anthony stared at Brian’s body and then at Justin. He didn’t know what to do. He followed Justin making sure that Brian was following them.

Justin sat at the edge of the bed. “Come here.”

Anthony stepped in front of the blond. Brian stood behind Anthony his hand gripping the man by the waist before he started to attack the dark skin boy. Justin grabbed Anthony’s hips and licked the left side. His tongue moved to the center where he buried his face in the teen’s pubic hairs.

“Oh god,” Anthony gasped as Justin’s mouth enveloped his dick. His knees trembled and he was grateful that Brian was holding him.

Justin deep-throated him and in no time he had Anthony coming into his mouth. He got up and kissed Brian before he moved to kiss Anthony.

“Having fun?” Brian whispered in Anthony’s ear.

Anthony’s body shook and he got hard again.

“Ah, youth,” Justin said and chuckled. “Get in the bed.”

Anthony obeyed the order. He lay with his back to the bed, trembling with the thought as to what would happen next. Justin went for the condom and lube. He handed Brian the lube. “Open him up.”

Brian didn’t lose anytime. He coated his fingers and pushed one inside the kid. Justin busied himself with kissing, nibbling, licking, and biting the kid’s chest. He moved up and kissed Anthony.

“Do you want me to fuck you?” Justin asked.

Brian by then had added a third finger into the tight hole. His mouth was wrecking havoc on Anthony’s sac.

“Yes,” Anthony hissed as he was drowned in pleasure.

Justin moved in between the teen’s legs. His cock jerked as he watched Brian’s fingers disappearing into the hole.

“Oh god!” Anthony moaned. He wanted more and more, it was so good.

Justin put the condom on and leaned over to kiss the boy. Brian pulled his fingers out of the virgin hole and grabbed Justin’s cock. Justin moaned and moved closer when he realized Brian’s intentions. The brunet placed Justin’s hard cock at Anthony’s entrance.

“Ah,” Anthony groaned.

“Don’t worry,” Brian said. “The pain will go away.”

Anthony gripped the sheets and shut his eyes closed. He was taking deep breaths and seriously doubting the pain would subside. After a while he felt himself relax and then Justin was pushing farther inside of him. They waited again until Anthony started feeling a hot current consuming him.

“Tight,” Justin grunted as he pulled back and sunk back inside.

Brian licked his lips and kneeled to the side of them. He grabbed his cock and started jerking off very slowly. He wanted to enjoy the sight before him. Justin looked at the brunet and gave him a lopped sided smile.

Brian moved closer to Justin and kissed him. His hand moved to Justin’s back. He could feel the muscles spasm as the blond fucked the teen.

“You’re so hot,” Brian drawled close to Justin’s ear.

Justin grabbed Brian’s cock. “I want to see him sucking you.”

Brian kissed Justin one more time before he moved closer to Anthony. He kissed the boy letting his tongue play with the teen. Anthony was in heaven as Justin fucked him and Brian kissed him. He wanted to open his eyes but he barely could.

Brian pulled back and kneeled to the side of Anthony’s head. “Move your head this way,” he muttered as his hand pulled Anthony’s face to the side. “Suck me.”

Anthony felt his cock jump with the thought. His hand moved up and took hold of Brian’s cock. He started by licking the pre cum off the shaft. Then he started sucking on Brian’s tip.

“Yeah,” Brian growled.

Justin watched for a while as the teen sucked on Brian. Then he leaned forward and stuck his tongue out, licking the base of Brian’s cock. Brian put his hand on the back on Justin’s neck. He pulled his cock out of Anthony’s mouth and only left the tip of his cock resting on the boy’s lips.

“Kiss him,” Brian said in a husky voice.

Justin kissed Anthony, the head on Brian’s cock in between their mouths. Brian threw his head back feeling the tongues swirling around the head of his cock. He was so close; he started jerking off himself again.

“Suck him,” Justin instructed to Anthony.

Brian went back to sinking his hard shaft inside the hot mouth. Justin never stopped moving his hips. He felt the boy’s hole squeezing him tight. He grabbed Anthony’s cock and started tugging at the teen’s cock.

“Mmmm,” Anthony moaned with his mouth wrapped around Brian’s shaft. He felt his body floating with pleasure. He wanted more and more as Justin started to go faster. It was so good; he never thought it could be so good. He loved how Justin’s cock felt inside of him. He felt whole. His body stiffened as he felt his orgasm start.

Justin pushed Brian back slightly. Brian pulled his cock out of Anthony’s mouth and watched the boy orgasm.

“Fuck,” Justin grunted as he followed the boy. His body fell on top of Anthony and they fought to regain their breath.

When Justin finally pulled out he moved over to Brian. He pushed Brian on his back and started sucking the man. It didn’t take long to taste Brian’s seed in his mouth. Then he moved to kiss the brunet.

“Wow,” Anthony whispered. “You guys are so amazing.”

Brian turned his head to look at him. He grinned as he looked at Anthony. Justin pulled away to take off the condom.

“Can I kiss you?” Anthony asked Brian.

Brian pulled him closer and started kissing him. Anthony moaned into the kiss. He slowly straddled Brian’s hips. Justin moved closer and started kissing the boy’s neck.

“Oh god,” Anthony gasped as he rutted against Brian. “Fuck me.”

Justin smiled and reached for the condoms. His hand grabbed two as he got in the bed. The room smelled of nothing but sex and sweat.

“I want you on your stomach,” Brian instructed the boy.

Anthony didn’t lose any time.

“Someone’s eager,” Justin said to no one in particular.

“Get on your knees,” Brian told him.

Anthony got on his hands and knees.

“No,” Brian said pulling Anthony’s shoulders towards the bed. “Just your knees.”

Justin grabbed a condom and stood behind Brian.

Brian made sure that Anthony was ready for him. Then he pushed inside the man. He moaned with satisfaction when Justin prepared him. He was being assaulted with pleasure from both sides. His ass and his cook were both very happy at that moment.

“Bri,” Justin grunted as he entered the brunet. His hands gripped Brian’s hips and he controlled the fuck.

Anthony gripped the sheets and moaned each time that Brian rubbed around his prostate. He didn’t think he was going to make it. He opened his eyes briefly only to have them roll back in pleasure. His mouth had opened, saliva dripping onto the sheets as he tried to control himself. He wanted to cum already. He loved the way Brian was fucking him.

“Mmm,” Brian growled when Justin started pounding into him. He gripped Anthony’s arms as he accelerated his pace.

Anthony grabbed his cock and started masturbating. His hips moved hard, back into Brian. “Yes,” he hissed as he spilled his cum, triggering Brian’s.

Justin kissed Brian’s back and licked him. He was starting to slow the pace when he felt Brian’s asshole grip him tightly and he lost it. He jabbed at the tightening hole and spilled his cum.

The three of them crashed down. Justin made sure he had a hold on Brian’s waist as he moved to the side. Brian pulled out of the boy as his body was pulled away by Justin. The three of them lay there breathing hard and fast, trying to calm down.

Justin nuzzled Brian’s neck. “That was so hot.”

Brian nodded and grunted when Justin pulled out of him. Justin got rid of his condom and then took Brian’s off.

“He’s dozing off,” Justin whispered.

Brian sat up in the bed and moved away. He went to get a drink in the living room.

“We killed him,” Justin said laughing as he watched Anthony sleeping.

“Kids are not made like they used to be,” Brian joked from the living room.

Justin got up from the bed as well. He stalked out of the room. He stretched his hands above his head. He took the drink that Brian had in his hand and took a sip before he handed it back to the brunet.

Brian sat down on the sofa. “It’s still early.”

Justin nodded and straddled the brunet. “We’ll have to entertain ourselves until he’s ready again.”

Brian smirked and put his drink away. His arms wrapped around Justin’s body. They started kissing slowly and barely moving. By the time that they separated, searching for air, they had been wildly pushing and pulling against each other. Brian produced a condom from the sofa and smirked at the blond.

“You’re so full of surprises,” Justin told him as he ripped the foil open with his mouth.

“I’m prepared,” Brian simply said.

Justin put the condom on the man. He tugged at Brian’s cock a few times as he kissed the taller man.

“Hurry up,” Brian whispered.

“This is all mine,” Justin muttered as he lowered himself on Brian’s cock.

“All yours,” Brian agreed as his hands gripped Justin’s hips.

Justin liked hearing that.

“Touch your nipples,” Brian commanded. “I want to see you.”

Justin started rubbing his nipples at first. Then he pinched them and hissed at the feeling. He opened his eyes a bit and watched Brian licking his lips. He smiled knowing that Brian liked what he was seeing.

“I want to see you play with your cock,” Brian ordered. “Do it.”

Justin gasped as his fingers rubbed against his piss hole. He brought the pre cum into Brian’s mouth.

“Good boy,” Brian growled as he held on to Justin’s hips while the blond rode him.

Anthony watched them from the bedroom as he fought sleep. As soon as he felt the bed dip a second time he opened his eyes. He sat on the bed and stared at the men in the living room. The kid had the biggest smile on his face. The hottest guys in the fucking world had fucked him and now he was watching them fuck. He couldn’t wait to go back to tell the rest of the guys.

***

_Ecstasy is all you need  
Living in the big machine_

Michael walked over to the bar where he found Justin. He frowned when he saw the man popping a pill into his mouth. “What are you doing?”

Justin arched a brow. “I would tell you but I don’t really feel like it.”

Michael frowned. “Was that an E?”

“What if it was?” Justin asked.

“You just came out of the hospital a few weeks ago,” Michael hissed. “You almost died.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Justin hissed. “Jesus Christ! You’re so fucking annoying. You’re not my fucking mother! And what the fuck do you care?”

“I don’t,” Michael assured him. “God, you’re such an asshole.”

Justin sighed.

“Hello, boys,” Brian drawled and bent down to kiss Justin’s temple.

“He’s doing drugs,” Michael hissed.

Brian looked at the blond and then at Michael. “Drop it.”

“Yeah, Mikey,” Justin spat out. “Drop it.”

“I’m just saying,” Michael said.

“It’s not your fucking problem,” Brian drawled.

“Let’s dance,” Justin said pulling Brian’s arm to make the brunet walk.

Brian went with the blond. He stayed serious not sure what he wanted to say the blond.

“What’s wrong?” Justin asked when he felt Brian’s stiff body dancing next to his. “You need to relax.”

“I can’t,” Brian murmured.

Justin sighed and knew exactly what was going on. He turned around and headed to the backroom. Brian was hot on his heels. He turned Justin around before the blond could reach his destination.

“I’m not a kid,” Justin told him.

“Then stop acting like one,” Brian hissed.

Justin laughed, “Who the fuck do you think you’re to judge me?”

Brian frowned, “A friend.”

Justin licked his lips and moved closer to Brian. “Brian, I know what I’m doing. Here,” he said and pulled out the bag he had in his pocket. “Want one?”

“Stop it,” Brian hissed as he grabbed the bag from Justin.

“Fuck you,” Justin jeered. “Give it back.”

“No,” Brian answered.

“I’ll find more,” Justin dared.

“I’m going to fucking carry you over my shoulder out of here if you keep this up,” Brian threatened him.

“You’re not the boss of me,” Justin hissed.

“What are you? Five!” Brian asked as he shook his head. “I mean it Justin, you can’t keep doing this. Next time you could really die.”

Justin walked away from Brian and into the backroom. Brian went back to the bar. He asked for a Jack Daniels and downed it in a heartbeat.

“What’s wrong, Brian?” Michael asked.

“Nothing,” Brian assured him.

Michael moved closer to the man. “You should leave him. He’s a fucking junkie.”

Brian glared at his friend. “Fuck you, Michael.”

“I’m just saying,” Michael drawled. “He’s not good for you.”

“And who is?” Brian asked.

“You deserve better than him,” Michael assured him.

“I don’t want better than him,” Brian replied.

Michael frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Brian sighed. “Nothing,” he hissed. He turned around and walked to the backroom. He watched as Justin got sucked and he went deeper into the dark space. He found a corner and didn’t have to wait long before someone was on his knees sucking him off.

By the time Brian came back Justin was at the bar drinking a beer with some guy. Brian walked towards them and saw Justin paying him some money and Justin smiling at what he received.

“Hey,” Justin said pushing the drugs into his pockets.

Brian stared at him. “I’m going home.”

“I’ll stay a bit longer,” Justin said. “Do you want me to go to the loft?”

Brian leaned forth. “What the fuck for Justin? You don’t need me,” the brunet told him and slammed the bag of Es that he had taken from the blond onto the bar. “If that is all you need then fuck you!” Brian hissed as he left Justin at the bar.

Justin bit his lower lip a bit surprised at Brian’s outburst. He swallowed and grabbed the drugs. He was about to go back to the throbbing masses but stopped himself. He took a deep breath and decided that going after Brian was a better idea.

He drove to Brian’s loft and reached the place as Brian was getting out of the Jeep. He let Brian go up and he stayed in the car. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say to the man. He got out of the car and walked slowly to the building.

“Justin?” Brian called from the bed when Justin opened the door to the loft.

“Yeah, it’s me,” Justin assured him and closed the door. When he went to the bedroom Brian was lying with his back to him. He frowned and stripped slowly. He got in the bed and wanted to touch Brian so much. “Brian?”

“What?” Brian asked, anger still flowing in his voice.

Brian frowned when he felt Justin’s arms enveloping him.

“I need you,” Justin whispered. “I need you more than anything.”

Brian turned around and hugged the blond. He wasn’t going to give up and he wasn’t going to let Justin do so either.

***

_Oh, how quiet, quiet the world can be  
When it’s just you and little me_

Brian and Justin were sitting in the dinner talking and laughing when Ted, Emmett and Michael came inside. They sat across from the blond and the brunet.

“Aren’t we all cozy,” Emmett said.

Brian narrowed his eyes. “Shut the fuck up.”

“Here we go,” Debbie said placing a salad in front of Brian and a burger with fries in front of Justin. She took out her pad and looked at her other boys. “What will it be?”

“I already ate,” Michael told her.

“I want some lemon bars,” Emmett said. “And a glass of milk.”

“Apple pie and coffee,” Ted told her.

“Where did you guys eat?” Debbie asked a bit curious.

“I was showing them my excellent culinary skills,” Emmett informed her.

“I’m stuffed,” Ted said. “It was good.”

Debbie smiled. “That’s great. I’ll be right back.

Justin laughed as Brian muttered something in his ear. Michael glared daggers as he watched them. He had to do something soon. He was tired of Brian and Justin’s sickening displays. Brian pulled Justin closer and started kissing the blond.

“Are you guys going to Babylon?” Emmett asked looking at Brian and Justin.

Ted was smiling amused. “Guys?”

Emmett started chuckling.

“Hey,” Michael said and kicked Brian under the table.

“What the fuck?” Brian asked as he looked at his friend. “What’s your problem?”

“I can help you with the list,” Justin joked.

Michael glared at Justin. Then he looked at Brian. “We’re trying to talk to you two!” Michael said raising his voice.

Justin looked up and his eyebrows arched. “What did you say?”

“Jesus Christ,” Emmett said and laughed. “You two are oblivious to the rest of the world.”

“What did you say?” Justin asked again wanting to know.

“We were wondering if you wanted to go to Babylon,” Ted informed them.

“We’re going to the baths,” Brian informed them.

“Some other time,” Justin told the guys before he started eating.

Brian followed suit. A few minutes later the guys’ orders arrived. They made small talk for a while.

“I’m full,” Justin said pushing his plate away.

“You’re going to get so fat someday,” Brian told him.

“Yeah right,” Justin told him and laughed. “I get great exercise.”

Brian snorted.

Emmett laughed at the guys banter. He was happy for Brian and Justin.

Then the small banter died and Michael put in his two cents. “So,” Michael drawled. “Now you’re following Brian like a sick puppy?”

Emmett rolled his eyes.

Justin glared at Brian. “I’m not you, Mikey.”

“Justin one, Michael zero,” Ted muttered.

“Shut up,” Emmett hushed Ted.

“You don’t know shit,” Michael hissed.

Justin got up. “I’m not going to stay hear listening to you,” he left as he grabbed his coat and scarf.

Brian sighed and pulled out his wallet to pay for their food.

“I guess I hit a soft spot,” Michael said triumphantly.

“I don’t see why,” Brian said as he dropped the money on the table. He picked his coat. “I’m the one tagging along. He invited me after all.”

Michael’s face scrunched up. Brian walked away.

“I guess Brian, was the one that hit the soft spot,” Ted whispered to Emmett.

Emmett elbowed his friend and tried not to smirk.

“He’s an idiot you know,” Justin said as he stood outside waiting for Brian.

“I really don’t want to talk about him,” Brian said before anything else was said.

Justin nodded and dropped the half smoked cigarette on the ground. “Let’s go. I want to shower before we go to the baths.”

Brian nodded as he threw his arm around the blond. “You have clothes at the loft.”

“I guess,” Justin murmured as he tried to get closer to Brian. He was really cold.

“Stop using me as your blanket,” Brian told him.

Justin chuckled. He was happy when they got in the car.

“I think its warm enough,” Brian complained after a while. “I don’t want to suffocate.”

“I’m still cold,” Justin protested.

They argued about the heater all the way to the loft. The two of them got out of the car and into the building very quickly.

“Home, sweet home,” Brian muttered when they were inside. He took off his coat while Justin closed the door.

“I hate winter,” Brian told him.

“I love it,” Justin said smiling as he took of his coat.

“What?” Brian asked.

“I like it because it forces you to stay home in bed with someone making your own heat,” Justin said and then wiggled his eyebrows at the brunet.

Brian laughed about at Justin’s remark. He tried to recall another time when he laughed as much but it was only with Justin. When he was with Michael, Brian usually laughed because he was high. Brian was inevitably making the jokes and laughing at them because Michael wouldn’t get half of them anyway.

“I’ll take a shower and then we can go,” Justin told him. “Are you joining me?”

“In a minute,” Brian told him when he saw the blinking light on his answering machine.

Justin nodded and walked away to the bathroom. “Don’t take too long.”

“Okay,” Brian said as he pressed the button to hear his messages. He only had three of them.

“Brian, this is Lindsay,” she said. “I need to talk to you about something. Call me?”

Brian erased the message when it was over. He would call Lindsay before they left the loft.

“Brian, this is Claire...”

Brian erased that one right away. He knew his sister would be asking for nothing else but more money.

Justin was taking off his clothes when he looked inside the shower. He frowned not seeing his soap and decided to go ask Brian where he had put it. There was no way that Brian had used it all up already.

“Mr. Kinney this is Doctor Johnson,” the man said. “I’m sorry to say this but we have found the source of your problem. We’re positive it’s cancer. I want you to come back to the clinic so we can start the procedure immediately. The faster we do this the better. We’ll have more possibilities to succeed.

Brian erased the messaged but the words kept playing on his head over and over again. He couldn’t move or have any coherent thoughts.

“Brian,” Justin said.

Brian turned around startled.

“What’s going on?” Justin asked behind Brian.

Brian thought that the blond was still in the bathroom. He turned around, his back towards the smaller man.

“Answer me,” Justin said but he had heard it. He had heard it all.

“I have cancer,” Brian told him.

Justin gasped at the harsh statement because now the words came from Brian’s mouth and not some answering machine. Now the words were out in the open in the cruel reality of light. He moved towards Brian and the brunet moved away. Justin followed him to the bedroom.

“Leave me alone, Justin,” Brian said as he sat on the bed.

“Are you going to die?” Justin asked. He didn’t know why but that was the first thing that popped into his head. It scared him shitless.

Brian looked at Justin with wide eyes. “What?”

Justin sat down too. “What kind of cancer is it?”

“I don’t know,” Brian told him.

“Where is it?” Justin asked.

“I don’t know,” Brian said getting desperate. “They took the x-rays of my whole body. It could be fucking anywhere.”

Justin licked his lips. “You’re going to go for treatment right.”

Brian didn’t know what to do. “I guess I have to,” he was truly scared.

Justin sat next to Brian thinking about what the brunet said. He didn’t want to ask any more questions because he was getting frustrating and very angry. All he thought about was the possibility of losing Brian and it terrified him. It couldn’t be true, Justin had finally found Brian. But fate was conspiring to take him away. Then he understood the anger that Brian had felt once when he almost took his own life and he felt so ashamed.

Brian wanted Justin to say something and yet he was grateful that the smaller man kept quiet. Slowly he felt Justin’s hand on top of his and he turned his hand and their fingers interlaced together. He stared at the side of Justin’s face not sure what was going to happen next.

As the silence reigned at the loft Brian and Justin held on to one another. Then suddenly the phone started ringing and after a while the cell phones too. Neither of them made a gesture to get up and get them. The rest of the world didn’t matter at that moment, it faded away and only the two of them remained.


	14. Here For Each Other

_You’re cynical and beautiful  
You always make a scene_

Justin went up the stairs of Brian’s loft. He had been calling the brunet wanting to know what the doctor had said to him. He had insisted on going to the appointment with Brian but the brunet had turned him down. He opened the door to the loft and found Brian behind some guy as they kneeled on the sofa.

Brian looked at Justin and started pounding faster into the man. Justin closed the door and walked over to them. He bent down and kissed the guy that Brian was fucking. The guy reached for Justin’s cock and then Brian started cursing at Justin.

“What?” Justin asked a bit confused.

“Why did you stop?” The trick asked.

“Fuck this,” Brian hissed as he pulled out of the man. “Get the fuck out!”

“He’s gone insane,” Justin whispered to the trick. “Your dick is going to fall off if you don’t cum.”

“Get the fuck out! The both of you,” Brian yelled before he stormed to the bathroom.

“God,” the trick hissed.

“Hold on,” Justin said as he grabbed the man’s hard dick and started jacking him off.

“Oh god yes!” The man hissed as he splashed his load in Justin’s hand. “Thanks.”

“Just because he’s gone nuts doesn’t mean your dick has to suffer,” Justin informed him.

The trick started to pick up his clothes. Justin went to clean his hands; he decided to go to the kitchen than to the bathroom where Brian was steaming with anger.

Justin smiled at the man that Brian had picked up, giving him a casual glance goodbye. The trick walked over to the blond and put a piece of paper in front of him before he left. Justin licked his lower lip and walked boldly to the bathroom. He knocked on the door and waited.

“Go the fuck away,” Brian instructed him.

Justin rolled his eyes and went to sit by the kitchen island. He picked up the piece of paper that the trick had left for him and smirked. He started to record the number on his cell phone when Brian came out.

“What the fuck are you still doing here?” Brian asked as he exited the bathroom. He found a pair of sweats to wear and started dressing himself in an attempt to ignore Justin.

“I wanted to see what crawled up your ass and died or is it the lack of something up your ass that is making you so irritating,” Justin drawled.

“Fuck you!” Brian hissed as he walked over to the blond.

Justin closed his cell phone when he was done and looked at Brian. “Are you okay?”

“What the fuck do you care?” Brian asked.

“Why the fuck are you trying to pick up a fight with me?” Justin asked. “Do you want me to fuck you?”

Brian glared at him. “Fuck you.”

“Right,” Justin said calmly. “This is getting old.”

“Get the fuck out of my loft, Justin,” Brian hissed. “You fucking shit! It’s not all about you!”

“Why are you throwing me out now?” Justin asked as he calmly continued sitting on the stool. “Are you going to keep cursing me out or are you going to answer me?”

“I was fucking that guy!” Brian hissed.

“Yes,” Justin drawled. “Why did you stop? It looked hot from where I was standing.”

Brian glared at him.

“What?” Justin asked arching a brow. He stared back at the brunet.

Brian crossed his arms.

“So, why are you trying to push me away?” Justin asked getting serious.

Brian didn’t answer afraid that the truth would scare off Justin. Brian had never needed anyone and for the first time felt he needed someone. But not just anyone, Brian needed the hot blond in front of him.

Justin licked his lips. “You’re an asshole.”

“Then leave,” Brian grunted.

“Fuck you,” Justin told him. “You don’t tell me what to do.”

“I can call the cops,” Brian pointed out.

“So,” Justin said ignoring Brian’s empty threats. “What did the doctor say?”

Brian stayed quiet.

Justin arched a brow. “So?”

“It’s no big deal,” Brian said trying to assure Justin as much as himself. “I’ll get some chemo and then they’ll take the tumor out.”

“Is it in your head?” Justin asked almost too afraid to hear the response.

“No,” Brian said slowly as he looked away from Justin.

“I’m not going to sit here all day guessing, Brian,” Justin assured him irritated with Brian’s behavior. He was only trying to help the stubborn brunet. “Now fucking tell me.”

Brian took a deep breath. “It’s testicular cancer.”

“Ouch,” Justin said. “Will they have to take your balls out?”

“Just one so far,” Brian informed him. He couldn’t stand to look at the blond. Brian was afraid he would see pity or worse rejection in the blond’s blue eyes.

“Do they really have to cut it off?” Justin asked quietly.

Brian’s lips formed a thin line and tilted his head to silently say ‘yes’.

“And then what?” Justin asked. “You’re going to use a fake ball?”

“Yes,” Brian gritted out almost in physical pain even though his body was still intact, still perfect. But for how much longer Brian thought to himself.

“How long will the treatment take?” Justin asked.

“The doctor said less than three weeks,” Brian answered. “They want to operate and remove the cancer as soon as possible before it has a chance to spread.”

Justin nodded. “Well, it’s not the end of the world,” he told Brian. “I’m sure they have done the surgical procedure before. And it’s great that they can use a prosthetic to simulate your testicle. You probably won’t even be able to tell there is a difference.”

Brian was angry at Justin’s last words. He was angry at the injustice of the diagnosis and the disease. He was angry at the world right now. He was Brian Kinney for fucks sake, stuff like this wasn’t supposed to happen to him. He was supposed to be young and beautiful forever. “Are you leaving my loft willingly now?” Brian asked in anger.

“What?” Justin asked. He stared at Brian and smiled. “You want me to leave.”

“Yes,” Brian said almost growling.

“You’re trying to push me away because you’re going to be missing a ball?” Justin asked and laughed. “You’re such a fucking asshole, babe. There is no problem with me, I can still fuck you.”

“I hate you!” Brian roared.

Justin was chuckling and stopped suddenly. “Hey, wait a minute! Are you calling me superficial?!”

Brian rolled his eyes. The only thing he wanted was for the blond to leave him alone. “Shut the fuck up.”

Justin licked his lips. “You’re weird.”

“Weird?” Brian asked confused.

“Yes weird, after all who in their right mind would want to get rid of a blond bombshell like me, Brian?” Justin asked. “Have you not seen my cock up close and personal?”

Brian’s mouth hung open too stunned at Justin’s audacity to speak. “You’re the one that’s weird,” he accused after a while.

“Of course I am,” Justin said as he walked to the fridge. “I hang out with you.”

And as hard as Brian tried not to, he smirked at Justin’s comment. He gave up knowing that Justin wasn’t going anywhere no matter how hard he tried to push him away.

“What the fuck is this?” Justin asked lifting the red ball from the kitchen counter. “Holy shit!”

“Put that down!” Brian yelled.

Justin started a new round of chuckles and for the first time so did Brian.

It was a start to bridging the gap between them and providing some comfort for them both. Things didn’t look too bad at that moment; they were actually facing this disease together. Soon Brian’s treatment would start and it wasn’t going to be a laughing matter. In fact Justin realized that Brian would’ve very little to laugh about and once the treatment started even smiles would be few and far between. Justin knew he had to hold on to the brunet and show him he wasn’t going anywhere.

***

_Hold on, hold on to yourself  
For this is going to hurt like hell_

Justin opened the door to the loft with a grocery bag in hand. He slid the door closed and looked at the dark loft. “Brian, are you here?”

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Brian asked weakly from the lounge chair.

“I brought some things,” Justin whispered as he walked to the kitchen. “Are you turning into a vampire now?”

Brian stayed silent and concentrated on breathing and not vomiting again. He felt like shit but that was how he had felt all week. It had been a week now that he had started the treatment and already he had four sessions of chemo. The treatment plan included trying to reduce the size of the tumor before attempting to surgically remove it. Brian’s oncologist and radiologist concluded it was his highest chance of stopping the cancer from spreading.

“Brian, are you awake?” Justin asked.

Brian tentatively opened his eyes. He felt like he was going to die right then and Brian almost welcomed it. Justin walked around the loft and turned on a few lights. He slowly made his way over to Brian and kissed him on the forehead. He pushed the brunet’s hair back.

“How are you doing?” Justin asked with tenderness.

Brian shrugged as he tried to sit up. Justin went to help him but Brian slapped the blond’s hands away.

“I don’t need help,” Brian told him as he sat up.

Justin licked his lips in concern but decided it was best to agree so he nodded. “I’m going to make something to eat.”

“I’m not hungry,” Brian snapped.

“But I am,” Justin simply said as he walked away.

“Don’t you dare pretend ignorance, like I don’t know what you’re really doing,” Brian told him.

“Making food you mean?” Justin asked feigning ignorance.

“Fuck you!” Brian hissed.

Justin laughed because he didn’t want Brian to see how worried he actually was for the brunet. So he continued his act and busied himself at the kitchen. He prepared some soup and a salad as well. He knew that the brunet had to eat. The brunet had fallen asleep in the chair and woke up some time later. He wasn’t really surprised with all of the brunet’s symptoms. Justin remembered the first time after chemotherapy Brian had immediately passed out once he reached the loft. Yet Justin’s fear at Brian’s precarious medical condition had him watching Brian constantly for signs of deterioration.

“What’s that awful smell?” Brian asked as he got off the chair.

Justin smirked and said, “It’s the poison I have added. I figured I should kill you so the whining would stop.”

“Not funny,” Brian hissed.

Justin’s cell started ringing. He answered and exchanged a few words on the phone then ended the call. “I have to go out for a little while.”

Brian walked to the bedroom upset but not willing to admit his feelings to Justin.

“Did you hear me?” Justin asked as he turned everything off. He served the brunet his food and went to take it to Brian. “Brian?”

Brian stayed unmoving in his bed with his eyes closed. He pretended to be sleeping yet again.

“You don’t fool anyone, you know,” Justin drawled.

Brian didn’t move or open his eyes. He heard the blond walking around and then Justin was gone. He opened his eyes when he heard the door to the loft closing. He looked to the side and saw a glass of orange juice and a bowl of soup. Brian grabbed the note that was in the night table.

_Eat up asshole or I’ll come back and force feed you. It won’t be pretty._

“Bitch,” Brian muttered crumbling the note.

After a few minutes he reached for the soup. He only ate half of it before he set it aside. He stayed in his bed tired and in pain from the brief attempt to feed himself. He wished Justin had stayed after all missing the blond’s company and attentiveness. After a while Brian fell asleep again with a hot young blue eyed blond invading his dreams. When he woke up his body once again protested any movement, he felt like he had only rested for a second.

Brian felt as if his entire body was hit by a rock. He had never felt so heavy and tired in his life. He sat up and walked to the bathroom slowly. He needed a bath. He took off his clothes slowly and was about to get in when he felt the pain hit him.

The tall man dropped to his knees due to a sharp throbbing pain. The room spun around in circles for him and he started sweating. He crawled to the toilet and started puking.

“Brian?” Justin called when he came back to the loft. He closed the door and heard Brian’s groans.

Justin walked quickly to the bathroom to see what the hell was going on. He found Brian puking his brain’s out.

“Fuck,” Brian groaned. He hoped it was over.

“Bri,” Justin whispered as he kneeled next to the man. “Jesus Christ.”

“Fuck,” Brian groaned when he started puking again. He thought that he was going to die.

Justin cringed as he held Brian by the waist. He could feel the man shaking. He knew the brunet was in pain and he wished he could do more.

“Oh god,” Brian hissed as one of his hands gripped the edge of the toilet seat. His other hand was clawing at the floor.

“Brian,” Justin gasped when he saw the blood that Brian had puke.

“Don’t touch me,” Brian spat out as he pulled away.

Justin let him go and watched as Brian crawled away weakly. He closed his eyes trying to get the image out of his brain. Unable to help Brian, Justin got up and flushed the toilet. Then he went to get something to clean and get the smell of blood out of the bathroom.

“I don’t need your fucking help,” Brian told him as he managed to sit down.

“Shut up,” Justin told him gravely. “I’m going to help you shower and if I hear a peep from you I’ll fucking tie you to the bed.”

Brian was about to protest but didn’t. He really needed to take a bath and he was sure he wasn’t going to be able to do it on his own. “Whatever.”

Justin took care of everything in a heartbeat before Brian could change his mind. He washed Brian’s body as a professional would have. Justin was so worried with what was happening that touching Brian’s body didn’t elicit the hard on he usually got next to Brian’s body. He was clinging to Brian with fear. He wanted the brunet to be okay soon.

“I can do this,” Brian said taking the towel away from Justin once the blond had helped him walk to the bed.

Justin glared at Brian before he went back to the bathroom to take a shower himself. When he was done he came back and got in bed with Brian. Brian sighed when he felt Justin’s arms around him.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked.

“I feel like shit,” Brian muttered as he tried to keep his eyes open.

Justin caressed Brian’s forehead. “You have a fever.”

Brian sighed.

“I’ll stay with you tonight,” Justin told him.

“You already do most nights anyway regardless of what I say,” Brian pointed out.

Justin grinned. “Now I’ll have a valid excuse.”

“You never really needed one,” Brian muttered as his eyes closed.

Justin smiled and kissed Brian’s neck. Then he held on and told himself that it all would be okay. The rest of the night he prayed as he never had while he watched over the man he was growing closer to everyday.

***

_And I don’t want the world to see me  
‘Cause I don’t think they will understand_

“Wait,” Brian said when Justin was about to get out of the car.

“What?” Justin asked.

“Let’s get out of here,” Brian told him.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Justin asked. He had brought Brian back from one of his treatments and he was going to make sure that Brian got his rest.

“I don’t want to be at the loft,” Brian explained. “Let’s go to your apartment.”

Justin licked his lips and closed the door. He started the car and drove them to his home. When they arrived he helped Brian get up. He knew he had to go to the loft to get Brian some clothes later.

“Jesus,” Brian said as he sat down on the sofa.

“Do you need anything?” Justin asked.

Brian shook his head.

“Do you want to stay here or do you want to go to the bed?” Justin asked. “I’m going to go to the loft and get some things. Do you want me to call Cynthia and tell her that you’re going to be out another week?”

“I can do it,” Brian insisted.

Justin bit his lower lip trying to calm his nerves and his sudden impulse to argue with Brian. “Fine. I’ll be back in a while.”

“Whatever,” Brian told him.

Justin went to the loft and grabbed some of his things. He grabbed Brian’s laptop with him because he knew that Brian would bitch and moan if he didn’t return with it. He already knew Brian well enough. When he came back Brian was asleep on the sofa.

The blond went to the bedroom and dropped the things there. Then he went to the closet and pulled out one of the duvets. He went to put it over the brunet when Brian woke up.

“Hey,” Justin whispered. “Go back to sleep.”

“My head hurts,” Brian muttered.

Justin nodded. “I’ll get you something but you have to eat first.”

Brian sighed as Justin walked away. He felt like he was an invalid.

Justin threw some sandwiches together and came back to where Brian was. He handed one to the brunet and arched a brow when the brunet didn’t take it. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m not hungry,” Brian said. “Just give me the pill.”

“No,” Justin told him. “You’re going to eat first.”

Brian shook his head.

“Brian,” Justin tried.

“I don’t want that!” Brian hissed.

“You have to fucking eat,” Justin yelled as well. He got up and put the plates on the coffee table.

Brian glared at the blond. “What the fuck did I come here for?”

“I don’t know why the fuck I brought you!” Justin shouted. “You’re such a fucking asshole.”

“That’s me,” Brian pointed out.

Justin narrowed his eyes and smirked. He took out his cell phone and started dialing.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked.

“I’m calling Debbie,” Justin told him. “She might know what to do.”

“No!” Brian shouted with all his might. “No.”

“I think it is a good idea,” Justin said but stopped dialing.

“I don’t want anyone to see me,” Brian told him. “I don’t want them to know.”

“They could help,” Justin pointed out as he turned his head up to look at the brunet.

“I don’t care,” Brian whispered.

“I’ll call them,” Justin told him.

“The fuck you will!” Brian yelled.

“Then you do what I fucking tell you!” Justin shouted.

“You think you can blackmail me?” Brian asked.

“I have nothing to lose,” Justin spat as he began to dial again.

“Stop,” Brian said pleading.

Justin arched a brow and slowly lowered the cell phone. “Brian, I’m only trying to help you. You know that you would be as annoying as I am right now if our positions were reversed and I was sick.”

“But you’re not,” Brian said dryly.

“Thank god,” Justin told him. “I would be as bitchy as you are right now.”

Brian looked at him and smirked. “Nice, Sunshine.”

“Are you going to eat?” Justin asked.

Brian pouted. “Fine, whatever as long as you shut up about it.”

Justin walked over to him and kissed him. “Thank you.”

“Don’t do that,” Brian said frowning. The doctor had told them that it wasn’t a good idea for Justin to have contact with his bodily fluids because of the pills. “Don’t kiss me.”

“I don’t care,” Justin told him.

“I’m radioactive,” Brian said. “I don’t want you getting sick.”

“I won’t,” Justin assured him. “It was just one kiss. Now let’s eat.”

Brian sat back down and grabbed the sandwich that Justin was giving him. He had a few bites and the blond was relieved that he won the small battle without any bloodshed. Also Justin was happy that Brian managed to eat something and hoped that later on the brunet didn’t get nauseous and vomit.

“I don’t want anymore,” Brian said.

“Okay,” Justin agreed, he didn’t want to push his luck with Brian.

“Are you going out?” Brian asked when Justin got up.

“I don’t know,” Justin told him. “Probably not.”

“Don’t let my presence here hamper your style,” Brian blurted out.

“You’re in a weakened state,” Justin pointed out. “You couldn’t hamper it when you were stronger than me. What makes you think you can now?”

Brian rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”

“Oh, shut up,” Justin drawled as he placed the plates in the kitchen. “I have work to do.”

Brian stayed quiet and watched as Justin went to get his pills.

“Here,” Justin told him holding a glass of water.

“Thank god,” Brian said.

Justin waited until Brian swallowed the pills before he left for his study.

“God,” Brian groaned and hoped the pills worked quickly. He grabbed the duvet that Justin had brought and wrapped it around himself.

Justin worked in his study for a few hours and when he came out Brian was sleeping. He went to the bed and grabbed his pillow and his duvet to come and be next to Brian. He pulled the love seat next to the long sofa where Brian was sleeping and went to sleep as well.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked.

Justin smirked and shrugged. “How are you feeling?”

“Okay,” Brian muttered. “Do you want to go to bed?”

Justin sat up on the sofa. “Do you need help?”

“Do you want me to answer that?” Brian asked a bit irritated.

Justin went to his room making sure that Brian was following.

“It’s kind of cold,” Brian pointed out as he walked slowly to the bedroom.

“Come one,” Justin said. “Get in bed and we’ll warm up.”

Brian did and Justin threw both duvets over them. Then he started rubbing Brian’s arms.

“Are you going to call the gang later on?” Brian asked.

“Are you still thinking about that?” Justin asked.

Brian sighed. “You don’t understand. They’re not like you.”

“Like me?” Justin asked.

“Yeah,” Brian told him. “It’s different with you.”

Justin felt happy to hear Brian’s statement. “I wasn’t going to call them,” he muttered. “Don’t worry about it.”

Brian closed his eyes surrendering to his exhausted state. He really didn’t think he could face everyone else.

“You’re such a scary-cat,” Justin told him smirking.

“What?” Brian asked.

“I know you’re scared,” Justin said. “And that’s okay, I guess but I think you’re wrong. I think that they would help you out.”

“You don’t know shit,” Brian hissed.

“Yet, I’m the one that’s here,” Justin said. “How about that?”

“Fuck you!” Brian hissed.

“The doctor doesn’t think that would be a good idea,” Justin told him.

“You fucking asked my doctor if we could fuck.” Brian asked his words full of anger.

“Yes, I did my dear,” Justin told him.

“Fuck you!” Brian shouted once again.

“Is that the only curse words you know?” Justin asked.

“Fuck you,” Brian whispered once again.

“Apparently,” Justin muttered as he wrapped his arms around Brian’s torso. “Night.”

Brian sighed. He stayed quiet but he couldn’t fall asleep. After a while he started caressing Justin’s hand. He brought it up to his mouth and kissed it. He was happy that the blond was there helping him. And it was true, he was scared. Justin was the only person he could stand to be with.

“Thanks,” Brian whispered.

Justin kept his eyes closed and his face expressionless, but he had heard the brunet. He was happy but he wasn’t going to make a big deal about it. If Brian only wanted him then that’s what the brunet would get.

***

_Stones taught me to fly_  
Love taught me to lie  
Life taught to die 

Justin parked the car in front of his apartment and got out. He went inside the building to retrieve his mail. He ran up the stairs and entered the apartment. “Brian?”

“What?” Brian asked sitting on the sofa.

Justin walked to the table and dropped his keys and correspondence. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing,” Brian replied as he smoked.

“Should you be smoking?” Justin asked when he saw Brian smoking weed.

Brian looked at the blond and shrugged.

“Weed has a lot of cancerous agents in it,” Justin said grabbing the joint away from Brian.

“The fuck it does,” Brian argued.

“It does,” Justin said taking a deep puff and walking away with it.

“Shit head,” Brian shouted at the blond.

“I heard that,” Justin called out.

“I meant for you to hear it,” Brian told him. “That’s why I was screaming it.”

Justin chuckled as he walked to the fridge. “Did you eat anything?”

Brian rolled his eyes and got up. He walked to the kitchen and leaned against the counter. “Where were you?”

“I went to see Daphne,” Justin told him. “She needed some advice.”

“On what?” Brian asked.

“Boyfriend material,” Justin said smirking. “Can you believe that? She asked me.”

Brian shook his head.

“What do you want?” Justin asked.

“Nothing,” Brian told him. “I’m not hungry and if I do eat I will probably end up sick in the bathroom an hour later.”

“You haven’t in a long time,” Justin pointed out. “There still some soup that I can heat up.”

Brian frowned.

“Come on,” Justin told him.

“Whatever,” Brian told him.

“Good boy,” Justin said as he gave Brian the weed back. “What did you do today?”

“I read a book,” Brian told him. “And I was...I looked at some of your paintings. I didn’t know if you would mind.”

Justin shook his head. “What did you think and be honest?”

“They’re good,” Brian said licking his lips before he took a long drag from the joint.

Justin took out the bowl of soup and put it on the counter. He looked at Brian and they ended up staring at each other.

“They...are you okay?” Brian asked. “I never thought this would affect you.”

“You don’t like them?” Justin asked evading the question.

“That’s not what I’m saying,” Brian replied. “They’re fucking amazing and they’re so full of emotion, almost like you left a piece of yourself. Frankly some of them scared me since they provoked such raw feelings.”

Justin pouted but still didn’t say anything.

“And another calmed me,” Brian whispered. He took another drag from the weed and stayed quiet.

There was a knock on the door.

“Are you waiting for someone?” Brian asked.

Justin groaned as he walked to the door. When he opened it Michael was there. “What do you want?”

“I wanted to ask you about something,” Michael told him.

Justin arched a brow.

“It’s about Brian,” Michael said.

“What about him?” Justin asked as he stayed at the door so Michael couldn’t come inside. He wasn’t going to risk the man seeing Brian there.

“Have you seen him?” Michael asked. He was worried out of his mind wondering where the brunet might be.

“No,” Justin lied to him. “I haven’t.”

“Cynthia said he was sick,” Michael told him.

“Is that so?” Justin asked.

“Yeah,” Michael said. “I mean. She didn’t actually say that. She just said that Brian had taken two weeks off so far and she didn’t know when he was coming back.”

“So?” Justin asked.

“Brian wouldn’t stop going to work if something wasn’t wrong,” Michael informed him. “I know him. I’m his best friend.”

“What do I care?” Justin asked. “You know I don’t give a damn about you. Besides there is nothing I can do.”

“God,” Michael hissed. “Don’t you care about Brian?”

“You’re his best friend,” Justin pointed out. “You should know where he’s at and what he’s doing. So stop bothering me.”

Michael hit the doorframe. “Jesus fuck! I think something might have happened to him. Do you not understand what I’m saying?”

“I’m sure he’s alright,” Justin told him. “Don’t worry about him.”

“He’s not answering my calls,” Michael told him.

“You can get so annoying sometimes, Mikey,” Justin told him. “Maybe he’s hiding from you.”

Brian smirked from where he was sitting. He was so grateful that Justin had lied to his best friend.

“Fuck you,” Michael hissed.

“Michael,” Justin said. “Look around. You’re insulting me in my home. I think you should leave now before I lose my patience”

Michael took two steps back. “You’re good for nothing. You don’t care about him and I’ll make sure to tell him.”

“He’s probably getting high and fucking everything that moves,” Justin told him. “You know him.”

Michael shook his head. “I’m leaving.”

“Bye, bye,” Justin then threw the door shut. He walked back to the kitchen. “He can get so annoying.”

Brian sighed. “I should call him and tell him that I’m okay.”

Justin nodded and watched the brunet walk away to make a call. He stayed in the kitchen preparing their food. When it was ready he served them and put everything on the table. He called Brian and the brunet appeared a few minutes later.

They ate and talked some more about Justin’s paintings even though Justin kept evading most of the questions. Brian didn’t know what to do.

“What did you tell Mikey?” Justin asked when they were done.

“That I was away,” Brian said. “He believed me.”

Justin nodded slowly and got up to clean the table. Brian took a deep breath as he got up. He frowned and slowly walked away from Justin and into the bathroom. He reached the toilet just in time.

“Brian,” Justin said a little while later when he found Brian sitting on the floor. “Fuck, are you okay?”

Brian shook his head.

“Let me help you up,” Justin told him.

“Don’t touch me,” Brian warned him.

“Bri,” Justin whispered.

“Just leave me alone,” Brian said.

Justin straightened out and could see that Brian was angry. He nodded and left the man alone. He was outside in the living room pacing. He was worried that Brian wasn’t going to be able to get up. He ran his hands through his hair and looked up when he heard Brian walking up to him.

“I’m going to bed,” Brian told him.

“Do you need a pill or something?” Justin asked.

“No,” Brian hissed.

Justin followed the brunet to the room. “Brian, I’m only trying to help you.”

“I know,” Brian said as he sat down on the bed. “It’s hard.”

Justin sat next to him.

“I feel like I’m dying some days,” Brian told him.

The room was silent for a few seconds.

Justin kissed Brian’s cheek. “You’re my life,” Justin whispered. “I feel like I’m dying some days as well. I let it out in my paintings. I get mad at this fucking life for doing this to us. And you, I get so mad at you when I try to help you and you won’t let me.”

Brian frowned and stared at Justin. He caressed the blond’s face and realized that Justin was as affected by his illness as if he had the cancer. Brian suddenly comprehended that Justin had suffered with him instead of standing on the sidelines. “I’ll be stronger tomorrow,” he muttered. “And I’ll try to accept your help.”

Justin kissed him on the temple and closed his eyes. His arms secured around the brunet.

***

_I’ve been drinking life  
while you been nauseous_

Justin felt like he was walking around on eggshells. He thought things would be better but he didn’t count on what came next. The day of the operation had came and went and now they were dealing with the results which among them where a very angry Brian.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked.

Brian pushed him away. “Fuck off!”

“We talked about this,” Justin said.

“This is different,” Brian yelled. “This is so fucking different!”

Justin sighed and left Brian alone. He walked out and went straight to the mini bar. He grabbed the bottle of scotch and drank from the bottle. He took a deep breath and shut his eyes. He wasn’t going to let Brian win. He had to be stronger than that. He put the bottle away and headed to his studio.

He tried to paint but he couldn’t. When he came back to the living room where Brian was sitting on the sofa frowning. Justin wanted to beat Brian up. The brunet should be grateful that he was okay or at least on his way to recovery but all that Brian could do was bitch and moan.

Brian got up and walked away. Justin knew that the man wasn’t okay so he went to ask him if he needed anything. He went to the bathroom where Brian had ended up. He looked at Brian as the brunet analyzed himself in the mirror.

“Look at me,” Brian whispered. He didn’t like what he saw. It wasn’t him, he would never be himself again or so he thought.

Justin frowned when he heard Brian’s voice. The man sounded broken.

“I look like I’m already dead,” Brian said.

“That’s because you haven’t eaten much these past few weeks, Bri,” Justin told him. “You’ll get better. You will look like your old self,” Justin wasn’t even going to lie. He never did and he wasn’t going to start now. Brian did look like he was sick but he had faith that it would change.

Brian’s eyes landed on Justin. “You look so beautiful.”

Justin swallowed.

“You’re perfect,” Brian informed him.

“So are you,” Justin told him.

“Not anymore,” Brian said as he groaned. “Fuck.”

Justin could see that Brian was in pain again. “I’ll get you your pills.”

“Fuck the pills!” Brian hissed.

Justin sighed and moved to get them anyway. When he came back Brian was puking.

“Don’t,” Brian said when Justin caressed his back. “Just leave me the fuck alone.”

“I’m trying to help,” Justin repeated for the umpteen times in god knew how many times since Brian had gotten sick.

“You want to help?” Brian asked as he slowly stood up. “Well, clean this up. It looks like a mess you can help with.”

“Fuck you,” Justin hissed. “You clean it up.”

“I thought you wanted to help,” Brian drawled. “And here I thought you were taking care of me.”

“I am,” Justin said. “I’m just making sure that you don’t pass out on the floor and die. And I don’t mind cleaning after you, but I won’t let you use me like that. I’m trying to be nice about this and you’re being a total asshole.”

Brian frowned. “I’m dying,” he blurted out.

Justin rolled his eyes. “So dramatic, Em would be very proud of your Oscar performance.”

“I could die,” Brian pointed out. “What if the cancer spread before they got to it? What then? What if they want to cut more of me?”

“Then die already and stop bitching,” Justin said as he started to walk away. “The mop is in the closet along with the bucket and everything else you will need,” he said before he walked away from the apartment.

Brian glared at the blond. He went to clean up the mess and when he was done he felt so tired. He went and sat down. He was so mad at Justin. He was mad with everything that was going on.

The door opened and Justin came in with a brown bag.

Brian arched a brow. “What’s that?”

“None of your business,” Justin told him.

Brian pouted.

Justin sat down to eat his food. He had bought something for Brian as well but he wasn’t telling the brunet. He was so angry with him. He only was trying to help and Brian could only scream at him.

The rest of the day they ignored each other. Justin took a shower first and then went to sleep. Then Brian did the same.

“Thank you,” Brian said after a while of lying next to the blond.

“For what?” Justin asked as he looked at Brian.

“For not treating me like a useless piece of shit,” Brian told him.

Justin turned towards the brunet and kissed him. “You’re not a useless piece of shit, Brian. You’re just sick for the moment but you will get better. Then you can go back to being the asshole you love to be. But right now you’re being extra annoying.”

“I’m not annoying,” Brian told him.

“You are,” Justin disagreed. “I know you’re mad, okay. I know that but I won’t let you take it out on me.”

Brian sighed. “Fine.”

“Good,” Justin said and closed his eyes.

The room was quiet but none of them were sleeping. Brian was moving in the bed not able to find a comfortable spot and Justin wondered what he could do. He was tired of fighting and he wanted to go to sleep.

“Shit,” Brian grumbled.

“What is it?” Justin asked half asleep.

“I’m missing a ball,” Brian told him. “What the fuck do you think? I feel weird and I can’t sleep.”

Justin opened his eyes slowly. He turned to look at the outline of the man. “What do you feel?”

“I feel bad, Justin,” Brian told him. “I’m missing my ball. Fuck, it’s not right.”

“It does not feel weird,” Justin told him as he closed his eyes again. He was so fucking tired and wanted to sleep for a while before he strangled the brunet. “You’re still sensitive since you got the operation only two days ago. You’re healing but that’s all.”

“That’s not all,” Brian told him.

Justin licked his lips. “You just think it feels weird because you know isn’t there. Now go to sleep.”

“I can’t sleep,” Brian pointed out.

Justin turned on his side and started caressing Brian stomach. “Come on now, it could be worse. You could be missing a finger and now, that is something that people would know about. They could see it right away. You have to stop worrying. No one knows and they will never have to know.”

“But I would know even if no one else did. Plus I would still feel weird,” Brian told him. “What the fuck do you know? You’re not missing a ball.”

“If I go cut one out will you shut up about you damn missing ball and go to sleep?” Justin asked.

Brian grunted.

After a while Justin opened his eyes. “Are you thinking about the answer?”

“Yes,” Brian replied.

Justin scoffed. “You’re fucking obsessed with this thing.”

Brian turned his head to look at Justin. “You don’t know what this is like.”

“Fine, I don’t,” Justin told him. “Could you go to sleep now?”

Brian kept quiet for a while and then asked, “Would you still be here if I was missing a finger or a hand or a leg?”

“Well, seeing how you’re missing half your brain, I’m going to go with yes,” Justin drawled.

“You little shit,” Brian told him smirking.

Justin smiled and moved closer to Brian. “Look, Brian, I know this is hard for you. I know that you must have a million questions that I won’t be able to answer and I can’t sympathize with you because it’s not happening to me. But I’m here for you and I care for you. And if I was going to leave you I would’ve done so in the beginning.”

Brian turned to look at Justin. “Okay.”

“Good,” Justin muttered. “Night, Bri.”

“Goodnight, Sunshine,” Brian whispered with a smile.

***

_A thousand other boys_  
Could never reach you  
How could I’ve been the one? 

Justin rubbed his shoulders as he sat on Daphne’s living room.

“You look a bit stressed,” Daphne said.

“I am,” Justin told her.

“I don’t want to leave,” Daphne told him. “I can stay.”

“Oh, please,” Justin told her. “You have always spent Christmas with your family.”

“I could stay,” Daphne suggested. “Really.”

Justin shook his head. “Go with them.”

“I could stay two more days and then go,” Daphne said.

“Daph,” Justin hissed. “Jesus, woman. It’s going to be okay. I’m just a tiny bit stressed.”

Daphne sat next to him. “How’s Brian?”

“He’s better,” Justin informed her.

“Are you going to be okay?” Daphne asked.

Justin swallowed and nodded. “I’m fine.”

“Right,” Daphne drawled.

“I’m just trying so hard to help him,” Justin told her as his eyes watered. “And I’m scared that the cancer is going to come back and fuck our lives again.”

Daphne rubbed her friend’s back. “That’s not going to happen.”

“You don’t know that,” Justin told her.

“Right,” Daphne muttered. “But, if it happens you will get through it like you have been doing.”

Justin nodded. “I guess. He’s been cooperating lately.”

“That’s good,” Daphne told him. “I’m sure that you guys will be there for each other no matter what.”

“But what if something happens to him and he can’t be there for me? What if he’s taken away from me?” Justin asked and got up quickly as she shook his head. “I don’t want you to answer that.”

“Jus,” Daphne sighed. “Don’t think about it so much. It’s good now so enjoy it.”

Justin nodded and looked at his watch. “I’m going back home. Brian is going to be home soon.”

“He didn’t want you to go with him?” Daphne asked. “I thought he had agreed.”

“Yeah,” Justin told her. “But he’s getting stronger now that they aren’t bombarding him with chemo.”

Daphne nodded slowly. “He’s a stubborn man.”

“I know,” Justin said smirking. “I’m going to go. You have fun.”

“I will,” Daphne assured him. “Say hi to him for me.”

Justin kissed her and hugged her before he left. By the time he got home Brian was already there.

“Hey,” Brian said. “I was waiting for you.”

“Yeah?” Justin asked as he closed the door.

“I’m going home tonight,” Brian said.

Justin licked his lips and nodded. “Cool.”

“I’m better,” Brian muttered as he looked at Justin.

Justin moved to stand in front of Brian. “What did the doctor say?”

“Today was the last time,” Brian drawled. “No more chemo.”

Justin smiled at that. “Good.”

“The doctor said I got a great Christmas present,” Brian drawled.

Justin frowned.

“Because I got the present of a clean bill of health,” Brian said.

“I think he’s right,” Justin said as he sat down.

Brian caressed Justin’s face. “You never left.”

Justin smiled and leaned closer to kiss the brunet. Brian kissed him briefly.

“I think you should go out for a while,” Brian suggested.

Justin smirked and shook his head. “I’m okay. I’ll go out later.”

Brian nodded slowly. They stayed quiet for a few seconds.

“Are you hungry?” Justin asked.

Brian smiled. “No.”

Justin laughed. “I like taking care of you.”

“I know,” Brian replied. “I didn’t mind it that much, I guess.”

Justin leaned back on the sofa.

“I didn’t think it would be like this,” Brian said.

“What do you mean?” Justin asked.

“I thought it would be easier,” Brian informed him. “I though I was going to be able to do it alone.”

Justin was glad that he had been there for Brian.

“I mean if you weren’t here I would’ve probably done it alone,” Brian said. “But it would’ve been a nightmare.”

Justin leaned closer to Brian. His arms wrapped around the taller man.

“And you made it tolerable,” Brian whispered.

Justin smiled and looked at Brian. “Good.”

“What is so special about you?” Brian asked as he caressed Justin’s face.

“I could ask you the same thing,” Justin muttered.

Brian kissed him briefly.

“Stop that,” Justin said smiling.

Brian stared at Justin and then looked away. “God.”

“What?” Justin asked.

“It’s nothing,” Brian assured him.

“What are you thinking about?” Justin asked.

Brian stayed quiet for a few second and then said, “I was terrified.” The brunet looked at the floor and then at the blond. “I thought that one of these days I was going to wake up and you weren’t going to be there; that you would get tired of my shit and leave.”

“I thought about it,” Justin said. “But you give great head and you’re so tight. Where am I going to get that?”

Brian laughed his hold tightening on Justin. “I know,” but that answer was for the words that Justin wasn’t saying and both of them knew it.

“You’re back to your old self,” Justin pointed out with a big smile. “Cocky as ever.”

“Just like you said I would be,” Brian whispered.

“I’m never wrong,” Justin said.

Brian grinned and the rest of the time they enjoyed holding on to one another. Brian could have gone home but he didn’t and Justin didn’t point it out.

 

<hr>Thanks to Rory who helped me out. She let me asked her so many questions and was so nice about it. Love you girl.


	15. Merry Christmas

_And on a rainy night two  
Lovers held each other tight_

Brian smiled as Justin painted. He loved to see the blond creating something. He took a sip from the beer that Justin had gotten him when he had arrived at the apartment.

“Are you still staring at me?” Justin asked and smiled.

Brian grinned and walked over to the blond. He put the beer on one of the tables that Justin had in his studio before he wrapped his arms around the smaller man.

“Mmm,” Justin purred and dropped his head back.

“You smell really good,” Brian muttered as he ran his hands over Justin’s naked stomach.

Justin turned around and kissed Brian. Their movements slow. The blond was a bit scared that Brian would pull away like he had so many times before.

“I want you,” Brian whispered.

Justin nodded and walked to the bedroom with Brian’s hand in his. When they reached the bedroom they stared at each other.

“This is awkward,” Brian muttered as he moved closer to Justin.

They interlaced their hands and smiled at each other. They kissed slowly and then climbed in to the bed. Brian wrapped his arms around the blond and they stayed intertwined. Justin started to unbutton Brian’s shirt with one hand.

“I’m going to my parent’s house on Friday,” Justin said. “Want to come?”

“What?” Brian asked as he sat up.

“Jesus!” Justin laughed and sat up as well. “Daphne is not here, she went on that trip with Andy. She always goes home to visit her family on Christmas. I always take her with me when I have a family dinner and around this time of year I never like to go home alone. If I show up alone I’ll be cross-examined by my family and get into an argument with my dad.”

Brian frowned.

“It’s no big deal,” Justin said.

“Nah,” Brian said. “I’ll go.”

“And you’re just a friend so don’t get your hopes up,” Justin informed him. “Just because you’re getting to meet the rents.”

“Fuck you!” Brian said as he threw a pillow towards the blond.

Justin laughed and lay back. Brian quickly got on top of him.

“I’m going to get you for that,” Brian promised.

Justin smiled widely wanting nothing else. He helped the brunet get the rest of his clothes off. Then they took it slowly as they touched and kissed. He wished with all of his heart that this time Brian wouldn’t pull away.

“I want you so much,” Brian grunted. “Take off your clothes.”

Justin didn’t waste anytime in following the request. He wanted Brian just as badly. Once naked he got on top of the brunet with one leg straddling each side. He rubbed his hard leaking cock against Brian’s.

“Want to ride me?” Brian asked caressing Justin’s hips.

Justin reached for a condom and opened it. He felt transported as if he was in some sort of dream. His actions were slow no matter how much he wanted to devour Brian. He wanted the old intensity back but he could take it one step at the time if he had to. He leaned forward to kiss the brunet when he finished putting the condom on Brian.

Brian turned them around. His chest was heaving as he tried to think of anything but Justin. His fingers pushed inside Justin’s hole. Justin tried to keep his eyes open but couldn’t. His arms wrapped around Brian’s shoulder as he loudly moaned his pleasure.

“God,” Brian groaned as he saw Justin’s unquenchable body moving under him. He pulled his fingers back and positioned his cock.

Justin opened his eyes with a gasp escaping his lips. He smiled at Brian and caressed the man’s face. “Come on, Bri. Take me,” he said in a husky voice.

Brian pushed inside as he closed his eyes. He groaned as he found himself imbedded in the younger man. Justin smiled and kissed Brian’s neck. The brunet started moving slowly relishing the feel of Justin’s silky, tight, hot tunnel.

“Yeah,” Justin moaned close to Brian’s ear. He knew it drove the man wild to hear him moan.

“Jus,” Brian whispered as he pushed inside the blond slowly. He could feel small explosions of electricity all over his body and their origin came from their connection. They had their arms wrapped around each other, very tightly.

Justin kissed Brian as he held on to the brunet. He felt like he was flying as Brian touched him. Each touch was light as if they were a fabric of time. They were moving slowly enjoying each second of their love making.

Brian moved one of his hands up to Justin’s face and caressed the blond’s cheek. He kissed Justin’s closed eyes and watched him. He was feeling peace and a sense of perfection as he moved in unison with the smaller man. He was in heaven or as close as any mortal man could go.

Justin groaned as his lover touched him. He gripped Brian’s body tighter to him. No one had touched him quite the way Brian was; no one had loved him like that before.

“Jus,” Brian gritted.

“Yes,” Justin hissed. “Brian.”

They were so close. Brian’s movements accelerated and in no time he was shooting deep inside the blond. Justin thrashed his head from side to side as he lost conscious thought and entered nirvana. He exploded in between them as if to create a visible bond that would bind them forever.

“Brian,” Justin said after a while when he had recovered his breathing. “I have good news for you.”

Brian lifted his head with one brow raised. “What?”

“You fuck as good as if you still had two balls,” Justin said smirking.

“Fuck you,” Brian said and pinched one of Justin’s nipples.

“Ah,” Justin screamed and laughed. He started wiggling as Brian started tickling him. “Stop, stop. I promise I won’t ever joke about that again!”

Brian by then had slipped out of the blond. He took off the condom and threw it away. Then he grabbed Justin and turned him around.

“What are you doing?” Justin asked.

“I’m going to spank you,” Brian told him.

“Mmm, kinky,” Justin said and waited. When it never happened he turned around. “What?”

“Well,” Brian said who was smiling. “I figure it would be a better punishment if I didn’t.”

“Brian,” Justin actually whined. “Spank me!”

Brian shook his head and laughed when Justin got on top of him.

“That’s not fair,” Justin pointed out. “It would have been fun.”

“Later,” Brian assured him and pulled Justin in for a kiss.

“Mmmm,” Justin purred contently. He stretched and yawned before he rolled off Brian. “You’re great.”

Brian closed his eyes and wrapped his left arm around Justin’s waist. He opened them when he heard rain hitting the window. He looked at it for a while and sighed. “It’s going to get cold now.”

“I know,” Justin said getting out of bed. “Let’s take a shower.”

Brian got up and went with the blond. They fooled around for a bit and Justin managed to get Brian to spank him. Brian emerged first from the bathroom and changed the covers. He got in bed and waited for the blond. “What the fuck were you doing there?”

“Cleaning my nails,” Justin told him. “I have paint all over them.”

Brian shook his head. Justin jumped in bed and kissed the man. It was still raining outside so Justin pulled the duvet over them knowing it would get colder later on.

They went to sleep holding on to each other, two lovers that slowly were becoming one.

***

_I have a smile stretched from ear to ear to see_  
You walking down the road, we meet at the lights,  
I stare for a while, the world around us disappears 

Emmett took a deep breath and tried to relax but Brian was driving him crazy. He looked around trying to find the blond bombshell that would keep Brian calm. “So, where is Justin?”

“I’m not his keeper,” Brian pointed out.

“Right,” Ted murmured. “I thought he would be here.”

Brian shrugged and asked for another beer. Michael kept quiet as he stood next to Emmett.

“So,” Emmett said frowning. “Have you talked with David?”

Michael glared at his friend. “I have nothing to say to him.”

Brian looked at Mikey and sighed. He wished he could do something but he preferred his friend to know the truth instead of being blind to it all.

“I think I’m going to go,” Brian announced after taking a few sips of his beer.

“But it’s early,” Michael protested.

“I’m leaving,” Brian said again.

“I think I should go too,” Ted pointed out putting his drink down. “Do you need a ride home, Em?”

“Okay,” Emmett agreed.

“Brian,” Michael quickly said. “Can you drop me home?”

“Whatever,” Brian answered as he started walking.

As they exited the place Emmett bumped into Brian thanks to someone that was coming in.

“Watch where you’re going,” Brian growled at Emmett.

“It wasn’t my fault,” Emmett protested.

Brian only glared at the tall man.

“You’re so irritating tonight,” Emmett said. “My god it’s so fucking cold,” he told them as they went outside. He rubbed his arms. “So what’s wrong, Brian?” he asked smirking since had he a strong inkling to what was wrong with the brunet.

“Fuck off,” Brian said very slowly as they walked to his car. He was about to get in when he saw Justin leaning against the light post. He threw the door shut and walked over to the blond.

“Hey,” Justin whispered when Brian reached him.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked as his hands grabbed Justin by the waist.

“Thinking,” Justin whispered.

“About what?” Brian asked.

Justin grinned and pulled Brian even closer. He caressed the brunet’s face and kissed him hard. Brian introduced his tongue inside the blond’s mouth. Justin moaned and wrapped his arms around Brian’s waist pulling him closer against loving the feel of Brian’s body flushed against his.

Brian pulled back and smiled. “Aren’t you cold?”

“A little,” Justin muttered. “I was going to call you. I got here a few minutes ago and I didn’t feel like going inside. I wanted a more private place to reunite.”

Brian bit his lower lip. “Is that so?”

“Oh yeah,” Justin assured him as he pushed his erection towards the brunet. “Feel that.”

Brian kissed the blond hard. He wanted to fuck Justin hard enough so that the blond would still be feeling him the next day.

“Bet he’s not irritating anymore,” Emmett said when they reached Brian and Justin.

Brian ignored the comment and continued kissing the irresistible blond.

“I thought we were leaving,” Michael protested.

Ted shook his head as Michael tried to talk to the guys. “I’m going to get in the car and warm it up.”

“Guys!” Michael screamed. “I’m talking here.”

“It’s hopeless,” Emmett said.

Justin pulled back and looked at them. “Hey, we can hear you. We just don’t fucking care. Let me ask you this. Have you ever seen two horny guys kissing each other? Because pretty soon we’re going to go and fuck each other until we drop.”

Brian snorted as he rested his head on Justin’s neck. Consumed with the blond’s scent he started licking the blond’s neck.

“Do you want me to put that in simpler terms or use little words?” Justin asked swallowing hard and trying to keep his cool. The truth was that Brian was making him shake all over. “Fuck off!”

“Are you going to let him talk to us like that, Brian?” Michael asked.

Brian looked back at the gang and then at Justin. “Mikey I think Justin said to fuck off and I have to say he comes with good idea. You should listen.” Justin smiled widely and Brian couldn’t resist kissing the blond again.

“Ted!” Emmett shouted as he turned around. “Michael needs a ride.”

Ted nodded signaling that he had already expected it. He walked to the car and got inside. As he adjusted his seatbelt he glanced at his review mirror. He looked back at Brian and Justin briefly and wished he could have that. Not that he was hoping for a hunk of a man to drop down from the sky. No, Ted would settle for someone to love who loved him back.

“Let’s go,” Emmett said to Michael.

“But,” Michael said still oblivious to reality.

“Come on,” Justin said pulling back from the kiss. He grabbed Brian’s hand and pulled him towards the ‘vette.

Michael glared at the blond.

“Forget them,” Emmett said and sighed. “Come on Michael.”

Once Justin was inside the car he noticed that Michael was walking to Ted’s car very slowly and glaring at the direction of the ‘vette. “I think he wants me dead.”

“That’s not true,” Brian said as he started the car.

“I think it is,” Justin contradicted.

“Forget him,” Brian told the blond.

“Forgotten,” Justin assured him. He closed his eyes and smiled when he felt Brian’s hand on his thigh. The world faded away for Justin. It was as if the colors meshed together and there was nothing else but him and Brian.

“We’re here,” Brian informed him.

Justin smiled as he got out of the ‘vette. He waited for Brian to appear by his side before he continued walking towards the building. It was cold and Brian was rubbing against him for body heat, which he didn’t mind.

“Sometimes he scares me,” Justin suddenly said, by that time they were both inside the loft.

“What?” Brian asked.

Brian walked to the kitchen to retrieve a couple of beers for them. “Who scares you?”

“Mikey,” Justin whispered. “It’s almost as if he’s so desperate to be with you that he would stop at nothing. I believe he would even kill someone only to be with you.”

Brian thought about it as he handed one of the bottles to the blond. “I think you’re nuts.”

“Why?” Justin asked. “People kill for less.”

“Let’s not talk about him,” Brian pointed out. “Let’s talk about us.”

“Would you kill for me?” Justin suddenly asked.

Brian chuckled. “Do you really want to know?”

“No,” Justin answered as he put his beer on the counter. “Make everything fade away, Brian.”

Brian put his bottle next to Justin’s. He caressed the younger man’s face and smiled. He kissed him roughly and started moving them to the bedroom. He wanted to get Justin in bed and make everything vanish for the blond.

Justin was quick to undress and get naked; he always did when Brian was going to fuck him. The brunet watched while he planned what he wanted to do to the blond. When Brian was naked he slowly moved on to the bed. With a forceful touch he guided the blond’s legs until they spread open for him. He licked his lips as he kneeled in between them.

“Touch me,” Justin instructed the brunet.

“Be quiet,” Brian said. “Don’t say anything.”

Justin closed his eyes, tried to relax and submit to Brian’s whims. All he wanted was to feel Brian all around him. Fortunately Justin didn’t have to wait much longer. Brian began his sexual torment with soft caresses of his thighs and then hips. The man played with his nipples making him gasp from the intensity of the sensual pleasure point.

Brian was having fun eliciting each moan from Justin’s already sweaty body. He had already mapped all of Justin’s weak spots. He had learned them and committed them to memory. He knew what to do to drive the blond wild; to drown him in pleasure.

“You’re driving me crazy,” Justin murmured.

Brian didn’t reply since he was too consumed with each tremor on Justin’s body. He was intoxicated with the desire to own the body beneath him. Brian continued traveling along Justin’s body in every direction possible. Then the kisses started and Justin couldn’t stop smiling. He was hard but not dying and what Brian was doing was perfect. Everything Brian did was flawless.

The brunet stopped and looked at the blond’s body. He licked his lips and turned the blond around in a quick motion. Justin didn’t have time to react.

“Hands and knees,” Brian growled.

Justin complied.

Brian took a condom and ripped it open with his mouth. He put it on and placed his dick at Justin’s hole. He pushed in fast all the way. Justin’s shoulders dropped to the bed while his mouth opened yet no sound came out. Brian twisted his fingers on the blond’s strands. He waited even though he didn’t want to.

“Fuck me,” Justin growled. “Brian, fuck me.”

Brian started moving his hips. He closed his eyes and threw his head back. He wondered then how come the familiar body never stopped being desirable. He always wanted Justin in his bed not matter what other guys paraded in front of him. He thought it might be love but found it absurd because he didn’t do love.

“Ah,” Justin moaned and gripped the sheets. He knew that every movement was carefully orchestrated because Brian knew his body so well. The touches and the places he selected; like kissing the back of his neck made Justin tremble or when Brian licked the side of his neck Justin would moan and feel electricity. If Brian bit his shoulder it was Brian trying not to cum too soon. All steps taken to drive Justin crazy and he loved it.

“Come here,” Brian said as he moved back on his haunches with Justin right along.

Justin gasped and threw his head back in bliss. He could feel Brian moving deeper into him. Brian, Brian, Brian, Brian, was the only thing in his head. The brunet had made him forget everything; made everything vanish for the moment. The brunet picked Justin’s hand and made the blond touch himself.

“Fuck me,” Justin growled. “Fuck yes!” he yelled as he climaxed. His cum flowed on his hand and on himself.

Brian closed his eyes and pounded into the blond. He gripped the slippery hips and gave it all he had. He came with a guttural yell. His body dropped to the side with Justin tightly in his embrace. He took a deep breath as he pulled out of the blond.

Justin opened his eyes and closed them. He continued watching Brian until Brian finally caught his breath and was able to talk to him.

“Tell me, is that what you had in mind?” Brian asked.

Justin laughed and moved closer to the brunet. “Yeah,” Justin whispered and then laughed.

Brian caressed Justin’s face but this time kissed him tenderly. He became a captive to his own desires as his body subconsciously pushed the blond back and got half on top of him. There was nothing outside of their room. The only thing that he could hear or see was the younger man and for once that was more than enough.

***

_Your mistakes I keep in the back of my mind  
So hard to let go but I’m coming ‘round_

When Justin reached his parents house he didn’t get out of the Jeep right away. He looked at Brian who was staring at him. “What?”

“Are you planning on eating in the car?” Brian asked. “Should I go tell them?”

“Don’t be an ass,” Justin told him as he got out. He grabbed a few bags from the back seat before he closed the door.

“What’s that?” Brian asked. “Do you need help?”

“No,” Justin told him shortly. He was already starting to freak out.

“So, what is it?” Brian asked walking with the blond to his parent’s house. He could tell that his little blond was a bit tense.

“Presents,” Justin said and rang the bell.

Brian looked up and then at the door. “What the fuck is that?”

“The bell,” Justin pointed out.

“Jesus, that’s creepy,” Brian informed him.

Justin laughed and nodded.

“So, why do you have presents with you?” Brian asked.

“It’s Christmas tomorrow,” Justin pointed out.

“So?” Brian asked.

“They always go away to visit with relatives that are close by,” Justin told him.

“Don’t you go with them?” Brian asked.

“My dad doesn’t want to take his gay son,” Justin pointed out.

“I see,” Brian said frowning a little bit.

Justin rang the bell a second time. “Jesus Christ I swear to god that they love listening to the sound.”

Brian shrugged and then frowned when the door opened. Craig Taylor was standing in front of them. The brunet momentarily wondered what the fuck he was thinking when he accepted to come with Justin.

“Come on in,” Craig said getting out of the way. “It’s good to see you, Justin.”

“Right,” Justin said sarcastically.

“Justin,” Jennifer said coming towards him. “Oh honey.”

Justin quickly put the presents on the floor so he could hug his mother. He kissed her on the cheek and then turned to Brian. “Mom, this is Brian.”

“I know,” Jennifer said. “It’s good to see you.”

Brian nodded and received a hug from the woman. Justin arched a brow at him as he took off his coat but didn’t say anything. He grabbed Brian’s coat and put them in the closet.

Craig watched them in silence. He closed the door before he moved to the kitchen.

“Dinner is ready. We were waiting for you,” Jennifer told them. “So just follow me.”

Justin took a deep breath and tried to calm his nerves. Brian grabbed him and kissed him hard.

“What was that for?” Justin asked.

“Mistletoe,” Brian whispered and then looked up where the mistletoe was hanging.

Justin laughed. “Okay.”

They walked to the dinning room where Jennifer placed a Cesar salad on the table. “Come on, sit down guys.”

Justin sat down and Brian next to him. Jennifer was across Justin and Craig was sitting at the head of the table. Justin wondered why his father was so quiet.

“It’s so good to have you here,” Jennifer said as she grabbed her napkin.

Brian wanted to puke at their fake pleasantries. He grabbed his napkin and put it on his lap. He found himself praying that things didn’t get fucked up. He knew how impulsive the blond could be and Craig Taylor was nothing but easy. Brian figured they both enjoyed pushing each others button and testing their limits.

“Do you want some wine, Brian?” Jennifer asked.

“That would be fine,” Brian answered.

“Why aren’t you saying anything?” Justin asked suddenly as he looked at his father.

Brian sighed. He hoped it would have taken longer than that.

“I’m just trying here,” Craig said.

Justin frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Justin,” Brian said putting his hand on the blond’s lap. “Could you talk about something else?”

Justin narrowed his eyes at the brunet before he stared at his empty plate.

Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. “Thanks Mrs. Taylor,” he said to Jennifer as he grabbed his wine.

“You can call me Jen,” Jennifer told him. “You’re part of the family.”

“What?” Justin said as he looked at his mother.

Craig turned to look at his wife like she was crazy but stayed quiet.

“Mom,” Justin protested.

“How long have you two being going out?” Jennifer asked.

“We’re not together Mom,” Justin told her. “Brian is a friend and stop saying those things or he will get his hopes up.”

Brian kicked Justin under the table and then narrowed his eyes. He twisted the napkin in his hands and imagined it was Justin’s neck. He looked at the blond who was smiling innocently at him and he grinned. That smile got him each time; he couldn’t stay angry for long.

Justin chuckled. “No really, mom, he’s just a friend.”

“I see,” Jennifer answered and left it there. As she looked at them she could swear that they shared a special bond; one that went farther than just friendship.

“I heard from your mother that you’ve been doing a few shows,” Craig said.

“He speaks,” Justin said in a teasing way.

“Justin,” Brian and Jennifer said at the same time.

Justin rolled his eyes and served himself. Everyone was waiting for him to say something.

“His paintings are really good,” Brian added as he grabbed the salad bowl that Justin almost threw at him.

“Yeah they are,” Jennifer agreed. “My boy is very talented.”

“I’m a man mother,” Justin protested.

Brian was amused. He was having fun after all; watching Justin interact with his mother was priceless.

“You should go to one of his gallery exhibitions,” Jennifer said. “I think there is one coming up soon.”

“I’m never telling you anything again,” Justin said to his mother. “Dad only wants to go so he can create another spectacle in front of everyone.”

“I won’t,” Craig said.

“Why not?” Justin asked. “You love doing that.”

Craig sighed and cleaned his mouth with the linen napkin. He grabbed his glass of wine and took a big gulp.

“Go if you want,” Justin said. “My inspiration for the show is based on a collection of naked man. I interviewed them, I chose the best from among the candidates then I drew them. They posed for me while naked and afterwards I fucked them.”

Jennifer sighed as she heard what Justin was saying.

“Don’t say those things at the table,” Craig told him. “I...it’s uncomfortable. I don’t want to hear it.”

“Craig,” Jennifer said sternly.

Justin let his fork drop on his plate. The loud noise echoed in the room. Justin got up quickly. “We’re leaving, Brian.”

“I didn’t say you guys had to leave,” Craig cleared his throat. “I’m trying, Justin. I really am.”

Justin shook his head and rushed out of the dinning room.

Brian got up to leave but didn’t have a chance to follow the blond.

“You stay right there,” Craig told him as he got up. “I’m going to talk to my son.”

Brian sat back down and looked at Jennifer who was serving herself another glass of wine. “Happens often?”

Jennifer nodded slowly. “More wine?”

“Please,” Brian whispered and handed his glass over to her.

“Stop,” Craig said once he reached the blond who was at the closet already taking out his coat. “You’re going to listen to me,” he said and grabbed the black coat.

“I don’t want to,” Justin told him.

“Stop acting like a child, Justin,” Craig said and sighed. “God, I’m sorry, okay. I didn’t mean to say that. You’re life is not uncomfortable or anything like that. I’m the one that’s uncomfortable around it.”

Justin stared at his father as if he was certifiably nuts.

“I still think that the best thing for you would be to get married to a girl and have a family,” Craig informed him.

Justin glared at the man. “Look, I don’t need this crap. I came here for mom. I don’t want to listen to a lecture yet again!”

“Justin, I love you!” Craig hissed.

Justin took a step back. “What?”

“You’re my son,” Craig sighed and gave his coat back to the blond. “I’m trying. I’m really trying and it’s not going to happen overnight. You have to give me some time.”

Justin didn’t know what to say. So he figured it was prudent to stay quiet. Instead of leaving he rushed to the stairs and to his old room. Craig sighed and walked back to the dinning room.

“I should go check on him,” Jennifer said.

“Let me,” Brian said getting up. There was no way in hell he was going to stay in there with Craig. The thought of the two of them alone was laughable.

“Okay,” Jennifer said. “Second door to the right.”

Brian nodded and left them in the dinning room. He bet they would have a lot to talk about. When he reached the stairs he followed Jennifer’s directions. He knocked on the door and waited.

“Mom, leave me alone,” Justin shouted.

Brian smirked and went inside. “Hey.”

Justin was sitting on the bed. He looked at Brian and arched a brow. “What do you want?”

Brian shrugged. “I’m just escaping the bad luck of being stuck all alone with your father.”

Justin nodded. “He’s an ass.”

Brian sat down next to the blond and looked around the room with a smile.

“He told me...” Justin said and stopped.

“What?” Brian asked as he turned to look at the blond. He grabbed Justin’s face and made the younger man look at him.

“He says that he loves me and that he’s going to try,” Justin said and pulled away from Brian brusquely.

Brian stayed quiet next to the blond.

“So,” Justin said after a while. “Don’t you have anything profound to say?”

“Want to fuck?” Brian asked.

Justin smirked. “We can fuck here.”

Brian moved closer and kissed the blond. Justin pulled back and laughed.

“Is that you when you were younger?” Brian asked nodding towards a picture of the blond.

“Well duh,” Justin said grabbing the framed photo. “I don’t have a twin brother. How old do you think I’m in this picture?”

“Twelve,” Brian muttered as he licked his lips and then stared at Justin. “You have always been hot.”

“You’re a pervert,” Justin pointed out. “I was twenty one there.”

“You always make me think of wicked things,” Brian said in a husky voice. “And I knew that.”

“No you didn’t,” Justin said getting on top of him as he threw the picture on the bed. “You see me at a younger age and you can’t help but to get hard,” he said as he grabbed Brian’s cock. “Ha! I’m right.”

“Again, I don’t see the problem of fucking here,” Brian said and brought Justin lips to his.

“My dad has a gun,” Justin told him when he pulled back out of air.

“That’s a big no,” Brian said and laughed.

Justin laughed and Brian started kissing him on the neck yet again. His hand reached for Justin’s cock.

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” Justin told him but only pulled Brian closer.

There was a knock on the door and they both jumped back scared by the sudden noise. They pulled away from each other quickly. Justin cleared his throat and told whoever was outside to come in.

“Hey,” Jennifer said.

Brian crossed his legs and leaned forward. He started thinking of Melanie and Lindsay kissing each other anything to will his erection down.

“Is everything okay?” Jennifer asked.

“Yes,” Justin said and rolled his lips inside his mouth.

“Can we continue dinner?” Jennifer asked.

Justin nodded and glared at Brian when he exited his room. Brian chuckled and got up to follow the blond. They continue dinner and this time without a hitch. The talked about Justin’s life and tried to stay away from the sex topic. Craig seemed pretty interested.

They talked a bit about Brian even when the brunet wasn’t so forth coming. Craig didn’t ask much of Brian but Jennifer had asked enough for the both of them. Justin was amused by the whole thing. After that they had dessert and talked for some more then Justin announced it was time to leave.

“It was good to see you two,” Jennifer said once the boys were ready to go.

Brian was putting on his coat. He nodded and didn’t say anything.

“You two have to come back soon,” Jennifer informed them.

“Mom,” Justin protested. “Don’t start that thing again. I told you that Brian was only a friend.

Brian pushed the blond with his shoulder and Justin smiled.

“Merry Christmas,” Brian said to Jennifer and Craig who were standing next to each other. He could tell that Jennifer was a good mother and Craig...was plain weird. He didn’t know what to think of the man.

Justin wrapped his arm around Brian’s waist. “Bye.”

They exited the place but not before Jennifer grabbed Justin’s hand. “You be good.”

“Okay,” Justin assured him.

“I’m not blind you know,” Jennifer said arching a brow and smiling.

Justin grinned and kissed his mom before he left the house.

***

_We got the afternoon_  
You got this room for two  
One thing I would love to do  
Discover me discovering you 

“Come on,” Justin said pulling Brian behind him.

“What the fuck are we doing here?” Brian asked looking around the expensive hotel. Justin had picked him up very early in the morning and he just followed. “Why are we here?” he asked again.

“You mean that as in general?” Justin asked looking very serious as he opened the door to their suite. “I could give you a lecture if you want. Why are we here?” Justin asked again smirking. “Mankind has been asking that very question for years.”

“Justin,” Brian hissed as he walked to the blond. “I’m not joking.”

“You interrupted my wonderful speech,” Justin said as he started unbuttoning his shirt. “I was going to answer one of the most important questions to the human species in this century.”

“No shit,” Brian said as he let the blond get naked. That was something he wasn’t going to fight about.

“I can abridge it all to one sentence,” Justin said like a little kid. “We’re here to fuck.”

Brian smirked. “You don’t say.”

Justin nodded as he bent down to take off his shoes and socks. When he straightened up Brian was very much interested in what he would do.

Brian’s cell phone started ringing. “Fuck,” he hissed when he saw it was Lindsay. “I have to take this. It could be about Gus.”

Justin nodded as he bent down to take all of his clothes and threw them on the lounge chair in their room. He hoped that it wasn’t anything important because he had plans for the brunet. He had been to the suite before leaving a present for Brian in the bedroom.

“Yeah,” Brian said to the woman.

“It’s me,” Lindsay told him. “Where are you?”

“Is none of your business,” Brian told her. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes,” Lindsay told him.

“Is Gus Okay?” Brian asked.

“Of course he’s okay. Why wouldn’t he be?” Lindsay asked.

“Good,” Brian said. “I just thought that something had happened because you were calling.”

Justin smiled wickedly when he realized that nothing bad was happening.

“What’s the...” he was about to ask but nothing else came out. He arched a brow when Justin got on his knees and started crawling towards him. “Is...” he cleared his throat. “Why are you calling me, again?”

“Brain,” Lindsay protested. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Totally fine,” Brian said slowly and looked down at the blond who was undoing his belt. “Could I call you later?”

“What are you doing?” Lindsay asked. “You said you would come for dinner.”

“Dinner?” Brian asked and closed his eyes as Justin took his cock out. He was so fucking hard and couldn’t comprehend why the hell he was still talking to the blonde.

Justin licked his lips as he looked up at Brian. He was trying to give him an innocent look as he took the brunet into his mouth.

“Yeah,” Brian babbled.

“What?” Lindsay asked.

“I’ll call you later,” Brian told her and hung up.

Justin smiled as he let the man’s dick slip farther into his mouth. He loved the taste of Brian. He moaned around the man’s cock and one of his hands started playing with Brian’s sac.

“Yes,” Brian said letting his cell drop to the floor and he grabbed Justin’s head with both hands. His hips started to move on their own. He was losing control quickly. He barely opened his eyes in time to see Justin looking up at him.

The blond pulled back and licked his lips. “Come on, Brian. Fuck my mouth, you know you want to,” the blond said and took back the man into his mouth again.

Brian moaned and did what the blond said. He loved every second of it. How Justin’s wet mouth wrapped perfectly around his member. It was pure bliss and then heaven when he reached his orgasm. He pulled back and shot his cum all over Justin’s face.

“You see,” Justin said laughing as he got up. “I’m getting to you. Soon enough you’ll be as kinky as me.”

Brian smirked. “You’re scary, Justin.”

“You like everything I do to you, Brian so stop bullshiting yourself,” the blond said as he started to undo Brian’s buttons. He caressed Brian’s chest and took the man’s shirt off.

“Hey,” Brian protested as the blond cleaned cum from his face with his shirt.

Justin threw the dress shirt on the floor and walked towards the bed. “Are you going to come fuck me or what?”

Brian smirked and removed his clothes quickly. He followed the blond into the bed. He looked at the object that Justin was holding in his hand. “What the fuck are you doing with that?” he asked when he realized what it was.

“It’s for you,” Justin told him.

“The fuck it is,” Brian hissed as he looked at the butt plug.

“Pretty please,” Justin said. “It’s Christmas Brian and Santa didn’t bring me any presents.”

“Me neither,” Brian informed him.

“I’m about to give you my ass, what’s better than that?” Justin asked looking indignantly.

Brian smirked. “I get that all the time.”

“Come on, Bri,” Justin said sweetly. “It will be fun.”

Brian sat on the bed next to Justin. “No.”

Justin moved forward and pushed Brian back. “It would be good, you’ll see.”

Brian lay back as Justin straddled him. The blond started by kissing his neck and then moved to his shoulders. He closed his eyes knowing that Justin was taking his time. He wasn’t going to let the blond stick the freaking butt plug in him no matter what. Justin scrapped his teeth over Brian’s left nipple and the man arched from the bed.

“You like that,” Justin pointed out.

Brian stayed quiet and watched the blond carefully or as much as he could, considering his precarious condition. When Justin reached his cock he lost control of the meticulous watch he had on the blond. Justin started playing with Brian’s perineum before he moved to the man’s hole.

“Justin,” Brian gasped even though he was trying to sound commanding.

Justin smirked and grabbed the sex toy that he had left lying next to them. He started licking Brian’s hole, teasing the brunet to no end.

“Okay come here,” Brian said opening his eyes.

Justin pushed the butt plug inside the brunet.

“Fuck,” Brian growled and arched his hips. “Fuck, he repeated.

Justin moved on top of the brunet and moved his hand under one of the pillows. He pulled out a condom and the lube. “Fuck me.”

Brian was going to turn them around but Justin didn’t let him.

“I’m going to ride you,” Justin assured him. He put the condom on the brunet and then some lube on Brian’s cock. He lifted up and started descending down slowly, not because it hurt but because he wanted to taunt the older man.

Brian grabbed Justin’s thighs in a fierce grip and pushed the blond down hard.

“Ah,” Justin grunted as his body jerked forward.

“You wanted to be naughty,” Brian said. “But two can play that game.”

Justin took a deep breath and opened his eyes. “Tell me you don’t like it, Brian. Move your hips up. Feel it inside of you as you fuck me.”

Brian had to admit that it felt great. He grabbed Justin’s hips and lifted him up a bit before he pulled the blond back down.

“Yes,” Justin said smiling sinfully. He licked his lips and started moving up and down Brian’s cock. He couldn’t get enough of the man. He started angling his hips so that Brian’s cock hit his prostate. “Yeah.”

Brian pinched the blond’s nipples and watched Justin’s face; nothing but pure ecstasy. He gripped Justin’s ass hard while his movements quickened.

Justin moved back a bit and his hand reached back. He put it on Brian’s thigh and let the hand make its way down and between Brian’s legs. He licked his lips as his fingers found the butt plug still trapped in Brian’s hole. The blond pushed it a bit further and at the base of it hit the switch that it had.

“Fuck,” Brian growled and his fingers gripped Justin’s body even tighter. Tomorrow Justin would have imprints on his body.

Justin held on to Brian as the man started buckling wildly. The brunet turned them around and hammered inside of Justin. He bit the blond neck and moaned and groaned as his cock tried to bury itself deeper into the man under him. He could feel the butt plug vibrating inside of him and it was doing nothing but driving him crazy. He needed to cum so badly.

“Brian,” Justin moaned as he shot his cum in between them. He was breathing with difficulty as he opened his eyes. He caressed Brian’s face and smiled when Brian made a guttural noise. He had never heard Brian moan and groan so much. He knew he had made a smart purchase.

“Turn it off,” Brian said as he pulled out of the blond and fell backwards onto the bed. “Jesus.”

“Why?” Justin asked smiling. “Why should I? You’re enjoying it.”

Brian shook his head. “It’s too much, fuck,” he hissed as his eyes rolled back.

Justin started licking Brian’s nipples.

“Please, Justin,” Brian begged.

“What am I going to substitute it with?” Justin asked.

Brian’s body was starting to shake. His walls constricted around the plug as it did wonders to his prostate. He loved how it had stimulated his orgasm. But now it was too much. He was going to surely pass out and Justin was probably going to let him.

“Look at you,” Justin said. “You’re hard again.”

Brian swallowed hard and started touching his nipples. Justin straddled the man and caressed Brian’s chest. He kissed the man and alternately he would bite the brunet as well. He couldn’t stop touching the taller man.

“Brian,” Justin whispered.

Brian opened his eyes.

“Touch yourself,” Justin said.

And Brian did and grunted he wanted to fuck Justin again. “Suck me,” he growled.

Justin shook his head. He could tell Brian was far gone. He could tell Brian to do anything and the brunet would do it. “Taste your pre cum, Brian.”

Brian lifted his fingers into his mouth and did. Justin was going wild watching the brunet. He bent down and kissed Brian violently.

Brian took a deep breath. “Justin, stop all this.”

“You love it, Brian,” Justin told him smiling as he reached for a condom. “If not you could have taken it out yourself.”

Brian groaned as the blond took out the plug. He opened his eyes and sighed contently.

Justin put the condom on himself and lifted Brian’s legs up. “So good,” he said as he pushed inside. Brian’s walls were gripping him over and over again.

“Mmm,” Brian hissed closing his eyes.

Justin didn’t move. He was letting the brunet adjust.

Brian opened his eyes and licked his lips. “Why did you bring me here?”

“Don’t you like it?” Justin asked. “It’s costing me a fortune.”

“All this for me?” Brian asked smirking.

“Yeah,” Justin said as he kissed Brian as his hips started to move. “I like to do things for you. Like I like fucking you.”

Brian could only nod too overwhelmed with mixed feelings. He wasn’t going to get into it and not right then when Justin was fucking him and making him feel so good.

They fucked again and when they were done they talked some more. They fucked and got fucked by one another as many times as possible.

The brunet didn’t think he could go again not that he was going to tell Justin. Justin lay satiated next to the brunet. “This is a great day.”

“You think,” Brian whispered as he moved closer to Justin.

“I need to rest a bit,” Justin said and kissed Brian. “Then your ass is mine.”

Brian laughed and closed his eyes as well.

“Merry Christmas, Brian,” Justin whispered.

Brian laughed and shook his head. When he woke up he was alone in the bed and the place was dark. “Justin?” he called out to the blond devil that had found a way into his life. “Where the fuck are you?” he asked and stopped to look at single red rose that was on top of the table in their suite.

The brunet looked back into the bedroom and then around almost believing that if he walked to the rose someone would pop out pointing and laughing. He took a deep breath and looked at the flower. He walked to it and picked it up. He arched a brow and then took the note next to it.

_Thought of buying something disgustingly expensive for you, bet you would have liked that. But then I thought it would be better to give you something that you can’t buy yourself and that no one has given you before._

Brian looked at his flower once again and smiled. He looked around the room once again thinking someone with a camera was going to capture him smiling like a fool over a simple rose. He put it back where he had found it and went to get showered and dressed. He didn’t need to take the flower. Justin had only wanted to make a gesture and Brian loved every bit of it.


	16. With A Tiny Pinch

_Let’s take a blast to the moon, baby,  
I’m sitting waiting around   
I’m craving you, yeah_  
  
“It’s been so fucking long since we did this,” Ted commented as he grabbed a slice of pizza from the box.  
  
“It was a good idea,” Michael told them.  
  
“I said I had plans,” Brian informed them. He had been waiting for Justin at the loft when the guys had appeared with two boxes of pizza and four six packs of beer. Then while he had managed to held Michael back Ted and Emmett snuck in laughing and getting instantly on Brian’s nerves. “That means fuck off,” the brunet said still trying to make them leave.  
  
“Come on, Brian,” Michael said. “It’s been a long time since we hang out together.”  
  
Brian rolled his eyes. “We can hang out later.”  
  
“Why?” Ted asked. “Are you going out or something?”  
  
Brian didn’t answer the man. He walked into his bedroom and sat on the bed. He refused to participate in their little group. As soon as Justin got there he was going to kick all of them out or leave everyone there and go out with the blond.  
  
“Do you want some of this?” Michael asked as he pulled out a baggie of weed. “It’s good stuff.”  
  
“Where did you get that?” Ted asked shocked.  
  
Brian rolled his eyes as he listened to them. He got up and went to the living room where Emmett was now sitting Indian style in front of his T.V. He was looking at the small movie collection that Brian possessed.  
  
“A friend,” Michael said as he pulled one joint from the bag he had containing three of them.  
  
“Don’t touch anything,” Brian hissed when he saw Emmett opening a case.   
  
“What?” Emmett asked. “My hands are clean.”  
  
“Jesus Christ,” Brian said rubbing his temples. He was so going to kill someone.  
  
“Come on, Bri,” Michael said. “This is going to be fun. You can do whatever you had planned later. I’m sure that if it had to do with a trick he won’t mind.”  
  
Just then the loft door opened and Justin came inside. He closed it and walked over to where Brian was. “What’s going on?” he asked. “When you invited me over I thought it was to fuck.”  
  
“It’s,” Brian snapped at the blond. He arched a brow as he stared at the younger man. He didn’t mean to snap at the fair man.  
  
“Mmmm,” Justin said ignoring Brian’s outburst. He turned around and smiled when he saw the pizza box. “Pizza!”  
  
Brian grabbed him by the arm and turned him to look at him. “What did you take?”  
  
“Me?” Justin asked innocently.   
  
“Jesus,” Brian said letting go of him. “Never mind.”  
  
Justin walked over to the pizza and lifted the top. He frowned and moved the box just to find out that both pizza’s where cheese. “No variety, how boring. Let’s order something.”  
  
“You can go eat whatever you want,” Michael said. “This is for us only. We’re hanging out and you weren’t invited. It’s friends only.”  
  
“He’s my friend,” Emmett piped out.   
  
Justin smiled as he looked at the man. He walked to him and sat down next to Emmett. “Put this one,” he said picking out the only movie in there that belonged to him. “It’s fun.”  
  
“The Yellow Submarine,” Emmett read. “Oh my god. I love this movie.”  
  
“Kill me now,” Brian said as he looked up. “Kill me now,” he repeated.  
  
Ted looked at Brian with a frowned but shrugged. He gave his attention to the video now playing on the T.V.  
  
“Here we go,” Michael said. He had been searching for a lighter. He put the joint in his mouth, lighted it up and sucked on it.  
  
“Yay,” Justin said getting up. “I want some of that.”  
  
“Fuck off,” Michael told him.  
  
“Brian,” Justin said like a little kid as he went over to the brunet. He wrapped his arms around the man and pouted. “Mikey, doesn’t want to share.”  
  
Brian looked at the blond. “Justin,” he said sternly.  
  
“Do you want to share?” Justin asked putting his hand on Brian’s crotch.  
  
“Here!” Michael yelled as he got up. He didn’t want Justin’s hands all over Brian.  
  
Brian intercepted the joint. “What did you take?”   
  
“It was some weed,” Justin told him as he tried to reach for the blunt. “Promise.”  
  
“Then you had enough,” Brian informed him.  
  
“You’re no fun,” Justin told him. “I’m going to order something.”  
  
Brian sat down and took a hit of the weed in his hands. He leaned back and threw his head back. Soon enough Emmett was sitting next to him reaching for the joint.   
  
“Do you want one, Ted?” Michael said. “I could light up another one.”  
  
Ted shook his head. “I don’t think so.”  
  
“Do you have money?” Justin asked as he covered the phone’s mouthpiece then turned around and kept on talking.  
  
“He’s so fucking annoying,” Michael said. “He only wants your money. I told you.”  
  
Emmett shook his head. “Justin is okay.”  
  
“Okay!” Justin yelled. “Food is on the way.”  
  
Brian licked his lips and tried to relax. He was angry with Michael and the guys for showing up. He was mad at Justin for taking drugs, because he knew that the blond had done more than smoked weed. But that didn’t keep him from eating Justin’s body who was currently sitting on the floor watching the movie.  
  
“He’s so eatable,” Emmett whispered to Brian and laughed.  
  
Brian glared at the man. He got up to go sit next to Justin but Michael pulled him by the arm.   
  
“Come on,” Michael told him. “This one is for you and me.”  
  
Brian took the joint and walked with Michael to the kitchen. The two of them smoked the whole thing. When they were done Michael wrapped his arms around Brian.   
  
“What are you doing?” Brian asked.  
  
“Tell me you like me better than him,” Michael said and smiled like a fool. “Say it.”  
  
“You’re high,” Brian pointed out and saw Justin taking off his shirt and walking to the bedroom. “Get a bottle of water and drink it.”  
  
“Do you want one?” Michael asked but didn’t let go of the brunet.  
  
“Sure,” Brian assured him pulling himself away from Michael’s arms. He went to the bedroom to find Justin taking a hit of his poppers. “What are you doing?” he asked and pulled the thing away from Justin’s hand.  
  
Justin laughed and let himself fall back in the bed. “I’m having fun.”  
  
“Jesus,” Brian muttered under his breath. He closed the panels to the bedroom so they could have privacy.  
  
“Come here and fuck me,” Justin said trying to reach for the brunet.  
  
“The guys are out there,” Brian pointed out.  
  
“When did you become such a prude?” Justin asked and laughed. He shook his head and turned face down. He was fighting to get his pants off him.  
  
Brian licked his lips and instead of leaving he just watched. He looked as Justin started stroking himself, lifting that delicious ass in the air; teasing him. He did the only logical thing at the moment. He moved behind Justin and got in the bed. He let his clothed erection rubbed against Justin’s ass.  
  
“Fuck me,” Justin gasped out. “Come on.”  
  
Brian licked Justin’s neck and helped the blond push the jeans all the way down. He pulled back and got rid of his shirt. Then he opened his jeans and pulled out his hard cock. Justin turned around and smiled. Brian felt his heart jumping all around his chest and his stomach tightened. God, the brunet thought, he couldn’t believe that Justin did that to him with a simple smile.  
  
“What are you waiting for?” Justin asked.  
  
Brian lowered himself to the floor and kneeled. He pulled Justin closer to the edge and kissed the man’s bellybutton. Then he licked it and Justin laughed with glee. The blond put his hands on Brian’s head and sighed contently.   
  
“Suck me,” Justin muttered.  
  
Brian felt Justin’s hard cock along his neck. He smiled and moved his head down to be able to suck Justin. The tip of the blond’s cock ran over his lips leaving his pre cum behind. Brian licked his lips and then took the younger man’s dick into his mouth.  
  
“Ah,” Justin groaned and arched his body. “Yes,” he hissed.  
  
Brian started caressing Justin’s balls and with the other hand held Justin’s hips in place. Then the blond stiffened all together. “What’s wrong?” Brian asked when he pulled away. “Do you want to stop this?”  
  
“No,” Justin hissed. “I want you to climb it.”  
  
Brian frowned and looked towards the living room.  
  
“They’re not going to come in here,” Justin assured him. “Come on. It’s just fucking, Bri. Newsflash this place is not soundproof. I think they like hearing us,” Justin told him. “They must have heard me groaning while you showed me your talent,” he said and wiggled his brows.  
  
Brian grinned and got up. He took of his pants and then straddled the blond. They started kissing and touching everywhere. Then Justin moved back to the middle of the bed pulling the brunet with him. He sighed when Brian was finally on top of him rubbing their cocks together.  
  
“Grab a condom,” Justin muttered and Brian did.  
  
Brian moved forward to kiss the blond while he put the condom on Justin. He knew he must be crazy doing that with the guys in the other room but he simply didn’t care. He groaned when Justin was finally pushing inside of him.  
  
“You feel good,” Justin grunted as he threw his head back.  
  
“Fuck,” Brian shouted when the tip of the hard cock inside of him rubbed against his sweet spot.   
  
“We can hear you moaning!” Emmett screamed from the living room. He could barely hear them but he wasn’t stupid. He knew that Brian and Justin were fucking in the bedroom.  
  
“Then fucking leave or enjoy it,” Justin shouted back as loud as he could.  
  
Brian laughed and that only made them moan with the vibrations. Justin lifted his hands and started rubbing Brian’s chest. Then his hands moved down until it reached the older man’s penis. Brian threw his head back and shook his head. He pushed Justin’s hand away because it was hard enough trying to concentrate with Justin inside of him. He wanted them to last.  
  
Justin pulled Brian closer to him. “You like riding me,” he gasped out and then licked Brian’s neck. “Tell me.”  
  
“Don’t,” Brian hissed. “Don’t,” he repeated. He refused to play one of Justin’s games with the guys so close.  
  
Justin arched his back as Brian gripped him. He ran his hand back and forward on the brunet’s thighs. “Yes,” Justin hissed. “Ride me, cowboy.”  
  
“Shut the fuck off,” Brian growled.  
  
“Make me,” Justin dared him.  
  
Brian grabbed the blond’s wrists and pushed them above his head pinning them to the bed. He smirked and licked Justin’s lips before he kissed the blond hard. His tongue slipped inside the blond’s mouth, claiming him; silencing the man.  
  
Justin fought him until he was able to pull one of his arms free. Then he wrapped his fingers on Brian’s hair and pulled as he kissed the brunet. He loved when Brian got rough, if the brunet only knew how weak that made him. His toes curled and he pulled Brian’s mouth away from him. He licked Brian’s neck and then bit on it. “Let go of me,” he whispered.  
  
“No,” Brian groaned. He knew that Justin shook in his arms when he was rough. He grinned and grabbed Justin’s free hand. Then this time when Justin tried to pull free, he didn’t let him.  
  
Justin laughed and didn’t insist again. His breathing was shallow by then and all he wanted was to cum so badly. “Harder.”  
  
But Brian would go slower and just when Justin was relaxing into the rhythm the older man would pick up the pace again.  
  
“Ah,” Justin groaned when Brian managed to rip his orgasm out of him. “Fuck yes.”  
  
“Fuck!” Brian moaned and spilled his cum in between them. He dropped on top of the blond exhausted. He closed his eyes and didn’t move for nothing in the world.  
  
“The delivery guy is here,” Emmett said from the door. “And Michael left.”  
  
Brian lifted his head. “How long have you been there?!” he asked angry.  
  
Emmett smiled. “Wouldn’t you want to know?” he asked in a teasing way. He couldn’t believe it. Brian getting fucked by Justin was a beautiful sight. He hadn’t been planning on snooping on them but apparently Michael had and on his hasty exit had left the door to the bedroom open.   
  
“Fuck off,” Brian hissed as he moved to the side. He didn’t remember hearing the other man.  
  
Justin smile a bit as Emmett left them. He knew that Emmett had arrived for the big finish but he wasn’t the one that had opened the door. He had seen Michael do it and then glaring at them before he was moving away. Brian had been so into them that he hadn’t heard his best friend.   
  
Justin rolled on top of Brian and kissed him hard. “Go pay for my dinner.”  
  
“Go pay yourself,” Brian spat out.  
  
Justin got up from the bed and grabbed Brian’s pants. “Whatever you say babe,” he said in a sarcastic way and walked naked to go pay the guy with Brian’s money.  
  
“Fuck,” Brian said as he got up and went to the bathroom. He took a quick shower and when he got out he put on a pair of shorts and went to the living room.  
  
“Want some food?” Justin asked. He was wearing a pair of shorts.   
  
Brian walked behind Justin and kissed him on the neck. “Why did Michael left?” he asked the guys.  
  
“He saw you guys,” Emmett informed him. “I told him not to but he wanted to see what you two were doing?”  
  
“More like he wanted to see Brian naked,” Justin said with his mouth full.  
  
Brian rolled his eyes as opened the box of hot wings. “He acts like a kid sometimes, I swear to god,” he muttered to himself as he walked away with the wings.  
  
“Can I have some of those?” Justin asked.  
  
“No,” Brian said as he opened the fridge and grabbed a beer.  
  
“Hey you freaking glutton,” Justin yelled. “Give me a wing!”  
  
“Fuck off,” Brian told him. “You should have ordered your own.”  
  
“Those are the ones I ordered!” Justin hissed. “Bitch,” he muttered.  
  
Emmett and Ted looked at each other and laughed.  
  
“I paid for them,” Brian pointed out and smiled and Justin.  
  
“Whatever,” Justin muttered with a pout. Then he went and sat down on the sofa to watch the movie that Ted had put on.  
  
Brian went and sat down too, next to the blond. They fought about the wings and Justin managed to get only two. Brian ate the rest. The brunet laughed with the guys, yelled at them, was quiet for a while and finally deduced he was having a good time and it was only because Justin was there.  
  
***  
  
 _I know who I want to take  
Me home, take me home_  
  
Brian looked at his watch and frowned. He signaled the bartender to fill his glass. He drank it and asked for another one. The bartender left the bottle there this time. Brian was in one of his moods and was going to drink the bottle and more.  
  
“What are you doing?” Michael asked angrily.  
  
Brian looked at him and sighed. “Can’t you see I’m getting drunk?” he asked and then gave Michael his famous grin.  
  
Michael stared at him with an arched brow. “Where is he?”  
  
“Who?” Brian asked pretending like he didn’t know whom Michael was talking about.  
  
“Justin,” Michael almost growled. “I saw you two,” he said, not being able to keep it inside any longer. “You were...the great big Brian Kinney,” he spat out. “If they could only see you.”  
  
Brian grabbed the bottle and drank from it. He looked at Michael who was glaring at him and his anger surfaced. How dare Michael get mad because of the things he did. He was the great big Brian Kinney after all and he did whatever he wanted whenever he wanted. He extended his arm and pulled Michael by the neck close to him. “Tell me, did it make you angry that his cock was up my ass and not yours?”  
  
Michael pulled away. He was boiling with anger. “Fuck you, Brian. Jesus! You’re drunk!”  
  
“Whatever,” Brian whispered and kept on drinking.  
  
“I’m taking you home,” Michael informed him and tried to grab Brian.  
  
“No,” Brian protested and pushed his friend away. He got up, served himself another glass and took it with him leaving the almost empty bottle behind. Then he went to stand next to a guy who was playing pool.  
  
“What’s wrong?” Emmett asked as he arrived with Ted. He had looked around Woody’s, that wasn’t quite full yet, and had spotted Michael right away.  
  
“Brian is acting up,” Michael said.  
  
“Again?” Ted asked and rolled his eyes. Then he asked for a beer and a cosmopolitan for Emmett.  
  
“I don’t know what’s wrong with him,” Michael told them. “He’s been acting so weird.”  
  
Emmett looked at Michael like he was nuts. “You mean because he’s not acting like before. A total asshole?”  
  
Michael frowned. “You don’t know him like I do.”  
  
“I think Justin knows him better,” Emmett challenged.  
  
Ted got in between the two friends. “How about if we play a game?” he asked.  
  
“Fuck you, Emmett,” Michael hissed. “How could you say that? Justin is nothing.”  
  
“Right,” Emmett drawled and took a sip of his drink. “I think you should get over yourself. Brian loves Justin and Justin loves him back. And you should stop trying to make problems for them. Just accept that Brian’s in love with someone and it’s not you.”  
  
Michael turned around and left them. He went straight towards Brian. He tried talking to the brunet but the man was ignoring him. Brian played a few games with the guys that were there then with Ted and Emmett. He kept staring at his watch and drinking like it was the end of the world.  
  
“That’s it,” Michael said getting tired of the whole situation. “Time to go home,” Michael told him.  
  
“I don’t think so,” Brian said. “I’m a big boy.”  
  
“You’re going home Brian,” Michael insisted.  
  
“You don’t tell me what to fucking do!” Brian yelled angrily.  
  
A few of the customers turned to look at them. Emmett looked at Ted with a worried expression. He didn’t know what to do.  
  
“Where is Justin?” Ted asked.  
  
“I don’t know,” Emmett said. “He was in New York but he was supposed to get back today. He should have been here by now.”  
  
“How do you know all this?” Michael asked as he turned to look at Emmett.  
  
Emmett shrugged. “We talk,” Emmett told them. “We’re friends.”  
  
Brian sighed and walked away from them. He looked at his watch yet again. He wondered where the blond was. He had plans for them.  
  
Emmett walked over to the brunet and pulled the beer that Brian just bought away from him. “Maybe you should go home.”  
  
“No,” Brian snapped and grabbed the beer again.  
  
Just then Justin walked inside the establishment. He was heading for Brian when a tall brunet gave him and inviting smile. He smiled back and followed the man.  
  
Brian had seen the whole thing and couldn’t help but smirk. He waited for the blond to get back and he didn’t have to wait long. The blond was out looking for him in a couple of minutes.  
  
“Miss me?” Justin asked.  
  
“No,” Brian told him.   
  
Justin’s smile grew bigger. “I have a present for you.”  
  
“Do you now?” Brian asked.  
  
Justin nodded and grabbed Brian’s hand then pulled him towards the restrooms. When he opened the stall the guy that had smiled at Justin was there with his shirt off.   
  
“So, since you didn’t get me anything from New York you improvised here,” Brian said smirking as he stepped in front of the trick.  
  
The man tried to kiss him but Brian turned him around and pushed him against the stall. He looked at Justin and grinned. “Get in here.”  
  
Justin got inside and locked the stall door. He helped the trick getting his pants down. Brian got a condom out and put it on quickly. Justin started jerking the guy who was already quivering with need. He screamed when Brian pushed inside of him.  
  
“Give him a few minutes,” Justin said in a husky voice. “We want him to enjoy this too.”  
  
Brian nodded and waited. He had never waited before, but since he met Justin things were different. Justin liked pain but he also liked giving pleasure. If they talked about Brian before being so fucking fantastic, now they talked all the more about him, now tricks were having Brian and Justin fucking them. The pair was starting to become very famous with everyone. And now that Justin was a permanent fixture in Brian’s life they didn’t consider the brunet to be such an asshole.  
  
“You like him inside of you?” Justin asked on the trick’s ear. “He’s so big, isn’t he?”  
  
“Yes,” the trick moaned and pushed back.  
  
“Yeah,” Brian groaned and started fucking the guy. His hands had a good hold on the man. His head thrown back and his breathing shallow.   
  
Justin watched them for a while without doing anything. “Stop,” he said.  
  
Brian opened his eyes and arched a brow.   
  
“Bend him over so he can suck me while you fuck him,” Justin said as he unzipped his pants and took his cock out.  
  
Brian started fucking the man again and watched as the trick sucked his blond. Justin let the trick suck him but when he was getting close he fucked the man’s mouth. The trick was in heaven as Brian and Justin did with him what they wanted. He grabbed his cock and started masturbating himself. He clamped down on Brian when he started shooting his cum; he made sure to capture it in his hand so he wouldn’t make a mess. The trick’s orgasm triggered Brian’s and Justin seeing Brian cum made him spill his cum in the guy’s mouth.  
  
“Fuck,” the trick said as he stood up straight. “Fuck,” he repeated with a smile in place.  
  
Justin smiled and pushed Brian against the door. He kissed him hard before he pulled back. “Liked it?”  
  
Brian smirked as he did his pants. He threw the condom in the toilet and headed out of there with Justin behind him.  
  
“Hey, baby,” Emmett said as he kissed Justin on the cheek. He looked at Brian who seemed to have sobered up. “How was your trip?”  
  
“Delicious,” Justin told him.  
  
“I thought it was a business trip,” Ted piped up.  
  
“Among other things,” Justin answered before he turned to Brian. “Want to get out of here?”  
  
“You want to go to Babylon?” Brian asked as sat in one of the stools.  
  
“Actually,” the blond said. “I was thinking of going home,” Justin whispered in the man’s ear. “I did miss you and I want you to fuck me hard.”  
  
Brian turned his head to look at the blond. He kissed him hard and then got up from the stool. “Let’s go home then.”  
  
***  
  
_I love the way you look at me  
I love the way you smack my ass  
I love the dirty things you do_   
  
Justin arched a brow when Brian kissed him roughly. “What are you doing?”  
  
“What does it look like?” Brian asked.  
  
Justin let the brunet and his mind started racing with what HE wanted to do to the brunet.  
  
“I want to fuck you so hard,” Brian muttered.  
  
Justin’s cock twitched. “Do,” he whispered.  
  
Brian finished getting their clothes off and got in bed with the blond. He caressed Justin’s face and smiled when Justin reached for his cock. He loved the way Justin wanted the same things with him.  
  
“Kiss me while I give you the best hand job ever,” Justin muttered.  
  
Brian chuckled but started kissing the blond. He never stopped kissing Justin as the blond jerked him off. He loved the way Justin knew each thing he liked.   
  
“Wait,” Brian said pulling his head back. “I don’t want to cum like this.”  
  
Justin stopped and reached for a condom. He ripped it open and put it on Brian. He threw his legs over Brian’s shoulder and closed his eyes as the brunet slipped inside of him. His walls squeezed the brunet; he just loved to do that.  
  
“Fuck yeah,” Brian said as he started moving his hips. “God, how the fuck do you keep this tight?”  
  
Justin smiled and moved his hips to get and give the most pleasure. He opened his eyes briefly before they closed again. His hands gripped Brian’s arms for leverage. It felt so good to have Brian fucking him hard. Their bodies slowly ended up covered with sweat.  
  
“Yes,” Justin said loving the way his cock was getting the perfect amount of pressure.  
  
“Want to cum?” Brian asked his voice rough making Justin shake even more.  
  
“Yes,” Justin groaned. “Fuck me hard, Brian. Make me spill my cum in between us. Come on.”  
  
Brian picked up the pace and started hammering inside of Justin. One of his hands grabbed the blond by his neck and his hold tightened it a bit. Justin hissed Brian’s name before he showered them with cum. The brunet threw his head back as he let go of the blond’s neck. He squeezed Justin’s body as he climaxed; his body dropping on top of the smaller man.  
  
“Oh fuck!” Brian hissed as he pulled out of the blond. He licked his upper lip and smiled. He could feel his back stinging a bit and he was sure that Justin had scratched him; he hadn’t even noticed.  
  
Justin got on top of Brian. “Fuck me again.”  
  
“I need a minute here,” Brian told him.  
  
Justin smiled like the cat that ate the canary. “You’re getting old.”  
  
Brian turned them around quickly. He wasn’t ready to fuck the blond yet but he knew what to do to the blond to gain the strength he needed. Justin pushed their hands above their heads as the brunet started kissing him. Then suddenly Brian felt something cold around his wrist.   
  
“What are you doing?” Brian asked when he saw that it was a pair of cuffs. “Oh no!”  
  
In a heartbeat Justin was cuffing Brian to the bed.   
  
“No,” Brian said once again. “Motherfucker,” he said to no one in particular.  
  
Justin laughed and quickly got out of bed. He opened the little compartment under the night table and pulled out another pair of handcuffs.  
  
“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked. He couldn’t believe that the blond was handcuffing him...again.  
  
Justin got in bed and used the other pair to handcuff Brian’s free hand to the bed as well. “Having fun. Lay back.”  
  
“The fuck I will,” Brian hissed. “Let me go.”  
  
“No,” Justin told him shaking his head. “I think you’re ready for more now.”  
  
Brian understood what the blond meant. After his surgery they did have sex but it was very routine...at least with the way Justin liked to have sex with him. Only a few weeks ago they had started to have rougher sex, it looked like Justin was ready to have more fun.  
  
“I have something for my naughty boy,” Justin said and smiled.  
  
Brian didn’t even want to imagine what Justin was going to do to him now. Justin left the bed once again and came back with a black scarf and a red dildo, a big one.  
  
“No, Justin,” Brian told him. “Have you lost your mind?”  
  
Justin ignored everything Brian was saying. The brunet knew how he could stop everything but he always chose not to, no matter how much he protested. Justin grabbed the lube and started to cover the dildo with the liquid.  
  
“Justin,” Brian said the name with warning in his voice.  
  
“If you’re a bad boy I’m going to blindfold you,” Justin informed him and then pushed one of Brian’s legs up and over his thigh. He stuck a finger inside his mouth and coated it with saliva before said finger went in search of Brian’s anus.  
  
“Fuck,” Brian hissed when Justin pushed inside of him. Then the blond found his prostate and started torturing him.  
  
Justin watched Brian’s face and he smiled. He knew Brian loved every minute of it. He started adding fingers one by one until he was finger fucking the brunet and Brian was buckling wildly. When he was sure that Brian was ready he put the dildo at Brian’s entrance and started pushing it inside the brunet. Brian’s eyes rolled back and as much as he tried not to moan he failed.  
  
“Fuck,” Justin gasped out. “You look so hot taking it all.”  
  
Brian didn’t even bother talking. He knew it would be total failure. He felt the object pushing inside of him and it felt like it was never going to end.  
  
“Yes,” Justin told him in a husky voice as he pulled the dildo back and pushed deeper into Brian this time. He started fucking Brian with it loving how the bright red looked in contrast with Brian’s skin color; it was exquisite. The blond let go of the object to be able to spank Brian’s ass cheeks.  
  
“Justin!” Brian yelled.  
  
Justin kept repeating the pattern. He would fuck Brian with the dildo for a while and then stop to spank the man. Then it all stopped and the smaller man reached for a condom. He opened it up and put it on Brian.   
  
Brian swallowed as he tried to even his breathing. “Let my hands free.”  
  
“No,” Justin hissed. He straddled Brian’s hips with his back to Brian’s face. Then he grabbed the man’s cock and put it at his entrance. He moaned as he lowered himself on the hard shaft.  
  
Brian groaned and let go of the last restrains he had over himself. He bucked wildly as he received pleasure from his blond demon. He was sure that he had never met someone like Justin in all his life. It was always something new with the man. He closed his eyes and his world shook from his axis. He moaned his pleasured before his body slumped in the bed.  
  
“No,” Justin protested. He hadn’t want Brian cumming yet but apparently he hadn’t been paying attention. He was so into having Brian fucking him while he fucked the older man with the dildo. He moved away and removed the condom off Brian. Then slowly he pulled the dildo off the man.  
  
Brian watched the blond through half opened lids. His body was still shaking from his orgasm. Justin moved up towards Brian’s face and then straddled the man.  
  
“Suck me,” Justin told him.  
  
“No,” Brian told him.  
  
Justin smirked and started to jerk off right in Brian’s face. It didn’t take long for him to cum. He spilled his hot cum on Brian’s face. Brian closed his eyes trying to think of a time when someone had done that to him or he had done it to anyone. He found his answer; never. Justin was doing things that he never expected and didn’t think he would have been able to do.  
  
Justin smiled and moved his body on top of Brian. He started to lick his own cum from Brian’s face. Then when he was done he kissed the man hard. “You know, you drive me crazy.”  
  
“Are you going to let me go?” Brian asked.  
  
“No,” Justin informed him. Then he got up and took the dildo he had used with Brian along with the used condom before he disappeared towards the bathroom. He came back with a condom in his hand. “I’m still horny.”  
  
“You don’t say,” Brian drawled.  
  
Justin got in the bed and turned Brian face down. Brian didn’t even bother to complain. He just waited patiently for the blond to do his worst. Justin left the bed and came back fairly quickly. Then to Brian’s surprised the blond started rimming him.  
  
“Jus,” Brian moaned with pleasure.   
  
Justin smiled and grabbed one of the ice cubes he had gone to get in the kitchen. He put it on his mouth and sucked on it for a while.  
  
“What are you doing?” Brian asked as he turned his head back trying to see what the blond was doing.  
  
Justin put the ice back with the rest and went back to rimming the brunet.  
  
“Fuck!” Brian hissed as his body tensed up.  
  
“You’ll love it,” Justin assured him. He did it a few times again before he grabbed the condom and put it on. Then he entered the brunet slowly.  
  
Brian wished his hands were free because there wasn’t anything more that he wanted than to touch his cock. He was so hard and it felt so good to have Justin fucking him. The blond was keeping a steady pace and he was trying to prolong it as much as possible before he stopped completely.  
  
“Jus,” Brian murmured.   
  
Justin smiled and licked Brian’s jaw. He pulled Brian’s head back by the hair. “Let me hear you say you want me to fuck you hard.”  
  
Brian kept quiet.  
  
“Say it,” Justin hissed.  
  
“The fuck I will!” Brian yelled.  
  
“I want to hear you, Brian,” Justin told him as he started pulling away slowly. “You’re not cumming until you say it.”  
  
Brian closed his eyes trying to be stronger. He swore that Justin would never get him into that position once again. He had learned fairly quickly that Justin was a kinky bastard. He didn’t mind playing games with the blond he just hated that Justin always seemed to have all the control.  
  
“Brian,” Justin whispered as he leaned forward. He licked Brian’s earlobe and smiled when the brunet moaned. “Tell me, Brian. It makes me so hard and so out of control that I lose it. You want me to shoot my cum deep inside you, don’t you?”  
  
Brian closed his eyes and he imagined Justin’s face as he orgasm. It was a beautiful thing. “Fuck me,” Brian told him.  
  
“Yes,” Justin groaned.  
  
“I’m a naughty boy,” Brian muttered.  
  
“More,” Justin moaned close to Brian’s ear.  
  
“I’m all yours,” Brian told him. “I’m your dirty boy and I want your cock so much.”  
  
“You know you do,” Justin told him with a chuckle. “Tell me.”  
  
“I want it to rip me open,” Brian hissed. And he did, he wanted to feel Justin’s hard cock pushing inside of him; claiming him.   
  
Justin’s hips started moving again. He was out of control as he fucked the man. Brian groaned as he splashed his cum all over the sheets. He felt so ashamed and yet if Justin asked him to do it all over again he would.   
  
Justin pulled out of Brian and got rid of the condom. He moved to get the keys and unlocked the handcuffs. “Oh shit,” he said.  
  
“What?” Brian asked opened his eyes.  
  
“I lost the keys,” Justin informed him as he looked around desperately.  
  
The brunet sighed. “Go find them, then.”  
  
“That’s okay,” Justin told him. “I’ll call the cops and they’ll come and set you free.”  
  
“No way!” Brian shouted.  
  
Justin started laughing. He straddled the man and kissed him on the back of the neck. “You’re so easy.”  
  
Brian shook his head and as soon as he was free he pushed Justin on his back. The blond laughed and was happy to receive the man in his arms.  
  
“We’re going to have a talk,” Brian informed him.  
  
“What’s that?” Justin asked caressing Brian’s face.   
  
“I don’t like these things you make me do,” Brian told him.  
  
“Liar,” Justin blurted out and laughed. “You like them,” Justin said as he pulled the duvet over them.  
  
“I don’t,” Brian hissed.  
  
“You would have walked away from me if you didn’t,” Justin pointed out.  
  
Brian frowned and bit his lower lip.  
  
“Ah, silence,” Justin teased. “Funny when the truth comes out nothing else needs to be said.”  
  
“Fuck off,” Brian hissed.   
  
Justin wrapped his left arm around Brian’s waist. “Night, stud.”  
  
Brian sighed as he put his head on Justin’s chest. Then he closed his eyes and went to sleep contently.  
  
***  
  
 _There is still a little bit of your taste in my mouth  
There is still a little bit of you, lace with my doubts  
There is still a little hard to say, what’s going on_  
  
Brian knocked on the door and waited. He looked at Justin with a smile and pulled him closer by the hem of his jacket. He kissed him hard and started rubbing against him.  
  
“There not here,” Justin panted. “God I want you.”  
  
Brian was about to pull the blond back towards the car when the door opened and Debbie rushed them inside.  
  
“The boys are here,” Debbie shouted as she walked to the kitchen. “We can eat now.”  
  
“We thought you were never going to come here,” Lindsay said.   
  
Brian smiled and walked over to Gus. He picked him up and kissed him on the forehead. He smiled when Gus tried to reach for Justin who had stepped next to him. “My son doesn’t want me anymore.”  
  
“That’s not true,” Justin said. “He just recognizes that I’m cuter.”  
  
Brian rolled his eyes as he gave Gus to Justin. Then he moved to sit at the table.   
  
“So, what have you guys been up to?” Lindsay asked. “Are you having any shows, Justin?”  
  
“Soon,” Justin told her. “I’ll let you know when.”  
  
Lindsay smiled happily. She always enjoyed Justin’s art shows. The rest of the family went and sat on the table as well. Michael didn’t lose anytime in sitting next to Brian. Justin didn’t even care; he sat in between Emmett and Melanie with Gus on his lap.  
  
“I’m hungry,” Gus informed them.  
  
Debbie smiled as she looked at Gus and the blond. They were adorable together. The family ate and talked about what each of them was doing. Then came dessert and Justin and Gus were eagerly waiting for it. Debbie was happy to feed the boys.  
  
“This is really good,” Justin said as he ate the pie. “Jeez, I could die a happy man.”  
  
Gus grabbed a piece of the apple with his hands and shared it with Justin. Justin ate it and then cleaned the boy’s hand.  
  
“They’re so cute,” Emmett whispered to Lindsay.  
  
Lindsay smiled and nodded.  
  
Brian watched the blond eating and he wished he was sitting right next to him. He wanted to know what it would be like to kiss the blond right then; Justin’s unique taste mixed with the apple pie. He shook his head and got up. He needed fresh air.  
  
Michael got up and followed his friend. He found Brian lighting a joint. “Hey,” he said.  
  
Brian looked back at his friend before he went back to staring at the road.   
  
“What’s happening with you Brian?” Michael asked crossing his arms. “Why are you and Justin still together?”  
  
Brian shrugged. “I can’t explain it,” the brunet answered.  
  
Michael frowned. “Is he that good in bed?”  
  
Brian glared at his best friend. “Don’t start.”  
  
Michael didn’t know what to do. He always thought he would be the one to end up with Brian. That the day Brian was ready to settle down it would be with him. Then Justin had to come along and screw everything up. “I don’t think he’s good for you.”  
  
“I think he’s perfect for me,” Brian said smiling.   
  
They looked back as the front door opened. Vic was standing there. “You guys aren’t going to have dessert?”  
  
“I’m okay,” Brian told him.  
  
“Michael, why don’t you go and help your mother,” Vic said to him.  
  
Michael grimaced but nodded nonetheless. He went back inside the house.  
  
“So,” Vic said as he slowly walked up to the brunet until he was standing next to him.  
  
Brian looked at Vic with an arched brow.   
  
Vic smiled and came closer to the brunet. “Gus was running around the house because Justin was chasing him.”  
  
Brian smiled.   
  
“I’ve never heard that boy laugh so much,” Vic said. “It was contagious.”  
  
Brian nodded with happiness. He knew that his son was smitten with the blond just like he was.  
  
“You love Justin, don’t you?” Vic asked.  
  
Brian smirked. Everyone, including him wanted to know that question. He didn’t know what to answer.  
  
“Well, do you?” Vic asked.  
  
“I don’t know, Vic,” Brian informed him. “There is something about him, I’ll tell you that much.”  
  
“That’s a start,” Vic informed him.  
  
“I just...” Brian sighed.   
  
“You’re scared,” Vic said.  
  
“No,” Brian answered. “It’s not that.”  
  
“Then what?” Vic asked.  
  
“I don’t know,” Brian told him as he shrugged. “He’s almost like he’s not real.”  
  
“Why?” Vic asked.  
  
“It seems like he fits with me so well,” Brian told him. “I mean, is not always so great. We do have fights.”  
  
Vic nodded and listened.  
  
“But when everything is fine, then is just perfect,” Brian said and groaned. “God, listen to me talk. What the fuck is happening to me?”  
  
Vic smiled and put his hand on Brian’s shoulder. “I think is love.”  
  
Brian threw the roach on the pavement and stepped on it. “I’m going back inside.”  
  
Vic laughed a bit knowing that even if Brian didn’t like to admit it, he was scared. Even a person who was normally into the relationship business would be scared of them. It was always something new and there had to be a lot of communication along with compromise. He wondered how well Brian could deal with that, but he was sure that Brian and Justin were made for each other; they understood each other.  
  
“Brian,” Justin said when Brian was inside. “Your kid is going to give me a heart attack. He’s so full of energy.”  
  
Brian grabbed Gus when the boy ran to them. “What are you doing to Justin?”  
  
“Nothing,” Gus said in a high-pitched tone. “We’re playing!”  
  
Brian kissed the boy before he put him down.   
  
“Catch me, Justin!” Gus screamed.  
  
Justin was about to move after the boy but Brian stopped him. Brian pulled him closer and kissed him hard. He pulled back and smiled. “Sweet,” he whispered. Justin’s taste was so great. The blond smiled at him and then went to chase after the little brunet.  
  
Brian watched him go and sat down. He knew some of his friends were looking at him but he didn’t care. After a while he joined Justin and Gus. Things were perfect between them at the moment. So many things had change along the way and Brian didn’t know what else would happen. He had so many doubts about what was happening with him and the blond but he was willing to stay a bit longer and see where things headed.

***

_I dare you to move like today never  
Happened, today never happened before_  
  
Justin stared at Brian not sure what to say. He was going to answer but the look on Brian’s face told him it was better to keep quiet. Brian pushed Justin off of him and got up heading towards the bathroom. He took off the condom and threw it in the thrash before he got into the shower.  
  
The blond stayed in the bedroom. He put on a pair of sweats and decided to change the sheets. He didn’t know what he was going to say when Brian came out. If anything like that had happened to him before he would have walked out and never looked back. It was just not the thing he liked or wished for. He closed his eyes and sat in the bed waiting for Brian to come out.   
  
An hour later when Brian came out Justin still was sitting on the bed. He got dressed quickly and headed out of the loft. Justin was able to go after him.  
  
“Where are you going?” Justin asked as Brian opened the elevator.  
  
“It’s none of your business,” Brian spat out.  
  
“I can’t believe you’re going to act like this,” Justin shouted. “You’re being ridiculous.”  
  
“I don’t want to talk about this,” Brian growled as he got inside and closed the doors. “I’ll be back later,” he said and was gone.  
  
Justin ran his fingers through his hair and didn’t know what to do. He went back to the loft and closed the door. He took a shower before he got dressed and left for his apartment. Once he was there he called Daphne.   
  
“What are you doing?” Daphne asked.  
  
“Not much,” Justin told her. “I just got home.”  
  
“Where were you?” she asked as she sat down on her desk to listen to the blond. She was sure that Justin was dying to tell her something.  
  
“At Brian’s,” he informed her.   
  
“Mmm, looks like someone it’s been having fun,” Daphne told him. “You two are so going to end up married.”  
  
“Yeah, right,” Justin said rolling his eyes. He went to the fridge and grabbed a soda. “I don’t think so. Who knows we might not see each other again.”  
  
“Did something happen?” Daphne asked.  
  
Justin stayed quiet. “I’m just saying,” he said after a while. “So what have you been up to?”  
  
“Not much,” Daphne said knowing that the subject had been change and she would have to wait until she was face to face with the blond to dig for more information. That’s the only way her charm worked. “I met a guy.”  
  
“You don’t say,” Justin said smiling as he sat on the sofa. “What’s his name?”  
  
“Simon,” Daphne told her. “He’s so fucking hot.”  
  
“Describe,” Justin told her.   
  
“He’s tall with a nice tan,” Daphne related. “He has black hair and green eyes and a smile to die for. He is build and simply gorgeous.”  
  
Justin was happy for Daphne. “Have you guys fucked?”  
  
“Justin!” Daphne yelled before she laughed.  
  
“Uh, I’m thinking yes,” Justin told her then he took a sip of the can soda. “Is he good?”  
  
“Fucking amazing,” Daphne informed him. “God, I think I’m in love.”  
  
Justin frowned and cleared his throat. “Look I have to go.”  
  
“What?” Daphne asked taken aback. “Did I say something wrong?”  
  
“No,” Justin assured her. “I just have so much work to do, really Daphne. I’ll call you tomorrow.”  
  
Daphne sighed and nodded. “Okay, we’ll talk later.”  
  
“Bye,” Justin said and hung up. He threw his head back and wished his problems would just vanish. He could pretend like nothing had happened; he only wondered if Brian could do the same.  
  
The blond got up and decided to work on a few of his pieces. He had a show in a month or so and he practically had nothing done. He went to change and started working. He didn’t know how long he had been there but the knock at the studio door pulled him out of his trance.   
  
“Brian,” he said when he saw the brunet standing there.  
  
“I knocked but since you didn’t answer I used the key you gave me,” Brian told him.  
  
Justin nodded slowly as he put the brush down. He looked at Brian and didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what Brian was going to tell him.  
  
“We need to talk,” Brian informed him.  
  
“Do we?” Justin asked. He was pretty sure that he would have fallen to the floor if he hadn’t been sitting. His body was shaking with fear but he was putting up a courageous front.  
  
“I think so,” Brian told him. “Don’t you?”  
  
“That depends on where you’ve been,” Justin said as he got up and walked over to the brunet. “Have you been drinking and taking drugs?”  
  
“Mostly,” the brunet answered as he pulled the blond closer by the waist. “I want to fuck you.”  
  
Justin wrapped his arms around Brian and kissed him hard. He pulled back to stare at the brunet. “Do you want to pretend like it never happened?”  
  
“No,” Brian said as he slowly started to take the blond’s clothes. “I think we should talk about it.”  
  
Justin let Brian do whatever he wanted. He wasn’t saying a thing but Brian looked pretty scared and yet the man was acting like he wasn’t.  
  
“Okay,” Brian said. “Let’s be mature about this.”  
  
Justin nodded even thought he wasn’t sure what Brian was thinking.  
  
“I said it,” Brian licked his lips as he pulled Justin to him. He kissed the blond’s neck. “And I meant it,” he whispered.  
  
“But it scared you,” Justin pointed out.  
  
“It still does,” Brian muttered. He didn’t even know why he had said what he said.  
  
Justin frowned as he looked at the floor.   
  
Brian shrugged and scratched his left arm. He pulled Justin’s head up so the blond would look at him. “But...I’m not running away. I’m right here.”  
  
Justin looked up and kissed Brian on the jaw. He reached for Brian’s zipper and opened it slowly. He pulled the man’s cock out and started massaging the hard member.   
  
Brian felt like he was burning up and would be consume by real fire in no time. His hands were sweaty and when he touched the blond it felt like he was touching sand. He was definitely uncomfortable with the situation at hand. He didn’t know if he was going to be okay like he said he was.  
  
Justin looked up at Brian. “So you said it and no one has to know.”  
  
Brian felt relief with Justin’s words. At least no one else would know.  
  
“Just like no one has to know that I love you too,” Justin told him.   
  
Brian smiled and pulled him closer. He kissed him hard thinking they were just fucking nuts.  
  
***  
  
 _Look at me losing control, thinking I  
Had a hold but with feelings this strong   
I’m no longer the master of my emotions_  
  
Brian sat down on the booth where Emmett, Ted and Michael were sitting down. He smiled briefly at them before he asked for a coffee.   
  
“So, where is Justin?” Emmett asked.  
  
“What do you care?” Michael asked annoyed. He would be happy if they could go for a day without talking about Justin.  
  
“He’s around being the naughty boy he knows how to be,” Brian answered.  
  
“Jesus,” Ted said shaking his head.  
  
Emmett laughed as he shook his head. Brian and Justin were so alike that it was uncanny.  
  
“Are we going to Babylon tonight?” Michael asked.  
  
Brian shrugged. “Maybe.”  
  
“I have a lot of work to do,” Ted told them. “So don’t count me in.”  
  
“What? Have to consult it with Justin?” Michael asked and glared at the brunet.  
  
“I do whatever the fuck I want to,” Brian said. He got up and went to get a lemon bar. He went to sit down with the boys again. He asked Michael what he’d been up to but for some reason Emmett started laughing really hard while Michael glared at him and Ted stared with a shocked face.  
  
“Oh my god,” Emmett said throwing his head back. His laughter wouldn’t stop.  
  
“What?” Brian asked as he swallowed.   
  
“What did you just call me?” Michael asked shocked.  
  
“What?” Brian asked yet again.  
  
Emmett was laughing while Ted shook his head.  
  
“I can’t fucking believe you, Brian!” he screamed and got up.  
  
“What?” Brian asked not having a clue what the fuck Michael was so frantic about.  
  
“You called me Justin!” Michael hissed. “Fuck you, Brian!”  
  
Brian watched him go his eyes never leaving Michael until he was out of the establishment. “What’s with him? Has he gone insane?”  
  
“You did call him Justin,” Ted pointed out. “You asked…what have you been up to, Justin?”  
  
Emmett controlled his laughter. “I can’t believe it.”  
  
“Did I really call him Justin?” Brian asked not believing it.  
  
“Yes,” Emmett chuckled. “What were you thinking about?”  
  
Brian sighed and rubbed his face. “Fuck me.”  
  
“Now?” Justin asked as he stood in front of them. “Hey, Em.”  
  
“Sweetie,” Emmett said with a wide smile. “Sit down. I have some news to tell you.”  
  
“Shut the fuck up,” Brian hissed.  
  
“He has a right to know,” Ted said smirking.  
  
“Whoa,” Justin said as he sat next to the brunet. “What’s going on?”  
  
“Brian is definitely going to kill me if I tell you,” Emmett said. “But I’ll die happy.”  
  
“I’ll miss you terribly,” Ted informed him as he patted Emmett’s back.  
  
“Don’t you dare,” Brian warned.  
  
“What?” Justin asked wondering what was going on.  
  
“He called Michael by your name,” Emmett and Ted blurted at the same time before they laughed.  
  
“Fuck you,” Brian hissed as he got up to leave.  
  
“Brian,” Justin said and smiled at Brian. “Why would you do something like that? Do you hate me?”  
  
Brian rolled his eyes.   
  
“I think is because he has you always on his mind,” Emmett added his two cents.  
  
“Go figure,” Ted quipped.  
  
Justin turned to Brian and leaned forward. He kissed the man and pulled just a few inches away. “You so love me,” he whispered.  
  
Brian glared at him.  
  
“Let’s go,” Justin told him and leaned closer to Brian’s ear. “I want to fuck you so hard.”  
  
Brian got up slowly and dropped a few bills. They said goodbye to Emmett and headed towards the loft. When they arrived they got out of the car and came close for a kiss. When they entered the elevator Brian attacked Justin. He pushed Justin against the wall hard and pulled him up. The blond wrapped his legs around the brunet and kissed him with equal force.  
  
“Fuck me!” Justin hissed. He wanted the brunet inside him at that moment.   
  
When the elevator stopped Brian managed to open the doors with one hand while he carried the blond. Justin helped some and then he was being pushed against the metal door hard. Justin moaned and grunted as Brian kissed him hard. Slowly, Justin dropped his legs to the floor so they could go inside. He wanted the brunet to fuck him or to fuck the brunet as long as they were naked and doing it he didn’t care.   
  
“The door,” Brian said after a while. He pulled out his keys and opened it.   
  
They stepped inside and Justin closed the door. Brian grabbed Justin and kissed him hard. He started by ripping Justin’s shirt off. Then he undid the blond’s pants before he concentrated on kissing Justin. The blond thought that Brian wanted to swallow his tongue. They fell down on the floor with the older man on top of Justin.   
  
“What did you take?” Justin asked.  
  
“Nothing,” Brian assured him. He was being honest; he had only had a few drinks.  
  
“God,” Justin growled. “Fuck me!”  
  
Brian pulled on Justin’s hair hard. He wanted the blond so much. He hugged him close trying to become one with his boy. Brian groaned as Justin pulled on his hair as well. He pulled back and stared at the blond.   
  
“Are you trying to kill me?” Brian asked.  
  
“Are you?” Justin asked out of breath.  
  
“Up,” Brian growled as he got on his knees. He pulled Justin towards him and kissed him.   
  
It took him a few more minutes but finally Brian managed to get Justin up and into the bedroom. The brunet pushed Justin back in the bed and stepped back. He didn’t know what was happening to him. He knew he had admitted to loving Justin but he wasn’t sure what that meant. He’d been holding on to the blond when the words slipped out of his mouth. He was so confused with everything that was going between them and now they were acting crazy. Now each time Justin was close to him he wanted to jump his bones.  
  
Justin frowned as he kneeled in the bed. “Brian, let’s not think about this right now. I’m so fucking horny and I want you inside of me.”  
  
“Did I hurt you?” Brian asked.  
  
Justin shoo his head. When he had fall down with Brian on top of him his back had received most of the blow. He knew he would be bruised and sore in the morning. “I want you so bad,” he said looking back at Brian. “Please. Don’t make me beg.”  
  
Brian walked closer to Justin and caressed the blond’s face. He wanted Justin to be part of him in ways he couldn’t understand. He wanted to swallow the man whole. He wanted their skin to fuse together; he wanted to live in eternal pleasure with his blond. He pushed Justin back and started getting rid of his clothes.  
  
Justin did the same as he watched the brunet. He was burning up with desire. He wanted the brunet to surround him. The need for Brian was almost choking him. “Hurry up,” he said.  
  
Brian got on top of the blond and they moved as fast as they could. Justin reached for a condom and some lube while Brian had started to open him with his own saliva. Once Brian was inside of Justin time stopped. Everything was calm now and they had what they wanted. They melted, they surrounded each other; they gave their souls to one another. They surrendered to whatever they were feeling and was taking possession of them.  
  
***  
  
 _You’re really lovely underneath it all,  
You want to love me, underneath it all,   
I’m really lucky, underneath it all you really love me_  
  
Justin frowned as he finished his painting. He shook his head walked over to the sink and started cleaning his brushes. He hated the damn thing. He bit his lower lip and walked away leaving the brushes under the flowing water. “Brian,” the blond said as he went into their bedroom.   
  
Brian groaned and rolled on his stomach trying to pretend like Justin wasn’t there.  
  
“Wake up,” Justin said as he got in bed and straddled the brunet.  
  
“No,” Brian protested.  
  
“Come on,” Justin told him. “I need you.”  
  
“I’m sore,” Brian told him. “Stay away from me.”  
  
Justin smiled from ear to ear. He was sore as hell too. They had stayed all night fucking each other until they had no more energy. He bent down and kissed Brian’s neck. “My poor baby.”  
  
“Stop that,” Brian told him. He rolled his body making the blond fall off of him. Then he sat up and rubbed his left eye. “What time is it?”  
  
“It’s like eleven,” Justin told him.  
  
“Why are you up so early?” Brian asked throwing the covers away and walking to the bathroom.   
  
Justin got up and followed him. He sat on the bathroom counter and watched the brunet taking a leak. “I need you to tell me something. I made a painting and I want you to tell me what you think.”  
  
Brian finished what he was doing and went to wash his hands. “Okay,” Brian said as he headed out and towards Justin studio. “But only if you come back to bed to sleep or at the least let me sleep.”  
  
Justin nodded and walked behind Brian. “That one there.”  
  
Brian looked at it and frowned. He crossed his arms and stared without saying anything. Justin waited quietly hoping that Brian didn’t say he liked it because he didn’t like it himself. It wasn’t some of his best work.  
  
“I don’t know,” Brian told him. “I’m not feeling anything.”  
  
“What?” Justin asked.  
  
“I usually feel something,” Brian explained. “Hate, excitement, sadness, happiness, cruelty, etc.”  
  
Justin didn’t know that. He smiled and walked over to the sink. He turned off the water and then walked to get one of the biggest brushes he own. He took some paint and went towards the new painting.  
  
“What are you doing?” Brian asked and frowned when Justin started painting white the whole canvas. “You didn’t have to do that.”  
  
“I don’t like it,” Justin told him.  
  
“You could have fixed it,” Brian pointed out.  
  
Justin shrugged.  
  
“I’m going back to bed,” Brian said.  
  
Justin nodded and let him. He stayed working on the painting that he wanted to get out but for some reason it wouldn’t. When he took a break to eat Brian had left. He wished he had come earlier and gotten a piece of what he really wanted to eat. When he was done he went back to the painting. He was running out of time slowly.  
  
“Are you still here?” Brian asked when he came back to Justin’s apartment to find him still on his studio. The blond didn’t even hear him come in. “I went home, did some work and then went to the gym. I had dinner with Mikey and then went to Woody’s.”  
  
Justin turned to look at Brian. “You smell of sex.”  
  
“It was good sex,” Brian told him as he got behind the blond. “What are you doing?”  
  
“I think I lost my knack,” Justin informed him. “Nothing comes to me.”  
  
“I can cum with you,” Brian informed him.  
  
Justin laughed and got up. “You need a shower first.”  
  
“Bathe me,” Brian told him in a teasing tone. “Come on,” he said grabbing the blond by the waist.   
  
When they reached the bathroom Justin started to undo Brian’s buttons slowly. The brunet had a smile in his face. He let Justin do things at his own pace. He wasn’t going anywhere; they had all the time in the world.  
  
“Are you going to fuck me hard, Mr.?” Justin asked like a little kid. Then his hands started rubbing Brian’s erection through his pants.  
  
Brian groaned as he closed his eyes and threw his head back. “Shower now.”  
  
Justin finished getting everyone undressed. Then they stepped into the shower. He took his time on washing Brian everywhere. They were both horny as hell. They sucked each other in the shower before they move the rest of their festivities to the bedroom.  
  
Brian sat on the edge of the bed and Justin went and straddled him. They kissed hard as they rubbed their hard member against each other.   
  
“You love me,” Justin said and laughed.   
  
The brunet dropped back with Justin on top of him. Then he turned around so he could be on top. “Let me think about it,” Brian said.  
  
Justin arched a brow.  
  
“I might,” the older man whispered.  
  
Justin grabbed Brian’s left hand and started licking the man’s fingers. “You know what you should do?”  
  
“What’s that?” Brian asked and he felt his cock stirring against Justin’s thigh.  
  
“Show me,” Justin said.  
  
“What?” Brian asked.  
  
“Words are nothing but bullshit,” Justin told him. “Now show me.”  
  
Brian had a little smile playing on his lips. He kissed Justin and then pulled back getting on his knees. He made the blond bend his knees and started by kissing Justin’s nipples. Then he started nibbling on them making the blond moan. His tongue came out to play shortly after than. A wet trail appeared that headed down towards the blond’s cock.   
  
The older man sucked Justin for a while. He would bring Justin almost to the edge and then made him step away. When he thought Justin had enough torture he turned the blond around and made him stand on all fours. He didn’t do anything for a few minutes, just staring at the blond. Then he started to touch Justin’s butt, his cock, his chest, everything he could to drive the blond crazy.  
  
“Brian,” Justin said.  
  
“Quiet,” Brian ordered. “I’m trying to tell you something here.”  
  
Justin’s smile was little but a smile nonetheless. His shoulders hit the bed as soon as Brian started using his tongue to open him up. He buckled against the brunet wanting nothing more but to have Brian deep inside of him.  
  
“God,” Brian groaned. He couldn’t take it anymore. He had bathed the bed sheets with pre cum by now and he was sure that he wasn’t the only one. He grabbed a condom and dressed his cock. He found the right place and pushed hard inside Justin.  
  
Justin groaned and clamped down on the taller man. He gripped the sheets and let the pain course through him. Then the beautiful feeling that Brian made him feel hit him. His whole body was enveloped in pleasure. “Fuck me.”  
  
Brian did just that. He moved his hips slowly, trying to send Justin his message. He touched the blond everywhere and kissed him as well. Their sweat mingled as their skin kissed each other. Brian was in heaved as he fucked the blond. Justin liked the message he was getting. He could understand it so well.  
  
“Come with me,” Brian growled in Justin’s ear as he grabbed the man’s cock. His fingers wrapped around the hard shaft wanting nothing more than to give Justin pleasure. Then his hand was covered with the warm jizz. He groaned as Justin’s walls sucked the juices out of him.  
  
“Well,” Justin said as they separated from each other after a while. “I think this kind of talk should be done more often. That way I’ll become an expert on the matter.”  
  
Brian laughed as he tied the condom and then threw it on the trash. He turned to the blond and pulled him closer. His hands roamed Justin’s body. “Divine,” he whispered suddenly.  
  
Justin stared at him, his eyes shinning with love for Brian. Brian could see that, it was Justin’s message to him.   
  
“You know,” Brian said. “I always thought that people in love were fucking crazy. Always wanting each other and wanting to do everything together. How fucking boring.”  
  
Justin smirked and listened to Brian. He moved closer and kissed the man’s neck.  
  
“They would wake up together and have to see each other in the morning. Then they would go to work or whatever. To then call each other fifty times a day. I thought, fuck I would fucking hang myself if someone called me so many times. Hearing about so much love always made me want to puke,” Brian said as he extended his arms to grab a cigarette. He lighted one up before he continued.  
  
“And now?” Justin asked taking Brian’s cigarette and sucking on it.  
  
“Now,” Brian muttered and grabbed the cigarette once again. “Now, I think I’m fucking insane. I always want you here so we could do stuff together. Mainly fuck,” Brian stated. “Or fuck others...together.”  
  
Justin was chuckling as he listened to Brian.   
  
“I want to wake up with you so I can suck you or you can do me. And when I’m at work I want to call you like fifty times a day until you want to hang yourself,” Brian informed him and grinned.  
  
Justin laughed out loud. He thought the brunet was hilarious. He looked at Brian and smirked. “You so love me.”  
  
“Don’t say that. Love still wants to make me puke,” Brian said and smiled.  
  
Justin laughed his heart out and got on top of Brian. “We’ll be different than all those couples.”  
  
“For once we’re way hotter,” Brian muttered as he started planting kisses all over Justin’s jaw. He crushed the cigarette on the red ashtray.  
  
“And we know the subtle difference between love and sex,” Justin whispered.  
  
“Right,” Brian replied. “Let’s have crazy wild sex now,” the brunet said as he turned them around so he was on top.  
  
“With a pinch of love,” Justin whispered in Brian’s ear.   
  
“Just a tiny pinch,” Brian responded before he attacked Justin’s mouth. “We don’t want me to get nauseous.”  
  
Justin laughed and kissed the brunet. He had never been so happy in his life and the brunet was having similar thoughts. 


	17. Too Much Of Something That I Can't Control

  
Author's notes: In chapter 12 of this story Brian and Justin played around a bit with the master/slave stuff where Brian was the one in charge. Then it was Justin but I didn’t really give you guys anything. So here it is…Justin being in charge. Hope you like it.  


* * *

_Could you make a suggestion  
for an act I would enjoy_

Justin went into the diner with a big smile before he sat down at the booth with the boys. He kissed Brian on the lips before he called out to Debbie. When she came she pinched on the cheek and asked for what he wanted.

“That would be all honey?” Debbie asked.

“Yes,” Justin told her smiling.

“I’ll bring it in a minute, Sunshine,” Debbie told him.

Brian smirked and kissed Justin’s neck. “Sunshine,” he whispered. “Mmm, I want to have Sunshine.”

Justin laughed and pushed Brian off of him. “Behave,” he told the brunet.

“So what are you two doing?” Emmett asked.

“When?” Justin asked and grabbed Brian’s juice.

“Today,” Emmett said.

“What is so special about today?” Justin asked; he took a sip and put it back.

“Look around,” Ted pointed to Justin.

“What do you mean you guys?” Brian asked frowning when he realized the question had been for the both of them.

Justin looked around and then back at Ted. “What do you want me to do about it? This place has no hope to ever be a normal establishment,” he said referring to the decorations.

“But this is a special day,” Emmett told them.

“And?” Justin asked very slowly.

“Jesus Christ!” Ted said. “Do we need to spell it out?”

“It’s Valentine’s Day,” Emmett told them.

“And?” Justin asked again.

Brian smirked.

“Aren’t you going to do something special?” Emmett asked.

“I’m going to fuck,” Justin said. “I am meeting someone later for that.”

Ted shook his head. “I can’t see how you guys are this way.”

Justin looked at Brian and then back at Ted. “Our parents gave us their good genes and we came out so hot and gorgeous,” Justin replied. “Sorry you didn’t have the same luck.”

Brian chuckled.

“Here you go honey,” Debbie said and smiled. “Enjoy it.”

“I will,” Justin told her and quickly started eating.

“Hello,” Michael said as he came next to them. He hated the fact that Justin was there. He sat down with Emmett and Ted.

“Hey Mikey,” Brian said.

Michael smiled from ear to ear. “Happy Valentine’s Day guys.”

“Thanks,” Emmett said smiling. “I wish I had plans with someone.”

“So it’s off to Babylon,” Justin said and laughed.

“Something like that,” Emmett said.

“David and I are going to dinner,” Michael said looking at Justin. “It’s gong to be so romantic.”

Justin nodded. “That’s good Mikey. Glad you two could work things out.”

“I’m sorry that Brian doesn’t believe it those things,” Michael drawled. “I guess he hasn’t found anyone worth trying for.”

Brian glared daggers at the man. Emmett opened his mouth in shock. Ted held his breath because if he had learned something from Justin was that he could never stay quiet.

“Too bad,” Justin said. “If you found someone like Michael says you could take him out on such a wonderful day,” the blond pointed out.

Michael was taken aback briefly. “What? What do you mean take someone?

“What would be the point of Brian trying to do something special on Valentine’s Day if he didn’t have someone?” Justin asked. “I think it would be really depressing to go alone.”

“He would have gone with you,” Michael said raising his voice. “If you meant anything to him, that is.”

Brian glared at his friend yet again. He wondered why Michael couldn’t just shut up.

“Me?” Justin asked. “No way. I have plans.”

“What?” Michael asked. “What do you mean you have plans?”

“He’s fucking some guy,” Ted added.

“He’s hot,” Justin announced.

“Otherwise you wouldn’t be losing your time,” Brian said smiling.

“You know me so well,” Justin said and kissed him. Then he finished his meal.

Michael glared.

“It’s just as well,” Brian said. “I would only participate in Valentine’s Day if it was something fun like an orgy.”

Ted laughed and shook his head. “Leave it to you to turn things around.”

Justin smiled and took what Brian said to heart. “I have to go,” he said getting up.

“Just be careful,” Emmett told him.

“Will do,” he said. “You guys have a good time; you too Michael. I’m sure you would have a romantic evening. What could be better than to do what you want with the person you want the most in the whole world?” he grinned before he left.

“That’s a slap in the face,” Emmett whispered to Ted.

“No shit,” Ted muttered back.

When Justin was finally outside he could have laughed his ass off. Michael was so easy to get. He walked to his Jeep and drove off. He did a few errands during the day and then went to meet the guy he was going to fuck. When he got to the guy’s apartment he could have laughed. The man had prepared the room with white and red candles.

The blond fucked him three times before he went and took a shower, got dressed and left. He was going home to get a few things when his cell phone ran. He smiled seeing that it was Brian. So he answered and they agreed to see each other. When Justin arrived at the loft about two hours later Brian was coming out of the bedroom. He only had a pair of faded black jeans on.

“Hey stud,” Justin said smiling.

“How was he?” Brian asked.

“Good,” Justin said and kissed Brian. He pulled back and knew that Brian had been with someone as well. “How was yours?”

Brian laughed. “I’m going to go take a shower. Can you order us something?”

Justin nodded. When Brian left he busied himself on doing just that. Then he took off his clothes and joined Brian on the shower.

“Mmm,” Brian moaned as Justin kissed his back.

They fooled around for a while until Brian ordered Justin to get on the bed. Justin didn’t even bother drying up. He just was going to get all sweaty anyways.

“God,” Brian groaned as he licked the blond’s chest. “You drive me wild.”

“I know,” Justin said smiling.

They had to stop when the delivery guy came. They ate on the table naked stealing glances at each other. When they were done they went back to the bed. Brian started by kissing the blond’s neck and then moved to his mouth.

“I have something for you,” Brian said as he got on his knees.

Justin arched a brow. “Is it a condom?”

Brian laughed. “No.”

“Mmm,” Justin said. “Did you buy me a dildo? And please tell me it’s not pink,” Justin told him.

“You are such a dork, sometimes,” Brian informed him.

“Hey!” Justin said pushing the man slightly with his foot.

“Hold on a moment,” Brian told him as he got up. He went into his closet and when he came back he put the present in front of Justin.

Justin opened it quickly and started laughing. It was a glass dildo and the handle was in the shape of a heart. “I’m going to fuck you with this.”

Brian arched a brow and laughed. “Are you really?”

“You know you bought it because you wanted to,” Justin told him in a husky voice.

There was a knock on the door and the brunet sighed.

“Just in time,” Justin said. “I have something planned for us. I took your suggestion.”

“You did?” Brian asked. “Wait what did I say?”

Justin smirked as he stood up. He put his present away because that was something he wanted to use only with his man. Then he went to open the door and smiled at Milton and Omar. “Hello boys.”

Omar smirked. “Good too see you squirt.”

“Don’t call me that,” Justin said and pouted.

Brian walked over to them and frowned. “Who are they?” he asked still naked.

Justin walked over to the brunet and smiled. “I’m feeling dirty,” Justin told him.

“And?” Brian asked.

“I hired someone,” Justin informed him.

“What the hell for?” Brian asked. “We can get tricks all the time,” the brunet pointed out.

Justin smirked as he started to kiss the brunet’s neck. “Yes, but…”

Brian closed his eyes and let the blond walk him back towards the bedroom. He gasped when Justin pushed him back in the bed. “What about them, Justin?” he asked when he remembered the two men.

“They are professionals,” Justin explained.

Brian arched a brow. He sat up when he heard footsteps and the guys came inside completely naked.

“That’s Omar,” Justin said nodding with his head.

Brian looked at the tall black guy and right away he knew he was a top. Then he looked at the fair skin man; he thought that the guy was even whiter than Justin if that was possible. Brian was impressed because they were taller than him, at least three or four inches and they looked like they worked out.

“And that’s Milton,” Justin whispered.

Brian didn’t say anything not sure if he was pissed or excited about what was going to happen.

“We’re going to play Brian,” Justin told him.

Brian crossed his arms. “What did you do?”

The blond smirked and Brian felt Goosebumps all over his body. Justin moved away to grab a few things he was going to need. The first thing he did was put Brian’s collar on.

“Justin,” Brian protested.

“You know your safe word,” the blond muttered. “You want to stop it then say it.”

Brian was tempted.

“But good boys don’t disappoint their masters do they?” Justin asked as his hand moved down to the brunet’s cock. The blond pushed Brian back until he got him lying on his back. He kissed Brian slowly and made sure not to make contact with the brunet after that.

“What are you doing?” Brian asked.

“No talking,” Justin said.

Justin grabbed the cock ring and before the brunet could say anything Justin snapped it on.

“Justin,” Brian protested.

Justin turned Brian around and slapped him hard in the ass. “No talking.”

Brian gripped the sheets under him and bit his lower lip.

“You’re going to do what I tell you,” Justin whispered. “It’s been on my mind all day. It’s so dirty.”

Brian groaned knowing how much Justin like dirty. The blond lived for it. It excited him to no end and Brian would let him do whatever. He wanted to please his blond.

Omar smiled as he watched Justin and Brian. He felt Milton’s arms envelope him from behind and kissing him on the back of the neck. “I love you,” he whispered.

“I know,” Milton answered before he let go of him.

“Justin,” Brian moaned when he felt the blond’s teeth scraping his skin.

“Bad boy,” Justin hissed and spanked Brian hard again. “What do you want, Brian?” Justin asked. “Mmm?”

Brian sighed as he felt Justin’s hands rubbing his ass.

“Do you want me to lick your twitching hole?” Justin asked over Brian’s ear and a finger slip between the brunet’s cheeks and he rubbed Brian’s entrance.

The brunet frowned and groaned.

“What do you want?” Justin asked again.

“Fuck me with your tongue,” Brian hissed.

Justin moved back and spanked Brian’s right ass cheek and then the left. “Bad boys don’t get what they want!”

The brunet could hit himself for being so stupid. He forgot he wasn’t supposed to talk. He smirked knowing that he was the one that had started the no talking rule and Justin had liked it and used it a few times. He also knew that Justin was much better playing at it than him.

Milton went outside and brought a chair inside the bedroom. The blond smiled and moved back. He separated Brian’s ass cheeks and bit the inside of one of them. Brian jumped up a bit startled but moaned and pushed back when Justin’s tongue licked around his hole. Justin raised the brunet up to his knees and then started to lick around Brian’s entrance. He stiffened his tongue and pushed inside. He made sure to slick Brian really good.

Brian grunted and beads of sweat started to adorn his forehead.

Justin grabbed the butt plug he had gotten earlier. He used it on his man immediately. Brian growled but didn’t complain when Justin kept licking around him.

“Come here, Brian,” Justin said. “Come on, turn around.”

Brian did slowly and felt the plug stretching him. It was delicious torture.

“Omar’s cock is huge,” Justin said and licked Brian’s neck. “And you’re going to be a good little boy and open up for him.”

Brian grunted.

“Was that a no?” Justin asked.

Brian looked down at the bed.

“You’re going to take it all,” Justin told him.

Brian shook from the blond’s words.

“It’s going to be so hot. You’re going to behave and do what I tell you. That’s what good boys do,” the blond told him. “You’re going to be a good boy for me, right?”

Brian nodded.

“That’s my little whore,” Justin said and grinned.

The older man tried to reach for his lover but Justin pushed him face down on the bed. Justin went and sat on the chair. Brian turned his head to stare at the younger man. He was rock hard and couldn’t wait any longer. He would take anything at that point but he knew he had to wait until he received instructions from the blond. He started thinking of what he was going to do to Justin some other day when the situation was inverted. When the blond was wearing his own collar and he was the one giving out the instructions.

“Get on all fours,” Justin told him.

Brian did and looked back when he felt someone moving. He looked at Omar and his cock twitched as he looked at the tall man fisting his cock. He bit his lower lip and closed his eyes. He was about to get fucked by the man and the thought of Justin getting off on it was doing wonders to him.

“Go ahead,” Justin said smirking. “Fuck him hard and fast. He likes it like that.”

Omar smiled and got behind Brian. He already had a condom in hand. His hands ran over Brian’s ass a few times and he liked the sound that Brian made. He looked at Milton that was currently kneeling in front of Justin. Omar leaned forth and his hands played with Brian’s nipples. His chest rubbed Brian’s back and it stimulated his own nipples a bit. He liked the heat that the brunet’s body was giving him.

“Look at your master,” Omar said in a husky voice. “He’s beautiful.”

Brian looked at Justin getting his cock sucked by the other guy. He grunted and wanted to be the one kneeling in front of Justin.

“You know what he likes,” Omar whispered.

Brian nodded.

“Tell him,” Omar said as he moved Brian around on the bed so that he was in direct view of the younger man. “Tell Mil how to touch him.”

Brian licked his lips and tried to speak but ended up moaning when he felt Omar’s cock rub against his balls while Omar jerked him. He swallowed and tried to remember what he was supposed to do. Then he realized that the man was playing with him, but he had to be stronger than that.

“Go ahead,” Omar said smirking. “You want to get fucked Brian?”

Brian remembered he couldn’t talk. Justin had said so. He bit his lower lip and kept quiet. He felt Omar shaking above him and then heard the laughter.

“He’s good, Justin,” Omar said. “You have a really nice pet.”

Brian frowned.

“Answer him, Brian,” Justin commanded.

Brian swallowed. “Yes,” the brunet muttered.

“Tell my boy what to do then,” Omar whispered as he pulled Brian’s head up so he would look at Milton and Justin.

Brian noticed then that Milton was wearing a collar like he was. He knew how to bring Justin down to his knees.

“He…” Brian said and gasped when he felt Omar’s fingers caressing his hole. “He likes…getting…fucked by my fingers when I suck him.”

Justin growled.

“Do it Milton,” Omar said.

Milton smirked and pushed a finger inside of Justin.

“Mm, fuck,” Justin moaned.

“What else, pet?” Omar asked as he licked behind Brian’s left ear.

Brian groaned and his eyes closed. His hips pushed back into Omar.

“Don’t make me punish you now,” Omar told him. “Talk!”

“He…likes the fingers stretching him,” Brian muttered.

“You heard him boy,” Omar grunted. “Finger fuck Justin.”

Justin’s body arched up as Milton added a second finger and started scissoring them inside of him. He looked at Brian and his pre cum spilled against his lower stomach.

“I want to hear you boy,” Omar grunted.

Brian gripped the sheets under him and tried to stay focused. He squeezed the butt plug inside of him and took a deep breath. “He likes it when…when I rim him.”

“Oh fuck,” Justin moaned when he heard Brian.

“That can be arranged,” Omar said.

Milton pushed Justin’s legs up into his shoulders. Justin grunted and his eyes closed as he felt Milton’s tongue teasing him. He gripped the edge of the chair and buckled against Milton’s tongue. He was going to make Brian pay for that, but still he liked it too much to worry about it then.

“Mmm,” Brian moaned when Omar reached in between his legs and turned on the butt plug on.

“You want my cock up your ass?” Omar asked.

“Tell him…yes,” Justin groaned. “Now Brian!”

Brian nodded slowly because he couldn’t talk. The vibrations running to him were going to make him pass out. He wanted to come so badly and couldn’t.

“I can’t…hear you!” Justin shouted as he gripped Milton by the hair.

“Yes!” Brian hissed. “I want your cock.”

“Convince me, boy,” Omar grunted as he ripped the condom.

The brunet bit his lower lip. “I want it…” he gasped out and his walls gripped the plug inside of him. They were rendering him speechless.

Omar smirked. “I can’t hear you either.”

“I want your…cock,” Brian hissed. “I want it to fuck me! I want it so bad!”

Omar smirked and looked at Justin.

“Fuck him!” Justin yelled. “Fuck him now!”

Omar took off the butt plug and then pushed his hard cock inside the brunet. Brian groaned and his back arched up. He heard something snap behind him and suddenly his body was pulled back by the neck. He knew right away that Omar had snapped a chain to his collar. He gripped the bed as the man started fucking him hard. He turned his head to look at his partner.

Justin had his head thrown back but watching everything under heavy eyelids. His mouth was open and he was gasping for air as Milton rimmed him. “Bri,” he whispered.

“Get him on the bed,” Omar commanded to his own boy.

Milton stood up and picked Justin up. He put the blond on the bed and got in between his legs. Justin opened his eyes and stared at Brian who was looking down on him. Brian moved down and kissed Justin.

“Brian can’t be fucked anymore,” Justin said.

Omar stilled immediately.

Brian whimpered.

“I didn’t tell you to kiss me,” Justin said.

The brunet was going crazy. He wondered how Omar could keep still. He was working his walls around the man and pushing against him. Then Omar grabbed his hips and kept him still.

“No!” Brian yelled.

Omar pulled Brian all the way back to him and grabbed him by the neck. He kept him steady.

“You’re going to watch as other take pleasure but you won’t,” Omar whispered to the brunet. “That’s what you deserve.”

Justin smirked and grabbed the condom that Milton was giving him. He smirked at the brunet as he opened and instead of using it on himself he put it on Milton. Brian growled as he watched Milton preparing the blond.

“Something wrong, boy?” Justin asked.

“Watch him,” Omar instructed as he held Brian back. “He’s amazing isn’t he?”

Brian groaned wanting to cum so bad. His walls kept squeezing the man but that’s all he could do. Then he heard Justin moaning as Milton entered. He was going to punish his blond sooner or later.

Justin moaned as he rotated his hips. “Yeah,” he gasped out.

“Tell us Mil,” Omar said. “How is it?”

“Oh fuck,” Milton hissed. “So fucking good! He’s so tight.”

Justin licked his palm and then started stroking himself. Brian wanted to come so badly but the cock ring wasn’t going to let him. He felt like he was burning and suddenly it was white noise all around him. He watched Justin’s body arching and saw his boyfriend’s mouth opening but he didn’t hear him screaming. Justin looked so tiny in Milton’s arms and Justin was right, Brian thought. It was all so fucking dirty to have another man’s cock up his ass and watch his lover getting fuck by someone else.

“His cock is so big, Brian,” Justin teased the brunet.

Brian grunted.

“So good,” Justin said.

Brian was getting desperate now. He wondered if he should say the safe word but then it would be over. He didn’t want that. He wanted to come.

“Do you want to hear him,” Justin whispered as he looked at the brunet. “He’s going to come deep in me.”

“Oh god,” Brian groaned.

“Fuck me,” Justin moaned. “Fuck my tight hole! Come on. Harder!” the blond yelled. He gripped the man hard inside of him. “Your cock is so good. Oh god…harder…you always wanted to fuck me…didn’t you…oh…fuck…fuck…”

Omar started licking Brian’s neck. Brian gripped one of the man’s arm trying to pull him away or make him move or anything for that matter. His other hand reached for his cock but Omar stopped him.

“Do you like misbehaving?” Omar asked.

“No!” Brian yelled.

Milton moved towards the blond and licked his neck.

“Do you remember when you met me,” Justin hissed. “Remember how I sucked your cock. It was my first time.”

Milton groaned.

“And you came all over my face,” Justin told him. “And then Omar fucked me long and hard.”

Milton growled as he remembered.

“And you wanted to fuck my tight hole but you had been such a bad boy,” Justin whispered. “I was so wet and slick…I was ready to take you…”

The man felt himself at the edge as Justin whispered all those things to him.

“You had to be…spanked…” Justin groaned. “Then I made…better…I rimmed you…remember…I got you ready…for daddy’s cock…and you came…with my tongue…deep in you,” the blond growled.

“Oh fucking shit!” Milton yelled and came deep inside of the blond. He couldn’t believe the blond had such a filthy mouth. The first time he met Justin the boy was only fifteen and didn’t know much. He had never thought one day he would fuck the blond like this. Omar had showed him a lot of things and Justin was turned by each one of them. He hadn’t been surprise in the least when Omar had told him that Justin had called and told him what the blond wanted them to do.

Justin shook under the bigger man and shot his load all over himself. Milton let go and pulled out of the blond. Justin turned around to look at Brian. The brunet had unshed tears.

“Brian?” Justin said.

“I want to cum, Justin, please,” he knew he was begging, but he couldn’t help it.

“Get him on his hands and knees,” Justin instructed as he moved towards them. “Lick me clean Brian.”

Brian did exactly that. His tongue licked Justin’s chest and kept moving down. He didn’t dare kiss the wonderful skin or bite it. He licked it like he was instructed.

“Good boy,” Justin muttered. “Fuck him hard.”

Omar gripped the brunet’s hips hard and pulled almost all the way out before he slammed back into him. Brian’s lower body dropped down on top of Justin. Justin caressed Brian’s neck and side of the face. The brunet’s hot breaths were hitting Justin’s skin over and over again.

“Grip him hard inside of you,” Justin muttered. “Make him cum.”

Brian worked Omar as best as he could. His legs were shaking and he couldn’t take it anymore. Omar groaned and let himself go. He hammered hard into Brian as he climaxed.

“Fucking hell,” Milton who had sat on the chair whispered as he watched them.

“Good boy,” Omar grunted as he pulled out of Brian.

Justin turned Brian on his back. He shoved three fingers inside of the man and took the brunet’s cock in his mouth as he took the cock ring off.

“Motherfucker…shit…kill you…god…” Brian started yelling. “Fuck you!”

Justin moaned as the brunet shot his creamy semen down his throat. Brian arched of the bed and threw his head back. His eyes were closed and saliva was running down his lip. His nails buried themselves deep on the blond’s shoulder.

“Brian,” Justin said when he pulled away. He smirked seeing how Brian laid unmoving with his eyes closed.

“You killed him,” Milton said.

Omar laughed and pulled the blond to him. He kissed him on the cheek. “I’m proud of you.”

Justin beamed at that. He took the chain off of Brian and threw it on the floor. Omar nodded at Milton and the man got up from the chair and went to the living room where he had left his clothes. He pulled a joint from his pants and walked back to the bedroom. He lighted it up and gave it to Omar.

“Bri,” Justin whispered caressing the brunet’s face.

Brian opened his eyes slowly and blinked a few times. He looked around and then back at the blond. He felt raw and vulnerable as Justin lay on top of him. He didn’t know what to say. He hadn’t come that hard in a long time.

“You’ve been such a slut for me, Brian,” Justin said. “I want more.”

“You liked watching me like that?” Brian asked.

Justin smirked. “Do you like it?”

“Don’t ask me that,” Brian told him.

“Answer me,” Justin said licking Brian’s neck. “It made you hard, didn’t it?”

Brian tried to ignore him but in the end nodded. Omar sat on the chair and passed the joint to Milton who took it to Justin. The blond grabbed it and took a long hit from it.

“Come here Milton,” Omar said.

Milton went and kneeled in front of him. Omar grabbed his partner and sat him on his lap before he started kissing him. Justin watched them and smiled.

“Let me have some,” Brian said.

“No,” Justin told him and the smoke that came out of his mouth hit the brunet on the face.

Brian frowned and tried to get up.

“You’re not going anywhere,” Justin told him.

Brian stayed back. He smiled when Justin started licking his neck. He gasped when Justin touched his cock. He was very sensitive but he could feel himself hardening to the touch.

“Get on the bed,” Omar said.

Milton nodded and did. Omar followed him. The blond took one last drag and gave Omar the joint. Omar watched them and whispered on Milton’s ear. His partner nodded and kept on watching Bran and Justin.

“You’re so ready,” Justin said after slipping two fingers inside his man. His cock was half way there. He pinched his nipples and looked to the side at Milton. “Want to fuck, Milton?”

Milton nodded.

“I see the way you’re looking at Brian,” Justin said.

Milton took a deep breath and looked at Omar who only nodded. He was glad that his partner wasn’t angry. He knew how jealous he could get.

“Hands and knees,” Justin muttered to Brian.

Brian’s body ached as he moved. Justin went into their toy chest and smiled when he found what he was looking for. He put that cock ring on himself and walked over to the bed again.

“Want to fuck me?” Justin asked Omar. “For old times sakes?”

Omar smirked.

“Milton is hard,” Justin whispered. “And I want him to fuck Brian while you fuck me.”

“You’re going to scream for me,” Omar said to Justin.

Justin laughed. “You wish.”

Justin watched as Milton put the condom on while Omar worked his fingers inside of him. He didn’t need that. He was ready to take the man. Omar pushed the blond on all fours and prepared himself to enter him.

“Fuck,” Brian moaned when he felt the tip of Milton’s cock teasing him.

“Do it,” Justin said looking at Milton.

The man didn’t wait any longer. He pushed inside Brian hard. Justin groaned as Omar started entering very slowly.

“Mmmm,” Justin groaned. “Yes.”

Milton took hold on Brian’s cock and used the man’s pre cum to jerk him off. Brian grunted and watched as Omar fucked his man. He felt his body trembling.

“You’re so wet,” Milton whispered in Brian’s ear.

Brian groaned and he was glad that this time he didn’t have a cock ring. It all felt fantastic. He was pulled back, flushed against the man’s torso. Then Milton turned Brian’s head to the side and kissed him.

“Don’t!” Justin hissed. “He’s mine you fucker! If you don’t want me punishing you, you will stop!”

Omar smirked as he heard Justin. The boy sure had turned into a man. He had showed him everything he could. “You will get punished for that boy,” he said to his lover.

Milton let go of Brian’s mouth and hid the smirk he had in place. He pushed Brian into his hands and knees again. Omar stopped for a moment and holding on to the younger man’s waist he moved forward. Close enough so that as Brian was in his hands and knees he could suck Justin off.

Justin grinned as Omar whispered his wishes to the blond. “Open your mouth,” Justin said to Brian.

Brian did and the blond pushed his cock hard inside. He grunted and was surprised but adjusted quickly and let Justin fuck his mouth. He loved the delicious taste running down his throat; Justin’s salty taste mixed with the blond’s sweat. He moaned as Milton’s movements became more erratic. His cock was fisted faster and faster and then he was splashing his warm jizz down Milton’s fist. He sucked hard on Justin’s cock until he was pulled away.

Omar was close to coming but didn’t. He pulled out of Justin and took off the condom. Then grabbed two more; giving one to the younger man. Omar grabbed his man and pulled him with him to the chair. Where he sat down and put the other condom on. Then Milton straddled him and started ridding him.

Justin took off the cock ring and made the brunet get on his knees and shoulders. He put the condom on and entered Brian. Brian groaned. He was so sore and he couldn’t keep going. He needed a few minutes.

“Who do you belong to?” Justin asked.

“You!” Brian shouted as Justin bit him on the shoulder.

The blond licked the spot, soothing the tarnish skin before he bit the same place again.

“Justin!” Brian yelled.

Justin started pounding into Brian. He gripped the man’s hips and hammered again and again until he was coming inside the brunet. He pulled back and took off the condom before he dropped next to taller man. He heard Milton groaning and smiled when he saw Omar and his boy fucking. He ignored them and wrapped his arms around Brian. Then he ravished the man’s mouth until he was satisfied.

“Every part of you belongs to me,” Justin growled. “That mouth, your cock and you ass are mine and I do what I want with them.”

Brian held on to the blond. “Yes, master,” he whispered.

“Happy Valentine’s Day,” Justin whispered in Brian’s ear.

Brian grunted with his eyes closed and a few minutes later he was asleep. The next time that Brian opened his eyes he was completely alone. The collar was gone and he was resting in different sheets. He knew that Omar and Milton were strong enough to move him without breaking a sweat so one of the must have while Justin changed the sheets. He sighed contently and smirked as he remembered everything that had happened.

“Jesus Christ Brian,” he chastised himself. “You’re not a fucking schoolgirl stop grinning like a fucking fool.”

He got up and went to take a shower. When he sat down he winced at the pain and then smiled a bit. He grabbed his phone and called Justin.

“Yes lover boy,” Justin answered smiling.

Brian swallowed not sure what he was about to say. “Uh,…where do you know these guys from?”

Justin laughed. “When I was fifteen…I kind of ran away.”

“No shit,” Brian said.

“I met Omar and Milton as they were coming out of a bar…they tried to help me. You know, get me back home or find a place for me to stay. But I didn’t want that and I stayed at their apartment for a few days. Then I went back home.”

Brian listened. “And?”

“I went back to them as much as I could,” Justin said stretching in his own bed. “I wanted Omar to fuck me and teach me things.”

“Jesus,” Brian said. “You took his cock up your ass at that age.”

“Tell me it wasn’t good?” Justin asked. “Did he stretch you really good, Bri?”

Brian closed his eyes.

“Do you still feel him inside of you?” Justin asked.

“I feel you,” Brian said.

Justin smirked. “Good answer.”

Brian sighed. “So I have to thank him for you being so kinky.”

The blond laughed at that. “Like you don’t love it.”

Brian had to admit he did. He was getting more into it each time. He loved it just as much when he was the one in command. He even had bought the blond his own collar and they didn’t use the one that Justin had bought for himself any longer.

“Did you find your present?” Justin asked.

“Wasn’t all that it?” Brian asked frowning as he looked around the bedroom.

“Living room,” Justin said before he hung up.

Brian stood up and groaned feeling the aching. Which only made him think of things yet again and he groaned knowing that it would make him hard for days thinking about it. He pushed his tongue inside his cheek as he stared at the box sitting in the floor right in the middle of the living room. It was a huge black box with a silver ribbon. It looked elegant.

“Presentation is everything,” Brian muttered to himself with a smile.

The man opened the box and his mouth hung open with astonishment.

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” Brian muttered as he looked at the puppies. One was completely black and the other black and golden. Brian called the blond again. “Justin, what are those?”

“German shepherds,” Justin told him. “The black one is yours and the other one is mine.”

“Then why don’t you have it?” Brian asked as he walked back to where the puppies were.

“Because they are brothers and I don’t want to separate them,” Justin said smirking.

Brian rolled his eyes. “I can’t have two dogs, Justin.”

“Sure you can,” Justin said. “I put their bowls under the sink as well as their food. I’ll talk to you later.”

Brian sighed and threw the phone on the sofa. He stared at the puppies who were now whimpering. “I’m not going to pick you up.”

The puppies started fidgeting. The brunet grabbed one of them and sighed as he sat on the floor. When he was little he always wanted one but his father said they couldn’t. Justin knew that and he was sure that’s why he gave them to him. He pulled the other one out and held them close. One managed to lick his neck and he sighed. “Okay, fine, you can stay.”

***

_Some girls can't live without it  
Some girls are born to make you cry_

Brian was glaring at the wall. Then he turned to look at his new pets when he heard one of them yelping. “I don’t like that.”

Justin sighed. “Brian,” the blond groaned. “Whatever you want is fine.”

“I thought you said one of the dogs was yours,” Brian pointed out.

“Yes, but every name I say you turn it down,” the blond pointed out as he looked at his watch.

“Okay,” Brian said. “I’m going to name mine Reaper.”

“I like it,” Justin told him. “I’ll name mine Slayer.”

Brian smiled. “I approve.”

Justin rolled his eyes and laughed. Brian loved to hear the blond laughing. He grunted when someone knocked at his door.

“I have to go,” Brian said. “Someone is here.”

“I’ll be by later,” Justin assured him.

“Later,” Brian said and hung up.

The brunet went to the door and opened it. He was surprised to see his parents. “What’s gong on?”

“We came to see you,” Jack explained.

Joan went inside as she pushed the brunet to the side.

“We need to talk,” Jack said.

“No shit,” Brian muttered.

“Is it true?” Joan asked turning to look at her son.

Brian sighed and looked at his father. “You told her.”

Jack nodded slowly.

“It’s true,” Brian said as he looked at his mother with a smile. “I am gay.”

Joan hit him hard on the face. “Don’t you ever say that!”

“Joan,” Jack said sternly.

Brian didn’t know what to do with himself. He had felt like slapping her himself. He took a step back and looked at the floor instead trying to control his rage.

“What the hell are those?” Jack asked when the puppies came from the room down to where Brian was.

“Get him away,” Joan said kicking one of them away from her.

“Don’t you fucking do that,” Brian yelled as he picked Justin’s dog up. He was happy that the puppy was okay.

The brunet grabbed the other dog and took them back to the bedroom. He closed the panels and turned around to look at them.

“Is he here?” Jack asked.

Brian was beyond pissed. “No!”

Joan shook her head. “What happened to you, Brian?”

“I don’t know but I read in books that it’s safe to blame the parents,” Brian told them grinning and shrugged.

“That’s not funny,” Joan yelled. “We taught you better than that,” she informed him. “How could you do this to us?”

“What the fuck do you want?” Brian asked. “Because you’re not going to come into my house and tell me how to live my life. You have no right!”

“I’m your mother!” Joan yelled at him.

“Oh, now you’re my mother?” Brian asked crossing his arms. “How about when Jack got drunk and beat the shit out of me because I forgot to take the trash out? Were you my mother then? How about when he beat me up because I came home late? Or how about the time he beat me up JUST BECAUSE! Where were you then? You surely didn’t act like my mother!”

Joan took a deep breath. “You didn’t want to follow the rules.”

“Don’t give me that fucking crap you bitch!” Brian yelled.

“Hey!” Jack said screaming as well. “Do not talk to your mother like that.”

Brian laughed. “You two so deserve each other.”

“We did what we had to do to control you,” Joan told him.

“Right because beating the shit out of me until I passed out was the best thing to do!” Brian yelled. “I never did anything to deserve that! I don’t think anyone deserves that when you’re just five years old.”

Joan shook her head.

“You know,” Brian said smiling. “I’m happy God made me gay if it means that you guys are going to suffer about it.”

“Don’t say that!” Joan told him. “God doesn’t create creatures like you.”

“I’m here,” Brian told her.

“Your father is dying with cancer,” Joan said. “And you’re breaking his heart.”

“Buy him some alcohol and I’m sure he will be deliriously happy,” Brian shot back. “How about it Jack?”

“I can’t believe you,” Joan grunted as she crossed her arms. “The devil has taken control of you.”

Brian shook his head. “Get out of my fucking loft.”

“Don’t talk to us that way,” Jack told him. “Don’t make me…”

“What?” Brian asked. “Are you going to try and hit me Jack, for old times sakes?”

“You disgust me, Brian,” Joan hissed. “I can’t believe that I carried you for nine months. A monster like you. Your father was right! I should have had an abortion!”

Brian froze for a second or two. He looked at his parents and wondered what else they could do to hurt him like that.

“You didn’t deserve to live,” Joan spat out.

“Shut the fuck up!” Brian hissed. “Get the fuck out of my loft! Now!!”

Jack watched her go and turned to look at Brian. “You should be the one dying and not me.”

Brian grabbed his father by the collar of his shirt and pushed him back hard until he reach the wall. “Jack, don’t you ever come to me for money or anything else you might need. Just die already and let me live in peace.”

Jack pulled away and left quickly.

“Fuckers,” Brian muttered.

He closed the door and leaned his forehead on the cold metal. He closed his eyes but still could see Joan in his face telling him that she would have preferred him dead. He knew his father never wanted him and now he confirmed that his mother felt the same way. He tried to tell himself over and over that he didn’t care. But apparently he was going to need more than that because he didn’t believe it himself.

He pulled back and gasped when he felt something cold run down his face. He touched his face and couldn’t believe he was crying. “Fuck you, Joan!” he screamed in the empty loft. Slowly he sat down on the floor and wrapped his arms around himself. And he felt himself transported to his old room. He was a kid and he was alone in the dark crying because his parents didn’t want him, never did; never would.

***

_What if the world were a little more perfect  
Would you open your eyes and blink again for me?_

Justin was about to call Brian to see if the brunet wanted to meet when he got a call. He frowned and answered not really recognizing the phone number.

“Justin?” the man asked.

“This is him,” Justin said smiling. “How can I help you?”

“Justin it’s me,” the man told him. “Mr. Chanders.”

“Oh,” Justin said and frowned. “Is everything okay?”

“Daphne was in a car accident with her cousin Alex,” he told the blond.

“What are you talking about?” Justin asked.

“She’s here at the hospital,” Mr. Chanders told him.

“I’m on my way,” Justin said getting up from the chair.

The blond got dressed in seconds and was out of the door like the devil was after him. He got on his car and drove as fast as he could. Once he got to the hospital it took him a few minutes to find them but he did.

“I got here as fast as I could,” Justin said to the Chanders.

“She was in an accident,” he started explaining. “Oh god.”

Justin’s nerves were shot to hell. He wanted to know what had happened.

“The man said that he didn’t see the car,” Mr. Chanders explained. “But he was a fucking drunk.”

Justin covered his mouth. “How are they?”

“Alex didn’t make it,” he told him.

“Oh god,” Justin muttered.

“And…Daphne is still in surgery,” he said.

Justin looked at Daphne’s mom and went and sat with her. He grabbed her hand and she gave her a small smile. Her face had dried tears on. The three of them waited for news of Daphne. Two hours later the doctor came and told them that they could go in and see her. Apparently they had managed to stabilize her.

“Hey baby girl,” Mrs. Chanders said and started crying.

Justin looked at Daphne’s body and didn’t know what to think.

“Oh god,” Mr. Chanders said as he looked at his princess. “It’s going to be okay.”

Justin walked over to her and grabbed her hand. “Hey, Daph. We’re here for you.”

A few minutes later a nurse came inside telling them that they had to go. Justin was the last one to leave. He kissed her on the forehead and her eyes opened briefly before they closed.

“Is she going to be okay?” Justin asked.

“Of course she is,” the nurse said smiling. “She’s a fighter.”

Justin nodded and pulled his cell phone to call the brunet. He needed the man there with him. He took about two steps away from the Chanders when the nurse came running out of the room. Moments later there were people running into Daphne’s room.

“What’s going on?” Mr. Chanders asked as he tried to go inside.

“You can’t sir,” a male nurse said and the door was closed on his face.

Justin stood there for what it felt like decades. Then when the doctor came out Justin just knew. He had lost his best friend.

***

_Let’s take a trip to the stars far away,_  
Where were you when I was down?  
Staring into the dead. 

Justin opened the door to the loft and got inside. The two mutts ran to him and wiggled their tail. They were happy to see Justin. The blond ignored them and kept walking to the bedroom. He found Brian sitting on the bed taking a sip from the bottle of Jack Daniels. The blond grabbed the bottle and drank from it.

“Where the fuck have you been?” Brian asked angry.

“Fuck off,” Justin hissed as he stared at Brian.

Brian pushed him away.

Justin landed on his butt while the bottle smashed on the floor. He looked at Brian and then wrapped his arms around himself. “Fuck you!”

“Guess what?” Brian asked smiling. “Joan and Jack were here.”

Justin kept quiet.

“They were just telling me how great of a son I am,” Brian said and laughed. “Isn’t that fucking great?” he asked sarcastically. “So, how was your day?”

“Daphne is dead,” Justin muttered.

Brian didn’t move a muscle. “What?”

“Daphne is dead. She died. They fucking told me she was going to make it! But she’s dead!” Justin buried his head on his knees.

Brian slid off the bed and crawled over to Justin. He didn’t say a word; he just pulled the blond into his arms.

Justin pushed him away. “I fucking hate this!”

Brian wasn’t sure what the blond was talking about. He followed the blond to the bathroom where he found Justin sniffing something. “What is that?”

“Do you want some?” Justin asked.

“No,” Brian told him.

“Then it’s none of your fucking business,” Justin shouted.

Brian licked his lips. “Give me some then.”

Justin arched a brow and came closer to Brian. He put the coke in the back of his hand and offered to Brian. The brunet sniffed it and groaned.

“Fucking shit, Justin,” Brian hissed and sniffed again.

Justin pushed him back and kissed Brian hard.

“Who gave you this?” Brian asked as he pulled back.

“Does it matter?” Justin asked.

“Tell me you know the person,” Brian shouted.

“Yes,” Justin yelled and exited the bathroom. He started looking in Brian’s stash.

Brian followed the blond and pulled him away. “That’s my stuff.”

“You greedy bastard,” Justin told him. “Give me a cigarette.”

Brain put his drugs away and reached for his cigarettes. Justin left the bedroom and came back with a bottle of whiskey. They shared the bottle and the cigarettes too.

“You feel good,” Justin said to the brunet after a while when he started touching Brian.

Brian turned him around and kissed him hard. They kept turning around until they fell off the bed and they laughed about it.

“You’re a dork,” Brian told him as he licked Justin’s neck.

“So are you,” Justin said as he pushed his hips up into Brian.

The two puppies went inside the bedroom and licked Brian’s neck but Brian pushed them away and kept on kissing Justin. Everything felt so good. Justin turned him around and got rid of his shirt. The blond’s tongue was so warm and delicious on his skin.

Brian looked at his pets and laughed as Reaper managed to push Slayer into his back and started biting his brother’s ear. Justin looked at them and sighed. He threw himself on top of Brian and smirked. Then he proceeded to bite Brian’s earlobe.

“Fuck,” Brian moaned.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard,” Justin told him.

“Justin,” Brian hissed and pushed the blond away. He looked down to see that Slayer was biting his ankle playfully. “Your dog is attacking me!”

Justin looked down to see that Slayer was biting Brian’s jeans frantically. He laughed and looked at the brunet. “He only wants to help me get you naked.”

Brian got up and moved to the bed. Justin followed him. Brian laid back and let the blond get him naked. He didn’t do much as Justin started kissing him everywhere. He wrapped his legs around the blond and Justin pushed inside of him.

“Does it feel good?” Justin asked.

Brian grunted. He didn’t even felt the pain just pleasure. It was so good and so warm. His heart was going so fast but he didn’t care about that. He closed his eyes and felt like he was in a dream. Everything just kept happening so fast and it was so perfect. He forgot everything that was bothering him. Justin was practically in the same place.

Justin moved fast as he took what he wanted from Brian. When they were done he pulled away and got on his back next to the brunet. He closed his eyes and the world faded away.

Brian got up and went to the bathroom. He finished jerking off while he was under the cold water. He was burning up. When he was done he wrapped a towel around himself and walked to the living room. He sat down in the sofa and stared at the wall.

Hours later when Justin woke up he groaned with as he felt pain all over his body. He looked at the alarm clock and it was four in the morning. “Fuck me,” he said and got up. He went to the bathroom and saw that his neck and chest were bruised. He had bites and hickeys all over. “Fuck Brian!” he exited the bathroom and found the brunet sleeping on the floor with Slayer and Reaper on top of him. “Brian!”

Brian gasped and opened his eyes. “What the fuck do you want?”

“Look at what you did,” Justin said grabbing the dogs and putting them on the floor.

Slayer got up and walked way to do some more exploring.

“What the fuck?!” Brian hissed as he sat up. “Fucking hell, Justin!”

“What?” Justin asked sitting on the sofa. “God my head hurts.”

“You fucked me!” Brian told him.

“So?” Justin asked as he threw his head back.

Brian sat on the sofa and laid his head on Justin’s laps. “It…”

“What?” Justin asked. When Brian didn’t answer he opened his eyes and caressed Brian’s back. “Brian?”

“I’m fucking sore,” Brian growled.

The blond sighed and got up to inspect the brunet. “Fuck!”

“What?” Brian asked.

“It doesn’t look good,” Justin said. “I think you bled.”

Brian groaned when Justin’s touched him.

“I’ll be right back,” Justin told him.

The blond sat in the bed for a while and then moved to get some cream for the brunet. When he grabbed it he looked at the bed and he got some images of him fucking Brian. He sighed when he saw blood on the sheets. It wasn’t much but still Justin felt horrible. He groaned and went over to his man. He set out to apply the cream on Brian and flinched every time Brian groaned.

“I’m sorry,” Justin whispered.

“Sorry is bullshit,” Brian muttered.

Justin rolled his eyes. When he was done he got up. “I…I’m so fucking hungry.”

Brian snorted and heard Justin looking for food in the kitchen. He stayed there and his eyes closed before he fell asleep again. When he came back to the land of the living he heard Justin arguing with someone from the bedroom. He got up and walked towards the blond. He saw that Justin had changed the covers.

“I don’t fucking care about that!” Justin hissed. “God, he’s going to hate me, Omar!”

“Who are you talking to?” Brian asked.

Justin hung up the phone. “No one.”

“Right,” Brian hissed.

Justin got up and grabbed the sheets from the floor. “I’m throwing this away.”

“Why?” Brian asked.

“They had blood on them,” Justin said and stopped. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t hate you,” Brian assured him. “We both knew what we were doing.”

Justin turned around to leave but stopped. He came closer to Brian and sighed. “We have to go get tested.”

“Why?” Brian asked.

“I forgot the condom,” Justin whispered.

Brian sighed. “Jesus fuck, Justin!” Brian yelled.

“It’s not like you remembered!” Justin shouted.

Brian punched him on the face and Justin dropped the sheets but was able to keep standing. He shook his head and left the loft. Brian sat down on the bed and winced. He was mad as hell. He couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid.

***

_It's time to forget about the past to wash away what happened last  
Hide behind an empty face, don't ask too much_

Justin looked at his food and then pushed it away. He didn’t even know what the fuck he was doing at the diner. He thought it would be a good idea to go out. He grabbed his cell phone and his fingers brushes past the numbers. He wanted to call Brian but he wouldn’t.

“Where is Brian?” Emmett said sitting in the booth.

“I didn’t say you could sit down,” Justin said.

“You’re so fucking rude,” Michael said standing up.

Emmett sighed. “Honey what’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong,” Justin hissed.

“Right,” Emmett said.

“Where is Brian?” Michael asked.

“What the fuck do you care?” Justin asked him leaning back and staring daggers at the man.

“Maybe we should go,” Emmett said getting up.

Michael arched a brow. “I haven’t seen him.”

“And that’s my problem how?” Justin asked.

Michael was growing angrier. He had tried calling his friend a hundred times and Brian wasn’t answering. And he couldn’t get in the loft because he didn’t have his key. “I need my key back.”

“You’re going to have to take it from my cold dead hands,” Justin told him and smiled at the man.

“You’re a fucking asshole!” Michael shouted. “You stole it fro me. It’s my key!”

Justin shrugged as he got up.

“You’re not going anywhere!” the angry man yelled.

“Fuck off!” Justin shouted.

“Guys,” Emmett said getting in the middle. “No need to scream at each other.”

“Michael,” Justin snapped. “I’m not in the mood to deal with you right now. So go bother someone else!”

“I can do whatever the fuck I want,” Michael said.

“Stay away from me!” Justin yelled

“What is going on?” Debbie shouted at them.

“Fuck,” Justin hissed as he rubbed his face. “This is the last thing I need.”

“Guys!” Someone came inside the diner. “You’re not going to guess what I just saw! Brian Kinney! He was…out there and he was…with two freaking dogs.”

“What do you mean?” Michael asked.

“Ugly guys have rights too you know,” someone said.

Justin laughed at that and turned around to leave.

“Puppies!” the guy shouted. “I just saw him crossing the street!”

Michael rushed past Justin and was out and looking for Brian like a mad man. When he saw his friend at the other side he ran to him. Emmett walked with Justin in the same direction that Michael had taken off.

“Oh my god it’s true,” Emmett said. “He lost his mind.”

“Shut up,” Justin hissed. “I gave them to him. And if you say anything that would want Brian get rid of them I would choke you to death!”

“Fine,” Emmett said. “No need to get psycho on me. But you know Michael is…”

“I don’t care what Michael is going to say,” Justin hissed. “He doesn’t mean anything to Brian.”

Emmett bit his lower lip and wondered what was up with the blond. He had never seen this side of Justin and it was scaring him.

“But you can’t Brian!” Michael hissed.

Brian rolled his eyes.

“What’s going on?” Emmett asked.

“This asshole gave Brian two fucking dogs!” Michael shouted.

“Do we have to do this here?” Justin asked.

“Brian he has my key,” Michael whined.

“Shut the fuck up, Michael!” Justin yelled. “You’re acting like you’re fucking five.”

“You don’t tell me what to do!” Michael said getting on Justin’s face.

Justin punched the man right on the face without thinking about it. Brian grabbed Michael before the man fell to the floor.

“What the fuck, Justin?” Brian asked angered as he grabbed Justin by the collar of his shirt.

Justin glared at the man. “I told him to just fuck off!”

Emmett had his mouth hanging open in shock. He looked at the people that were coming to stare at them.

“Give him his fucking dogs and let’s get out of here,” Michael said as he caressed his face. His nose was dripping with blood. “You’re such a fucking asshole!”

Brian swallowed as he stared at the blond. He let go of the blond and took a step back. He clenched and unclenched his fists.

“Okay,” Emmett said. “Let’s go Michael. Are you coming Brian?”

“In a minute,” Brian said.

Justin looked away when Brian stood right in his face.

“I told you to never touch Michael,” he hissed.

“So what are you going to do, Brian?” Justin asked. “Are you going to spank me for being such a bad boy?”

Brian frowned. Not sure what he was going to do. “How about if you stay out of my fucking life?”

“Give me my dog,” Justin said.

“What?” Brian asked.

“Give me Slayer,” Justin told him.

“Fuck off,” Brian said. “I’m not giving him to you. You’ll probably kill him or something.”

Justin arched a brow.

“You’re…you’re in this fucking mood and its pissing me off,” Brian growled. “So fuck off and when you cool down…”

“What?” Justin asked. “We can talk then? You told me to keep away from you and I will keep away from you. Don’t want to fuck up your wonderful existence.”

The brunet shook his head. “That would be fucking perfect,” he told him.

“Yes,” Justin said. “Go run to your friend. You should fuck him to make him feel better. Poor little Mikey needs his best friend to cuddle him! Run to him.”

Brian knew exactly what the problem was. He squared his shoulders and didn’t know what to say. What was he supposed to say? Sorry your best friend is dead? Don’t worry it will get better? Not fucking likely. So he decided to leave.

“Don’t come running back to me,” Justin told him.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” Brian growled never turning back to look at Justin.

“Wait a minute,” Justin hissed as he followed the brunet. “Are you going to give me my dog?”

“No,” Brian told him.

Justin’s lips formed a thin line. “Did you get tested?”

Brian stopped walking and stared before he nodded slowly. “Did you?”

“Sure,” Justin said and his jaw moved from side to side.

Brian knew that meant Justin was really pissed off. He knew there weren’t going to be any apologies or anything like that. He moved closer to Justin and the blond shook his head.

“Don’t touch me,” Justin told him.

“I wasn’t going to,” Brian assured him.

Justin looked down at the puppies that were trying to keep on walking.

Brian stared hard at the blond. “So how are you handling…”

“I’m fucking fine Brian,” Justin told him and no emotion came from his face or his words.

Brian knew how Justin got when he asked questions that dealt with feelings. He smirked knowing that they were so alike. So he let it go. He knew that Justin had too much anger bottled up and sooner or later it was going to blow over.

“Have a nice life, Brian,” Justin said.

“I always do,” he said.

Justin gave Brian one last look before he walked away.


	18. Always Find My Way Back To You

  
Author's notes: I’m posting this because A said she wanted it, so here it is babe. Thanks Helen for helping me so much. Thanks to Sarah for keeping me awake. I could have been seriously injured…he he. Thanks to Kami for knowing the right words. Hope you guys enjoy.   


* * *

_It’s amazing, how you make your face just like a wall  
How you take your heart and turn it off_

Brian groaned as he shot his load on the trick’s mouth. He looked down and smirked. “Nice mouth,” he said.

The trick looked up and smiled. “I want you to fuck me.”

“I will,” Brian told him as he grabbed his cock and tucked it back in his pants. “Let’s go.”

The trick smiled and got up. He was so fucking hard but he could wait. He was one of the lucky few that got to go with Brian to his loft. He couldn’t wait.

They made it out of the backroom and out of Babylon. Brian drove them to his loft and in no time they were in his bedroom throwing clothes in every direction.

“Do you want to sit on my cock?” Brian asked and smirked.

The trick moaned. “Jesus fuck, yes!”

Brian grabbed a condom as he laid back and put it on. Then he lubed his hard cock and waited for the man to straddle him.

“You’re going to ride me good,” Brian groaned in a husky voice.

At that point the trick only nodded because he didn’t trust his voice. He lowered himself into Brian’s shaft and they both moaned. He loved how Brian’s cock was filling him up. Half way through their fuck they changed positions; with Brian on top fucking him hard and fast. After that they fucked once more before Brian was ready to throw the guy out.

“Time to go,” Brian told him.

The trick wasn’t even surprised; he had expected it sooner.

Brian frowned when he heard his cell phone ringing. He answered with a harsh ‘what’.

“Brian its Reggie,” the man said. “Your boyfriend is here and he’s fighting with some poor guy.”

“What the fuck do you expect me to do about it?” Brian asked. “And he’s not my fucking boyfriend.”

“Look either you come for him or I’m going to call the fucking cops on him,” Reggie informed him.

Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. “Call the fucking cops then,” he hissed and hung up.

“Is everything okay?” the trick asked as he put his pants on.

“Everything is fucking peachy,” Brian told him. “The faster you get dressed the faster you can leave.”

The trick frowned and finished getting dressed. Brian was standing by the door as he watched the man exit his loft. The trick turned around to address Brian but the brunet quickly closed the door before the guy could speak to him. Then he walked to the bathroom to take a shower.

When he came out he went to the kitchen and got a beer before he set the alarm on the loft. Then he sat on the sofa and turned on the TV. He put some movie that looked half interesting. Half way through it his cell phone started ringing again. He groaned and went to answer it.

“Who the fuck is this?” Brian asked because he didn’t recognize the number.

“I need you to come pick me up,” Justin told him.

Brian shook his head. “I’m all ready to be tucked away, Sunshine. No can do.”

The blond licked his bloody lip. “I need money.”

“What?” Brian asked. “You’re calling me at…” he looked at his watch. “…one in the morning because you ran out of money to buy booze. Work it and get someone to buy you a fucking drink.”

“I’m not at Woody’s,” Justin told him. “I’m in jail.”

Brian rubbed his lips with his index finger and smiled. “You don’t say.”

“I wouldn’t have called you…” Justin hissed. “But I don’t have anyone else.”

Brian gripped the phone. “Fine,” he said and hung up.

The brunet got dressed while muttering something about guilt trips and annoying blonds. He grabbed some money he had at the loft for emergencies and made a trip to the ATM just in case. An hour an a half later he and Justin were walking out of the police station. Luckily Justin had been put in jail so that he would sober up and since Brian came and offered to take him home they let him go with a warning. All because Brian knew one of the arresting officers.

“Drive me home,” Justin said.

“Get in the car,” Brian grunted.

Brian and Justin arrived at the blond’s building and the brunet killed the engine.

“You have to stop this shit,” Brian told him. “I won’t always be there.”

“Don’t worry about that,” Justin spat out. “I’ve figure that out by now. Come on so I can give you your fucking money.”

Brian got out but it wasn’t because of the money. He was angry. So he didn't tell the blond that it hadn't cost him anything. “I didn’t do shit to you, Justin. So stop acting like I’m your fucking enemy.”

Justin ignored Brian’s words and they went to his apartment. Brian frowned when he saw Justin looking all over the place.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Brian asked. “Are you looking for your stash?”

Justin walked away to the bedroom and came back with Brian’s money. There were about three hundreds bucks in his hand. “Here is your goddamn money. You can leave Brian.”

Brian slapped Justin’s hand away and the money fell on the floor. “Don’t give me that crap.”

Justin glared at him.

“What happened to staying out of my life?” the brunet asked. “Who came running back to whom?”

“Actually I just called,” Justin told him. “You did the running.”

“Fuck you!” Brian hissed.

“I should have spent the fucking night in jail. I knew I shouldn’t have called you,” Justin yelled. “Only you would turn this around and make it about you.”

Brian actually saw him self choking Justin to death. He step back and glared at the blond. “Fuck this,” he said. “It’s late and I’m tired.”

“Do you want your money or not?” Justin asked.

“Keep it Justin,” Brian told him. “And the next time…spend the night in jail.”

The blond looked at the floor and nodded. Brian really didn’t mean it. He stared at Justin wondering who the blond was going to call if he needed someone and the answer was simple. There was no one. There was no way that Justin was going to call his parents to see him drunk or high.

“And if you end up calling try not to be such an asshole,” Brian said.

Justin ran a hand through his hair. “Shut up,” he said but he grinned.

The older man moved closer. “How are you?”

Justin frowned and then his face changed completely. “I’m fucking perfect,” he said. “Don’t you have to get going?”

“You’re incredible,” Brian told him. He couldn’t believe how good Justin could pretend that everything was fine. The guy had just been in a bar fight, gotten thrown in jail all because he’d been getting drunk to forget about Daphne, yet he could stand in front of him and lie perfectly.

“Just go,” Justin said.

“If that’s what you want,” Brian told him.

Justin muttered something before he turned around and left for his room.

“Jesus,” Brian muttered as he walked to the door.

He was so angry at Justin for acting like a complete asshole. That was his job, he though. He pushed the blond to the back of his head before he drove home. He would go to bed and pretend like Justin Taylor didn’t exist.

***

_You will fly and you will crawl  
God knows even angels fall_

Brian came out of the backroom and headed for the bar. He threw his arm around Michael’s shoulder and smiled.

“You’re having a good time,” his friend said.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Brian asked him.

“Because he’s moping around,” Michael said nodding towards the blond. “Did you guys split up?”

The brunet sighed and shook his head. “We had nothing so there is no splitting up of sorts.”

Michael smiled. “Can I have another copy of your keys?”

Brian sighed. “I’ll ask Justin for them later.”

“Do it now,” Michael said. “Please.”

“Fine,” the brunet said. “I’ll be right back.”

Brian took Michael’s beer and walked over to where Justin was nursing a drink. He unconsciously licked his lips as he looked at the man. Justin was wearing a pair of black, leather pants with his boots and a white and black shirt with only the three buttons at the bottom done. His hair was styled back but a strand managed to make it into Justin’s face. He was wearing a necklace that could very much so double as a collar.

“Slayer is getting bigger,” Brian said smirking as he stood next to the younger man.

“Fuck you,” Justin said. “You kidnapped my dog.”

“Tell it to the authorities,” the brunet told him smirking.

Justin chuckled. “Like they are any help, you dognapper.”

“Aw, your recent brush with the law has made you a cynic,” Brian said smiling.

Justin pulled his drink to his lips and took a sip. “What do you want, Brian?”

“Just to make sure you still can drive home,” Brian said. “So you don’t get in any trouble with the law and end up calling me.”

“How nice of you,” Justin muttered.

“I do have a life,” Brian told him. “I don’t want to have to be dragging you out of jail each time.”

“Brian,” Michael said coming towards them. “What is taking you so long? Did you get my keys?”

Justin smirked as he stepped in front of the man. “Nice shiner,” he said sticking his finger into Michael’s tender flesh.

“Brian!” Michael yelled.

“Justin,” Brian said pulling the blond towards him by the waist. “Leave Mikey alone.”

“Your keys…” Justin said. “Oh, I gave it to a guy to make copies for everyone. Maybe they will get you one.”

“You did what?” Michael asked. “Why would you do that?”

"I was only thinking of Brian," Justin said smiling. "That way they can all line up get comfortable and wait for Brian to come home and fuck them."

Michael arched a brow. Brian wanted to burst out laughing by the look on his best friend's face but he managed to control himself.

“Oh,” Justin said. “That guy!” he said pointing up at the catwalk. “That’s him. He gave me twenty bucks.”

“You can’t do that,” Michael yelled. “Brain, you have to change your locks.”

Brian looked heaven ward and shook his head. Michael took off in the direction of the guy that Justin had pointed to.

“Is he really that intelligent?” Justin asked. “Please tell me he’s just going along with me.”

“You’re a bad boy,” Brian whispered over Justin’s ear.

Justin felt himself getting hard. He turned around and inhaled Brian’s unique scent. “I have to go.”

“You can barely stand,” Brian told him.

Justin laughed. “What are you going to do, Brian? Take me home and tuck me in? Well, now is the time. Maybe you can even feel a cop.”

“Fuck you,” Brian hissed.

“What?” Justin asked holding on to Brian’s arm. “Like you wouldn’t.”

“I’m going to take you home,” Brian said.

“Are you going to fuck me?” Justin asked smiling as he got in his toes and got really close to Brian’s face. “This feels like you want to be in my life," the blond said as he grabbed the man's cock.

“I don’t want to be anywhere in your fucked up life,” Brian told him.

Justin pulled back angered. He sobered somewhat but not completely. “Yeah,” he whispered. Justin himself didn’t want to form part of it.

Brian regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth but he wasn’t going to take them back.

“I…have…” Justin shook his head and didn’t bother explaining himself to the brunet before he walked away.

“Brian,” Michael said. “That guy didn’t know anything about a key. He’s lying.”

Brian turned around and asked for a glass of beam.

“Are you listening to me?” Michael asked. “Where is Justin?”

“He left,” Brian told him.

Michael was happy to hear that. “Do you want to dance?”

“No,” Brian said.

He drank the liquid before he turned around and left. When he got outside he saw Justin standing by his Jeep. He moved closer and saw Justin falling on his knees. He wanted to go help him but he knew he was just going to be pushed away. He sighed and decided to turn away from it all. He couldn’t deal with Justin; he didn’t know how.

Justin fell on his knees and blindly tried to reach for his keys on his jacket. He groaned and put a hand in the Jeep to support himself. He stood up slowly and finally got in the car. He opened the window; feeling the cold slap his face was keeping him awake.

The blond drove fast and it was a miracle he didn’t end up wrapping the Jeep around a pole or hurting anyone on the way. When he got home he walked to the mini bar and didn’t even bother taking a glass. He walked to the bedroom and got in the bed. He managed to take off his jacket with one hand and then his boots.

He grimaced after he took a long swallow from the bottle and moved closer to the night table. He opened the drawer and pulled out two pictures. Then he proceeded to do what he always did. He drank until the faces were a blur and he didn’t remember a thing. He drank until names were a thing of the past and pain wasn’t present in his body; not when he was that intoxicated. Before he lost all consciousness he hoped that it would all be better in the morning because it was getting harder to deal with everything.

***

_Someone turn me around can I start this again?  
Now someone turn us around can we start this again?_

Brian knocked on the door again and waited. He was getting tired of standing outside Justin's door. He looked down at the two German shepherds and sighed. He used the key to the apartment that was still in his possession.

Once inside he took the dogs’ chains off and let them experiment around the apartment. He called the blond a few times wondering where Justin was. The man's Jeep was outside.

“Justin!” Brian yelled as he stood in the living room.

The brunet moved to the kitchen and looked inside the fridge. He frowned not seeing much of anything in there. He closed the door and walked to the bedroom. He opened it and went inside.

“What do you want from me?” Justin asked as he sat with his head against the headboard.

Brian sighed. “Didn’t you hear me calling?”

“I was hoping you would go away,” the blond said as he put his sketchbook down.

Brian scoffed. “That’s just great, Justin.”

“I believe the question was what do you want from me,” the blond told him as he got off the bed.

“I’m going to New York for a few days,” the brunet told him. “I need you to take care of the boys.”

Justin smiled. “You brought them here?”

Brian nodded.

“Okay,” Justin told him. “I’ll do it if I can keep them for a while.”

“Two weeks,” Brian said.

“A month,” the blond said.

Brian sighed and nodded. He moved closer to Justin and grabbed the man by the chin. “What are you on?”

“Leave it alone,” Justin said pulling his head away.

The brunet sighed wondering what would happen to Justin if he kept on the path he was. He knew that Justin would never pull out of it on his own. And he didn’t know if he was strong enough to help the young man.

“Stop thinking,” Justin said smirking. “It’s nothing.”

Brian pulled him closer. “It is something.”

Justin caressed Brian’s chest. “You smell really good.”

The older man arched a brow. When Justin pulled him for a kiss he didn’t fight him. He wrapped his arms around the blond and walked him to the bed. Brian kissed Justin’s neck and they both groaned as their hips aligned themselves.

“Fuck me,” Justin hissed when he pulled his head back.

“Is that what you want?” Brian asked him.

“Yes,” Justin muttered. “Deep inside of me.”

There were so many things that Brian could point out at that moment. The fact that they had said they were through in not so many words was one of them. The last few days they had spend them arguing for stupid things and yet Brian preferred to keep kissing the blond that say anything at all.

“Take everything off,” Justin groaned as he rubbed against the older man. “Fuck me.”

“Where is the lube?” Brian asked as he searched for it.

“Condom,” Justin said.

Once they were naked Brian put the condom on.

“Fuck me like this,” Justin said wrapping his legs around Brian’s hips. “Do it.”

“Like this,” Brian said as he positioned himself at the blond’s entrance.

Justin threw his head back. “Hard and fast.”

Brian entered Justin without lube. “Fuck, you’re so tight.”

Justin shut his eyes and moaned. “Make me feel you.”

“Is this what you want?” Brian asked and bit the blond’s shoulders hard in different spots.

“Yes,” Justin hissed. “Bri,” he whispered. “I can’t feel you.”

The brunet started pounding into the younger man without mercy. The more Justin screamed the more he hurt the blond. He scratched Justin’s perfect skin. He took hard bites out of it. He thrust hard and fast inside his lover.

Brian came deep inside the blond and the smaller man followed him a few seconds after. The brunet moved away as soon as it was over. Justin stayed there staring at the ceiling.

The older man couldn’t believe that he had hurt Justin so much. He had let the younger man’s words get to him. Everything that Justin asked for he gave into.

“You can shower if you want,” Justin muttered.

Brian reached for his pants. “I’ll do it at the loft.”

“Did you bring their food?” Justin asked.

“No, you’re going to have to go out and buy them some or go to the loft to get it,” Brian told him. “Are you listening to me?”

“Yeah,” Justin said and took a deep breath. He reached for his cigarettes but opted for a joint instead so he opened the drawer in the night table where he kept them.

“Are you going to keep doing that?” Brian asked.

“You got to be kidding me,” Justin told him. “You, who probably does it more than me.”

Brian frowned. “That’s not…that’s not the point,” he ended up saying because it was probably true that he smoked more pot than Justin.

“What’s the fucking point, Brian?” Justin asked and scrunched up his face. He wasn’t going to let his emotions get to him and definitely not in front of Brian.

Brian sat at the edge of the bed. He knew that Justin still hadn’t let go. He was holding on to Daphne way too hard. “What do you want?”

Justin thought about it. “I want…I want…”

“What?” Brian asked.

“It’s stupid,” the blond said lighting the joint.

“Tell me anyways,” Brian said.

"Well,” Justin said. “I want to move to a bigger place. I want someone to buy my house in Cali and I want world peace.”

The brunet shook his head and got up to get the rest of his clothes.

“I want the new Jeep that came out and I want you to stop bothering me all the time,” Justin said and smirked.

Brian ignored him.

“And I want…” the blond stopped talking. “I want,” he repeated more somberly this time. “I want to feel something different.”

The brunet turned around and looked at Justin.

“I want impossible things,” Justin said and sat up in the bed.

“What do you want to feel?” Brian asked him.

“Like before,” Justin told him and took a long hit from the joint.

“Before what?” Brian asked.

“Everything,” the blond whispered.

Brian didn’t know what to say to that. He bent down and took his boots. He stared at Justin and didn’t know how he could help. “I’ll come back for the boys later.”

"Right," Justin replied.

Brian took a step towards the man but stopped himself. He walked to the door and stopped, wondering if he should say something. He exited the room and went to see his babies one more time before then left the apartment. He wished things hadn't changed either. He would gladly start from the beginning all over again.

***

_Mama we're all gonna die, Mama we're all gonna die._  
Stop asking me questions, I'd hate to see you cry,  
Mama we're all gonna die. 

Justin opened his eyes and sighed with frustration. Whoever was knocking at his door wasn't leaving. He knew it wasn't Brian because the man was still in New York and if he had come back early he would have used his keys by now.

"Justin," Jennifer said when the blond opened the door. "I've been knocking for an hour. I was going to call the cops."

"Why?" Justin asked as he stepped to the side so she could come inside.

Jennifer sighed as she went inside. “Because,” she said and closed her eyes briefly. “Because I was scared.”

“That I killed myself or something?” Justin asked and smirked. “I have my kids to think about.”

“Your kids?” Jennifer asked taken aback.

“Slayer and Reaper,” Justin said pointed at where the dogs were laying down.

Jennifer shook her head. “I’m serious.”

“So am I,” Justin told her.

“Justin,” Jennifer said and caressed his face. “You need to shave.”

Justin shrugged.

“When was the last time you left this apartment?” Jennifer asked.

“Two days ago,” Justin said. “I had to go buy a few things.”

Jennifer bit her lower lip. “When was the last time you ate?”

“Mom,” Justin said pulling away from her. “What do you want?”

“Are you going to answer me?” she asked crossing her arms.

Justin rolled his eyes and started walking away. She followed her son. She wasn’t going to leave until she knew that Justin was okay, which she doubted.

“You know that your father and I are worried about you,” she told him.

“I bet,” Justin replied.

Jennifer walked to the kitchen and opened the fridge. She frowned not seeing much in there. That’s when she knew that her boy was going through bad stuff. He loved to eat all the time. She sighed and closed the door. She smiled as the dogs came towards her. She let them sniff her and lick her palm before she focus on the blond yet again.

“I could go to the store and get a few things,” she called out to the man.

“I’m fine,” Justin said appearing behind her.

“Justin,” she said sternly. “Why don’t you come and spend a few days with us.”

The blond chuckled. “I’m not a kid.”

“You’re my kid,” she pointed out.

The blond man shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere. I am perfectly fine. Plus I have a few paintings to finish.”

“I heard you’re going to have an exhibition soon,” Jennifer said. “Jasmine told me,” she said having had called the blond’s manager. “That’s good.”

“You mean you’ve been calling her to check up on me,” he hissed.

“I worry about you,” Jennifer said. “Parents are like that no matter how old their kids are.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Justin told her. “My kid died.”

Jennifer’s eyes watered. She took a deep breath and controlled her emotions. She walked over to him and grabbed his face.

“Baby,” she whispered.

“I’m not,” he told her.

“What are you doing to yourself?” Jennifer asked.

Justin laughed and pushed away from his mother. “Don’t touch me.”

Jennifer put a hand to her chest.

“I know you’re hurting because of what happened to Daphne,” she said.

“Shut up! Shut the fuck up!!” Justin hissed.

“I know you’re not okay because of what happened,” Jennifer said knowing it was hard losing people you love. “I know its bringing bad memories too.”

Justin shook his head. “Stop it.”

“I’m trying to help you,” she told him. “I know how much you loved her.”

"She always was there for me mom," Justin said managing to talk without his voice breaking. “And now she’s gone.”

“I’m so sorry, baby,” Jennifer said.

"She left me like he did," Justin told her.

"What?" Jennifer asked surprised.

Justin shook his head. "Alfie left. She left. Everyone leaves me."

Jennifer felt her tears threatening to burst out. She took a deep breath and a step towards her son before she hugged him tightly.

"Maybe I should leave too. Beat everyone to it,” Justin muttered without feeling. "I'm so tired of this bullshit."

“Is that what you want?” Jennifer asked as she started crying. “Do you want to die?”

The blond pulled back and stared at the floor then at his mother. "Don't we all?"

Jennifer put one hand over her heart as the blond walked away from her. She wanted to be able to help him and didn't know where to start. She would do anything for her boy but she didn’t know how to put the pieces back together. Justin needed a lot of help and she knew that if someone offered it her son wouldn't take it and that scared her to death.

***

_Mama we all go to hell, Mama we all go to hell._  
It’s really quite pleasant except for the smell,  
Mama we all go to hell. 

Brian walked slowly into his childhood house. He looked around and stared at the many people there. Instead of staying around and hearing what they had to say he went up to the second floor. He went into his old room and wasn’t surprised a bit to find that it was turned into some kind of storage room.

“Jesus fuck,” he said.

“Brian,” Claire said. “What are you doing up here?”

Brian sighed. “Reminiscing?”

“It’s so awful,” she said. “Daddy’s gone.”

“I should cry too,” the brunet told her. “But I bet your tears and mine would be for different reason,” he said and smirked.

“Don’t be an asshole, Brian,” Claire said shaking her head and moving away from him.

The brunet watched her go and leaned against the wall. He thought how it always had been different between him and his sister. His father had always treated Claire like a little princess and he was the spawn from hell. Brian wished that his father couldn’t get to him even after death. He went back down and went to the kitchen where his mother was having a glass of wine.

“There’s always a reason for you to drink, Joan,” he said.

She looked at him crossed. “I didn’t see you at the burial.”

“I was in the back,” Brian told her. “Didn’t want anyone to actually know I’m part of this family.”

“Don’t start,” she told him sternly.

Brian sighed and looked at his mother. “How are you paying for everything?”

“He had a life insurance,” Joan told him.

“That old dog,” Brian muttered.

“He shouldn’t have died,” Joan whispered.

“Don’t tell me,” Brian said and smiled sardonically. “His gay son should have.”

“Don’t speak of that in this house,” Joan told him. “People could hear you.”

Brian stuck his tongue in his cheek. He didn’t know why the hell he’d come in the first place. He’d come back from New York to find that his father was dead and he should have gone out to celebrate it.

“He was a good man,” Joan informed him.

“What about when he hit me all the time?” Brian asked. “Or the fact that he drank like a fish. Better yet, he wanted you to have an abortion.”

Joan frowned. “Don’t start. This day is about your father.”

“I won’t say anything else,” Brian told her. “Oh wait, so that’s the trick, if you don’t talk about your sins, they don’t exist?”

“Stop it already,” Joan said and then took a big gulp from the glass.

“Why?” Brian asked. “Afraid that your friends will find out how this house is full of sinners?” Brian asked.

“You’re the sinner,” Joan hissed. “How can you Brian?”

The brunet smirked. “I do it to make my parents unhappy. I want to pay them back. So, since Jack is already dead I guess you’re the one that’s left.”

The woman shook her head. “You have no respect. You think everything is a game. If you’re not going to behave leave my house. Leave me alone and let your father rest in peace.”

“In peace?” Brian asked and smirked. “Isn’t dear old dad burning in hell right now?”

Joan opened her eyes wide. “Shut up,” she said and looked back towards the living room. “How can you say that?”

“That’s where sinners go, mother,” Brian hissed. “He’s there and I’ll end up there too or so you say. That’s where you’ll end for being such a bad mother.”

“How dare you,” Joan said and slapped him before she moved away.

Brian decided it was time to go.

“I imagine you’re Joan’s son,” Father Tom said. He’d heard the last part of Brian and Joan’s conversation.

When Brian looked at the man he smirked. About two weeks ago he had fucked the man. He wouldn’t believe it if he wasn’t seeing it with his own eyes. “You’re a priest? Fuck me. My mother might be right about all of us. We’re all sinners.”

Tom looked a bit surprised when he realized who Joan’s son was. “You have to be more understanding of people.”

“I really don’t,” Brian told him. “It’s not my job to do so.”

Tom looked towards the direction where Joan had left. “This has been hard on her.”

“Does she know about you?” Brian asked. “I really don’t think so.”

Tom got serious.

“You would be out of a job by now,” Brian said and leaned closer. “Apparently it’s a sin to like other man.”

Tom stepped back. “Brian,” he said.

“What?” the brunet asked smirking. “Don’t worry too much. It’s Joan. It’s a sin to breathe the wrong way in her book.”

Tom knew that Joan was a complicated woman but she had her faith.

“You don’t know her,” Brian said. “Not like I do.”

Tom frowned.

“I know the woman she presents to the world and the one she really is,” Brian muttered. “I’ll see you father Tom.”

“You’re going to come to church?” the father asked.

The brunet smirked. “In hell father.”

“You think you’re going to hell?” Tom asked. “And me? For our actions?”

“By her standards,” Brian said smirking. “You, me and the whole world is going to be burning in flames for all eternity.”

Tom shook his head and watched as the brunet left.

***

_I'm on call, to be there.  
One and all, to be there._

Brian knocked on the door and waited. He smiled when he heard the dogs barking and then the door opened. He got inside before Justin closed the door again.

“So what’s up?” Brian asked.

“What do you mean?” the blond asked.

“You called me,” Brian said.

“You called me,” Justin pointed out.

Brian shrugged. “I was just letting you know that I was back.”

“Okay,” the blond muttered as he went to sit on the sofa.

“So,” Brian said. “When I was in New York I saw some of your work.”

Justin didn’t really care about that. “Yeah,” he muttered.

Brian frowned as he let Slayer sniff him. Reaper had walked back with Justin and lay at his feet. “Why did you call me?”

“I was returning your call,” Justin pointed out yet again.

Brian smirked. “I left a message telling you what I had to say.”

Justin took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Is there something you want?”

The brunet moved slowly and sat across the blond. He stared at the coffee table and leaned back in the sofa. “My dad died.”

Justin looked up. “When?”

“Four days ago,” Brian told him. “His burial was yesterday.”

“Did you go?” Justin asked.

The brunet nodded. “I didn’t stay long.”

Justin stayed quiet. Then out of nowhere he said. “It’s not the same,” he whispered.

“Yeah,” Brian agreed.

Justin could have told Brian all he felt at that moment. He could have said how much he missed his best friend. How Daphne was such a strong person and he didn’t know how much he depended on her. When he had a problem he could tell her and if she wasn’t there he could leave it on the machine. So even if it was a month later she would call and they would talk about it.

The blond could tell Brian how much it hurt because Daphne had been there for him when Alfie died. How she had taken it upon her to be the one to help Justin. How she battled with him every day until he was standing in one piece. He could tell him that if anyone could get him out of his depression or whatever it was it could be Daphne but she wasn’t present.

Brian soaked in the silence. There was so much he needed to say but he wouldn’t. It was just not like him to talk about his feelings. He wanted to tell Justin how it hurt that he didn’t have a better father. How it still killed him what his parents had done to him. How he wanted Jack to be alive so he could scream at him and say horrible things that would make Jack wake up and see what he did.

The brunet wanted to believe that it could have been different. He needed so badly for someone to tell him that it wasn’t him, that it was his parents that had the problem. But he just got up and went to sit next to the younger man. That’s when Reaper got on the sofa and set his head on Justin’s thigh. Brian smiled and scratched behind his ears.

“Hey boy,” Brian said smiling. “They are so big already.”

“I know,” Justin told him. “You know that I got them their food and I bought these disposable cameras at the store. I took some pictures and I did a drawing. I think you’re going to like it. I’ll give it to you.”

Brian smiled at that. “Make sure to sign it,” the brunet said. “When you get really famous I’ll be able to sell it for a lot of money.

Justin smirked and swatted Brian’s chest. “Asshole,” he said playfully.

“Where is Slayer?” Brian asked realizing that the other dog had gone missing.

“I think he’s in my bedroom,” Justin said. “I’ve been trying to keep him off my bed so every opportunity he gets he hops on it.”

The brunet smirked.

Reaper barked and got down.

“Okay then,” Brian said. “I should probably go.”

“Sorry about your father,” Justin said.

Brian kept quiet. He really didn’t have anything to say to that. “I’ll come for the dogs tomorrow if you want.”

“Okay,” the blond whispered.

They stared at each other and both of their eyes reflected the same thing; lust. Brian and Justin both moved towards each other but stopped at the same time. Brian looked to the side while the younger man stared at the floor.

"I have to go paint,” Justin whispered.

Brian nodded. "Yeah, I have to work on a few things too."

Justin got up and started walking towards the door. The brunet followed.

“I’ll see you,” Brian said.

Justin crossed his arms and nodded.

The brunet opened the door and stopped from going out. “Do you remember when I said you should choose jail over me?”

The blond nodded.

“I didn’t mean that,” Brian informed him.

The blond man grinned. "You can call me too," the shorter man said. "If you ever need anything."

Brian grinned and nodded before he walked away. Justin smiled and closed the door to his apartment.

***

_Our lives are made in these small hours, these little wonders,_  
These twists & turns of fate, time falls away,  
But these small hours, these small hours still remain 

"What do you want?" Brian asked.

"I want a salad with mayonnaise," Gus answered.

"What?” Brian asked frowning. “No,” he replied.

Gus pouted and stretched his neck to look at the menu his father was looking at.

“Is the same one you have,” Brian told him.

The four year old boy sighed. “I want a hotdog.”

Brian sighed. “How about if you get the same thing that daddy gets?”

Gus nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah.”

The brunet ended up asking for two turkey sandwiches and let Gus have mayo in his. Their orders arrived soon enough and they started eating. Half way done Gus jumped out of the booth and ran to the door.

Brian was going to go after him but then saw that his son had run over to Justin who had entered the diner. He waited as Justin and Gus made it back to where he was sitting down.

“Hey,” Justin said.

Gus let go of Justin’s hand and sat back where he was. “Are you going to sit with us?”

Justin didn’t know what to answer. He looked at Brian.

“You can sit,” Brian told him.

“I don’t want to interrupt the two of you,” Justin told him.

“Sit down,” Brian insisted.

The blond sat next to the younger brunet. “You’re getting big, Gus.”

Gus smiled and nodded.

“You look so much like your father already,” Justin informed him.

“Do I?” Gus asked looking at his father.

Justin smiled.

“Maybe,” Brian teased him. “You should be so lucky to be as good looking as your father.”

Gus giggled. “Daddy!” he shrieked.

Justin smiled and ordered a plate of fries and a strawberry shake when the waiter came.

“Why haven’t I seen you?” Gus asked as he looked at Justin. “You used to come to nana’s house.”

The blond smiled. The boy was way too smart. “I’ve been busy.”

“Are you busy now?” Gus asked.

The blond laughed and shook his head.

“My daddy likes you,” Gus said.

Justin laughed and looked at Brian. “Does he now?”

The brunet rolled his eyes not sure why Gus was even saying that.

Gus nodded and stuck a piece of bread in his mouth. “He’s always looking at you,” he pointed out.

“Don’t speak with your mouth full,” Brian told him.

Gus swallowed quickly. “Do you like my daddy too?”

The blond laughed. “Yeah, I like him too.”

“You gave him two puppies,” Gus said. “They’re so soft.”

Justin smiled as he listened to the boy. His order came pretty soon and Brian and Gus waited for him. Once they were outside the diner Brian invited the blond to go with them to the museum.

“You have to hold my hand,” Gus said when they entered the place.

“I do?” Justin asked.

“Yes,” Gus said. “Mommy and Momma always do. I always get to be in the middle.”

Justin couldn’t help but smile widely. “Then I guess that’s how it’s going to be.”

Gus was having a ball as they went inside the place. Brian and Justin showed him the two new exhibitions. One was about Indians and the other was about dinosaurs. The boy wouldn’t stop asking questions and Justin and Brian were happy to answer them all.

“Where do you want to go next?” Brian asked.

“I want to go to the park,” Gus said excitedly. “Can we?” he asked.

Brian nodded and picked him up.

“Is Justin coming with us?” Gus asked.

“Yes he is,” Brian said then he looked at the blond.

Justin nodded at that.

“We’re going to make a quick stop though,” Brian said. “We have to check on Reaper and Slayer.”

Gus nodded and hung on to his father’s neck.

“And his Armani collection,” the blond whispered.

“I heard that,” Brian muttered.

The blond smirked and walked next to the brunet. He got on the car with them. He was stealing glances for Brian every few seconds and trying to pretend like he was talking to Gus or making sure that the boy was okay. Brian knew what was going on and he liked the attention especially because it was from Justin.

When they got to the loft Gus had fell asleep. Justin was the one to pick him up and take him upstairs. Brian went inside first to put Slayer and Reaper away because they were always barking when he showed up. He didn’t want them to wake up the little boy.

When it was safe Justin came in and Gus was put in Brian’s bed. Then the two of them sat down on the sofa with the beers that Brian had gotten for them.

“You’re a great father,” Justin said.

Brian stared at Justin. “Thanks,” he said after a few seconds.

The blond nodded and looked away and into the screen of the TV.

“Thanks,” Brian said again. “For spending time with me and Gus.”

“He’s just so adorable,” the blond said.

“So you were on this for him only,” the brunet joked.

“You got me,” Justin said playing along.

Brian wetted his lips and leaned closer. Justin quickly finished his beer. Then he got up from the sofa. He smirked at Brian.

“What?” Brian asked.

“Admit it,” the man said.

“Admit what?” Brian asked arching a brow.

“Don’t play dumb,” Justin told him but wouldn’t say what he wanted Brian to admit.

The brunet had an amused smile on place. “I’m not psychic.”

Justin took two steps closer. He leaned forward and put a hand on the armrest and another on the back of the sofa. Brian threw his head back and Justin moved in closer. Their lips were only centimeters apart.

“You want me,” the blond whispered and then smirked.

“I see,” Brian muttered.

“Is it a lie?” the blond asked playing innocent.

“I want you as much as you want me,” Brian told him.

The blond moved closer but didn’t kiss the man. He only brushed his lips against Brian’s as he spoke. “Then you want me a lot.”

The brunet was more than happy to hear that.

Gus started coughing and Justin moved away. They waited to see if the boy had woken up but it didn’t look that way.

“I should go,” Justin said and cleared his throat. “Don’t be a stranger.”

Brian smirked. He stayed sitting on the sofa as the blond left. Then he threw his head back and sighed. He rearranged his cock in his jeans. He knew that if Gus hadn’t been in the loft Justin and him would have been fucking like animals.

He got up and walked to the bedroom. He smiled as he watched his kid sleeping. He wondered if Gus was going to remember that day. He knew that he wasn’t going to forget it anytime soon. He just loved to spend time with his two favorite boys.


	19. I'm With You

_No, they don't know who I really am_  
And they don't know what I've been through like you do  
And I was made for you. 

As soon as Justin arrived at Babylon he went to the bar. He asked for a beer and drank it slowly. He wasn’t planning on getting drunk; at least not that moment. Then, the one person for who he’d bothered to dress up for, showed up.

“How is it going?” Brian asked, already a drink in his hand. He’d been looking around to see who he was going to take to the backroom when he spotted the blond. He didn’t waste any time and walked over to the man.

“It’s going,” Justin told him.

Brian moved closer to the shorter man. Justin looked down at the opening of the beer and suppressed the smile that was threatening to come out. He knew that Brian wanted him and he wanted the man as well, yet he liked how they danced around the issue.

“Anything good around here?” Justin asked as he turned around with his beer in hand and leaned against the bar.

The brunet did the same. He looked around and sucked his lower lip into his mouth. He moved his head closer to the blond. “Not many guys here worthy of our time,” he muttered before he moved back and finished his drink.

“That’s bad,” Justin told him.

“Is it?” Brian asked.

“I’m so fucking horny,” Justin said calmly.

Brian moved so he was standing in front of the blond. “Are you?” he asked as his hands came to rest at the edge of the bar, the blond in the middle of them.

“Yes,” Justin said and looked down towards his cock.

The older man did the same and when they looked back at each other, their faces showed one thing; lust. Brian let his body move forward so that he was pressing against the younger man. Justin didn’t know if he’d put his beer away or if it had been Brian but he found himself fisting Brian’s hair with both hands as they kissed roughly.

“I want you to fuck me,” Justin said after the kissed was broken.

“Backroom,” the brunet suggested.

“Yes,” Justin told him and grabbed Brian’s hand.

The blond led the way and in seconds the taller man had him pinned against the wall. His pants were pushed down and two cold fingers pushed past his ring of muscles.

“Shit,” the blond gasped. “Brian,” he moaned, not sure how Brian moved so fast.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard,” Brian told him.

The blond grunted and pushed back against the fingers. He moved back and leaned forward, ready to take the man. Brian pulled his hand away. Reached for a condom and put it on as quickly as he could. His cock was rock hard and the only place it wanted to be was deep inside his blond. Because it didn’t matter what had happened; he considered Justin still his.

They both grunted when Brian pushed inside the shorter man. Justin closed his eyes and waited. Brian started licking Justin’s neck and then moved to his earlobe before he nibbled the man’s jaw. Roughly he pulled Justin’s head towards him and he kissed him. He started rocking his hips because he just couldn’t wait any longer. He needed to fuck the man.

“Brian,” Justin gasped the first time the brunet rubbed against his sweet spot.

“Yes,” the man hissed.

“Fuck me,” Justin told him.

Brian groaned as his hands gripped Justin's hips. They started picking up speed.

“Do me," Justin said in a husky voice. "Do me hard, Brian."

So the brunet fucked Justin as hard as he could.

“Fucking shit,” someone that was getting sucked said as he watched them.

Brian bit Justin’s shoulder and pounded into the blond even harder.

“God, I wish he would fuck me like that,” someone muttered.

The blond grunted when Brian’s hand found his way to his cock.

“You love it,” Brian said as he pulled the blond back by the hair. “You’ve always loved my cock.”

Justin really didn’t have to answer so he didn’t. He threw his head back and groaned his pleasure as he started shooting his hot jizz. He gripped Brian as hard as he could inside of him. He grunted when Brian bit him hard. He knew the man did that so he wouldn’t scream. He smiled liking how he knew his man.

The brunet wrapped his arms around the blond as they helped each other keep upright. Their breathing was ragged and they were trying hard to make it normal yet again. When Brian pulled out of the blond he could hear people muttering about the way they had fucked. He knew they would be talking about it for days. Justin turned around and smirked.

“Want to get out of here?” Brian asked. “I’m not done.”

Before Justin could answer, the brunet pulled him close and kissed him hard. They separated needing oxygen. Justin fixed his pants and led the way out of the backroom.

“Let’s get a drink before we go,” Justin said.

Brian shrugged. He didn't care either way. Once at the bar Brian saw his dealer and told Justin he was going to get something before he left the blond alone. Justin didn’t mind it at all. He could use a joint and who better to smoke with him than Brian.

“What the fuck is going on?” Michael asked. “Why are you and Brian all cozy yet again?”

“Why is it any of your business?” Justin asked.

Michael glared.

Emmett sighed sure that Michael and Justin would never get along. The blond took that moment to pop an ecstasy into his mouth.

“It figures,” Michael said. “He’s wasting his time on you.”

Justin rolled his eyes and asked for a drink.

“I hear what they say about you,” Michael said. “How you do drugs like it’s the end of the world.”

“Again, none of your fucking business,” Justin said.

“He’s right Justin,” Emmett said. “Maybe you should slow down.”

“I had a bad experience with crystal meth once,” Ted said. “And…”

“Don’t care,” Justin told him. “Really, not one bit,” he said and drank his shot of beam.

Michael was so pissed. When he’d seen Brian and Justin coming out of the backroom he could have killed the blond. “Yeah, go ahead. Drink until you can’t see straight and have to crawl on the floor.”

Justin smirked and asked for another drink while he ignored Michael.

“You don’t deserve Brian,” Michael hissed.

“Fuck off,” Justin hissed.

“No,” Michael said pushing the blond. “You fuck off!”

“Michael,” Emmett said grabbing Michael by the waist and pulling him back.

Justin glared at the man. Ted got in the middle so that way Justin couldn’t do anything. The blond shook his head. “Since you’re bitching so much about me drinking, here,” he said and managed to throw his drink at Michael. “You can fucking have it.”

“I’m going to kill him!” Michael yelled as he tried to reach for the blond but Emmett was holding him.

“What the fuck is going on here?” Brian asked, not sure why Justin threw his drink at his best friend.

“I’m out of here,” Justin hissed.

Brian didn’t even bother to ask Michael or the guys what was going on. He just kept walking after Justin. He could ask the blond and he knew that no matter how bad it was, Justin would tell him the truth and wouldn’t try to hide it.

“Justin, wait,” Brian said and grabbed the blond by the wrist. “What happened?”

“Outside,” Justin said.

The two of them left Babylon and took Brian’s car.

“So,” Brian said half way to the loft.

“He’s a fucking asshole,” Justin said. “He started saying that I was a fucking junkie and that I drank too much. That I didn’t fucking deserve you and that fucking crap he speaks about. Goddamn, Brian! He fucking pushed me and I wanted to fucking beat the shit out of him!”

“Relax,” Brian told him.

Justin grunted and hit the dash. “Fucking shit! I’m so fucking pissed right now. Why the fuck is it his business?”

“Fuck them,” Brian said as he put a hand on Justin’s thigh. “Fuck them all.”

The blond shook his head before he threw it back against the seat. He closed his eyes and tried to forget about Michael. Then when the car finally stopped, he turned to look at Brian.

“Do you think he’s right?” Justin asked. “Do you think I don’t deserve you?”

Brian leaned closer and kissed him softly. “I wouldn’t be here if you didn’t.”

“You would know,” Justin said. “You know everything about me like no one else. Creepy.”

The brunet laughed at that and leaned towards his man. “It doesn’t matter what they think, Justin. Only what I think and I want to be here with you. So fuck ‘em.”

“Fuck them all,” Justin said smirking and kissed the brunet.

The two of them got out of the Jeep. Then they went into the building hand in hand.

***

_Could you whisper in my ear  
The things you want to feel_

A week later and it looked like Brian and Justin were still celebrating getting back together or whatever the two men would call their reunion.

“What do you want?” Brian asked.

“To feel you,” Justin whispered.

“Where?” Brian caressed Justin’s thighs.

“Everywhere,” Justin pulled his arms up to let Brian do whatever he wanted with him.

“You’re going to have to be more specific than that,” Brian said with a grin.

“Mmmm,” Justin purred. “I want your cock touching me. Deep inside."

Brian didn’t say anything and picked up the condom he had grabbed before. He ripped it open and put it on. He didn’t bother with lube since he’d fucked Justin before and the blond was ready for him.

“Mmm,” the blond grunted as Brian entered him.

“Yes,” Brian hissed and started moving slowly.

Justin closed his eyes and let his hands run over Brian’s damped skin. He could be blind and still he would know Brian’s body better than anyone. When Brian’s pace started to accelerate, Justin’s nails dug into the brunet’s flesh.

The brunet was groaning as he fucked the younger man. His eyes were closed as well and he couldn’t get enough of his lover. His hands gripped Justin’s shoulders and his hips stirred on their own accord. He bent down and kissed the blond. The kiss was hot and wet and it communicated everything they were feeling.

“How do I feel, Jus?” Brian asked. “Good.”

“Brian,” Justin moaned as he tightened his walls around the man.

The older man started jabbing hard and fast inside his blond. Justin shook his head from side to side. He couldn’t think straight anymore.

“Yes,” Brian whispered as he rubbed against Justin’s prostate.

“Oh fuck!” Justin yelled.

The two of them shouted their pleasure as they climaxed. Brian quickly moved away while Justin stayed lying on the bed like he was dead.

“Brian,” the blond muttered.

“What?” Brian asked as he tied the condom.

“Do you want to go out?” Justin asked as he slowly sat up. “Studs n’ Suds at Babylon.”

Brian kept silent.

“Want to go?” Justin asked.

Brian nodded as he got up to take a shower. “I’m not staying long though.”

“Okay,” the blond muttered as he stayed where he was.

When Brian came out he stared at the blond who was smoking a cigarette. He arched a brow and then nodded towards the bathroom. Justin groaned as he got up and put out the cigarette before he went to get a shower. His shower was much longer and when he came out, Brian had picked out his clothes.

“Mmm,” the blond muttered and then smiled. “I’ll look so hot,” he said staring at the leather pants and the black shirt that was bit tight around Justin’s lithe frame.

“I know,” Brian growled from behind.

After they were both dressed they got out of there. Justin drove to Woody’s claiming he needed something to drink. Brian didn’t mind at all. He could use some alcohol himself.

“Look who it is,” Emmett said when he stood next to Brian and Justin.

Brian didn’t bother to look while Justin looked at the man with a bored expression. Emmett was smiling because Justin was wrapped around Brian’s arm tightly.

"Reconciliation time is the best, huh?" Emmett asked smirking.

Ted grinned as he stared at Brian and Justin.

Justin arched a brow. "Take me away from your weird friends, Brian."

"My pleasure," the brunet said pulling the blond towards the pool tables.

Emmett laughed and followed them anyway. They played for a while and then Michael showed up.

“What’s going on?” Michael asked.

“We’re playing pool,” Justin said. “Are you blind?”

Brian wrapped his arm around Justin’s waist before he kissed the blond on the neck. “It’s your turn,” he whispered.

“I don’t know why you bother, Brian,” Michael snarled. “He’s only playing with you. You’re a game to him.”

“God,” the blond sighed. “He doesn’t ever get tired.”

“Let’s not start,” Ted said.

“Right,” Justin said and pushed his pool stick on the table. He walked to his beer, drank from it, put it down and walked away.

Michael smiled at that. “I can play for him.”

Brian walked over to him and pushed his stick into Michael’s chest. “You can play for me too then,” he hissed before he left. By the time Brian got to the car, Justin was about to leave.

“Want to go to Babylon?” Justin asked.

“Nah,” he answered. “Let’s just go home.”

The blond nodded and drove. They both kept silent the whole way. Once they were back on the loft they undressed and got into bed. Brian lay on his back and Justin on his side staring at the man. The blond leaned closer and kissed Brian.

The older man pulled Justin on top of him. Soon enough they were trying to devour each other. Their bodies moved against one another seeking each other’s warmth as well as pleasure. Justin reached for a condom and Brian just stared as the blond put it on. The blond moved in between Brian’s legs with the lube in hand.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed when the blond pushed two fingers into him.

“Yeah,” the man said smirking. “We’re about to.”

Brian lifted one of his legs around Justin’s hip. Justin threw the lube away and lifted Brian’s other leg. He positioned himself and pushed inside his lover. Brian’s body arched up and he didn’t have time to adjust before the blond was slowly moving in and out of him. Their pace was slow and only grunts and moans of pleasure escaped their mouths.

When they couldn’t take it anymore they fucked wildly until they reached the finish line. Justin dropped on top of Brian gasping for air. Brian closed his eyes with a little smile in place as he ran his fingers on Justin’s damp hair.

“You’re perfect,” Justin whispered.

Brian groaned as the blond pulled away. Justin got up and went to the bathroom to get cleaned up. He brought back a cloth and cleaned the brunet who looked like he had fallen asleep. The blond moved away and had a cigarette. When he came back he got on the bed and stared at the man for a long time.

“I always want to feel loved by you,” Justin whispered to his lover.

Brian didn’t answer. He kept on pretending like he was sleeping; the only difference was that a little smile was playing on his lips.

***

_Just let me hold you while you're falling apart  
Just let me hold you and we'll both fall down_

Brian entered Justin’s apartment wondering if the blond was there. He didn’t see the Jeep but Justin sometimes would park around the back of the building. He went to the fridge and got a bottle of beer. He looked at the time and then walked to the bedroom to see if Justin was there. When he didn’t find him there he went to the blond’s studio.

Justin was painting and Brian also knew by his movement that the blond was high. The shorter man was going a mile per minute and didn’t seem like he was going to stop anytime soon.

“Justin,” Brian said, standing next to the blond.

Justin didn’t answer and kept on painting. The brunet grabbed the blond’s arm and Justin pulled away.

“What the fuck do you want?” Justin asked angrily.

Brian stared at his man for a few seconds before he answered. “What the fuck are you on?”

Justin was glaring at the brunet. “When did you get here?”

“Just now,” Brian replied and took a sip from his beer.

The shorter man shook his head and went back to painting. Brian looked heaven ward and left him there. He went to the living room and sat down to watch some TV. He wondered what the fuck was wrong now with Justin. He couldn’t seem to shake away the need for drugs.

About an hour later Justin came out to find Brian in the kitchen getting something to eat. They stared at each other, nobody saying anything for a while.

“I’m going to take a shower,” the blond said.

Brian didn’t say anything and followed his man. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Taking a shower,” the blond pointed out like Brian was stupid.

The older man sighed. “Come on, Justin.”

“What do you want from me, Brian?” Justin asked.

“You’re falling apart,” Brian whispered.

“I’m fine,” the blond told him as he got naked.

“Then what the fuck are you taking?” Brian asked. “It’s the middle of the day.”

“So only at night are we allowed to use drugs?” Justin asked glaring at Brian. “You’re such a hypocrite.”

Brian frowned and kept quiet.

“I just…” the blond said and thought about how to explain it to Brian. “I need them to paint.”

“The fuck you do,” Brian hissed. “You’re a wonderful artist. All on your own.”

“You don’t know that,” Justin muttered as he stepped in the shower.

Brian moved away and went to the blond’s bedroom. He started searching for the blond’s stash. When Justin came out, Brian was still looking. Justin thought that Brian wanted to smoke so he showed him where it was. Brian grabbed the box and walked to the bathroom. The blond was hot on his heels.

“What the hell are you doing?” Justin asked.

Brian didn’t answer him and just started throwing everything down the drain. Justin tried to stop him but Brian pushed him away.

“No!” Justin yelled and punched Brian on the face.

The brunet hit him back. They stared at each other with anger plastered on their faces. Then Justin looked down and his shoulders started to shake.

“Justin,” Brian whispered.

“I want to feel wanted,” Justin whispered. “This helps.”

“You don’t have to use this crap,” Brian told him. “You are wanted.”

The blond frowned. “I have more.”

Brian looked down at the box and nodded. “I know.”

Justin came closer and they hugged each other. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too,” Brian told him.

“I just get so crazy if I don’t take something,” Justin whispered.

“That’s called an addiction,” the brunet muttered. “Doesn’t Mitchell send you to have drug tests?”

“He’s just happy that I show up sometimes,” Justin said. “I just tell him that I am still feeling the same and that I don’t want to share shit with him and he keeps saying that he’s there for me. What a bunch of crap.”

Brian sighed. “You can’t keep doing this,” the man said.

“I’ll be okay,” Justin assured him. “I’ll take it easy.”

Brian frowned, not sure that Justin was able to do that. He just hugged his man because there was nothing else to do at the moment.

***

_I guess you are the only one that nobody changes,_  
I guess you are the only one left standing  
When everything else goes down 

Justin was smiling as he sat on the floor playing with Reaper and Slayer. He had picked both dogs from the groom where Brian had started taking them two weeks ago.

"They look so beautiful," Justin said. "My babies are not babies anymore, Bri.”

The brunet rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I know," the man responded as he was in the kitchen in only a pair of sweats. He had been exercising. "I need a bath."

"Why are you telling me?" Justin asked and looked back. "Is it that you want me to do your back?"

Brian grinned as he opened the fridge door to get a bottle of water. "You only wish."

Justin laughed at that. He would have Brian begging him to fuck him in no time. He had his ways and the brunet knew it too.

There was a knock on the door and Brian groaned and went to see who it was.

"You fucking shit!” Claire yelled.

Brian stared from his sister to his mother. "What do you two want?"

"John told us what you did to him," Claire said.

"That I grabbed him by his ear when I caught him stealing?" Brian asked and turned to his mother. "Your grandson is such a sinner. We should pray for him."

Joan looked at the brunet sideways as she held a hand over her chest.

Claire pushed Brian back with all her might. "You know what you did!"

"What the fuck?" Brian asked after having lost his balance momentarily.

Slayer and Reaper started barking and Justin had to hold both dogs back. He had been listening to them talk but stayed out of it.

"I should go," Justin said when both women were staring at him.

“Oh my god,” Joan said. “It’s true. You are a pedophile.”

"What?" Brian asked getting the magnitude of the situation then. "What did John say I did to him?"

“How old are you?” Claire asked. “Does your Mom know you are here?”

Justin frowned as he stared at her. “What the fuck is going on, Brian?”

“Joan, Claire, meet Justin," the brunet said. "Justin, meet my mother and sister."

"Nice to meet you,” Justin said. “What’s going on?”

“They are accusing me of having done something to John,” Brian informed him.

“The little minion from hell?” Justin asked.

The blond had the pleasure of meeting Brian's nephew the day before when Brian took the boy to the diner.

“Watch out your fucking mouth!” Claire hissed. “That’s my son.”

“Oh,” Justin said. “Well, good luck with that.”

“How old are you?” Joan asked him.

“Twenty six,” Justin told her. “Why?”

“Just making sure you are not another of the kids that I am molesting,” Brian told him.

“There are more?” Justin asked. “Who?”

Brian rolled his eyes.

“We are going to take this to court!” Claire hissed.

Justin shook his head and pulled their dogs to the bedroom. Then he went to the bathroom with them and closed the door. He went back outside where Joan and Claire were screaming at the brunet.

"Hey!" Justin yelled and they stopped. "You said we're going to take this to court so we'll see you there. You can leave now."

Brian smirked at them.

Joan shook her head. "I thought there was hope for you. Father Tom had said you were a good boy."

"Is she talking about the priest that you fucked?" Justin asked, arching a brow.

Joan looked at Justin like he was from another world.

"What the fuck did you just say?" Claire asked shocked.

Justin shook his head slightly. "I know, I know. Are there any straight people left in this world?"

And Brian couldn't help but laugh his ass off.

“He’s not serious,” Joan said. “Father Tom is a saint!”

Brian sighed. “Whatever. Just leave my house.”

“Oh my god,” Claire said. “He’s not lying.”

Joan opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. She made a fist over her chest. Then the woman turn around looking like there was something sour in her mouth. Claire screamed at Brian some more before she left in the same direction that her mother had.

Brian looked at Justin. “Did you have to do that?”

“I thought you were going to tell her,” the blond pointed out.

The brunet sighed. “I need something to drink,” he said and left in the direction of the shower.

Justin looked around the loft. He shook his head and left. He went home and took a shower as well, got dressed and headed for Woody’s. When he arrived at the bar Brian was there drinking.

“So,” Justin said. “How are you feeling?”

Brain gave him a look that would make anyone shut up for having asked such a stupid question.

“That bad,” Justin said and took a deep breath.

“Hey guys,” Emmett said smiling. “How is it going?”

Michael, who was with the tall man, didn’t say anything. He just glared at the blond as a way of greeting him.

“Just fucking peachy,” Brian whispered.

“What did you do to him now?” Michael asked.

Brian related what had happened.

“Oh my god,” Emmett said. “But where did he get that twisted story?”

“Are you saying I did something to him?” Brian asked.

“No,” Emmett quickly answered. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

Justin asked for a beer and didn’t say anything. Later on Ted arrived and they filled him in on what was going on with Brian. They talked about the issue for a long time until Brian told everyone to go fuck themselves. By then Justin had left and was in the backroom with a tall blond who had caught his eye.

“Brian,” Michael said. “It’s going to be okay. You’ll see.”

Brian nodded and got up. “I’m going home.”

Michael watched him go and sighed. He wished he could do more for his friend. An hour later he was leaving and saw Justin with a guy. He went straight to him.

“You’re an asshole,” Michael told him. “Did you know that? Brian needs you and look at where you are.”

“Brian is a big boy,” Justin replied. “So fuck off.”

The blond and the trick left quickly. They ended up at Justin’s apartment. They fucked like mad men and when they were done, Justin told the man to leave because he had to go. Then the blond went to the loft to check on Brian. He knew that Brian needed him; he didn’t need Michael telling him so.

“Brian,” Justin said locking the door.

Brian opened his eyes slowly and didn’t say anything. He just waited for the blond.

“Bri,” Justin said as he came into the bedroom. He got in the bed and ran a hand over Brian’s back. “Are you okay?”

“Fucking perfect,” he muttered.

The blond smirked and started to undress. Then he got under the covers with his lover.

“Aren’t you going to ask me?” Brian asked. “If I did anything to him or say anything that led him to have this crazy story.”

“What the fuck do I care?” Justin asked. “It’s your fucking problem if you did.”

Brian wanted to slap Justin. “I didn’t.”

“Good for you,” Justin told him. “It’s a crime to fuck minors and you get fucked up if you get caught and not only that, Brian. He's family. As kinky as I am, I do need to draw a line.”

“Funny as always,” Brian said.

“I try babe,” Justin said putting his arms behind his head.

Brian sighed and the blond turned to look at him. Justin moved closer and kissed Brian.

“Hey, Brian,” he said serious.

“What?” Brian asked, annoyed with his boyfriend.

“I knew you didn’t do it,” Justin whispered to Brian. “You didn’t have to say a word.”

Brian kissed Justin’s forehead and held him close.

***

_No, don't, leave me to die here._  
Help me survive here, alone.  
Don't Surrender! Surrender! 

When Brian arrived at Justin’s apartment he had good news for the man. He had brought the dogs with him because he didn’t want to leave them alone at the loft. The growing mutts went to find Justin who was in the bedroom. Brian found Justin taking some drugs.

“What are you doing here?” Justin asked and cleaned his nose quickly.

Brian knew it was one of those days. When it wasn’t drugs it was booze but it had to be something. “I wanted to tell you that John told Claire the truth.”

“That’s nice Mr. Teflon,” Justin told him.

“Justin,” Brian whispered. “What now?”

The blond shook his head. “I’m fine.”

“Jus,” Brian said as he neared the blond. “Are you going to keep doing that?” Brian asked.

Justin sniffed and got up from the bed. He shoved the vial into his pocket. “What is it to you?”

“You know I care about you and…I love you,” Brian whispered. “That shit is too strong. You won’t be able to put it down.”

Justin rubbed his face and then stared at the brunet. He walked over to Brian and hugged the man. They kissed for a few seconds before Justin pulled back.

“I feel the same,” Justin assured him and nodded. “I want to show you how much.”

“Maybe you should take a cold shower,” the brunet said as he rubbed the blond’s shoulders.

“Are you serious?” Justin asked.

“Look at you,” Brian hissed. “Fuck!”

Justin frowned and moved away from the brunet. His body was shaking slightly. He walked out of the bedroom. Brian was hot on his heels.

“Leave me alone Brian,” the blond said.

“I want you to stop,” Brian said.

Justin stood in front of the sink. “I…I’ll try.”

Brian wanted to point out that Justin had already promised that, but he didn’t. “Let’s talk about something else.”

“What’s that?” Justin asked.

“I want you to move in with me,” Brian whispered.

“What?” Justin asked.

Brian arched a brow. He wasn’t going to start repeating the things he said, certainly not that. Justin pulled away from the sink and turned around so he could look at the brunet. He crossed his arms, not sure he was hearing right.

“What are you thinking?” Brian asked scared shitless. He knew he shouldn’t have opened his mouth.

“This place is bigger,” Justin told him and walked around the kitchen island towards the brunet.

Brian looked around and shrugged. “I’ll move my stuff then.”

“Don’t think for a minute I am carrying shit. Get the guys to do it,” Justin said. “It will be cheap too.”

Brian grinned.

“And...I think you should keep the loft,” the blond said. “Just in case.”

Brian nodded, he had thought about that ahead of time.

“And wow,” Justin said and chuckled. “Are we really living together?”

“We do most of the time,” Brian pointed out as he caressed Justin’s face. “I want you near me. I want to take care of you.”

The blond frowned momentarily. “I’m a big boy.”

“I know,” Brian told him.

“I don’t need help,” Justin said pulling away.

“Justin,” Brian said as he followed the blond. “I’m not moving in with you because you need help. It’s because I want to be with you.”

Justin stopped and sighed. He didn’t know what to think anymore. Brian moved forward and embraced his lover. He kissed Justin’s neck and started caressing the blond’s skin where he could.

“So…” the man said. “What was it? What got you like this?”

“A stupid fight with my dad,” Justin informed him. “What else is new?”

Brian wrapped his arms around him. “Let it go.”

“I’m so fucking angry right now,” Justin told him. “He thinks he knows me.”

Brian sighed. “Look at me,” he whispered.

Justin looked up with glassy eyes.

“You can’t let him do this to you,” Brian told him. “You have to be stronger than that.”

“It’s easier said than done,” the blond muttered.

“I know,” Brian told him.

Justin was about to yell at the man that he didn’t know shit but ended up just nodding. He knew that Brian had a taste of what it was having a father that didn’t understand you. He turned in Brian’s arms and hugged him tightly.

“It helps me forget everything,” Justin whispered. “You know.”

Brian knew when he would run to drugs to help him forget as well. “I understand that.”

Justin closed his eyes and leaned closer to the brunet.

“Hey,” Brian said. “You okay?”

Justin didn’t answer. Brian sighed and led the blond to the bedroom once again. The brunet put him on the bed and then took the dogs that were following them around, out of the room before closing the door. He went to the bed and lay next to his man.

“You feel so good,” Justin moaned. “Warm.”

“You don’t even know what’s happening anymore,” Brian told him.

“You’ll keep me safe,” the blond replied.

“Will I?” Brian asked.

Justin giggled and caressed Brian’s face. He got on top of the man and kissed him. Brian kissed him back. He took Justin’s pants off and then his own clothes. Justin had his eyes closed the whole time.

“Jus,” Brian muttered.

“I don’t feel good,” Justin said suddenly.

Brian frowned and was kneeling next to the man in seconds. “You’re scaring me.”

Justin sighed and didn’t say anything.

“Justin?” Brian said shaking the blond a bit.

The blond groaned a bit. Brian quickly picked Justin up and carried him to the bathroom. He pushed the blond under the cold shower. Justin opened his eyes and started at Brian. Then suddenly the blond started convulsing and then puked his insides out.

“Fuck,” Brian hissed as he held him.

It felt like days passed as the brunet held Justin in his arms. The cold water didn’t bother Brian any longer. He just wanted Justin to be okay.

“Brian,” the blond said after a while.

“What?” Brian asked.

The blond looked around and wondered when he had come to the bathroom. “Why are we sitting here?”

Brian didn’t answer him.

The blond lay back against the tile wall. He looked at the ceiling as Brian stared at him. The brunet just kneeled there hoping that Justin would put everything behind him. Nobody said a thing and the older man watched as the blue eyes filled with unshed tears. It hurt so much, Brian thought, to know that your lover was suffering, had one hellish nightmare overtaking him pretty much each day and you didn’t now how to help him.

Brian pulled the blond into his arms. He caressed Justin’s face and sighed. He kissed him on the forehead and then the lips and Justin still kept staring at the ceiling.

“Don’t leave,” Justin whispered suddenly.

“I won’t,” Brian replied.

***

_Do you listen to yourself?  
Never lived for someone else_

“Smile for the camera Gus,” Lindsay said.

“Just take the picture,” Brian told them.

“You guys have to smile,” Justin said with his arms crossed as he stared at father and son.

Lindsay laughed as she held the camera waiting for the perfect moment.

“Where do you guys want this?” Emmett asked as he held the box in his arms.

“You have so much crap,” Ted said. “Where did you keep it hidden?”

“It’s not crap,” Brian yelled at Ted.

Gus laughed then and put his hand on Brian’s face. Brian looked at his son and smiled. Lindsay took the picture then.

“That’s perfect,” she said. “Go, Justin. You have to be in the picture too.”

Justin smiled and nodded.

“Okay,” Debbie said. “I brought food. Justin, can you tell me where the plates are?”

The blond pointed at the top cupboard at the far end. Then he smiled just in time as the next picture was taken.

“I like this place,” Lindsay said. “I really do.”

Brian rolled his eyes and let Justin hold Gus.

Justin smiled at the boy. “How is it going, little guy?”

Gus giggled and squirmed to be let down. He had some experimenting to do around the new place like any other toddler would. Justin put him down and watched him running away. Lindsay yelled and ran after him.

“I’m going to get the rest of my things,” Brian said to Justin.

The brunet left and when he came back into the apartment Michael was with him. Brian looked angry and Michael was behind him talking without stopping.

“I don’t understand why you’re doing this, Brian,” Michael said. “This is not you.”

The man rolled his eyes and didn’t say anything to his best friend.

“What happened to you?” Michael asked. “You always did whatever you wanted and…”

“You just said it!” Brian hissed at his friend. “I never fucking do what everyone expects from me! I do whatever the fuck I want whenever the fuck I want and whoever the fuck I want to do it with!”

Michael took a step back. Everyone turned to look at them.

“I want to move here with Justin and there is nothing that anyone can say to make me go,” Brian said.

“What if I kick you out?” Justin asked looking dead serious. “Then you would have to go.”

“Shut up,” Brian hissed.

The blond chuckled.

“I have to go,” Michael said and quickly exited the place.

Justin quickly went after the man. “Michael,” he said catching up to the man.

“What the fuck do you want?” Michael asked turning around.

“I know you hate me,” Justin said.

Michael stayed silent.

“But…” he said and sighed not sure what he was thinking. “I know Brian and you are best friends and I don’t want that to stop. I don’t have anything against you, really.”

“You hate me too,” Michael pointed out.

“That could be true,” Justin said and shrugged. “But Brian is your best friend and I won’t fuck with that unless you fuck with me.”

Michael shook his head. “You’re no good for him and sooner or later he’s going to see that.”

Justin watched the man go with a frown in place before he went back to his home. He didn’t help with anything like he told Brian. But he did help Brian organize some of his stuff. They ate what Debbie had brought and played with Gus.

When everyone was gone Brian got busy putting his things away while Justin sat on the sofa doing some sketches of the paintings he wanted to do. The brunet was in the kitchen adding a few of his things to the ones that Justin had already when his phone rang.

“That’s my cell,” Brian said.

“Uh huh,” Justin replied as he kept drawing while he sat on the couch.

“It’s right next to you,” Brian told him.

“Is it?” Justin asked, already knowing it. He could hear it ring and see the flashing blue light from the corner of his eye.

“Yeah,” Brian, who was serving himself a glass of juice, answered. He stared at the back of Justin’s head and thought of throwing something at him for acting like an idiot.

Justin arched a brow and looked back at Brian that was just standing there. “So, what, I’m your secretary now?”

Brian arched a brow. “Are you bitching already?”

“You can pick it up with your hand if you walk here with your legs which work perfectly fine,” Justin pointed out. The cell phone stopped ringing then but a few seconds later was ringing again.

“It could be important,” Brian said.

“You better run,” Justin said looking again at Brian.

“You are such an ass,” Brian told him. “You’re right next to it.”

Justin and Brian stared at each other before Justin chucked. “I know,” the blond said.

Brian rolled his eyes and shook his head.

Justin reached for the brunet’s cell phone. “Hello?”

“Hey,” the guy said sexily. “This is Keith.”

“Right,” Justin said. “And what do you want?”

“I thought we were meeting,” Keith said. “Brian?”

“Hold on,” Justin said. “It’s one of your tricks and he wants to know when you guys are going to fuck,” the blond informed him as he lifted the phone up and towards Brian so the brunet would move to get it.

Brian came over and grabbed the phone.

“Now you move,” Justin said smirking. “Ass.”

“Bitch,” Brian told him as he went back to the kitchen.

Justin could hear Brian muttering and he chuckled at that. He ignored the brunet and focused on what he was doing. A few minutes later he heard Brian moving away towards the bedroom. Justin wondered if Brian was going out but didn’t ask the man. He looked down at his dogs that were resting at his feet.

“Justin,” Brian said coming from the bedroom as he put on his jacket.

Justin looked away from his drawing to his partner.

“I’m going out,” Brian said. “I’ll be back later.”

“Be careful,” Justin told him. “Did you take enough condoms?”

“Yes mother,” Brian mocked as he moved away to grab his cell phone that he’d left on the kitchen counter.

Justin laughed and went back to his drawing. Then he felt a light kiss on the back of his neck and he looked up and smiled at Brian.

Brian leaned forward and kissed Justin on the lips. When he pulled back he was smiling. “Later,” he said and walked towards the door.

“Later,” Justin replied.

***

_It’s never going to last, it’s  
Never going to make it out alive_

“We’re so late,” Brian said.

“I thought you like being late,” Justin pointed out.

Brian didn’t reply to that and just went inside Debbie’s house. Justin closed the door and apparently everyone was too focused on what they were doing because either they didn’t heard them or just didn’t care.

“Twenty dollars they don’t make it past three weeks,” Ted said.

“Twenty dollars that they don’t go past two weeks,” Michael said. “God, even less than that.”

“Forty that it won’t go longer than a week,” Justin said putting the money on the table. “I mean Brian is so hard to live with. I’m going to kill him and stuff the body far, far away. Or I could also chop him to pieces and put him on the fridge and then serve him to you guys. No one would be the wiser.”

“Justin,” Melanie had gasped somewhere along Justin’s speech.

“Uh,” Ted stuttered. “I’m sorry,” he said shaking his head as Justin tried to give him some money.

“What? Can’t I bet on my own relationship?” Justin asked.

Brian rolled his eyes.

Vic smirked seeing how Justin wasn’t letting anyone rain on his parade. “You guys are late.”

“Sorry,” Justin said. “I was stuck someplace.”

“You mean your cock,” Melanie said and rolled her eyes.

“Yes, I do,” Justin said grinning, as he sat down. “I was trying to have some finesse.”

“The two of you can’t stop fucking,” Michael commented.  
  
“I had nothing to do with it,” Brian pointed out.

“For once he was ready before me,” Justin assured them.

“God,” Melanie said rolling her eyes. “Why are you two even together?”

“Leave them alone,” Debbie said kissing Justin on the cheek. “My babies are good for each other. They love each other.”

“Love?” Justin asked. “What’s that?”

Brian smirked as he sat down.

“You need to eat,” Debbie said. “Sit down.”

Justin did and smiled at Michael.

“Look at how skinny you are,” Debbie told him.

“Drugs do that to you,” Michael pointed out.

The blond laughed. “You mean the ones that we all take? Come on, Michael.”

“Drop it,” Brian said and both Michael and Justin did. At least they didn’t talk about that particular problem.

“So how are things?” Lindsay asked looking at Brian. “Do you guys like living together?”

The brunet shrugged.

“There is nothing different,” Justin told him.

The two men talked a bit more about their moving in together. Everyone had a million of questions. Justin ate a bit and for once Brian ate more than the blond. When it was all over Lindsay and Melanie were the first to leave. Then it was Emmett and Ted. Brian claimed that they were going but first went up to the bathroom.

The blond got up and went outside to smoke some weed. When the door opened it was Michael that came out. The younger man sighed and prepared himself for some more of Michael’s crap. He just knew that Michael was going to say something and it would be directed to piss him off.

“You have a bad problem,” Michael said. “My mom is right. You are really skinny if she only knew why. It’s going to kill you.”

“Wouldn’t you like that, though?” Justin asked. “For me to O.D., eh Michael?”

Michael stared at the blond coldly.

“It’s not your life,” Justin said and took a long drag from his joint.

“I am scared of what you’re going to do to Brian while you’re with him,” Michael said.

The blond shrugged. “He’s not a kid that needs someone to watch over him.”

“You don’t care about him, do you?” Michael asked, crossing his arms. “That’s why you two won’t last.”

“Is that so?” Justin asked and chuckled.

“Yeah, you guys are never going to make it,” Michael spat out.

“So what if we don’t?” Justin asked. “It’s still none of your fucking business, Mikey,” he smirked and turned away leaving the angry man behind.

Brian chose that moment to come outside. He had been listening to everything from inside the house.

“Did you hear all he said?” Michael asked.

Brian pulled out his cigarettes. He lighted one and nodded. “Yeah,” he said letting the smoke escape his mouth.

“He’s an asshole,” Michael said.

“He’s my partner,” Brian told him. “And he’s right. It’s not your business, Mikey.”

Suddenly the Jeep stopped in front of them with a loud screech. Brian looked at Justin and then at Michael before he walked to the Jeep and got inside. Debbie came outside to see what was going on. She frowned when she saw Michael walking away with his head down.

“You know that he was out here fighting with Justin,” Vic whispered behind his sister.

Debbie sighed at that. “He’ll get used to him.”

“It’s been a while now,” Vic told him.

“I know,” the woman said.

“One of this days Brian is going to get tired, Deb,” Vic said. “And his friendship with Michael won’t hold what’s to come.”

Debbie sighed knowing it was true but hoping it wouldn’t come to that. “You really think that Brian loves Justin more than Michael.”

“I think he loves them both in different ways,” Vic informed her as he put his arm around her shoulders. “But Justin is not pushing him to do things that Brian doesn’t want. You see, it doesn’t matter what we think about Brian and Justin. The two of them understand each other; they work their shit out on their own.”

The woman knew that when Brian was pushed to his limits he reacted and responded harshly. She knew that her son was in love with the man and there was no hope for Michael. And what little Brian and Michael could have, her son was crushing little by little.

“It will be okay,” Debbie said, moving towards the kitchen.

Vic shrugged but didn’t think so.


End file.
